Indiana Jones & the Dial of Destiny - Using time travel to literally retcon the series

[WhiskeyJack]

Disney did this with Pirates of the Caribbean as well. They looted the unused script for the Monkey Island movie and the plots and jokes from the first three games and basically franchised it under a different name. Acting like all of their stories and characters came from a ride attraction with mute puppets and not a fully fledged and written videogame series. If they did a faithful Monkey Island movie now the response would be "wow what a Pirates ripoff!".

At least Monkey Island was inspired by the ride, originally. So it's sort of fitting. Though I'd have loved to see a proper Guybrush Threepwood in theaters when I was a kid.

It all sort of reminds me of how Jar Jar Abrams stole ideas from the Myst game for his LOST show, including half the title. And from what I've heard, much the same was done with that abysmal "Rings of Power" show, ripping off some unused script for a Dragon Age show Amazon were reportedly working on ages ago. Abrams was involved with that too; I wonder if he has anything to do with this Indiana Jones abomination?

 

[XYZpdq Jr.]

Also Disney making a movie where a Nazi working for the US in the space race is the villain is funny to me given their relationship with Wernher von Braun.

They say you should write what you know

 

[HandsomeDan]

What just occurred to me is this dumb name for this film is strangely close to a name that if used with one word changed could have made a very interesting Jones film - "The Spear of Destiny". For those that dont know what this is, the Spear of Destiny is the spear that was thrust into the side of Christ by the Roman soldier during his crucifixion. As the spear came in contact with the Blood of Christ it was said to hole immense power and was passed down through Kings. Hitler was very interested in it and is supposed to have taken possession of it in Austria.

This subject manner would have followed the three original films as having the central relic be religious in nature and containing the Power of God. Indy while not being religious himself always showed a great respect for the Power of God in these objects. This is a reason why crystal skulls failed as well and while this new film will fail even more, the mystery of the Power of God and what happens when evil tries to control it is missing.

They would never have a Christian relic be the focus of a film now of course, but the new name is so dumb, that I would not be shocked if we found out the original plot was in fact about the Spear of Destiny and when they changed to time travel they lazily just changed one word of the title to make it work.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

What just occurred to me is this dumb name for this film is strangely close to a name that if used with one word changed could have made a very interesting Jones film - "The Spear of Destiny". For those that dont know what this is, the Spear of Destiny is the spear that was thrust into the side of Christ by the Roman soldier during his crucifixion. As the spear came in contact with the Blood of Christ it was said to hole immense power and was passed down through Kings. Hitler was very interested in it and is supposed to have taken possession of it in Austria.

This subject manner would have followed the three original films as having the central relic be religious in nature and containing the Power of God. Indy while not being religious himself always showed a great respect for the Power of God in these objects. This is a reason why crystal skulls failed as well and while this new film will fail even more, the mystery of the Power of God and what happens when evil tries to control it is missing.

They would never have a Christian relic be the focus of a film now of course, but the new name is so dumb, that I would not be shocked if we found out the original plot was in fact about the Spear of Destiny and when they changed to time travel they lazily just changed one word of the title to make it work.

Fuck the Spear of Destiny would've been so much cooler, it sucks that this and the last Indy film are really just focusing on science fiction bullshit.

 

[Monolith]

The problem fans have is that they are replacing an established and beloved character with an unlikeable cunt, besides we already have a "female Indiana Jones" and her name is Lara Croft... a character that has also been fucked up by current year faggotry

Didn't they make her tits smaller?

 

[The tired cat]

It's seething at Russia, not communism, and the USSR is still associated more with communism than Russia. Honestly I'd find the movie more ballsy if the Nazi genuinely turns out to be a good guy that's remorseful and Indy learns to accept that things have changed, but that's a little too interesting for modern movies.

Pfffr..A Nazi being remorseful, unless they were the sad Wermacht bastards from the Eastern Front, every fuckin kraut that the yanks pulled out (including some SS fuckers) were hardcore in their views and believes even until they died or got gutted by Nazi hunters.

 

[mindlessobserver]

What just occurred to me is this dumb name for this film is strangely close to a name that if used with one word changed could have made a very interesting Jones film - "The Spear of Destiny". For those that dont know what this is, the Spear of Destiny is the spear that was thrust into the side of Christ by the Roman soldier during his crucifixion. As the spear came in contact with the Blood of Christ it was said to hole immense power and was passed down through Kings. Hitler was very interested in it and is supposed to have taken possession of it in Austria.

This subject manner would have followed the three original films as having the central relic be religious in nature and containing the Power of God. Indy while not being religious himself always showed a great respect for the Power of God in these objects. This is a reason why crystal skulls failed as well and while this new film will fail even more, the mystery of the Power of God and what happens when evil tries to control it is missing.

They would never have a Christian relic be the focus of a film now of course, but the new name is so dumb, that I would not be shocked if we found out the original plot was in fact about the Spear of Destiny and when they changed to time travel they lazily just changed one word of the title to make it work.

I've always thought the Staff of Moses would also make a great Indiana Jones adventure. In Exodus, when Moses dies, God literally takes Moses' body and buries it himself. Imagine Jones trying to find a tomb built by God himself!

Also imagine the climactic scene. Indy is running from the big bad with the sraff in one hand and the love interest in the other and they come up to a body of water. Trapped! He looks out at the water, exhausted desperation on his face. Looks down at the staff. "Noooo..." he mutters exasperated. Looks back, bad guys getting closer. Looks back at the water and slowly raises the staff....

Shit. If I can do this why is it so God damn hard for Hollywood?

 

[Krokodil Overdose]

Fuck the Spear of Destiny would've been so much cooler, it sucks that this and the last Indy film are really just focusing on science fiction bullshit.

They used the Spear of Destiny in the first Hellboy movie, though, and you run into the same problem as the Ark of the Covenant: he had to lose it by the end so the whole thing is destined to be a shaggy dog story.

If there must be more Indy, I think going outside the Bible would be good just to mix it up. How about finding Excalibur, or Gae Bolg, or Ra's solar barge? There's a ton of mythological artifacts not directly tied to God Himself. Instead they're reduced to OC Donut Steel artifacts that they made up.

 

[Adamska]

They used the Spear of Destiny in the first Hellboy movie, though, and you run into the same problem as the Ark of the Covenant: he had to lose it by the end so the whole thing is destined to be a shaggy dog story.

If there must be more Indy, I think going outside the Bible would be good just to mix it up. How about finding Excalibur, or Gae Bolg, or Ra's solar barge? There's a ton of mythological artifacts not directly tied to God Himself. Instead they're reduced to OC Donut Steel artifacts that they made up.

Two ideas I had a good while back were that he is out to search for Genghis Khan's Peace Soul and has to tiptoe around collapsing Sino-Soviet relations to pull it off, and another where he searches for the Sword of Ali, the legendary sword wielded by the nephew of Muhammad that still remains unfound, racing against other less scrupulous treasure hunters hired by a variety of interests.

It actually takes a pretty impressive mix of ignorance, incompetence, and poor management and arrogance to not be able to come up with anything good at all for a plot.

 

[khaine]

Or he could have been searching for the sword of mars[1]. There are so many cool artifacts lost to time they could have used. Why make up something so stupid?

[1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sword_of_Attila

 

[Uranus Pink]

Didn't they make her tits smaller?

They did and and untrooned out femboys could accurately cosplayed as her. Afaik none of them ever did cause why bother when they along everyone else rather cosplayed as the OG games and/or the Angelina Jolie big tiddie versions.

 

[HeyYou]

Pfffr..A Nazi being remorseful, unless they were the sad Wermacht bastards from the Eastern Front, every fuckin kraut that the yanks pulled out (including some SS fuckers) were hardcore in their views and believes even until they died or got gutted by Nazi hunters.

Wernher von Braun was and that's straight up who the character is based on.

 

[The tired cat]

Wernher von Braun was and that's straight up who the character is based on.

Uh-huh, sure he was. The fucker was part of the SS and those POS never regretted anything, no matter how much they claim they did.

 

[ArthuriusMartyrius]

Ford must owe an apocalytical amount of money to the IRS, that's the only reason I can see for him doing these nostalgia roles at his age.
Clint Eastwood I understand, he directs and produces the stuff he is in so he has a bit of control, Ford is just rolled out as a seal to clap at command for a fish or two.
Doing that at the end of your life instead of spending it with family and friends seems just empty to me, no matter how big the paycheck is.

Also Disney making a movie where a Nazi working for the US in the space race is the villain is funny to me given their relationship with Wernher von Braun.

Even when he was alive, Wernher Von Braun wasn't particularly liked by his US coworkers and more "tolerated". Plus there are rumors that ex-Nazis like him and Leni Riefenstahl were both committed to the end and just hid their power levels though supposedly there's an interview of Riefenstahl towards the end of her life floating around where she stopped giving a fuck and openly defended the Nazis as not that bad.

 

[Manwithn0n0men]

They used the Spear of Destiny in the first Hellboy movie, though, and you run into the same problem as the Ark of the Covenant: he had to lose it by the end so the whole thing is destined to be a shaggy dog story.

If there must be more Indy, I think going outside the Bible would be good just to mix it up. How about finding Excalibur, or Gae Bolg, or Ra's solar barge? There's a ton of mythological artifacts not directly tied to God Himself. Instead they're reduced to OC Donut Steel artifacts that they made up.

It was also featured in Constantine

 

[The tired cat]

Even when he was alive, Wernher Von Braun wasn't particularly liked by his US coworkers and more "tolerated". Plus there are rumors that ex-Nazis like him and Leni Riefenstahl were both committed to the end and just hid their power levels though supposedly there's an interview of Riefenstahl towards the end of her life floating around where she stopped giving a fuck and openly defended the Nazis as not that bad.

Again, dude was part of the SS, an like every other SS fuck that the yanks pulled out, those guys were hardcore into their views. Some just were open about it, knowing the CIA had their back (like Adolf Eichmann or the one fucker they made the ambassador of West Germany or the one guy who went hunting fo Che Guevara), while others sort off tried to hide it because they knew that Nazi Hunters still wanted a piece of them.

 

[HeyYou]

Even when he was alive, Wernher Von Braun wasn't particularly liked by his US coworkers and more "tolerated". Plus there are rumors that ex-Nazis like him and Leni Riefenstahl were both committed to the end and just hid their power levels though supposedly there's an interview of Riefenstahl towards the end of her life floating around where she stopped giving a fuck and openly defended the Nazis as not that bad.

Considering most of his regret was after his religious conversion, towards the end of his life, and expressed in letters he probably figured would never be seen, that strikes me as particularly unlikely.

 

[Krokodil Overdose]

And this is why [current year] movies should not involve Nazis in any capacity: because clown world is so retarded that the slightest mention of them must be followed by a diatribe about how bad they were and how only evil subhuman scum could belong to a political party that you were legally obligated to join.

 

[Manwithn0n0men]

And this is why [current year] movies should not involve Nazis in any capacity: because clown world is so retarded that the slightest mention of them must be followed by a diatribe about how bad they were and how only evil subhuman scum could belong to a political party that you were legally obligated to join.

If I could be dictator of all fiction I would ban the use of new Nazi related Fiction until the Children of the WW2 Generation are all dead ( about 25-30 years )

 

[Krokodil Overdose]

If I could be dictator of all fiction I would ban the use of new Nazi related Fiction until the Children of the WW2 Generation are all dead ( about 25-30 years )

You'd need to combine that with a final solution to for all Nazi related fiction since about 1975. Like slavery, the moral hysteria has gotten worse and worse as time goes by because the regime is brazenly corrupt and incompetent and needs to justify itself with increasingly messianic interpretations of history.

Maybe a movie about an adventurer archaeologist should center on adventures related to archaeology, not European politics from 80 years ago.