Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

Are you looking forward to seeing Jade's face on camera?

  • Yes

    Votes: 555 15.7%
  • No

    Votes: 349 9.9%
  • I don't care

    Votes: 2,637 74.5%

  • Total voters
    3,541
So if you click the following image you can see how bad her views have hit. I personally think people are tired of Jade like really tired of Jade, she is so central to Amber's content yet contributes actually nothing. I think also it is actually cringing content, and if you look at anything that is cringing interest deteriorates over time as it is cringing, and it makes you feel uncomfortable.

Vlogmas has come to a lucky point as we have established she needs more than 1 million views to break even. She has managed to stick to a million since October by click baiting every single video. The problem is that it is having a negative effect finally because it exacts buyer's remorse.

In Youtube, there is a cardinal law that out of vogue channels cannot do and that is clickbait, it will hurt your channel more than benefit it. Look at people like Ali-A, Shane, and James Charles now they are actually struggling.

Since Jen died and Chantal grew boring people are starting to leave Gorlworld because it is a boring lolcow sphere. It is very slow and with Amber not doing anything and the community's disdain for Jade. People are going elsewhere but she did this all to herself.
Ouch, even "I'M GETTING WLS" only garnered her a couple thousand more views than her normal range, that must sting. Hopefully she realizes soon that she needs to do something interesting, unlike Chantal, I don't think she's willing to throw herself away financially to present well online.

Again looking at her social blade and assuming she doesn't have another source of income, she's making about $3,000 after tax a month (and that's being generous). I don't remember what was the consensus on which Henry floorplan she lives in, but it's pretty obvious that 3 job having wifey is the only reason she's able to continue to live in relative comfort.
 
I’m watching her new fucking vlog. I can’t say how much I hate this stupid opening where she just laughs over basic bitch title cards.

She thinks she’s a public figure. Lol check yo stats gorl.

She’s low key defending Casey Anthony. Get bent.

Is anyone else tired of watching a 30 something woman play with play dough at a kindergarten level?

She’s so grateful for the subscriber who sent her an advent calendar that she can’t name them.

Big shock, Wasabi doesn’t even get a try with the toy.

Also the amount that these bitches say ‘baby’ makes me want to throw shit.

“I got a hand salve! I bet it’s for your hands.”

Eye twitch.

Amber doesn’t understand what a side salad is. They aren’t supposed to be that small!

She has allergies and googles what allergies are and makes us read them cuz we’re as stupid as she is.

She hasn’t been sick at ALL since Jade came, guys. Not once. Ignore the other videos.

In target and shoots a full body shot of her pushing her cart. To prove she doesn’t use a scooter!!!!!

Why does she have to touch EVERYTHING in the store.

Someone recognized her in the store. SHE’S A PUBLIC FIGURE.

It’s so weird how red looks like orange sometimes, gorls. She’s also trying out clickbait thumbnails. Thank you for not editing that out.

A new purse…even though she wasn’t even using a purse in Target. If you don’t use a purse for shopping….why do???

Baby. Baby. BABY.

I really wanna see her on that step stool.

This random comment picker is actually a brilliant idea. It’s for sure making more people comment trash to troll her. More comments is just another win for her, no matter what they say.

But it’s funny as hell.

Tons of Rarity, mention of Twinkie, not once a Wasabi.

Mic drop.
 
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I don't remember what was the consensus on which Henry floorplan she lives in, but it's pretty obvious that 3 job having wifey is the only reason she's able to continue to live in relative comfort.
I can't even begin to imagine the blubbering/fallout/performative minstrel show that'll definitely go down the moment Jade Francis throws in the towel. The piggy panic will be off the chain! :story:
 
I calculated last year the cost of skin removal for her.

Panniculectomy: $12,000
Lower body lift: $8,000
upper arm lift: $7,000
Breast lift: $4,000
Lymphedema/Lipedoema surgery for the legs: $25,000
Lip filler: $625

So, she should expect to pay about $56,000 for skin removal surgery. If she needs a facelift, add another $5,000. I am not sure if she could get a package discount but even if she could get 50%,it would still be at least $25k for skin removal. So, she would need $25k for WLS, $25k for skin removal and likely another $10k for incidentals. So, a grand total of $60k. This is not happening.

Meanwhile, back to the ranch, Amber buys another Lego set...
According to Hamber she doesn’t have a fupa nor the balls that come with it so in her ‘books is good for the brain’ thinking she’ll see that as $12,000 less. Thx for the breakdown btw
 
Today is Vlogmas Day 4, December 3rd in the Amberverse. Lot's of shrieky molments in the beginning. Be careful if you are using headphones. Basically, she spends the video showing us stuff she's bought, arguing with her audience rather than acknowledging she's wrong, and making a spectacle of herself for views - just a day that ends in a y.


-- VLOGMAS 2022 --

Location: Sitting at her desk.
Amber's face is starting to get that hexagon shape again. Dramatic makeup, so bear with her. Unboxing of an Amazon delivery. It's a container to store the gift wrap, which is good because Amber has a lot of gift wrap. So cool.

Location: Standing in the living room.
We get to watch them move the wrapping paper from a large cardboard box to this large vinyl storage bag. Rarity does an odour check of the paper; Twinkie supervises Rarity; Amber points with her balloon hand; Jade actually moves the rolls... TEAMWORK!! Jade relies on her hat to protect her identity - though we all know who she is.

Jade's turn to open a present. It's some viral TikTok garbage. A hoola hoop thing to help you lose weight. Of course Amber would fall for some gimicky shit like this. Amber declares the diameter to be so large that it could fit around her (nope - it's only 58"). Twinkie freaks the fuck out over something.

Jade is demonstrating this. She's eliminated some links so she can wear it tightly around her hips, and it has a clip with a cord dangling from it. The cord has a teardrop shaped weight hanging from it. You swing your hips like using a hoola hoop, but the device stays in place while the weight pulls clip around the outer track by the cord. Great item to use right beside the television, Jade. The device scares the ABSOLUTE FUCK out of Rarity and she runs for it. Oh yeah, and Amber starts rambling about her slippers and there is a hoof sighting if you're into that sort of thing. Amber has a weird thing against thick shoes after her fall - I guess people's guess about her losing sensation in her feet is true. Now thicker shoes cause her anxiety.

JUMP CUT!!! AMBER CAN'T BREATHE!!! SHE'S DYING!! Beginner tip for aspiring medics/first responders: if your patient screams that they can't breathe, they can breathe. Camera pans out and Amber is wearing the hoop thing. It's stuck just under her boobs and she can't get it off. I'd like to remind everyone that the box was clearly labelled as this being a 58 INCH device. Also keep in mind that Amber is a drama-whore and could have removed a couple of links in order to get herself stuck. (And AGAIN, she accuses US of dehumanizing HER). "Obviously I'm too fat for it. But I want to try one little swirl". What a fucking shitshow. "It's not on my hips, so I look stupid as hell". Now, now, Amber, don't blame the plastic hoop for you looking stupid. Headphone users beware if you want to watch this.

Amber has only just realized 10 minutes into the video that this shrieking and flapping around is frightening her cat. What an amazing fur-momma!

Kitty Cat Advent Calendar. It's a plastic ball with a bell in it. Rarity bats it around and starts kicking it with her back feet.

Play-Doh Advent Calendar. Tiny tub of orange play-doh and a candy cane stamp. Amber makes a play-doh candy cane.

Mini Fashion Brands Unboxing: A tiny purse, and tiny sunglasses. Amber has found a new addiction. The purse is real material, too! People say that Amber is age regressing, but she doesn't care. That is quite obvious. Amber plays with the toys on camera. Amber practically "O's" on camera when she discovers that her teeny purse has teeny toy makeup and a teeny lotion container inside of it.

Location: Standing in the kitchen.
Weight Watchers Snacks Unboxing/Haul: If Amber is going to be successful with losing weight and with her eating disorder, she needs to give into her food addiction, or else she'll give in to her food addiction (I'm paraphrasing, but that's how I interpreted this nonsense regarding balancing her food addiction and 'BED').

Chocolate pretzel bars, sour cream and onion crunchy thins (free because she bought so much shit), salt and vinegar potato chips, mac and cheese potato sticks, peanut butter pie bars, mint cookie crunch bars, chocolate caramel snack bars, sea salt hummus crisps, iced chocolate puffs, nutter butter bites, and a CASE of Peatos crunchy onion rings. Basically, all of the same stuff she got the LAST time she failed Weight Watchers and needed some approved snacks.

Did you know that fruts and vegetables are 0 points on the Weight Watchers diet? That totally won't work for Amber if she's to hit her goal of 78 points per day (plus her 49 weekly points every day). She'll need lots of snacks for that. GOALS!

Location: Sitting on the couch.
Amber ordered banana ice cream with whipped cream on top. Taste test!! "This place makes their ice cream... literally there". Thanks, Captain Obvious. Creepy eye-contact with the camera while she takes a hit. OMG it's REAL BANANA! "Babe" needs to try it (with the same spoon so Jade gets a sprinkling of tonsil stone with the ice cream).

Location: Standing in the bathroom.
4 hours later. Amber just woke up from a nap. She's seen people about her sleep and sleep medication is not advised with her meds. Again, nothing is *wrong* with her sleep - she chooses to sleep all day and stay up all night. That's not 'insomnia', that's 'stay-awake-while-the-house-sleeps-so-you-can-binge-in-peace'.

They were supposed to go to a Christmas Parade, but Twinkie has been acting weird and anxious and Amber couldn't leave her alone.

Amber is now setting the Haydurz straight. They've pointed out that Amber says she never gets sick, but she just had pneumonia. Amber says that doesn't count, because she got pneumonia from being 'bed readen' (bed-ridden) from tearing ligaments and that can happen to anyone. Her sudden lack of movement after getting injured lead to pneumonia (even though just before it happened she was talking about how inactive she was already being, and Jade pushed her to go on that walk). One, no. Getting a joint injury does not mean you will get an infection in your lungs. Two, you were still sick, Amber.

Weight Loss Surgery Update: On Monday, she's going to call and schedule an appointment for a consultation. Two different surgeries are offered: one for 16k, and one for 23k, and she wants to know exactly which one she should get. She needs to know what she has to do, NOW. I can help you with this, Amber. They will want you to do THE EXACT SAME THINGS THE OTHER 3 WEIGHT LOSS DOCTORS WANTED YOU TO DO. This includes following a restrictive, lower calorie diet, and getting EFFECTIVE treatment for your overeating so you don't explode your stomach with food and die the molment you feel an emotion or watch a video of someone eating chips.

Jade wants to help Amber save up for the surgery. Let's see how long this goes on for where Jade has to work multiple jobs to save thousands for Amber, while Amber eat cases of chocolate caramel bars and chips, and spends her money on toys and purses.

YouTube Random Comment Picker.
heather jarrell says "These comments though. Some of y'all say the exact same positive thing. A lot of missing comments as well"
Amber thanks Heather for the comment, but doesn't understand what Heather is saying. Amber doesn't delete comments, has never been one to delete comments - except she has admitted in the past to getting her friends to go through her comments to delete the unsavory ones.

Outro.

-- VLOGMAS 2022 --

TL;DR: Materialistic bullshit. Flapping around like a moron with a 58" hoop stuck around her braline. Orders a CRATE full of WW snacks. Cat and Play-Doh Advent Calendars. Amber will call the weight loss surgeon on Monday because she needs to know what she should be doing. Jade is going to help save money for Amber's surgery.
 
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After seeing the recent pictures of her walking, with those huge marshmallow legs, I'm surprised she hasn't started wearing only ankle length dresses, with her leggins underneath still of course.
Her "shirts" are knee length dresses, and the largest torrid has on offer. She cant GET anything that would reach her ankles.
 
Her "shirts" are knee length dresses, and the largest torrid has on offer. She cant GET anything that would reach her ankles.
A shame Omar the Tent Maker doesn't have an online website. She's destined to Homer Simpson muu-muu's in the very near future.
 
Her makeup is DRAMATIC you guys. She’s dramatic. Deal with it.

She buys so many things on Amazon she can’t remember what it is. But it can’t be a present for someone else so let’s open this mystery shit on camera! It’s…wrapping paper accessories, y’all. WRAPPING PAPER ACCESSORIES. I hate everything. She talks about wrapping paper forever. For a bitch who has continuously for YEARS gone on and on about how baaaad she is at wrapping she sure spends a billion minutes talking about it.

I gotta say, this has to be the stupidest use of money I’ve fucking seen. An organizer and storage for your stupid rolls of colored paper that cost $2, are just left over scraps, and will be replaced next year for a new pattern anyway. Just THROW EM AWAY.

Shouldn’t have been so quick to react, it actually ended great. She bought that organizer to get the wrapping paper out of the Christmas tree box she was storing them in, only to put the organizer in the Christmas tree box. Lol

That was worth the entire video.
We got almost a full body shot of Jade as she sat on the couch. I’m more convinced than ever that she’s a tranny.
She bought some plastic hoop that sits on your stomach and makes you lose weight? BUT TIKTOK TOLD HER IT WOULD WORK.

Twinkie avoids eye contact with her. Haha

We got an extended crotch shot of Jade. Now I’m not sure about the tranny thing. No bludge at all, but could be micropenis.

I was busy thinking about micropenises and got lost during some kind of Amazon rant Amber was on.
She put the ring on her fat. She is convinced she will lose weight. She squeals and shakes her body. I’m reviewing this at work and would rather go back to work. I’m spending more time thinking about the meeting email I’m avoiding instead of this content. Even this fatty shaking is boring me.

Rarity is cute playing with toy. Wasabi is red headed step child.

God, the play doh is back. She fails to make a candy cane with a fucking mold.

I refuse to give her mini brands bullshit my time. Skip. But not before some BABY BABY BABY talk.

She’s doing a haul of weight watchers snacks. Dear Christ almighty.

I’m now putting together my meeting email as that’s more interesting. She goes into how the WW snacks are low calorie. No shit.
She doordashed ice cream. I won’t even doordash French fries cuz they’re limp and lifeless when I get them. Her ice cream is meltly and gross. She said it’s bomb. She CONSTANTLY TRIES TO FEED JADE AND IT DRIVES ME CRAZY. WHY DOES SHE HAVE TO TRY EVERY DAMN THING THAT GOES IN YOUR MOUTH.

Got mad on the internet there.

She had ‘walking pneumonia’ when she was bedridden. Hahahahaha

Something about a weight loss surgery that will never happen. She fights with Jade but doesn’t film it.
Comment of the day called her out for pushing fake positive comments on her videos while deleting actual ones but she was too dumb to get it.

Thank god it’s over.
 
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