I by turns like (for the spergy rant potential) and dislike (because of the overexplaining required to get the precision across) giving the Hot Guy Breakdown. Yes, lusting after 10s is a fool's errand. A stupidly handsome guy is going to have attention overload. The likelihood that he'll pick YOU, yes YOU out of his crowd of admirers is slim to none, and it might not even have anything to do with you! You might catch him at the wrong time, or you blend into the sea of guys slobbering over him. It's dismissive and unfair to split the dating pool into "uggo trolls" and "Chad Thundercock". It's also not entirely -wrong-, once you extend implications beyond physical appearance.
True, not many people were blessed with perfect bone structure or flawless skin. But, there's a list of personality traits that, when a guy actually has them and performs them in reality, have measurable visible effects on him. Is it guaranteed that suave Instagram model is a nice person? Hell no. Does it point vaguely in the direction of, say, a person who has the responsibility and discipline to maintain a gym routine? The self-confidence to select clothes that actually fit him instead of throwing on whatever? Executive function?
It's not that physical appearance is what makes someone a catch. It's that several traits which show up in catches have a frequent glow-up effect on physical appearance. Unfortunately it also increases the volume of meaningless attention you get, which lowers your chances of separating wheat from chaff.
I guess what I'm saying is, the Ab Mafia exists for a reason. It's not a reason that helps as much as the gays think. And gay dating is an awful black hole that suffers far more from its tiny pool, heightened pickiness, and nonexistent social pressure for commitment. If you're husband fishing, you need WAY more luck than a fat chick who just needs to lower her standards a smidgen and get a guy drunk. There isn't really a winning move. This has been my TED talk.
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