Another (vlogmas) day in the Amberverse. What's on today's activity sheet? Making plans to go ride around, looking at xmas light displays? Hot cocoa and a stroll through the shopping district? Perhaps a getaway to a cabin with a fireplace for a couple of days, communing with nature and appreciating that we even exist? Ha! Sucker! NO!
All right then, Hamber, put your best non-dangleen foot forward and let's get your latest shitty installment over with.
She cannot believe it's day 19! Kind of like the moon landing, eh, Hamber?
Earrings from a subbie. STOP SENDING HER SHIT. The next time we see these, they'll be piled in a drawer with a bunch of other shitty earrings, and one will be missing as she does yet another "declutter", which to her means "making space by pitching my old junk so I can buy new junk".
She's "cryeen for joy" and immediately has to look over at her oh so supportive MG,W and ask if that's a thing. Hamber finally comes to "jumping for joy" and I can tell you THAT really ain't a thing. Not for you, anyway. Crying tears of joy, however, is, so zero points to you two retards.
Whines about her job - that vlogmas gives her some kind of reason ($$$) to vlog her mundane life, but when vlogmas is over, she doesn't have a reason any more. Great! So what job are you going to get to support yourself in the life to which you've become accustomed?
She think vlogmas is part of a "huge community" that happens on YT. Yes. A part. Of YOUTUBE. Goddamn, could you just do your privileged, terribly overpaid job without bitching about it?
Disembodied MG,W is yammering about exchanging today's gift for Ham, based on "her preferences", for some reason, and Ham being Ham, doesn't think that sounds promising. So what is this mysterious, non-preferable gift? Hey, shoutout to me! "What is this situation type deal?" It's something to further enable your slothful ways, of course. WTF else would it be? It's some weirdass pillow thing, and Ham asks why MG,W would think she wouldn't like it, to which MG,W replies "You said you like it more firm." So, firmer, then? It's like listening to a pack of third graders who don't quite have that grammar thing down yet. Hamber declares that she loves it, orders MG,W to give her a hug. Presumably not around her actual waist. You'd have to have arms like Shaq to get around that. Should have exchanged it for orange chicken. Hamber does that retarded limey wave the royals do and RARITY! Saves us! Good girl!
"It's happening again, folks. We're fuckin' with the pantry." Hamber flings the pantry door open to reveal an absolute disaster of a pantry. Did you not - recently, in fact - clean up that shit? Why yes, yes you did. Why the fuck are you two such fucking pigs when it takes zero time at all to put shit away properly once you've cleaned it. It looks like a fucking bomb went off in there. This time, Hamber is doing it on her own. Hamber waves her beetus paw at it all, asking "Whuut is this?" It's a hoard. The same as the rest of your shit.
She tries to convince us that she enjoys organizeen and cleaneen. Tells us there's a bunch of expired stuff in there. Maybe if you stopped getting so much goddamned takeout you could use the groceries you buy instead of wasting money buying food and then throwing it away.
Takes everything out to the counters. Talks about donating to the homeless shelter. Has a bunch of containers (of course), and she's going to sort it all. She's running down the first batch of junk "healthy" snacks she shoving back into the pantry. Fortunately, she isn't giving us an item by item commentary. Gets the rest of the crap they're keeping back in the pantry. She's exhausted (of course) so she's going to take a break (of course).
This is the most she's done "in awhile". Yeah, no shit, we have to watch you, and despite all your lip service to "moving more", you still sit on your fat ass all day long.
Shows off the cleaned pantry, and I swear they must have thrown out half of what was in there. By the way, Ham, you can try to hide the box of Lucky Charms that was in there with the Raisin Bran and Honey Nut Cheerios, but it's just another in the long list of things you work far too hard to conceal for no reason at all.
It's Platydoh "Avent" time. Camp crafts: she made an xmas tree with what she says is an angel on top. It's hideous.
Snacking on plantain chips. See, this would have been a perfect time for you two losers to make an actual meal with something you found in the pantry. There's spaghetti and sauce RIGHT THERE. You bought all those chicken tenderloins - again, spending money unnecessarily, as buying boneless, skinless breasts would be cheaper and better suited as a single portion size for both of your fat asses - that you could have easily used to make a quick chicken parmegiana. That would have been a good, filling meal, healthier than what you usually shove down that piehole of yours. And it wouldn't be beige.
Apologizes for the boring video. We're quite used to it, Hamber. Promises tomorrow's will be more interesting. Sure.
COTD: first picked is a reply to someone that's too far out of context. Picks another, "two thumbnails in a row!", which she doesn't understand, but thanks the person anyway, says goodbye.
vlogmas day 19
