Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Beached Landwhale model, Body positive and social justice snacktivist, and gigantic fraud

[Barbarella]

Tess keeps throwing out pamphlets about Alopecia Areata. That’s an autoimmune disease. They gave her steroid shots, but she may need to try finasteride to prevent more from coming out. Or, she may be unlucky and just lose it all.

It’s not stress. It’s also not traction alopecia as it’s a circle at the back of her head, and a widening part. The only time Tess feels stressed is when she hasn’t eaten in a half hour (yanno, when her anorexia kicks in) or nobody is paying attention to her.

That Tula ad where she’s soaping up her leg had interesting anatomy. There is a space behind the knee where you can see a whole other leg under the fat. Fascinating and gross.

 

[Jumpingintrash]

Tess keeps throwing out pamphlets about Alopecia Areata. That’s an autoimmune disease. They gave her steroid shots, but she may need to try finasteride to prevent more from coming out. Or, she may be unlucky and just lose it all.

It’s not stress. It’s also not traction alopecia as it’s a circle at the back of her head, and a widening part. The only time Tess feels stressed is when she hasn’t eaten in a half hour (yanno, when her anorexia kicks in) or nobody is paying attention to her.

That Tula ad where she’s soaping up her leg had interesting anatomy. There is a space behind the knee where you can see a whole other leg under the fat. Fascinating and gross.

I literally need this unit's body explained to me every time I check in on this thread. Her stupid tik toks on here are usually so focused on that ever so ~dewey~ facial skin I tend to forget just how fucking huge she is when I see the full body shots (the tattoo vid had me shocked, not gonna lie) so thank you for this. She's getting to be amorphous in the wild.

 

[cactus]

In regards to Brendan Fraser, fuck you Tess. You only see him as another bandwagon to hop on and have nothing eloquent to say about what he's even talking about.

I love Brendan, but he needs to get therapy and lose the weight.

And I know I mentioned it already, but being that big does cause thinning hair, that's just how it is. It's not stress, it's not an autoimmune disorder, traction alopecia mainly affects the hairline in front and not the entire scalp, her hair loss is related to her weight and lacking nutrients.

 

[Daddy's Little Kitten]

I skimmed that Wiki article that was posted and diabetes can also contribute to alopecia areata.

Lol.

 

[Gramlol]

I skimmed that Wiki article that was posted and diabetes can also contribute to alopecia areata.

Lol.

Huh. Well then surely a competent Dr would also have her do a diabetes screen too, right? Untreated diabetes is incredibly serious.
As the prototypical 'fat person disease' though I can't see Tess taking it well

 

[NoReturn]

The results

Spoiler: NSFW tattoo

It's so trashy, holy shit.

Bonus content: cow crossover

t:

If case you missed it, Tess is the last comment.

 

[YouGuysAren'tThatSmart]

More dumb fucking tattoos.

 

[Simon]

The results
View attachment 3740561

Spoiler: NSFW tattoo

View attachment 3740562
It's so trashy, holy shit.

View attachment 3740563

Bonus content: cow crossover
View attachment 3740556t:
View attachment 3740553
If case you missed it, Tess is the last comment.

That fucking Whale movie has all the deathfats in a tizzy and then, Brendan goes on to say that he's an ally and the fatties STILL complain. You porkers don't put the fork down long enough to go see a movie, anyway, so why do you care?

 

[toilet_rainbow]

That tattoo is fucking confusing. So Betty Boop is dressed like a sheet ghost, but she's also naked enough that you can see her tits and belly button like as if she was not covered (versus your typical erect nipple through shirt). Utter trash either way. Great thing for a Mom to have on her body! (I know she doesn't give a shit about Bowie. Still. This is so not something a normal mother would get stabbed into her skin).

Semi late, but I am pretty sure Tess is the second deathfat I know of to have a Kewpie Mayo baby mascot tattoo



It's obstinately a Dirty Dancing/"nobody puts Baby in a corner" reference, but that is the motherfuckin' Kewpie Mayo mascot and you cannot tell me otherwise

 

[Umaibae]

Kewpie dolls are American from the early 1900s and predate the company using the baby to sell mayo by quite a bit.

 

[toilet_rainbow]

Kewpie dolls are American from the early 1900s and predate the company using the baby to sell mayo by quite a bit.

You're correct. Kewpie does do the occasional anime collab (I remember a Sailor Moon one a couple years ago) plus the mayo so I've began associating it more with its Japanese pop culture impact than the OG dolls. Although you gotta admit, it's funnier to associate the mayo with deathfats.

 

[Gay Mouth]

The Whale is getting a lot of buzz as it’s fat Brendan Fraser in a fat suit playing (I surmise from what I’ve read) a deathfat trying to reconnect with his daughter after abandoning his family to be gay. It’s probably a good, nuanced and intriguing film that takes an honest look at how disgusting being that deathly fat is, with a slant of empathy and compassion. I say probably because no one has seen it yet, but just the fact that it is about a deathfat is a topic of great controversy among the terminally offended. It’s enraging fatties because anything but saccharine lies about how normal, desirable and functional it is to be an Escalade throws them into heaving furies of embarrassed realization that they are pitied at best, abhorred at worst. Tess didn’t do her homework after her 9 pm backwood and foolishly misread Fraser’s well intentioned press triage as the opinion du jour- oops! Silly Mississip’ Ry-Ann, you’re supposed to be Very Mad & Offended that a mere obese is speaking for the super-mega-ultra-obese.

 

[Gramlol]

The results
View attachment 3740561

Spoiler: NSFW tattoo

View attachment 3740562
It's so trashy, holy shit.

View attachment 3740563

Bonus content: cow crossover
View attachment 3740556t:
View attachment 3740553
If case you missed it, Tess is the last comment.

Eugh that tattoo is basically Tess' idea of what women are meant to be- a 2D graphically sexy smiling baby. Fuck that shit.

 

[Alpaca Autopsy Expert]

So are we all supposed to believe that this sponsor by Fupa, or whatever it’s called, is paying all her bills? Don’t her followers wonder how she’s financially getting by?

 

[Ginger_beer]

I am also confused by the Betty Boop tattoo. Is it meant to imply that the naked figure is drawn on the sheet, or is it mean to be sheer so the viewer sees the girl underneath? That doesn't work because she's shown as reddish where she's not covered. Or is it supposed to be some sort of X-ray/see through magical sheet that lets the viewer see the girl -- possibly through clothing she's wearing under the sheet? Any way about it doesn't make sense.

I suspect I've probably expended more thought on that tattoo than Tess, and she's the one wearing it now. Whatever the mechanics of the sheet it's vulgar, which I know is Tess' style, but now she's carrying yet another clearly visible marker of that. I suppose she better hurry and finish getting just as many tattoos as her heart desires even if it means less money for cake, because she won't have long to enjoy them.

 

[NoReturn]

So are we all supposed to believe that this sponsor by Fupa, or whatever it’s called, is paying all her bills? Don’t her followers wonder how she’s financially getting by?

My friend, please allow me to tell you some secrets about the lower-class psyche.

First, we have those in poverty who look up to "celebrities" and just see them as "rich". "Rich" is a nebulous concept, it's a thing you are. For people in this first category, "rich people" just have money. There's no point in thinking about where that money comes from or how much there is of it. If someone is on TV they must be "rich" and they must have money available.

Second, we have those who understand money has to come from somewhere, but they don't know how much celebrities actually make. They think one hit, one ad campaign or movie or whatever is enough to "make it". So if you have ever gotten to Tess' level of fame, then it's like you won the lotto.

Finally, we have the group of people in poverty who understand money a bit better than their peers. People in this group would assume Tess spent her superwaddle money on things like an investment portfolio or properties or some other shit, and that she doesn't "Need" to work. Tess is financially secure, and chooses to do sponsorships for "more money".

 

[Gay Mouth]

My friend, please allow me to tell you some secrets about the lower-class psyche.

First, we have those in poverty who look up to "celebrities" and just see them as "rich". "Rich" is a nebulous concept, it's a thing you are. For people in this first category, "rich people" just have money. There's no point in thinking about where that money comes from or how much there is of it. If someone is on TV they must be "rich" and they must have money available.

Second, we have those who understand money has to come from somewhere, but they don't know how much celebrities actually make. They think one hit, one ad campaign or movie or whatever is enough to "make it". So if you have ever gotten to Tess' level of fame, then it's like you won the lotto.

Finally, we have the group of people in poverty who understand money a bit better than their peers. People in this group would assume Tess spent her superwaddle money on things like an investment portfolio or properties or some other shit, and that she doesn't "Need" to work. Tess is financially secure, and chooses to do sponsorships for "more money".

What’s fascinating is that Tess is a true white trash success story. Even if she’s spent the last 10 years swallowing cum to afford swallowing cake, she did it in Los Angeles. That’s a lot better than skinny Becky from the Walmart high school in Mississippi. She is literally a big fat poverty ridden trailer mammy, it’s in her blood to accidentally get pregnant, never get along with a child’s father, and always prioritize being a stinking glutton over reputation, stability or kindness. She could literally lose her last John and Tula subscription freebee and be truly forced to move back home to the trailer- she still GAWT SEEN IN THEM PITCHERS.

 

[Simon]

What’s fascinating is that Tess is a true white trash success story. Even if she’s spent the last 10 years swallowing cum to afford swallowing cake, she did it in Los Angeles. That’s a lot better than skinny Becky from the Walmart high school in Mississippi. She is literally a big fat poverty ridden trailer mammy, it’s in her blood to accidentally get pregnant, never get along with a child’s father, and always prioritize being a stinking glutton over reputation, stability or kindness. She could literally lose her last John and Tula subscription freebee and be truly forced to move back home to the trailer- she still GAWT SEEN IN THEM PITCHERS.

Exactly. No matter how shitty her life is, now, back home she will always be seen as a Hollywood success story.

 

[TheGoodNamesHaveBeenTaken]

What’s fascinating is that Tess is a true white trash success story. Even if she’s spent the last 10 years swallowing cum to afford swallowing cake, she did it in Los Angeles. That’s a lot better than skinny Becky from the Walmart high school in Mississippi. She is literally a big fat poverty ridden trailer mammy, it’s in her blood to accidentally get pregnant, never get along with a child’s father, and always prioritize being a stinking glutton over reputation, stability or kindness. She could literally lose her last John and Tula subscription freebee and be truly forced to move back home to the trailer- she still GAWT SEEN IN THEM PITCHERS.

I disagree.
Skinny Becky will most likely live to see her kids graduate, has a nice nest egg (Walmart matches 401k contributions up to somthing like 5%, at least they used to) can get up from a kneeling position unassisted and probably has all her minor children living in her home. Even if that home is a single wide trailer her and her kids are better off than Tess and her children.

 

[NoReturn]