Share Your School Stories - Weirdos, freaks, and idiots (self-inclusion optional)

[Duke Nukem]

In our computer art class we used to download music from Napster or whatever file sharing software was around then (I forget which one). Was pretty funny in hindsight.

There was also an underclassman who was a total ass, so one time when he was in the bathroom or whatever my friend sat at his computer and deleted all his files (this was before screen locking was common). Was funny but didn't do any damage since he had already turned in all of them

Then there was the kid who looked at porn during the class because we figured out how to get around the proxy on the browser software. He got busted but didn't get reported or anything, just a warning from the teacher. Was even funnier because his spot was in front of a window, so anyone walking by could see what he was doing

Yeah when I mentioned it to my dad I thought he'd flip a lid but instead he educated me on the dangers of online music piracy. Turns out he was correct about all that peer to peer stuff.

You know what though, if the music industry weren't such tight asses about things and actually stepped forth to embrace the internet as a means of moving their products, it would have at least partially solved their problems. Guess the CD factory would have been cut out of the loop and they couldn't have that, creating the physical discs is a cost that you don't have when going fully digital/MP3 format.

The most I've ever done to "prank" classmates computer wise was to change the desktop background or the mouse clicking sound to something I found funny or offensive. That teacher I mentioned was kind of an estrogenic douchebag, like the Try Guys if they were angry assholes all the time. Deleting your classmate's files is kind of a dick move unless he's a huge bully or something, then maybe it's kinda permissible, but still.

Also I can't imagine trying to look up porn on any computer in the late 90s, especially in class. Maybe your school had DSL? I did go to my school to download unrelated items onto a floppy or USB stick. But honestly, doing it in a position where any idiot can see the tits and ass on your screen???

Cooming's one hell of a drug.

The student committee at my school is pitching for a twerking contest as a welcome back event.

It will go as well as you'd expect.

One time there was a cookout nearby, all the Black girls started twerking excessively over trap music. Even the dance club joined in. A couple of them even begun to randomly twerk to the closest male around them.

I noped the fuck out of there. Not before taking some food with me.

I don't think twerking was really a big thing when I was in school, but I've seen worse. Glad I got out when I did though.

I believe it was a month or so after 9/11 that my school had a bomb threat, and we all had to get our asses out of the building and line up while they sniffed through all of our shit. Quite a few people got busted for cannabis possession, but a guy I knew from my bus somehow avoided getting swept up in the net himself. Of course in the wake of WTC it was a huge deal, but eventually they found the perpetrator, turned out it was some guy from the football team that got dumped by his girlfriend of one day. I didn't follow the case or find out his name but I heard he got slapped with a six figure fine at 16 years old or whatever. Not to mention he probably didn't have to worry about exams or girlfriends for a while.

Another guy from my school attempted an armed robbery at a liquor store and had a heart attack induced by crack cocaine use when he was there. Like he overdosed when the cops got there, was a bit tenuous for the responding officers but they were cleared of foul play. He was kind of an asshole anyway so, eh.

At least one guy I encountered and had less than friendly interactions with ended up in prison for multiple charges, robbery, assault on female, firearm discharge at an occupied property, and a few others including prison infractions.

 

[Kiwi Lime Pie]

A couple of school drinking stories that involve athletes.

During my sophomore year of high school, a senior I'll call Nate decided it was a good idea to have a huge drinking party while his parents were away. Being an athlete, Nate invited other athletes and orbiters he knew would likely come to the party.

That evening, my parents had the police scanner on and a police dispatch to a loud party turned out to be for Nate's drinking party when I confirmed the address with the phone book. Because this was before underage drinking was cracked down on, I believe most of the party-goers received a call to their parents to pick them up and a slap on the wrist.

Nate and his parents, however, received a citation under whatever local ordinance existed for underage drinking at the time. Whatever the final outcome was for Nate and his family apparently involved a stiff fine because Nate started shaking down party attendees for money to help him pay off the fine.

The kicker out of all of this was that this happened the night before a basketball game. With a number of basketball players planning to join Nate, I wondered if any of them would be suspended from school the next day which would make them ineligible for the game and leave the school potentially having to forfeit for lack of players. Surprisingly, everyone dressed and played in the game -- something that likely wouldn't happen now with the stricter laws and school policies regarding underage drinking that exist today.
***
In college, an opposing school -- a fundie college -- had a huge drinking scandal during the middle of basketball season that resulted in a significant number of its student-athletes being suspended or ultimately dismissed from both the team and the school. The star player for their men's basketball team was one of the disciplined individuals, so our men's team managed to beat them for the first and only time during my college years. However, the women's team from the fundie college had so many members caught at the party that they had to dress the team manager in order to have enough players for the game against our women's team.

 

[Boopims]

Years ago, on the last day of the semester, my communications professor sperged out on the class, literally screaming and essentially unloading emotional problems. She was quickly escorted out of the building and fired. Was truly a sight to behold

 

[Never Scored]

Then there was the kid who looked at porn during the class because we figured out how to get around the proxy on the browser software. He got busted but didn't get reported or anything, just a warning from the teacher. Was even funnier because his spot was in front of a window, so anyone walking by could see what he was doing

Around 2000/01 we had these old computers with Windows 3.1 in our home room because our home room teacher also taught keyboarding. They had internet access and 256 colours but you didn’t have to log in to use them.

A buddy and I used to changed the background on all of them to these tiled pictures of half naked women in glorious grainy low resolution with 256 colours. Our teacher had this thick lisp and used to freak out and ask if anyone knew who was doing this and everyone would just play dumb.

 

[BlaireWhitesBottom]

NGL, as much as this sounds like an absolute dumpster fire in terms of execution, this also sounds hilarious and I want to give you and your classmates an A for effort simply because it sounds like you tried to have fun even if many of you hammed it up.

Thread tax: In junior high, those of us that arrived early enough would play an impromptu game of touch football on the playground until the bell rung to summon us inside. It wasn't unheard of for the female athletes and tomboys to join in and play, too. One particular morning, a girl received a pass and was running down the field. I'm not sure why he said it, but the star athlete guy from my class tagged her and then yelled, "Give me the ball, or I'll kick you in the pussy!" It was out of character for him to scream something like that because he wasn't one of the two guys in our class notorious for their crudeness. Everyone involved in the game immediately froze in surprise and gave him a WTF look.

Lmfao this reminds me of my best friends sister who used to play football with us. She's kicked the shit out of two negresses for running their mouths it's actually quite hilarious.

 

[AnsemSoD1]

Got into an autistic slap fight with another autistic, of my own volition, in Freshman Year of High School.

 

[NerdShamer]

• Several teachers we had were pretty nasty to the kids, particularly in fifth grade. A few notable examples I can think of are when one of them would scream at the whole class when one person did something (or just punish the whole class), and I remember one time during recess when a bunch of kids were sitting out as punishment, the two main teachers were sitting in front of them talking and eating donuts, and I'm pretty sure they were rubbing it in the faces of the kids who were being punished. One of my classmates from that time was also a classmate of mine in late high school, and she remarked once how nasty those teachers were to all of us.

The worst teacher that I ever heard of was this fat woman in her 40s who was prone to yelling at her students. She was so loud that I can occasionally hear her yelling inside her bungalow of an classroom whenever I was switching classes.

But the only interaction that I ever had with her was when me and around 20 other kids were chilling at the tables during recess because of the ongoing heat wave. She popped out of nowhere to yell at us about how we kids were supposed to be exercising or some other shit (she was also our de facto PE teacher) and threatened to give us all detention.

I heard that she mellowed out an little bit after she had an heart attack, but everyone still hated her.

 

[Kiwi Lime Pie]

She popped out of nowhere to yell at us about how we kids were supposed to be exercising or some other shit (she was also our de facto PE teacher) and threatened to give us all detention.

This reminds me of the lead playground monitor during the later years at my K-8 school that had a reputation for being rude, nasty, and playing favorites in that she never disciplined students in her kids' classes for the same things she disciplined other students. I think I might have discussed her here before, so I'll just post the story relevant to the quote. Today, I'll call her Mrs. X.

One winter day, we were playing touch football on the playground during lunch recess. Someone slipped and fell on their own volition (they simply lost their footing) and Mrs. X immediately confronted us, demanded our Nerf football and took it away on the grounds we were playing too rough. Having nothing else to do, we simply stood around. She then yelled at us for doing nothing even though a number of kids at our school chose not to participate in playground sports and instead stood/sat around to observe everyone else or talk about whatever on a daily basis.

To comply with her newest demand that we do something, someone scooped up some snow, made a snowball, and we resumed our football game. Because the snowballs disintegrated any time they hit someone if they weren't caught gently enough, we started to enjoy ourselves and our makeshift game. Mrs. X once again confronted us to scold us for throwing snowballs. At this point, I think most of my classmates and felt like we were damned if we did anything and damned if we didnt.

Mrs. X's awful behavior as a playground monitor was such that few students were shocked or upset when we learned during my 8th grade year that someone got her family's address out of the school's printed parent/guardian directory and flung bologna all over their property one night. I'd be willing to bet many of the students she unjustly disciplined felt she had it coming even if they couldn't openly admit it.

 

[Vyse Inglebard]

Around 2000/01 we had these old computers with Windows 3.1 in our home room because our home room teacher also taught keyboarding. They had internet access and 256 colours but you didn’t have to log in to use them.

A buddy and I used to changed the background on all of them to these tiled pictures of half naked women in glorious grainy low resolution with 256 colours. Our teacher had this thick lisp and used to freak out and ask if anyone knew who was doing this and everyone would just play dumb.

"WHO'S BEEN SHOWIN' TITSSSSSS?!"

 

[toilet_rainbow]

I don’t remember any particularly shitty teachers, although I do remember that one time the entire sixth grade had to convene in the school theater to see an inspirational speaker. Said speaker spent a few minutes telling us that we were the worst generation and we were utterly fucked entitled little shits because we all got participation trophies and shit. I don’t remember much else because I eventually tuned her out

 

[AnOminous]

I don’t remember any particularly shitty teachers, although I do remember that one time the entire sixth grade had to convene in the school theater to see an inspirational speaker. Said speaker spent a few minutes telling us that we were the worst generation and we were utterly fucked entitled little shits because we all got participation trophies and shit. I don’t remember much else because I eventually tuned her out

I bet you were sorry you ignored that inspirational speaker when you ended up LIVING in a VAN down by the RIVER!

 

[Cool Dog]

Some dayglo hair cunt in my class, talking 2000s when that shit was still rare, used to piss off this big guy constantly

One day he was looking really angry so she said "what you gonna do? punch me?"

He did, bitch fell face on the ground, and nobody did anything because the guy was built like a brick house and had already shoved some lankly guy's head against a pole giving him a concussion

Point is: white knights wont do anything if they will get their shit kicked in, so bitches better watch what they say

 

[The Last Stand]

I remember in between school transfers, the speds in the front of the bus would inflate condoms and toss them around. Pop them? Get blasted with spit and God knows what.

 

[murph]

There was a Thai girl in middle school who played Clarinet competently and when lice ran through our school she was blamed for it. She also bled through her pants once.

I hope when this world ends she's in charge of the space laser that kills everyone.

 

[t(h)rash]

autistic kid in my year stormed math class holding a fire extinguisher and laughing like it was the funniest shit he'd ever done (whole class started laughing tbh so maybe it *was*). once when we were on a field trip he just left the group and ran to a nearby apartment complex and the workers closed the gates and wouldnt let him leave. the teacher had to explain he couldnt help himself and when questioned why he did that he said he "wanted to see what brand of elevators were they using"

 

[PipTheAlchemist]

She also bled through her pants once.

That's called a period, and it is one of the biggest reasons I don't trust women to do anything

 

[Kel1 shi1]

Our school had two female French teachers in their 20's that were also besties, there was the trashy thin blonde one and the fat one that orbited her hoping to pick up on her attention from men. Anyway they would go on vacation together often to somewhere in the south of France. Every time they came back they would apropos nothing start telling us stories about "Their friend" they had met on holiday during French lessons. Us kids might have only been 12 or so at the time but we knew all these stories were actually about the men they had hooked up with while on vacation.

 

[Xarpho's Return]

I took a class in criminal justice in high school and I'm pretty sure the textbook deliberately found the weirdest / most fucked-up cases to discuss in detail.

- A murder where a man, a drag queen, and the drag queen's one-legged uncle help dispose of the drag queen's aunt's body
- A serial killer who would slice off his female victim's nipples and eat them
- A man breaks into his home he lost to his ex-wife and cuts her lover's dick off, feeding it to the dog (the book makes note that the man's replacement penis was "unsatisfactory").

 

[NerdShamer]

- A man breaks into his home he lost to his ex-wife and cuts her lover's dick off, feeding it to the dog (the book makes note that the man's replacement penis was "unsatisfactory").

I might have heard that one, before. Can't remember when, though

 

[Xarpho's Return]

autistic kid in my year stormed math class holding a fire extinguisher and laughing like it was the funniest shit he'd ever done (whole class started laughing tbh so maybe it *was*). once when we were on a field trip he just left the group and ran to a nearby apartment complex and the workers closed the gates and wouldnt let him leave. the teacher had to explain he couldnt help himself and when questioned why he did that he said he "wanted to see what brand of elevators were they using"

Given the number of YouTube videos where autists go to public buildings and explain the elevators or escalators in great detail, he probably wasn't lying.