Carnivore Diet / Ancestral Living / Lion Diet - Food abominations, pseudoscience and cholesterol problems galore!

[MS Paint Gigachad]

I decided to look up what carnivores eat for dessert.
You have quite a few semi-helpful suggestions like homemade unsweetened ice-cream or panna cotta, but you also have lunacy.

Reddit - Dive into anything

www.reddit.com

This sounds somewhere between filthy rich and just greasy.

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www.reddit.com

"You want dessert? How about you shovel even more savory stuff into your mouth?"

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Top comment is extremely helpful:

Another proponent for heavy cream:


But what takes the cake for me is the Epic Carnivore Meat Cake recipe from ladycarnivory.com:

Spoiler: Saving some space

epic carnivore meat cake - Lady Carnivory

Take your meat game to the next level with this delicious cake recipe. Perfect for special occasions, this meaty creation is sure to impress.

www.ladycarnivory.com

The recipe is as follows:

LAYER 1 (BOTTOM)
Cake: 1lb ground beef, 1 egg white
Filling: 2 oz stilton & 2 oz cream cheese
Icing: noodle fondant
Decor: 2oz fried cheddar cheese collar

LAYER 2 (MIDDLE)
Cake: 1/2lb ground pork, 1 egg white
Filling: sausage gravy
Icing: 8oz cream cheese and 8oz butter buttercream
Decor: 4 slices of bacon shingles

LAYER 3 (TOP)
Cake: 1/2lb ground chicken, 1 egg white
Filling: 2 oz plain greek yogurt and 2 egg salad
Icing: hollandaise
Decor: crispy egg bits

Links to recipes for the fondant, gravy, hollandaise and crispy egg bits were included. The hollandaise was a pretty normal one, just with no herbs or spices.
Fondant:

INGREDIENTS
For noodles:
2 egg yolks
2 c mozzarella
INSTRUCTIONS
For noodles:

• soften mozzarella in the microwave for 30 seconds
• let cool for a moment before mixing in egg yolks
• flatten noodles between two sheets of parchment paper using a rolling pin
• refrigerate overnight to “dry” noodles out

She tells you to basically take a sheet of those non-noodles and wrap the cake with it.
Gravy:

INGREDIENTS
1lb country style sausage
4 oz cream cheese
4-8 oz heavy cream

The ingredients speak for themselves.
The crispy egg bits were essentially scrambled eggs that were left on the pan too long and dried out.

This really do be some Epic Meal Time bullshit.

 

[Goth Pierrot]

But what takes the cake for me is the Epic Carnivore Meat Cake recipe from ladycarnivory.com:

I do not understand why they have to put in this amount of effort for the most disgusting sounding food i have ever heard of, just so it fits their diet. Just be normal and occasionally enjoy a treat instead of being an orthorexic weirdo.


And reminds me a lot of vegans and their weird fake foods.

 

[JelloJerk]

I do not understand why they have to put in this amount of effort for the most disgusting sounding food i have ever heard of, just so it fits their diet. Just be normal and occasionally enjoy a treat instead of being an orthorexic weirdo.


And reminds me a lot of vegans and their weird fake foods.

Alternatively, cut off treats all together. If you really want to change your lifestyle and live "LIKE MUH ANCESTORS" then either commit, or don't. Doing it halfway and eating butter and cream as "treats" is the worst of both worlds.

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

I do not understand why they have to put in this amount of effort for the most disgusting sounding food i have ever heard of, just so it fits their diet. Just be normal and occasionally enjoy a treat instead of being an orthorexic weirdo.


And reminds me a lot of vegans and their weird fake foods.

To be honest, nobody in their right mind is wasting the time or effort to make this shit.

Also why is nothing ever actually seasoned? No herbs or spices, just salt. Never mind that salt is an industrial commodity produced solely by sedentary, agricultural civilizations, as opposed to the vast quantities of herbs and spices that can be harvested naturally.

 

[Goth Pierrot]

To be honest, nobody in their right mind is wasting the time or effort to make this shit.

Also why is nothing ever actually seasoned? No herbs or spices, just salt. Never mind that salt is an industrial commodity produced solely by sedentary, agricultural civilizations, as opposed to the vast quantities of herbs and spices that can be harvested naturally.

A personal lolcow of mine thinks that eating salt is the same as eating any other rock, and that it should never be used under any circumstance. Funny that he also follows the carnivore diet as well.

 

[JelloJerk]

To be honest, nobody in their right mind is wasting the time or effort to make this shit.

Also why is nothing ever actually seasoned? No herbs or spices, just salt. Never mind that salt is an industrial commodity produced solely by sedentary, agricultural civilizations, as opposed to the vast quantities of herbs and spices that can be harvested naturally.

Ancestral Healing, the girl I linked, seems to imply that she has some sort of health issue with herbs and spices, but who knows how much is actually true and how much is pseudo science/placebo.

 

[Goth Pierrot]

Ancestral Healing, the girl I linked, seems to imply that she has some sort of health issue with herbs and spices, but who knows how much is actually true and how much is pseudo science/placebo.

sounds like total bullshit lmfao

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

Ancestral Healing, the girl I linked, seems to imply that she has some sort of health issue with herbs and spices, but who knows how much is actually true and how much is pseudo science/placebo.

I see, the fruits, herbs and spices that are essential to traditional medicines in all cultures on Earth are not part of ancestral healing...

 

[MS Paint Gigachad]

To be honest, nobody in their right mind is wasting the time or effort to make this shit.

Also why is nothing ever actually seasoned? No herbs or spices, just salt. Never mind that salt is an industrial commodity produced solely by sedentary, agricultural civilizations, as opposed to the vast quantities of herbs and spices that can be harvested naturally.

Come to think of it, a civilization eating dairy generally implies that they domesticated a goat or cow or something. Which, according to Wikipedia, happened about 10k years ago. And we'd started farming wheat, barley, lentils etc by then. And even before that people were eating wild grains and shit, not to mention foraging for berries, tubers and so on.

So, for a historically accurate ancestral diet,
Before bipedalism era: mostly plant-based, since you wouldn't have been able to hunt large prey
Caveman era: half of your calories come from plant based sources (see the hadza tribe). A little grain. No dairy, you haven't invented the domesticated cow yet. Next to no eggs since you'd have to scavenge them.
Early agriculture era: some milk, some eggs, some vegetables and grains, some meat.

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

Come to think of it, a civilization eating dairy generally implies that they domesticated a goat or cow or something. Which, according to Wikipedia, happened about 10k years ago. And we'd started farming wheat, barley, lentils etc by then. And even before that people were eating wild grains and shit, not to mention foraging for berries, tubers and so on.

So, for a historically accurate ancestral diet,
Before bipedalism era: mostly plant-based, since you wouldn't have been able to hunt large prey
Caveman era: half of your calories come from plant based sources (see the hadza tribe). A little grain. No dairy, you haven't invented the domesticated cow yet. Next to no eggs since you'd have to scavenge them.
Early agriculture era: some milk, some eggs, some vegetables and grains, some meat.

Pretty much.

I also find it funny they use cream cheese despite the fact it's unequivocally an industrial product that has only existed and been possible to create since the late 19th century. It's about as ancestral as a package of Thomas' English Muffins.

 

[Android raptor]

I decided to look up what carnivores eat for dessert.
You have quite a few semi-helpful suggestions like homemade unsweetened ice-cream or panna cotta, but you also have lunacy.

Reddit - Dive into anything

www.reddit.com

This sounds somewhere between filthy rich and just greasy.
View attachment 4614257

Reddit - Dive into anything

www.reddit.com

View attachment 4614328
"You want dessert? How about you shovel even more savory stuff into your mouth?"
View attachment 4614330View attachment 4614334

Reddit - Dive into anything

www.reddit.com

Top comment is extremely helpful:
View attachment 4614337
Another proponent for heavy cream:
View attachment 4614373

But what takes the cake for me is the Epic Carnivore Meat Cake recipe from ladycarnivory.com:

Spoiler: Saving some space

epic carnivore meat cake - Lady Carnivory

Take your meat game to the next level with this delicious cake recipe. Perfect for special occasions, this meaty creation is sure to impress.

www.ladycarnivory.com

View attachment 4614696
The recipe is as follows:

Links to recipes for the fondant, gravy, hollandaise and crispy egg bits were included. The hollandaise was a pretty normal one, just with no herbs or spices.
Fondant:

She tells you to basically take a sheet of those non-noodles and wrap the cake with it.
Gravy:

The ingredients speak for themselves.
The crispy egg bits were essentially scrambled eggs that were left on the pan too long and dried out.

This really do be some Epic Meal Time bullshit.

If you want an animal product dessert, I would think jello would be the go-to. Plus, it's pretty healthy unlike most of these monstrosities they create.

Come to think of it, a civilization eating dairy generally implies that they domesticated a goat or cow or something. Which, according to Wikipedia, happened about 10k years ago. And we'd started farming wheat, barley, lentils etc by then. And even before that people were eating wild grains and shit, not to mention foraging for berries, tubers and so on.

So, for a historically accurate ancestral diet,
Before bipedalism era: mostly plant-based, since you wouldn't have been able to hunt large prey
Caveman era: half of your calories come from plant based sources (see the hadza tribe). A little grain. No dairy, you haven't invented the domesticated cow yet. Next to no eggs since you'd have to scavenge them.
Early agriculture era: some milk, some eggs, some vegetables and grains, some meat.

Pre-bipedalism I would assume would be similar to chimps and bonobos, since that would be the common ancestor of them and humans. Chimps are mostly herbivores, but they do some hunting. Some chimps even use sharpened sticks to hunt bushbabies and other small arboreal prey. It makes me wonder if the last common ancestor of chimps and humans had figured out how to make basic spears like that, which I'm sure would've been very helpful for human ancestors after leaving the trees.

That said, humans and human ancestors are still omnivores. Even after gaining the ability to hunt large prey, they still foraged for fruits/veggies/tubers/etc. Being intelligent omnivores is part of why humans were able to take over the world, endless food options in most places (as long as you figure out what's edible).

 

[anliteralidiot]

What's the argument for not eating honey? It's not a fruit or vegetable, it's essentially bee vomit, so what's stopping these guys?

Because every time I see their salt-laden meals, I just want to know if they ever get sick of just salt.

If you're rad enough to get your own honey, it might even have some extra protein in it before you filter it!

 

[JelloJerk]

What's the argument for not eating honey? It's not a fruit or vegetable, it's essentially bee vomit, so what's stopping these guys?

Because every time I see their salt-laden meals, I just want to know if they ever get sick of just salt.

If you're rad enough to get your own honey, it might even have some extra protein in it before you filter it!

"Honey's for pussies bro"
AFAIK, vegans do not eat honey because it's an animal (bug?) product, and really shouldn't carnivores just be the inverse of vegan? I think some of them do eat honey, so I guess it's not set in stone.

 

[MS Paint Gigachad]

What's the argument for not eating honey? It's not a fruit or vegetable, it's essentially bee vomit, so what's stopping these guys?

One argument I've heard is that because it's essentially concentrated nectar, it's loaded with fructose, which is pure refined obesity, which is proof there is no god, for if there was, how could this evil take us?

"Zero carb" is a term I hear thrown about a lot in carnie circles.

Because every time I see their salt-laden meals, I just want to know if they ever get sick of just salt.

Jordan freakin Peterson himself said he wouldnt lightly recommend the diet to people, saying it's monotonous. So yeah. I guess they do get sick of it.

If you're rad enough to get your own honey, it might even have some extra protein in it before you filter it!

Eating ze bugz? Very based, now get into zat pod...

 

[teriyakiburns]

What's the argument for not eating honey? It's not a fruit or vegetable, it's essentially bee vomit, so what's stopping these guys?

Honey consumption predates agriculture by millennia in humans. Words related to honey and bee-keeping have the oldest roots in indo-european languages, older even than words related to cattle. They certainly predate the invention of words for agriculture that occurred after early divergences in the language. All stone-age-type tribal human societies harvest honey when they have the chance, as do most ape species, so if anything would be a guaranteed part of a paleolithic-style diet, it would be honey.

 

[ITK]

Did you read the op past section 3

Fuck off

EDIT: there is something I would consider, that being that for section 3 I'd use actually whacky pseudoscience like "calories don't matter on carnie" from carnivorecoachpayton or maybe liver king's "the stronger the animal the more strength you get from it"

but at the same time i feel that no matter how wacky the pseudoscience there's still gonna be one guy who'll show up saying bUt iT mAKeS sENsE a la flat earther

Another question: in your opinion, what should the thread be about? My vision for it has always been to laugh at the food abominations and health problems when people fuck it up - not "haha, they said cholesterol doesn't matter, they are wrong, lmao!"

Right, there's way too much sperging on which diets are the best and if meat causes cancer and way too little laughing at retards on the lower-case I internet. Even if you like sunning your asshole or you're sympathetic towards keto or what have you, there's no need to feel personally attacked and jump into the thread to defend your pet theories. Also, as you say, "these people are dumb because they are WRONG" isn't funny, so sperging about diet from the other side of the aisle is equally unfun.

They should make a containment thread in Health & Fitness or in Debates. It could be fun.

 

[MS Paint Gigachad]

@ITK You couldn't have helped me introduce this any better

Sauce https://www.reddit.com/r/carnivore/...ne_have_stubbornly_low_free_t4_and_t3_levels/
Archive https://archive.ph/jCt2C
Like fuck, I knew this was a fat-heavy diet. I just wasnt expecting it to be that fucking much. Holy hell.

 

[Skeletonized Cow]

@ITK You couldn't have helped me introduce this any better
View attachment 4620722
Sauce https://www.reddit.com/r/carnivore/...ne_have_stubbornly_low_free_t4_and_t3_levels/
Archive https://archive.ph/jCt2C
Like fuck, I knew this was a fat-heavy diet. I just wasnt expecting it to be that fucking much. Holy hell.

>75% fat

Honestly, how? Fat alone is disgusting, and so many of these weirdos refuse to season it or anything.

Anywho, these spergs are really annoying. For a while, I was eating a majority-meat diet (because I'm a retard) and when I was trying to research help in regards to fixing my diet, these knuckleheads kept clogging up my search results.

Between these guys and vegans, I unironically don't think there's any good dietary advice being spread by normies on the internet anymore.

 

[MS Paint Gigachad]

>75% fat

Honestly, how? Fat alone is disgusting, and so many of these weirdos refuse to season it or anything.

Other than something ridiculous like tallow, heavy cream or butter by the spoonful, I don't know, and I wanna know too.
Here's a question for us: What is the leanest piece of meat that contains 75+% of its calories in fat?
The short answer: There's really only pork belly. Ribeye steak (consider the following: the 21st century cow has probably been raised to increase the fat content. A 10,000BC wild buffalo on the other hand...) and mackerel (I thought fish were lean!?) barely miss the mark. Leaner cuts of beef, lamb, goat, eggs, other fish and seafood, and poultry (turkey, chicken, duck) are right out.

Spoiler: The Long Answer

Fat has about 9 calories on the gram. Do some math. For our question, for every 100 calories a product has per serving, 75 have to come from fat. Thusly, there have to be 8.33 grams of fat per 100 calories for it to pass. I plugged a bunch of numbers and math into a spreadsheet.

Thusly, the only way to do that shit is to supplement with cream, butter, tallow, or any other source of animal fat. You could probably get away with some of that shit by slathering your meats with bearnaise sauce or something of that nature, but you wouldnt just need to domesticate animals for milk, but you'd need A LOT of them. This is NOT PRIMAL.

Anywho, these spergs are really annoying. For a while, I was eating a majority-meat diet (because I'm a retard) and when I was trying to research help in regards to fixing my diet, these knuckleheads kept clogging up my search results.

What was it like? From what I hear the usual solution offered is to just double down

Between these guys and vegans, I unironically don't think there's any good dietary advice being spread by normies on the internet anymore.

There's still people like Dr Adrian Chavez or Dr Layne Norton. But still, Feels.

 

[Skeletonized Cow]

What was it like? From what I hear the usual solution offered is to just double down

I was more on the the "eat less carbohydrates/sugars" part of the whole carnivore/primal diet communities, than a full devotee, and I didn't go for the "no plants, only fatty, red meat" shit. I was mostly eating lean meats, poultry and fish, and still eating low carb veggies.

Even then, trying to research dietary recommendations was a pain in the ass. The whole "you feel like shit because of the veggies bro" or occasionally stumbling upon the vegan "it's the meat bro" was quite annoying. And it only got more frustrating as I got to experiencing stomach trouble as time went on. And I never properly "doubled down" as recommended because anytime I tried to substitute in fatty meats, I got sick as well.

As it turns out, the real trouble was fodmap insensitivity. It was something brought up by carnivores, but because of all the other bullshit surrounding it, I had dismissed it along with all the other shit. It's something that, to be honest, is probably the source of the stomach problems a lot of carnivores complain about when they eat plants.

There's still people like Dr Adrian Chavez or Dr Layne Norton. But still, Feels.

True, there are a lot of good resources still out there, but if one is like me (retarded) then there a lot of ways to get stuck in a bubble surrounded by shitty advice. Not knowing what to look for, and grasping at straws is a quick way to end up in a shittier situation.