Disaster Massachusetts police on the hunt for 200-pound stolen Shrek statue - Worse than Jan 6 + 9/11

Shrek is love, Shrek is life, Shrek is… missing?

Police in Hatfield, Massachusetts, have launched a search for a 200-pound statue of the cinema ogre after it was reported missing from its home.

The Hatfield Police Department posted an alert about the absent ogre on Facebook on Wednesday. They included a photo of the fluorescent-green cement statue, clad in Shrek’s iconic vest.

“If you have any information of his current whereabouts please reach out to our department or return him in the condition you found him,” the department said.

The Hatfield Police Department did not immediately respond to a request for comment from CNN.

And the swamp resident is already being missed, according to police.

“The dragon sculpture he lives with is frustrated and lonely,” the department said in the Facebook post.

Shrek, a green, antisocial and territorial ogre, is the titular character of the 2001 Dreamworks film. The movie, which parodies other fairy tales, has had an enduring legacy and spawned multiple sequels and spinoffs.

https://edition.cnn.com/2023/02/04/us/hatfield-massachusetts-stolen-shrek-statue-trnd/index.html (Archive)



https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=497472072550821&set=ecnf.100068640962301 (Archive)

 

[SofondaCox]

I hope they mail one of his ears to the cops.

 

[CuzinEd]

The statue of Shrek that looks like some retard from Deviant Art made it. LOL

 

[ZehnBoat]

we'll just put the totem of fail in it's place in the meantime

 

[Prophetic Spirit]

The statue of Shrek that looks like some retard from Deviant Art made it. LOL

Yes.

Same vibes.

 

[literalwho?]

The police post reads like something that Chris Chan would write.

 

[Peanut Butter in Peril]

If that's what the Shrek statue looks like I don't want to know how the dragon sculpture next to it looks.

 

[Spicey McHaggis]

Poor guy just wanted to get back to his swamp.

 

[Mediocre]

You'll never take me in alive, it's mine now.

 

[Onni Kalsarikännit]

Got probably kidnapped by terrorists.

 

[WonderWino]

When the thief gets caught he should simply confront the cops with accusations they and the state government is racist because the word massa is in massachusetts so its a subtle jab at blacks being slaves, and then slip away when they're distracted falling all over themselves trying to prove how not racist they are

 

[Johnny Salami]

Welcome to Biden's Amerikkka

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

It's all ogre now.

 

[ZazietheBeast]

Even to this day Shrek is still getting talked about.

Play this music. Maybe it will make finding him easier.

 

[Fungible penis]

Even to this day Shrek is still getting talked about.

Play this music. Maybe it will make finding him easier.

SOME

 

[The Foxtrot]

Even to this day Shrek is still getting talked about.

Play this music. Maybe it will make finding him easier.

It's not Ogre, it's never Ogre.

Shrek is Love.
Shrek is Life.

 

[From The Uncanny Valley]

I hate what Shrek became.

 

[The Foxtrot]

I hate what Shrek became.

Your Lord and Savior, that's what He is! Can you not feel the love He has for you?

 

[LikeAStone 2.0]

That’s certainly a headline that caught me off guard.

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

If it turns out that this thief stole this statue because he thought he did not like the fact that people were trashing Shrek The Third from back in the day, then I would not be shocked as to how the people of Massachusetts are really upset about this.