They don't have anywhere to turn. That's the point of the one and only 'transwidow escape committee' forum on mumsnet. Because to do anything but put up with abuse is seen as bigoted. We know there are a billion 'trans support groups' out there, but zero spaces for wives. It's why their stories get censored from the mainstream- 'trans girls' are uwu weak and stunning, brave.
Therapists can't support them. And often families shun women being abused in this way unless they affirm husbands. The wives are seen as the cause, too- if they had been better wives, they would have maintained order and stopped him. Or she wasn't woman enough etc.
You glean this by reading accounts from the women themselves. Blaming wives as not being good enough at woman-ing, by being bad wives- say, like by cucking their husbands, is not true and more of the same abuse and blame. A rule of sexism is that women are to blame for men's abuse of women, always (like she was asking for it, she nagged him, she wants to 'take him to the cleaners' in divorce so of course he killed his family).
Trans is another manifestation of society's low view of women, and a flex of male oppression of women. It's abusive, casting women as sex objects, and threatening their safety, on a mass scale. On the macro, it's not caring about women's experience or feelings at all. On the macro, that looks like making toilets and prisons mixed sex with no consultation. On the micro, that looks like blaming women for cucking the agp husband.
A trans widow is a woman whose male partner believes that they have a gender identity other than “man” or who cross dresses. Women in this situation report feeling like their male partner has died. This site exists to share the experiences of trans widows.
www.transwidowsvoices.org