Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

[The Taco Santo!]

I think she's an actual woman, but troon or not she produces a lot more work than Rick and her Twitter account is almost solely about her books so it's unfortunate she had to sit so close to someone so very very fat who turns Negro children into pepperoni:
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Jesus, what is it about ugly chicks and steampunk? Anyway, thanks for the trigger warnings on your books. Now I know not to read them.

 

[John_Smith]

Spoiler: Image of a Pig man keeping his gut sucked in

I have no idea how to insert the image as a thumbnail without downloading it then attaching it.

He looks a bit slimmer, Hmmm.

No way he kept that gunt sucked in that much the whole time at the con. Thinkin' The Patster might be wearing a girdle men's foundation garment. He's certainly vain enough. Yeah, he's definitely doing that. Eventually, corsets.

 

[Maude Snew]

Spoiler: Image of a Pig man keeping his gut sucked in

I have no idea how to insert the image as a thumbnail without downloading it then attaching it.

He looks a bit slimmer, Hmmm.

No way he kept that gunt sucked in that much the whole time at the con. Thinkin' The Patster might be wearing a girdle men's foundation garment. He's certainly vain enough. Yeah, he's definitely doing that. Eventually, corsets.

I was gonna say look at William Fatner over here but these days Shatner is also very fat. I wonder if he ever cheated at a half marathon.

 

[Ophelia]

He could try the Fetterman slob look. It might be manlier than pop culture shirts for twelve year olds. Maybe.

 

[PST Stan Account]

He could try the Fetterman slob look. It might be manlier than pop culture shirts for twelve year olds. Maybe.

Rick's 5'9", that look works on giant ogres like Fetterman but Rick would just look like the fat kid who got beat with skateboards behind the supermarket.

I actually enjoy the poetry, to a delightful degree.

All poetry is shitty. Every fucking bit of it.

All poetry is shitty except for Patetry.

To write a haiku about Pat is to be funnier, more precise with your wording, and more productive than he is. It's being better than him at what he takes most pride in, like how his Special Forces Best Dad Ever cousin is so much better at being a man than he is, it kills him.

I don't have the time and dedication to throw at something as long and as brilliant as Dr. Forms with A Christmas Carnage, but we contribute what we can.

His jokes are total bullshit, but he's trying to get famous with them. We're 20x funnier than he is and we're just fucking around being stupid. That's the idiots winning.

 

[Anonymus Fluhre]

Rick's 5'9", that look works on giant ogres like Fetterman but Rick would just look like the fat kid who got beat with skateboards behind the supermarket.

LOL fucking manlet

All poetry is shitty except for Patetry.

To write a haiku about Pat is to be funnier, more precise with your wording, and more productive than he is. It's being better than him at what he takes most pride in, like how his Special Forces Best Dad Ever cousin is so much better at being a man than he is, it kills him.

My wife is better at being a man than he is and she gave birth to three Jews so that's not a difficult accomplishment to have in life.

 

[JCDenthog]

I think she's an actual woman, but troon or not she produces a lot more work than Rick and her Twitter account is almost solely about her books so it's unfortunate she had to sit so close to someone so very very fat who turns Negro children into pepperoni:
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She might not be a troon but she's ugly enough to be one

 

[SpergioLeonne]

It's been nearly a month since I've checked in on Patty here. I know I would never have sex with him but can someone tell me if her is still fat?

FAT is what Rick is
Bulging, nipples protruding
It is as always

 

[Illuminati Order Official]

I think she's an actual woman, but troon or not she produces a lot more work than Rick

That's not difficult. Literal retard on schizophrenia meds produced two feature-length animated movies in one year while Fatrick wasn't able to produce a single short novel.

 

[Wodanaz]

Valaskjalf productions
proudly presents...
​

Kiwi Paradise​

Dedicated to: @Trayvon Fartin​

As I browse through the thread where I harvest my laughs
I take a look at my cow and realize he's very fat
But that's just perfect for a Kiwi like me
You know, we shun faggy things like reddit decency
At 4:30 in the morning, I'm trollin' Pat
Fatrick stalks the childs and Niki takes the BRAAAP

And I've been trollin' and stalkin' so long that
Even Joshua thinks that my mind is gone
I'm a man of the forum, I'm into shitpostin'
Got a keyboard on my desk and neckbeard on my chin
But if I negrate all of your posts, and you negrate mine
Then tonight, we're gonna shitpost like it's 1999

We been browsing most our lives
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
I may have sperged out once or twice
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
It's not work, in fact it's nice
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
We sell laughs at discount price
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise

A newfag went and rated me as dumb last week
I just smiled at him and I turned the other cheek
I really don't care, in fact I wish him well
Cause I'll be laughing my head off when he gets halal'd to Hell
But I ain't never swatted a cow even if he deserved it
A Kiwi tippin cows?
You know that's unheard of

I never post cringe but I got a top hat
And all my Kiwis agree we really just don't like blacks, fool
If you come to visit, you'll probably leave in tears
We'll be the funniest site online for the next 300 years
But we ain't really quaint, so please don't point and stare
We're just autismologically impaired

There's no feed, no seed, no chuckposting
Not a single pepperoni
Like Fatrick's special basement
It's as lawless as can be

We been browsing most our lives
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
We're just plain and simple guys
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
Lots of time for sin and vice
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
We always fight, we don't play nice
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise

Ratin' up the funny, postin' lots of garbage
Doxed a cow on Monday, soon I'll dox another
Think you're really funny?
Think your site is pure at heart?
Well, I know mine's a million times as funny as thou's art
I'm the spergy guy the little Kiwis wanna be like
On my knees day and night, scorin stickers for the afterlife
So don't be vain and don't be whiny
Or else, my brother, I might have to get negrating on your heinie

We been browsing most our lives
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
We're all crazy watching mice
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
Lots of mods and shitpost fights
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
But you'd probably think it bites
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise

 

[Lady Crow]

Valaskjalf productions
proudly presents...
​

Kiwi Paradise​

Dedicated to: @Trayvon Fartin​

As I browse through the thread where I harvest my laughs
I take a look at my cow and realize he's very fat
But that's just perfect for a Kiwi like me
You know, we shun faggy things like reddit decency
At 4:30 in the morning, I'm trollin' Pat
Fatrick stalks the childs and Niki takes the BRAAAP

And I've been trollin' and stalkin' so long that
Even Joshua thinks that my mind is gone
I'm a man of the forum, I'm into shitpostin'
Got a keyboard on my desk and neckbeard on my chin
But if I negrate all of your posts, and you negrate mine
Then tonight, we're gonna shitpost like it's 1999

We been browsing most our lives
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
I may have sperged out once or twice
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
It's not work, in fact it's nice
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
We sell laughs at discount price
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise

A newfag went and rated me as dumb last week
I just smiled at him and I turned the other cheek
I really don't care, in fact I wish him well
Cause I'll be laughing my head off when he gets halal'd to Hell
But I ain't never swatted a cow even if he deserved it
A Kiwi tippin cows?
You know that's unheard of

I never post cringe but I got a top hat
And all my Kiwis agree we really just don't like blacks, fool
If you come to visit, you'll probably leave in tears
We'll be the funniest site online for the next 300 years
But we ain't really quaint, so please don't point and stare
We're just autismologically impaired

There's no feed, no seed, no chuckposting
Not a single pepperoni
Like Fatrick's special basement
It's as lawless as can be

We been browsing most our lives
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
We're just plain and simple guys
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
Lots of time for sin and vice
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
We always fight, we don't play nice
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise

Ratin' up the funny, postin' lots of garbage
Doxed a cow on Monday, soon I'll dox another
Think you're really funny?
Think your site is pure at heart?
Well, I know mine's a million times as funny as thou's art
I'm the spergy guy the little Kiwis wanna be like
On my knees day and night, scorin stickers for the afterlife
So don't be vain and don't be whiny
Or else, my brother, I might have to get negrating on your heinie

We been browsing most our lives
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
We're all crazy watching mice
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
Lots of mods and shitpost fights
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
But you'd probably think it bites
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise

Best part is you obviously used Amish Paradise as the base rather than Gangster's Paradise

 

[Broadside]

Pat- who doesn't know the first thing about how the stock market works- was telling people to short $TSLA not too long ago. How did that go? Let's find out (courtesy of the Pests):

Spoiler: Text convo

 

[siegemeister675]

Valaskjalf productions
proudly presents...
​

Kiwi Paradise​

Dedicated to: @Trayvon Fartin​

As I browse through the thread where I harvest my laughs
I take a look at my cow and realize he's very fat
But that's just perfect for a Kiwi like me
You know, we shun faggy things like reddit decency
At 4:30 in the morning, I'm trollin' Pat
Fatrick stalks the childs and Niki takes the BRAAAP

And I've been trollin' and stalkin' so long that
Even Joshua thinks that my mind is gone
I'm a man of the forum, I'm into shitpostin'
Got a keyboard on my desk and neckbeard on my chin
But if I negrate all of your posts, and you negrate mine
Then tonight, we're gonna shitpost like it's 1999

We been browsing most our lives
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
I may have sperged out once or twice
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
It's not work, in fact it's nice
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
We sell laughs at discount price
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise

A newfag went and rated me as dumb last week
I just smiled at him and I turned the other cheek
I really don't care, in fact I wish him well
Cause I'll be laughing my head off when he gets halal'd to Hell
But I ain't never swatted a cow even if he deserved it
A Kiwi tippin cows?
You know that's unheard of

I never post cringe but I got a top hat
And all my Kiwis agree we really just don't like blacks, fool
If you come to visit, you'll probably leave in tears
We'll be the funniest site online for the next 300 years
But we ain't really quaint, so please don't point and stare
We're just autismologically impaired

There's no feed, no seed, no chuckposting
Not a single pepperoni
Like Fatrick's special basement
It's as lawless as can be

We been browsing most our lives
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
We're just plain and simple guys
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
Lots of time for sin and vice
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
We always fight, we don't play nice
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise

Ratin' up the funny, postin' lots of garbage
Doxed a cow on Monday, soon I'll dox another
Think you're really funny?
Think your site is pure at heart?
Well, I know mine's a million times as funny as thou's art
I'm the spergy guy the little Kiwis wanna be like
On my knees day and night, scorin stickers for the afterlife
So don't be vain and don't be whiny
Or else, my brother, I might have to get negrating on your heinie

We been browsing most our lives
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
We're all crazy watching mice
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
Lots of mods and shitpost fights
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
But you'd probably think it bites
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise

Did you adjust the lyrics of the actual Coolio original or the Weird Al parody Amish Paradise?

 

[Wodanaz]

Did you adjust the lyrics of the actual Coolio original or the Weird Al parody Amish Paradise?

the superior one

 

[Force and Character]

Pat- who doesn't know the first thing about how the stock market works- was telling people to short $TSLA not too long ago. How did that go? Let's find out (courtesy of the Pests):

Spoiler: Text convo

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View attachment 4348408

"All you do is go to prison" legit cracked me up. Does Rick, like the infant baby child he is, think that it will magically come true one day if he repeats it many thousands of times?

 

[Satan McAllister]

"All you do is go to prison" legit cracked me up. Does Rick, like the infant baby child he is, think that it will magically come true one day if he repeats it many thousands of times?

Meanwhile TSLA is up over $16 today.

 

[I Can Smell My Balls]

These pants are about to BURST. Look at the way the zipper flap sticks out. That is a classic sign that your pants are too tight. Also notice how his shirt is exactly at his waist, because it means that his big fatty fat fatso gut is stretching it out and preventing it from hanging lower like it would on a less-fat person.

 

[Anonymus Fluhre]

Valaskjalf productions
proudly presents...
​

Kiwi Paradise​

Dedicated to: @Trayvon Fartin​

As I browse through the thread where I harvest my laughs
I take a look at my cow and realize he's very fat
But that's just perfect for a Kiwi like me
You know, we shun faggy things like reddit decency
At 4:30 in the morning, I'm trollin' Pat
Fatrick stalks the childs and Niki takes the BRAAAP

And I've been trollin' and stalkin' so long that
Even Joshua thinks that my mind is gone
I'm a man of the forum, I'm into shitpostin'
Got a keyboard on my desk and neckbeard on my chin
But if I negrate all of your posts, and you negrate mine
Then tonight, we're gonna shitpost like it's 1999

We been browsing most our lives
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
I may have sperged out once or twice
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
It's not work, in fact it's nice
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
We sell laughs at discount price
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise

A newfag went and rated me as dumb last week
I just smiled at him and I turned the other cheek
I really don't care, in fact I wish him well
Cause I'll be laughing my head off when he gets halal'd to Hell
But I ain't never swatted a cow even if he deserved it
A Kiwi tippin cows?
You know that's unheard of

I never post cringe but I got a top hat
And all my Kiwis agree we really just don't like blacks, fool
If you come to visit, you'll probably leave in tears
We'll be the funniest site online for the next 300 years
But we ain't really quaint, so please don't point and stare
We're just autismologically impaired

There's no feed, no seed, no chuckposting
Not a single pepperoni
Like Fatrick's special basement
It's as lawless as can be

We been browsing most our lives
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
We're just plain and simple guys
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
Lots of time for sin and vice
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
We always fight, we don't play nice
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise

Ratin' up the funny, postin' lots of garbage
Doxed a cow on Monday, soon I'll dox another
Think you're really funny?
Think your site is pure at heart?
Well, I know mine's a million times as funny as thou's art
I'm the spergy guy the little Kiwis wanna be like
On my knees day and night, scorin stickers for the afterlife
So don't be vain and don't be whiny
Or else, my brother, I might have to get negrating on your heinie

We been browsing most our lives
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
We're all crazy watching mice
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
Lots of mods and shitpost fights
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise
But you'd probably think it bites
Postin' in a Kiwi paradise

 

[RussianParasite]

Pat- who doesn't know the first thing about how the stock market works- was telling people to short $TSLA not too long ago. How did that go? Let's find out (courtesy of the Pests):

Spoiler: Text convo

View attachment 4348380
View attachment 4348404
View attachment 4348408

I do not believe for one second that Pat could explain what a short is or how it works. I do hope, though, that he does have some dumbass naked short position on Tesla right now and is getting absolutely blown out.

I actually do wish he would shit out stock advice so I/we could take the opposite positions. It would make all of us, brothermen and stalker children alike, very wealthy.

 

[I Can Smell My Balls]

I do not believe for one second that Pat could explain what a short is or how it works.

He could definitely tell you all about short ribs though. Because he's fat.