The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch / @TenaciousRanch / Steampunk Penny / Penellope Logue / Phillip Matthew Logue - Don't cry because it ended, laugh because it's still getting worse.

[Meiwaku]

God damn that's a cute kitten. It looks a bit worried but if it's sleeping and not hiding and flopped then it's calm and feeling okay.

If it was found, likely the neighbor's have an unspayed cat that they let roam around.

I just hope they spay/neuter it and give it a nice clean piece of the floor to piss on like they did with Kevin.

 

[Single_Sock]

So the kitten is a male and, as Kevin stated, they already have many female cats.

This is no way problematic for any of them.

(How many cats does this make now, by the way? 11? How many dogs are still at the tranch?)

 

[Path Wanderer]

So they say, they found it in the field. First of all, what fucking field? Second of all, how did it make its way there? We all just saw how isolated they are.
Nonetheless, I will begin with Penny’s post announcing the poor newcomer. [A]
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Note that I said I will begin with Penny’s post, despite Kevin’s being made a few minutes earlier. That’s because it would be mean to hit you with a Kevin selfie right away. The cat, named Wisp, looks terrified in Kevin’s arms, although I may be wrong about this. Idk about cats. [A]
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The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch has to flex their animal whisperer abilities to everybody, so he was also introduced on that account. Now, I don’t want to nitpick, but Penny writes here that the cat was rescued this morning. Dear reader, if you look at the timestamps on these posts, you may notice that this was tweeted a full 24 hours after the previous ones. Either he’s lying about stupid shit or his brain is fried, and we don’t know which. [A]
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Today, we get an update on Wisp. He’s putting on weight (as does everybody in the Tranch) and he’s getting acquainted with the other felines. [A]
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And he has found the cat tree. [A]
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I need one of you spergs to enlighten us on cat behavior or something. Also, it is not lost on me the fact that most of the photos have Kevin’s toys and random messes in the background.

Additionally, this may have been covered but it made me laugh so I’m posting it anyways. [A]
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Spoiler: Pics

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That is 100% some neighbors stray housecat they just took. Someone should keep on the lookout for missing animal notices in the area

 

[AfghanBlue]

Had to dig up the video of the boys dumping their trash at the reservation; it's some of my favorite Tranch media:

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Absolute masterpiece. The wool that isn't even yarn, the Indian guy's politely baffled face, Kevin's labored breathing, "we go to Colorado once a month"

jeeeesus.

they dont want that shit. the labour that would need to go into processing that crappy wool, driving that far...how have the managed to float this long?
Driving from Edinburg to Paris.. and back.

i suppose just from the insane grift. its hillarious how they act oppressed, no one else could ever get this much money to act retarded for such a long time...

"get this on film kev'' the reason they are driving it down is so clearly so they have any reason at all to be grifting "for" this community who clearly have, nor want anything to do with them.

white saviourism, disgusting as it is, comes in dead second to the sheer greed grift, as the real reason for them doing this.

just when you think the Tranch cant disgust you any more lol.
fr i thought they actually at least had SOME actual link/close contact on the rez...fuck. they dont.
that poor guy. wait half an hour, hope alpacas wool is a good burner?

 

[Peru oso donas]

View attachment 4208422

Literally naming an Elden Ring NPC before the game existed.

I am 99% sure people started calling Jen that after the Elden ring NPC, i even remember someone doing a meme where they stuck his face on the image where the dung eater is getting hanged.

 

[Humbert Humbert]

So the kitten is a male and, as Kevin stated, they already have many female cats.

This is no way problematic for any of them.

(How many cats does this make now, by the way? 11? How many dogs are still at the tranch?)

Well, they got Gadget for a fact.
I forgot to include him in the update post, too lazy to go back and edit though.

Love the Kevin toys up behind him.

 

[AfghanBlue]

Well, they got Gadget for a fact. View attachment 4208943
I forgot to include him in the update post, too lazy to go back and edit though.

Love the Kevin toys up behind him.
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dumbassses lmao.

you can literally read thier phone number on the dogs collar/bone thing.
new detail to add to the dox.

also look at those pill bottles on front of the telly. cool, just having them around where dogs can chew through them..


032617039? i dont know what american cell no's usually look like .

 

[Winnie the Poohnani]

also look at those pill bottles on front of the telly. cool, just having them around where dogs can chew through them..

^^^This. WTF. Who the hell leaves meds out where the pets can get into them. Imagine if doggo chews open a container of estrogen and gobbles it down. Or prozac, or whatever other psych meds these mad lads have to hand.

I sometimes wonder how these dolts even remember to breathe.

 

[AirdropShitposts]

^^^This. WTF. Who the hell leaves meds out where the pets can get into them. Imagine if doggo chews open a container of estrogen and gobbles it down. Or prozac, or whatever other psych meds these mad lads have to hand.

I sometimes wonder how these dolts even remember to breathe.

We don't even need to appeal to their likely non-existent concern about the dog, imagine having to replace all your precious daily needed HRT and anti-anxiety meds on a whim!

 

[Ivan Daniloff]

We don't even need to appeal to their likely non-existent concern about the dog, imagine having to replace all your precious daily needed HRT and anti-anxiety meds on a whim!

I think you may have stumbled on the new crop the Tranch needs to make money and reduce pharma overhead: Troonshine.

 

[duckling]

Edit: just realized there are these weird things near a truck in the top left corner of the property. Any idea what they might be? Don't think they're animals as they seem to be in a grid pattern

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Wrapped hay bales

 

[Humbert Humbert]

dumbassses lmao.

you can literally read thier phone number on the dogs collar/bone thing.
new detail to add to the dox.

also look at those pill bottles on front of the telly. cool, just having them around where dogs can chew through them..
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032617039? i dont know what american cell no's usually look like .

Good catch. The tag says “Tenacious Unicorn Ranch” so I went to their website (which has apparently been redesigned) and unfortunately it is the number associated with the ranch itself.

I am on mobile most of the time, so I’m not sure if the text is obnoxiously large on other devices. I hope not because this was annoying to read.

 

[Niggerphobe]

Imagine farcry 5 but with the tranch call them tenetechs instead of peggys

 

[The Silent Perjority]

What are the three stooges going to do when they move to Penny's relatives house?

They can't grift as a Trans haven, they can't get surfs in to do the work, where's the angle?
I presume Kevin will just go on begging even without the backstory but it's hard to see how they can get any leverage.

 

[FinnSven]

What are the three stooges going to do when they move to Penny's relatives house?

They can't grift as a Trans haven, they can't get surfs in to do the work, where's the angle?
I presume Kevin will just go on begging even without the backstory but it's hard to see how they can get any leverage.

Kevvie might “restyle” himself as a content creator on twitter.

Penny will probably try to do odd jobs and the like, like he has been doing badly so far.

But yes, ultimately they will continue grifting.

 

[Oxyjen]

Kittens do “turn up” at ranches and farms all the time - people callously dump them at the roadside, especially right after Christmas.

So it could be true.

That is one damn fine looking kitten though and in good condition too, I’d say someone paid good money for it, and it wasn’t fending for itself for long. Am I bad for immediately suspecting they just bought it?

 

[AssignedEva]

That kitten looks well fed and cared for. Bollocks Penny found it, he probably bought it then lied to Kevvie and twitter in another attempt to look like a caring decent person.

I was thinking that the kitten looked very healthy and well fed (and has a gorgeous coat). My initial suspicion is that it's a neighbour's kitten that has gotten loose and then got lost, but I guess most nearby neighbours probably wouldn't have pet cats but instead farm cats.

From my limited experience of farm cats, they tend not to be quite as tame or as well cared for (and they don't tend to get lost) but I guess on the latter point this is an orange cat, and they always seem to be the dumbest type of cat.

Buying the kitten is probably the most likely answer, though, especially since he looks about the right age to be weaned. Which is incredibly stupid because why would you buy a kitten if you're currently plotting an exit strategy to your family's farm and are going to be dealing with the hassle of moving and are strapped for cash? Wait, duh, probably to cheer up Kevin about the impending Trail of Queers. It's hard to be sad when you're playing with a kitten

So how do these idiots manage to kill this poor kitten?

If that's actually a feral kitten that just turned up, they've probably just introduced their existing pet cats to a bunch of parasites and diseases.

 

[FinnSven]

jeeeesus.

they dont want that shit. the labour that would need to go into processing that crap, driving that far...how have the managed to float this long?

i suppose just from the insane grift. its hillarious how they act oppressed, no one else could ever get this much money to act retarded for such a long time...

"get this on film kev'' the reason they are driving it down is so clearly so they have any reason at all to be grifting "for" this community who clearly have, nor want anything to do with them.

white saviourism, disgusting as it is, comes in dead second to the sheer greed grift, as the real reason for them doing this.

just when you think the Tranch cant disgust you any more lol.
fr i thought they actually at least had SOME actual link/close contact on the rez...fuck. they dont.
that poor guy. wait half an hour, hope alpacas wool is a good burner?

Well the storage crates they gave him looked pretty ok.
He probably ditched the wool and used the crates for something else.

Maybe he wasn’t even on the reservation, just a random Native American they had heard about?

Kittens do “turn up” at ranches and farms all the time - people callously dump them at the roadside, especially right after Christmas.

So it could be true.

That is one damn fine looking kitten though and in good condition too, I’d say someone paid good money for it, and it wasn’t fending for itself for long. Am I bad for immediately suspecting they just bought it?

Not at all. Penny is a callous shit and right now is certainly coming up with ways to damage control what Bonnie Wee Boner announced about Alpaca Genocide.

A poor ikkle wescue kwittie will melt hearts and minds quicker than troonery itself.

 

[Richard Cheese]

What are the three stooges going to do when they move to Penny's relatives house?

They can't grift as a Trans haven, they can't get surfs in to do the work, where's the angle?
I presume Kevin will just go on begging even without the backstory but it's hard to see how they can get any leverage.

Penny will claim Violent Capitalist Landlord Paul forcibly evicted the tranchers with the help of a heavily militarized cis white police force and/or Earl's militia. Dozens of unarmed black trans sex worker alpacas were killed in the siege. The surviving tranchers were forced to abandon the animals (but not Kevin's transformers) and take refuge with transphobic relatives who may hate crime them to death at any moment. Please donate to their GoFundMe to help replace their estrogen which was seized by Fat Paul.

Kevin will compromise the grift by tweeting excitedly about "moving day" but no one in the community will call them out on it.

 

[Longdrink]

Well the storage crates they gave him looked pretty ok.
He probably ditched the wool and used the crates for something else.

Maybe he wasn’t even on the reservation, just a random Native American they had heard about?



Not at all. Penny is a callous shit and right now is certainly coming up with ways to damage control what Bonnie Wee Boner announced about Alpaca Genocide.

A poor ikkle wescue kwittie will melt hearts and minds quicker than troonery itself.

That was my first reaction too, I remember hearing somewhere that one easy way to show audience that character is good is to show them rescuing small animals (especially kittens or puppies).