Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

[Associate Rick]

Just wanted to draw attention to Pat's handwriting. Something tells me that this isn't how a high IQ sci-fi novelist would write. Looks like the sped barely has control of his own digits.

View attachment 4217874

PArick, is this the spiritual successor to json?

 

[Die Dunkle Maus]

"Pealing knife" on his character sheet, Jesus fatty. Halfling? You wish, you fucking ogre.

 

[Firstname Lastname]

Just wanted to draw attention to Pat's handwriting. Something tells me that this isn't how a high IQ sci-fi novelist would write. Looks like the sped barely has control of his own digits.

View attachment 4217874

That "k" looks familiar. Also, connecting lowercase "e"s with the consonant in front of it.

 

[Pat Fried Rice]

Just wanted to draw attention to Pat's handwriting. Something tells me that this isn't how a high IQ sci-fi novelist would write. Looks like the sped barely has control of his own digits.

View attachment 4217874

Ok, so looking close at the sheet, did he put a “pealing knife” in his weapons? Did he mean a paring knife, and wouldn’t it be ”peeling” in any case? If he’s playing a halfling, he’s fucking doing it wrong. Those fuckers know their kitchen etiquette.

Edit: Partially ninja’d by @Die Dunkle Maus

 

[Broadside]

Ok, so looking close at the sheet, did he put a “pealing knife” in his weapons? Did he mean a paring knife, and wouldn’t it be ”peeling” in any case? If he’s playing a halfling, he’s fucking doing it wrong. Those fuckers know their kitchen etiquette.

Edit: Partially ninja’d by @Die Dunkle Maus

Why is he SO FUCKING RETARDED

 

[Die Dunkle Maus]

This proves it beyond any reasonable doubt, anyone who plays a 'halfling' is an annoying piece of shit.

"I don't wear shoes and I'm little like a chiiiiiiiild" get the fuck out of here, you disgust me.

 

[Pat Fried Rice]

This proves it beyond any reasonable doubt, anyone who plays a 'halfling' is an annoying piece of shit.

"I don't wear shoes and I'm little like a chiiiiiiiild" get the fuck out of here, you disgust me.

In my experience, they are best played by actual children (whimsical, chaotic, easy to explain a Disappearance when the kid gets bored or tired), or kindly grandmother types who just want to give you cookies, and then cut the purses of everyone in the room.

Patrick is likely playing one because they tend to be fat. Because he himself is also fat. Also, why is the retarded pig using a lance with a neg STR mod? You have 18 DEX, use a fucking rapier like every archetyped halfling rogue

Why is he SO FUCKING RETARDED
View attachment 4218104

Because his brain is actually fat. Like him.

 

[Henri Barbusse]

Pat playing a Halfling Ranger: "It's my turn to be the stalker child, child."

 

[FinnSven]

This proves it beyond any reasonable doubt, anyone who plays a 'halfling' is an annoying piece of shit.

"I don't wear shoes and I'm little like a chiiiiiiiild" get the fuck out of here, you disgust me.

I too despise hobbits for many reasons.

Real life hobbits are always annoying and never to be trusted.

 

[PST Stan Account]

SWAT lies from Fatrick
Ban new users from this thread
They glow like the moon

 

[Mörkö]

I too despise hobbits for many reasons.

Real life hobbits are always annoying and never to be trusted.

Indeed.

 

[HodgePodgeRogerDodger]

So there was gay drama because some Owen A. Poster got offended because someone was gonna recommend using Amazon/ Kindle’s promotional deal to get the book for free? They do realize that the author still gets paid right? Or do they just have a 1.7 GPA (1.2 without gym)? Or was that user just imitating Patrick by being an Internet tough guy?

Sad day when the wacky funsters from Owen A. and the KiwiSisters turn on each other. No more brother wars!

 

[Broadside]

This proves it beyond any reasonable doubt, anyone who plays a 'halfling' is an annoying piece of shit.

"I don't wear shoes and I'm little like a chiiiiiiiild" get the fuck out of here, you disgust me.

Goblinchads where you at??

 

[moocow]

So ... on what grounds did he convince Amazon to remove the book? Just curious.

Also, where can I get the damned thing now that the piggy's whining has successfully cowed a multi-billion-dollar fucking company into submission?

 

[Schwarzwald]

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"Halfling" is completely wrong for Pat. He should instead be some manner of amorphous blob creature such as a jelly or a slime. To begin with, they're a perfect physical representation of Pat due to their shapeless gelatinous forms. Not to mention, they embody Pat's character, as they completely lack a spine both literally and figuratively and generally present an annoyance to others without ever being taken especially seriously. In addition, they are notably toxic creatures, much like our hero himself.

I am proud of him for not putting all of his points into intelligence and wisdom, but then I remembered that Pat also fancies himself a badass tough guy in addition to being one of the greatest minds of our times.

So I'm thinking he should roll a Jelly warrior-poet, Jell-O S. Slimelinson, who will inevitably be "accidentally" taken down by friendly fire from the rest of his entire party in order to be rid of the obnoxious pretentious slimy bastard when they can't take his presence anymore. With Jell-O gone, Pat will be informed by the group that once a player's character is gone, the player is no longer invited or welcome to show up.

 

[Sneedfully and Peacefully]

Just wanted to draw attention to Pat's handwriting. Something tells me that this isn't how a high IQ sci-fi novelist would write. Looks like the sped barely has control of his own digits.

View attachment 4217874

>Pat plays PF2e

Autistic as fuck but PF1e is better. Of course the fatman can't crunch numbers in his head and build a fun whacky character and needs to play the pozzed sequel edition.

Edit: Also note the mustard/sauce stain on the lower left side. Classic pat.

 

[Meriasek]

>Pat plays PF2e

Autistic as fuck but PF1e is better. Of course the fatman can't crunch numbers in his head and build a fun whacky character and needs to play the pozzed sequel edition.

Edit: Also note the mustard/sauce stain on the lower left side. Classic pat.

I thought people played Pathfinder because it was basically DnD 3.5, and the newer DnD editions were too casual and gay. Why would they do the same with Pathfinder?

 

[Sneedfully and Peacefully]

I thought people played Pathfinder because it was basically DnD 3.5, and the newer DnD editions were too casual and gay. Why would they do the same with Pathfinder?

PF1e is a perfect DND 3.75e. 2e is some bastardization of it with the simplicity of DND 5e like a chimera. It's also pozzed if we're talking material like 5e. Slavery just got completely poofed from ever having existed if I remember right, they made an adventure where you're basically cops and they had to bend the knee about handling it correctly because retards screamed muh ACAB instead of letting anything be fun fantasy bullshit.

But that's not important, what's important is Fatrick is playing a halfling when he should instead be a rather rotund half-ogre with a predilection for abducting children from the Mwangi expanse.

 

[Maude Snew]

PF1e is a perfect DND 3.75e. 2e is some bastardization of it with the simplicity of DND 5e like a chimera. It's also pozzed if we're talking material like 5e. Slavery just got completely poofed from ever having existed if I remember right, they made an adventure where you're basically cops and they had to bend the knee about handling it correctly because retards screamed muh ACAB instead of letting anything be fun fantasy bullshit.

But that's not important, what's important is Fatrick is playing a halfling when he should instead be a rather rotund half-ogre with a predilection for abducting children from the Mwangi expanse.

If you ask me making a second edition of something that was made to cater to people who wouldn't move on to a new edition of a thing they liked is completely fucking retarded and thus the perfect game for Fat Rick to play.

Also if Wizards of the Coast are to be believed he should be an Orc, lazy, rude, always bix nooding at you. You are what you eat after all.

 

[REGENDarySumanai]

He really thought he was on to something with the "avocado is hobbit snot" phrase, eh? What an apocalyptic dingleberry. Zero imagination. Professional author.

I would have gone with comparing it to a testicle. Juvenile? Yes, but it rooted in fact.