I Caught A Shitlord This Big: The Tall Tales Of Tumblr - And that thread... was Albert Einstein.

[Handsome Pete]

I would, but reasons.

Content:

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As everyone knows, white gays are the devil.

That reaction image doesn't really capture the full scope of what happened. Allow me to revise.

Tumblrite: Ugh, racist appropriator.

Every Other Customer: Ugh, faggot.

 

[The Joker]

I can't decide which is worse, the sjw stories or the anti- sjw stories...

 

[ActualKiwi]

I can't decide which is worse, the sjw stories or the anti- sjw stories...

>Hair dyed
>Must be an SJW
You can tell it's going to be a good story from the first line. And then it takes the red-eye straight to crazy town.
Do people who write this shit actually believe their little fantasies?
Hell, does anyone who read that actually believe an obvious troll?

 

[APerson]

I can't decide which is worse, the sjw stories or the anti- sjw stories...

The term is "intentional parody, not meant to be believed". For the love of Cthulthu, the "Albert Einstein" didn't tip you off?

 

[Piga Dgrifm]

I can't decide which is worse, the sjw stories or the anti- sjw stories...

Meh. This one's a parody.

 

[& Knuckles]

 

[kidsquid]

Not a tumblr post but on my dash.

 

[fishercat]

 

[ShittyRecolor]

Some of these stories are just precious, I really need to get around making a comic or two out of them! The cringe is real!

 

[kidsquid]

I have no reaction that can sum up my feelings about this.

 

[Dalish]

I have no reaction that can sum up my feelings about this.

To be fair, this might be accurate (or perhaps just a bit exaggerated) . Having worked at a vidya store where we gotta tell parents about the ESRB rating, a lot of them have pretty weird justifications for getting their kids games patently not made for kids.

 

[TheMightyMonarch]

To be fair, this might be accurate (or perhaps just a bit exaggerated) . Having worked at a vidya store where we gotta tell parents about the ESRB rating, a lot of them have pretty weird justifications for getting their kids games patently not made for kids.

I reckon the porno bit is obviously false though.

 

[SteelPlatedHeart]

"And everyone applau-" oh wait, she actually said that in the story.

 

[FramerGirl420]

" making gross ass male noises"

 

[Koby_Fish]

" making gross ass male noises"

Don't they mean "Making gross male ass noises"?

 

[Oracle]

"If you get hurt it ain't my fault" is definitely something a gym teacher who is responsible for these kids would say!

I'm very glad that she led into it by explaining that he's straight, since that had a ton of bearing on the story.

 

[sassyma seed]

What is it with these kinda stories assuming retail workers actually give a shit about things?

If some guy was actually acting like this, they'd just tell that's the company policy, and to show his stupid passport or go away.

 

[Arcanineinchnails]

You can notice those stories are obviously written by someone who has never worked a day in their lives.

 

[Tragi-Chan]

Every time I've seen a girl ask for a hot wheel or whatever at McDonald's she's just gotten one without anyone kicking up a fuss. Only people I've ever seen getting their twats in a twist over it have been progressive whackjobs on the internet who want to pretend McDs doesn't treat them like special enough snowflakes.

Case in point, apparently the Happy Meal is someone's reason to be a feminist: http://365reasonstobeafeminist.tumblr.com/post/83604238032/113-because-of-mcdonalds

McDonalds vs Tumblr. It's like Alien vs Predator, except you can just ignore the result.

 

[Pepsi-Cola]