Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Dumb Bitch Smoothie]

The Honey Jack Daniels took him down instead of some meal abomination.

Maybe his heart saw all the "nobody wants to work anymore" post and went "You know, I've given this place a lot, and all I've got is shit in return."

"Quiet quitting" but it's his arteries.

 

[AnOminous]

And the classic pineapple moment. And other bits of Jack's study of the art of knives.

 

[SandyCat]

I came here earlier, saw this thread hasn't been bumped in a while. Just saw someone on /ck/ post about this.

Jack is a huge asshole, but I still can't help but feel sympathy for him and his family. If he pulls thorough though, I can't imagine how much worse off he's going to be. There's a good chance we've seen the last of him on YouTube.

I want to feel bad for him but how do you have a heart attack, lose use in one arm from a stroke and continue eating like dog shit after all of that? If my doc told me I'm at serious risk of a heart attack I'd be on a diet of water and air

 

[Harlow]

I hope he lives but I hope he spends ages in the hospital going through absolute hell.

 

[Sneeder Griffin]

>Create a Jack thread on /v/
>/pol/ schizo immediately shits it up with anti-vaxxer bullshit, despite Jack being an anti-vaxxer himself

God damn it.

 

[BentDuck]

I want to feel bad for him but how do you have a heart attack, lose use in one arm from a stroke and continue eating like dog shit after all of that? If my doc told me I'm at serious risk of a heart attack I'd be on a diet of water and air

Just a deadly combination of arrogance, stupidity, and laziness. You're right though, at the end of the day, if he gave enough of a shit, he could have taken his rehab seriously and potentially regained most of the use of his claw. He could have made some lifestyle changes, and would have improved the quality of his life, instead of being on his deathbed.

 

[ZipDisk]

I'm going to break from the pack here and hope Jack makes a quick recovery. Not because I like him, but because he doesn't listen to his doctors anyway. They deserve to spend as little time with Jack as possible.

Also, the deathbed is a constant guilt trip from asshole family members, especially when you've broken contact with them. Everyone in the fucking call list will start telling you "Won't you regret it if you don't reach out?"

I hope Garret reaches out and bitch slaps the cripple.

 

[SandyCat]

Someone posted the webm Mr. Zirn showed me that introduced me to Ja/ck/ all those years ago. For whatever reason this one fucking broke me the first time I saw it. Still cracks me up to this day, too. Fatty better not die, dammit. I love laughing at him and his culinary abortions.

View attachment 4345600

Did he make a non-newtonian fluid out of fucking chicken batter?

I'm now convinced the glowies had to off him because he's becoming too powerful.

 

[AnOminous]

I'm going to break from the pack here and hope Jack makes a quick recovery. Not because I like him, but because he doesn't listen to his doctors anyway. They deserve to spend as little time with Jack as possible.

I don't think you're alone. I want to see this asshole fuck up some more.

All this primo content goes out the window if he actually dies.

I just don't want to see him linger on pathetically. He needs to have some gusto or it gets even more depressing than it's been already this year.

 

[Aunt Carol]

And now we get to play the telephone game of interpreting someone's condition as filtered through emotionally-compromised family members with no medical background.

"Heart attack and a seizure" and deathbed what? The goal is to be in the cath lab in under 90 minutes if he needs it; the United States medical system is designed around keeping Jacks alive.

 

[AnOminous]

"Heart attack and a seizure" and deathbed what? The goal is to be in the cath lab in under 90 minutes if he needs it; the United States medical system is designed around keeping Jacks alive.

Odds are good he just had another stroke, as expected. These tards have no idea what is going on.

 

[Chihiro]

Never really posted here, just lurked from time to time. Uhh potential RIP I suppose. Hope he lives just for shitposts to continue though.

 

[AnOminous]

>Create a Jack thread on /v/
>/pol/ schizo immediately shits it up with anti-vaxxer bullshit, despite Jack being an anti-vaxxer himself

God damn it.

So you started this gay-ass thread?

/v/ - >Except vidya game series to live forever >Suddenl - Video Games - 4chan

>Except vidya game series to live forever >Suddenly dies out of nowhere Name the game. - "/v/ - Video Games" is 4chan's imageboard dedicated to the discussion of PC and console video games.

boards.4channel.org

 

[L. Ron Hubbard's Cat]

Never really posted here, just lurked from time to time. Uhh potential RIP I suppose. Hope he lives just for shitposts to continue though.

Yeah, it's a pity if he goes. This thread was a pretty fun read, mostly because I enjoyed the dueling autists arguing over what defines a proper chili, but never mind that.

I have to say that the last few seasons of Jack Scalfani have been a bit repetitive, though. His increasing coverage by reaction channels had some promise as a new arc, but frankly I don't blame the writers for wanting to end it here. If the series wasn't going to go out on a high note, at least it avoided going out on the lowest possible note. It's better to burn out than to fade away and all. And I feel like it's beneath the dignity of the wendigo spirit to end up being tube fed in some sterile ICU somewhere.

So mixed feelings, overall.

 

[Fascist Frederick]

I hope Garrett can make it there in time to say goodbye, by taking Jack to the ground and putting him out of everyone's misery.

 

[AnOminous]

So mixed feelings, overall.

You have to appreciate the irony, sort of like ending the Sopranos with "Don't Stop Believing" or St. Elsewhere with an autistic retard staring into a snow globe.

Or Jack Scalfani, staring into the anus of a raw chicken, calling it moist, and diving in.

 

[toilet_rainbow]

I kinda feel like it's not the end just yet for ol Jacko. Maybe his YouTubey days will be over, but he's like a cockroach. On the other hand, he has had multiple strokes and apparently two heart attacks? JFC. He's begging for death with the way he eats.

He was in the hospital recently for another health scare. So this is long overdue.

 

[ZipDisk]

The Scalfani prayer warriors have an ominous track record.

 

[AnOminous]

Goddammit the vax bullshit has invaded the /ck/ thread too.

I'm enjoying the sperg getting angry that someone thinks eating raw ground beef is a good idea, though. Does he not realize he's on 4chan?

 

[Aaway]

i'll be pretty bummed out if jack dies

there really isn't a more comedic cow than jack. as if the terrible cooking isn't enough, you're also treated to his trademark passive-aggressiveness, inability to handle any sort of criticism, belittling of service workers, and just his all-around awfulness. the fact that he has yet to show any signs of improvement with his cooking after 16 years of having a cooking channel is hilarious in itself, but when you combine that with how much of an asshole he is, it's just pure, unparalleled comedy

unfortunately, you could see the end coming in recent months. ever since that uncle roger reaction video, jack has been far more angy and passive aggressive in his videos, even going as far as referring back to actual comments left on his videos (in an angry tone) which is something he would never do in the past. there was also his "stress related" episode a few months ago that landed him in the hospital and there have also been more posts from him on FB alluding to stress, including one he posted earlier today. if jack actually dies, it'd be safe to say that it was literally the mean comments that killed him. imagine that

anyways, i personally don't think he'll die because that motherfucker has cheated death numerous times. maybe he ends up losing his other arm? how hilarious would that be. jack is just far too entertaining of a trainwreck for me to wish death upon him

if this is the end, then it's been a blast posting here with you fine people over the last several years. many, many laughs were had