0:00 Opening title card with November 27 2022 on it. The timeline is behind, as per usual.
0:04 HamHock greets us a good morning, in her bathroom, looking haggard and greasy as ever. Tells us she just woke up,
of course.
0:15 Says she wants to come on here and tell us what she's thinking about (oh boy) and that she feels
so hopeful and has a wave of positivity running through her.
0:28 Hammy informs us, with the utmost smug expression, that she is getting new insurance that is going to "make it to where she could possibly get weight loss surgery."
BITCH, you've been able to afford weight loss surgery! But the fucking DoorDash, Jordans, and Legos are more important than WLS to you, huh, Hamber? Give me a fucking break! We all know this is never going to happen anyway.
0:43 Says she feels like 2023 might be amazing for her. LOL.
She says she can feel it! I have a hard time believing you can feel anything under that 500 lbs of lard, but whatever you say, fatty.
0:52 She talks about how 2022 was a rough year for her and her health, followed by sperging about having to be an advocate for herself.
Claims she didn't realize how much she truly cares for herself until this year. She says these things like she wants us to believe that she's some sort of wholesome, happy-go-lucky hog. It is utterly obnoxious.
1:00 Starts rambling about the lung situation type deal and "battling for herself" made her realize how much she cares and wants to be better. Right. It wasn't cancer or being bedbound, it's the lung thing. In true LoogieLynn fashion. Goes on to sperg about her "eating disorder" and how much she wants WLS.
1:55 Says she's tired of gaining weight/maintaining, refers to the hundred days of weighing in and her being over maintaining weight. If only there was something you could do besides intuitive eating,
OH THE HUMANITY!!! Oh, wait... I guess you could binge.
2:20 Says she's ready to take the step of WLS and talks some more about the insurance she chose, not missing a chance to flex her cash by talking about it being a lot more pricey than whatever the fuck she's doing now. Oh boo-fucking-hoo, Hamber. This isn't going to happen, but even if it were,
you get to pay your way out of the hole
you ate
yourself into.
YOU DID THAT! 
Not a single soul on this earth pities you for that, nor do they sympathize with however much you're having to pay out the ass to repair the damage you've done to yourself.
2:31 Says she already knows what surgeon she wants to see and is hoping and crossing her fingers that she gets approved for this insurance. Goes on to say that she feels like
the universe might be colliding with her. LOL. Lmao, even. The jokes write themselves.
2:54 Hammy says that she knows that if she's fighting for herself and fighting to do this,
there's no possible way that it's not going to happen. Your track record would beg to differ, now wouldn't it, Hammy? As if you've ever fought for a single (non-food related) thing in your whole entire fucking life.
3:06 Says she hates when people say everything is possible because that's not true... for instance, Hamber claims she can't jump off a building! You
sure about that, fatty?
3:30 Still going on about the possibility of WLS and her weight gain, admits she's fat as fuck, lol.
4:06 Claims she has NEVER wanted it this bad... EVER. We're still in the bathroom, by the way. In case you were wondering. Says that if she's willing to change her insurance to pay more monthly then "you know she wants it." No, HamHock. I would know you wanted it if you put forth any sort of effort into changing your lazy, pathetic lifestyle. GTFO.
4:21 Says she wants to share this journey with us
and that, come 2023, she wants to upload every other day and film a lot more. Has the audacity to say that it will be a lot more content for us. Nontent, she meant, I'm sure of it.
4:45 Repeating herself, still in the bathroom. God, she looks like shit.
5:05 Says that from now, until she sees the surgeon, she's
probably going to do Weight Watchers. Mentions that WW recently changed the program and that she just wants to try something. You've tried every single fucking thing so far,
EXCEPT for putting in effort, Hamber. Come on.
5:15 Hammy says she knows a lot of people are probably rolling their eyes... hey! Look at that! You were right about something for once!
5:40 Finally! A change of scenery! And we're looking at... what appears to be a table. Claims that a lot of people think she has massive hands, shows us Jade's hand vs her own. Yes, Jade has big ol man hands. And you have Hamburger Helper mitts. Shows us a picture of her and Jade's hands against each other.
Goes on to give herself asspats about her tiny and dainty hands.
6:33 Jumpscare to staring at Hamber. She says she hasn't vlogged since the morning and it's now night time. Clearly, her day is just getting started.
6:39 Shows us the scale. 510.8 on November 27th. Says it shocked her because she wasn't expecting that big of a gain (lol) and that tomorrow will be day one of WW, oh boy!
7:00 Rarity sighting.
7:09 Says she thinks she gets 78 WW points and talks more about them changing their program. Talks about last year's change being too difficult for her tiny pea brain to comprehend.
8:00 Still yapping about WW.
8:15 Rarity is begging for attention but Hamber can't be fucked to stop looking at her fat mug in the camera long enough to care for her pets.
8:20 Shows a screenshot of a text-to-confirm message, for those of us who "just decided to not believe her" about her psychiatrist appointment. How thoughtful of her. Says them not receiving the message is not on her and that we just want her to lie about everything because it's entertaining at this point. HamHock, we don't want you to. You just do. Shut up.
8:40 Ranting about being a liar and her shitty reputation, blaming it all on her audience, of course.
9:00 Asks
us if
we're exhausted!
Ask yourself, landwhale.
9:06 Shows a November 28 title card. Proceeds to show us some sort of keto-friendly chocolate chex mix lookin' shit... apparently it's cereal and she's about to try it. Reads off some nutrition facts for it, as if she understands anything she's saying, and reminds us once more she's on day 1 of WW. Then shows her 2% milk and her bowl on the scale to prove to us she's weighing the food. Exhilarating, truly.
9:48 Says the cereal is only 2 points for a serving and the milk is 5 points... says it like she's unsure of what she's saying. Which is believable.
10:07 Says she only needs half a serving of milk, actually. Lol, that explains the prior confusion. Shows us the food.
10:13 Shows her pulling those big ass Beats off her big ass head, looking like shit. She does acknowledge that she both looks like shit and looks like an old lady. She then goes on to try the cereal and does that god-awful rat munch thing with a sour look on her face, before rubbing her greasy snout with her greasy paw.
10:48 She clearly doesn't like it. Says it's super crunchy and comments on the aftertaste, saying she's concerned. That's probably because all of her taste buds are sodium-fried.
11:00 Blah, blah, blah. Cereal shit, reading from the package. Talks about some Special K chocolate cereal she's either having for dessert or tomorrow.
11:27 November 28 weigh-in, no scale, just notebook: 511.8 LOL the past 5 days (or so she claims it's only been 5) have been off track. You go, gorl!
11:40 Says every Monday is going to be her WW weigh-in. Does this mean no more hundred days of weighing in?
Well, that's expected.
11:50 Cuts to the old man angle, filming her multiple chins, inside her closet, yapping about vlogmas. Pulls out her Cannon camera and says she's going to go back to using it for vlogmas. Says it makes her look super pale... that's because you're sickly, Hamber. Comments on her blue lips and tongue, saying she had an Italian ice, which was 9 points.
Thank god she made sure to let us know that's why her lips are blue and it's not
just because she's a walking corpse!
12:24 Still yapping about cameras making her look pale.
12:43 Comes out of the closet, plays with the camera and uses it to record herself recording herself on her phone.
Calls it an inception moment. I think we're back in the bathroom, by the way.
13:10 Staring at herself in the cameras.
13:30 Switches over to the Cannon footage and JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, that volume difference!
13:40 Literally showing the same exact clip she just showed, but
this time, from Cannon footage! Excitement. And GODDAMN she's loud.
14:04 Talks about how using a camera is much harder than using a phone... lol. Showing lots of horrifying angles of herself. Makes some ugly ass expressions before saying
maybe she needs a new camera.
14:22 Time for random comment of the day, from her Thanksgiving dinner video... it is from one
lynn jackson who says "Why even weigh in? What's the point?" She thanked them for the comment before explaining that she likes to weigh in because her goal is to lose weight but she is very curious about her fluctuations... blah blah blah. Same bullshit as always.
15:21 "Thanks for watching" card.
Thank god that's over!
and not one scratch anywhere. 
"Amber, with your ring light so bright, won't you guide my hatchback tonight?"
