- Joined
- Sep 30, 2016
I never imagined that one day this thread would give me a massive boner.
Megathread SRS and GRS surgeons and associated horrors - the medical community of experimental surgeons, the secret community of home butchers
- Thread starter cuddle striker
- Start date
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Lady Farishta
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jul 6, 2022
awww bro your lil dick is adorbs
- Joined
- Jul 4, 2022
Its bc the lil pooners are pathetic incarnate. We have a tendency to want to protect/pity pathetic little creatures. They remind me of chihuahuas. A whole lotta yap, but ultimately harmless, and so goddamn ugly they become kinda cute in a way.
Just to be clear im talkin about the meme, not the actual FtMs they are parodying, those are just gross.
sheepworldvizor
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Apr 28, 2022
Pooner, and more specifically ‘lil pooner’ undercuts the faux machismo posturing of so many FTMs. It reduces them to an essence of immaturity and unattainable manhood.
Forever cute (something associated with women), and forever little (to be cared for but ultimately ignored).
I have yet to find a better descriptor that summarizes their deep self-hatred better.
Forever cute (something associated with women), and forever little (to be cared for but ultimately ignored).
I have yet to find a better descriptor that summarizes their deep self-hatred better.
- Joined
- Mar 30, 2021
Some of these surgeries are so bad I have no idea wtf I'm looking at anymore. Just mutilated holes and skin.
- Joined
- Sep 30, 2016
I'm talking about the picture on the right you bunch of retards,
YourFriendlyLurker 2.0
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 12, 2022
The association of people unironically believeing that human genitalia is a constructor.2-3 weeks post opOne Trans* Man's Simple Metoidioplasty
mysimplemeta.blogspot.com
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3 months
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1 yearView attachment 4663921
double butt
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I think the dick may be rotting off
crowding
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https://www.reddit.com/r/Alilofeverything/comments/11dsui6/pretty_boi/ the water droplet thing
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NuParts is sort of the "celebrity" in this hellhole, he is a salmacian hermaphrodite who is also a plural DID larper, referring himself as "we" so he follows the mythos the closest, and literally identifies as 2 people
Nu's reddit page
Nu's website
chin
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Dilator squish
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-<
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Looks like the labia's eating the balls
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creampie
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Miscellaneous
- Joined
- Apr 22, 2022
For those keeping score, genericusername4582 has deleted her Reddit account. Her old Tumblr blog is still up.
She was one of the people we know to have had phalloplasty while still a child.
She was one of the people we know to have had phalloplasty while still a child.
- Joined
- Sep 15, 2016
In most of the studies that are quoted for “low post surgery regret”, a large number of study participants just drop out. (Since the study usually follows SRS patients over a number of years).
Kinda like this chick has just deleted most of her online presence.
In the studies they’re not counted as troons who regret, but if a patient just drops out of a study, clearly things aren’t going swimmingly.
Just in case you were wondering where those “only 1% regret SRS” comes from.
- Joined
- Jul 19, 2019
This is something Jesse Singal has a whole chunk of his brain devoted to sperging about.
IIRC it's usually about a third of the patients lost to follow up, which is a lot.
Did they detransition? Did they 41%? Are they 100% cis-passing and they're so stealth now that the idea of keeping touch with the gender clinic seems as laughable as keeping touch with a dentist who filled a cavity 10 years ago? Are they in jail?
You can make up any story you want.
- Joined
- Oct 6, 2021
This. The meme creatures I find cute and neat, like ugly puppies, and they perfectly encapsulate the absolute pointlessness and pathetic nature of FtM's existence, doomed to be insignificant, tiny manlets so weak that even the most soy filled man out man's them just by the very nature of being an actual male, the same way the most "passing" MtF is a blocky fridge bodied caricature of femininity that is rendered a joke by even the plainest and most homely woman by the very nature of being female.
Pooners are extreme satire, rendered even more brutal by the knowledge they are created by other self hating TiFs to shit on fellow TiFs.
The memes are cute and pathetic.
The actual FtMs that the meme represents, such as Ellen Page, are dirisible and contemptible, just kind of sad and gross.
- Joined
- Sep 27, 2020
Can't quote the post unfortunately, but since the last u/stupidstories (AKA Sharky) update, he has decided to detrans! What a wild ride.
Here he is now looking totally normal; I hope he can move on despite the SRS.
link, archive
Not sure if these have been posted so figured I'd drop them here for posterity. He had SRS and BA but no FFS.
link, archive
Apparently after 2 revisions things improved with his SRS.
link, archive comments (can't seem to make archive with image gallery work)
Here he is now looking totally normal; I hope he can move on despite the SRS.
Not sure if these have been posted so figured I'd drop them here for posterity. He had SRS and BA but no FFS.
Apparently after 2 revisions things improved with his SRS.
unexpected onions
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Sep 30, 2022
At least his username fits all this.
- Joined
- Mar 30, 2021
Literally looks like the raw chicken/turkey meme. Jesus christ just a dark cavity,
- Joined
- Feb 12, 2019
The truly sad thing is that wound is one of the better results in this thread
- Joined
- Jun 21, 2022
I found another surgery blog:
gmanphalloblog.home.blog
I enjoy this one because of all the peeing issues and the hilarious FUPA-phallo you will see in the pics.
From her about me:
I am pursuing RFF phalloplasty, scrotoplasty, and glansplasty with urethral lengthening (UL), but without vaginectomy. This is definitely not something for everyone, but I have had no dysphoria issues pertaining to my vagina ever since I had my hysterectomy. My main issue was I had bad endometriosis that gave waves to pain that were on and off that varied from mild to severe, but constantly made me aware of aspects of myself I did not like. After removing the pain, I have allowed myself to become more in tune with my body and accept it. I am not against getting vaginectomy in the future if complications of phallo are too great. And I am aware of the risks of complications arise far more with RFF phallo without vaginectomy, but that can be remedied in stage two if need be. I figure right now: if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.
I’m excited. I’m nervous. I’m anxious. I’m frustrated. I’m scared. I’m ready for that sweet eight hour nap and to wake up and feel complete. I’ve felt so many emotions the last month now that everything is coming together and feeling real that it feels like my head is constantly on fire and I can never truly describe what I’m feeling to anyone and I’m hoping to remedy it here.
Pre-Op laser: "In total I had eleven laser treatments once a month starting in February of 2020. In January we switched to electrolysis every other week for three appointments. I have a few hairs left I would like to get rid of, but there is a two week cut off from any treatments on my donor arm from my surgeon."
Pre-Op appointment: "I expect things to probably go wrong, but it’ll be alright. It was just good for the both of us to just hear that, know it, and accept it. The worst thing being that I will probably develop a fistula due to not having a vaginectomy (about a 60% chance from his own statistics), but it could heal all on its own or we may be back in six months to fix it. Either is okay."
the next day they redress the wound and it's not as smelly.
My dick itself is looking and smelling better!
The other test has been trying to use my vagina. That has truly been a pain. So since the more elastic parts of my zone were harvested for my balls, my vaginal entrance was connected again with regular surrounding skin in the area. So since regular skin doesn’t provide as much stretch and the scarring is very intensive since I haven’t been massaging or anything yet due to my fistula, that sucker is tight as hell at the entrance. I can fit barely my pinkie in and it’s not the best feeling as of yet. The rest of my vagina is intact and hopefully that means some of my toys will be an option again in the future, but right now I am waiting on a dilator set to come in so I can try improving and working my way back up to a decent size.
Dealing with the fistula for almost 6 months now has been so tedious as it is and now I have to wait even longer still. I don’t even know when Santucci will have an opening so 3/8 is just the earliest I can grab theoretically, it would be even longer. It’s been mentally draining constantly being on pee watch to make sure I’m not leaking too bad and I just want it to be fixed and over so I can stand to pee like I truly want and need.
So for what actually happened with surgery: got the lipo with the fat grafting no problem, my glans was redone and is still all bandaged up but I’m sure he looks fine, fistula was closed up, but for my stricture repair my complications were too severe for a simple buccal graft and had impromptu staged stricture repair that opened up the stricture so I’ll have a hole at the base of my dick to pee out of with the need for another surgery to close that in the future so I can actually pee with my dick.
Now for something that WAS dramatic and incredible traumatic. This is a big disphoria warning about my vag. So I did notice the other day there was some gauze in there and left it for the surgeon to remove since it was uncomfortable when I tugged. So I pointed it out to Santucci while he was looking at everything else. He noted that that should be removed and then proceeded to yank out about eight fucking feet of a roll of bloody gauze that was shoved in my vagina I’m the spam of what felt like forever but was probably about ten seconds. It just kept coming out. It felt indescribably bad. There was a splatter of blood that cascaded out with it. It literally felt like a nightmare.
Now that I am voiding with this new hole Santucci made, peeing really is a weird experience. It’s so messy since the hole comes out at the base of my balls and shaft so everything gets a nice splash when I have to go. And since the hole is now perpendicular and not horizontal, I have peed through the rim of the toilet so many times by accident and onto the floor. I’m glad I just took the extra time off work to just learn how to pee again since this is just a wild concept. In the last two weeks alone I’ve had to clean the bathroom more times than I have since I moved into my house a few years ago so my wife appreciates that.
After the last post, a few weeks later my dick had swollen to a ridiculous amount and was just so hard and firm to the touch.[...] It was truly a shitty week. Santucci thinks I probably had a staph infection which is probable since I managed to yank out a stitch after the antibiotics finally kicked in that was irritating the hell out of my dick.
[...] I have a little calcified spot in my arm from the last fat grafting which he’ll take out and hopefully fill out more of the problem areas so it has a smother glide so it’s less stuck to my arm. All in all, my arm looks fantastic for what’s happened to it, but I have enough hand issues as it is.
The IV site from the last surgery really did mess up my hand. It took months for most of the sensation to come back, and even still, I still don’t have full sensation in my pinky finger anymore. [...]
One more day to go!
I’m so ready for this surgery, it’s felt like a long time coming. Being able to pee standing up after almost two years will feel like heaven and that’s still going to be a few more weeks. The game plan tomorrow sounds simple enough.
Going to close up the two holes that I currently pee out of and should just be good to pee after I have the sp catheter taken out in three weeks of surgery.
All in all, things look good! I really do appreciate Santucci and his work, he’s a nice dude that definitely aims to help. I’m glad my balls are back together, although it looks a little odd right now but that’s just what stitches do. My glans looks real good and tigher so hopefully it keeps things in place where they need to be.
.... and no more updates since November 2022. I'm sure by now she can definitely stand to pee without having to clean up the whole bathroom, sit down to work without pain, use her hands perfectly, and penetrate her they/them wife.
gmanphalloblog.home.blog
From her about me:
I am pursuing RFF phalloplasty, scrotoplasty, and glansplasty with urethral lengthening (UL), but without vaginectomy. This is definitely not something for everyone, but I have had no dysphoria issues pertaining to my vagina ever since I had my hysterectomy. My main issue was I had bad endometriosis that gave waves to pain that were on and off that varied from mild to severe, but constantly made me aware of aspects of myself I did not like. After removing the pain, I have allowed myself to become more in tune with my body and accept it. I am not against getting vaginectomy in the future if complications of phallo are too great. And I am aware of the risks of complications arise far more with RFF phallo without vaginectomy, but that can be remedied in stage two if need be. I figure right now: if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.
It begins… february 27, 2021
So it begins.I’m excited. I’m nervous. I’m anxious. I’m frustrated. I’m scared. I’m ready for that sweet eight hour nap and to wake up and feel complete. I’ve felt so many emotions the last month now that everything is coming together and feeling real that it feels like my head is constantly on fire and I can never truly describe what I’m feeling to anyone and I’m hoping to remedy it here.
And yet, now I’m less than ten days out from having it and it’s finally starting to feel real.
I say I never felt like I would even contemplate phallo in the past, but the last three years have been hitting hard, specifically the last two. Voiding in the bathroom is a mind numbing five minute process just to get things moving I feel so disconnected with my current junk. People in public restrooms also make it worse. The sound of someone sitting verse the urinal just sounded deafening at work with it impossible to find a private stall in a busy hospital. The only time going to the bathroom is easy is when I’m in the shower. And bless my wife for coming up with the simple solution, even if it’s not perfect, of just peeing in the shower so I can have the ability to stand while I do so. They even got me a transthetic EZP which felt amazing for the shower. Unfortunately, I was always too nervous (and too thicc) to use it in public for it to be practical outside of some reprieve and something to look forward to at home.
So the answer went into more research. I always assumed at the beginning of my journey that phalloplasty was a joke to torment me on what I thought I could never have. From people saying the look, feel, use, etc. is “wrong”. I bought into the superficial propaganda I saw floating around on the early 2010s internet and pushed it out of my mind. But I finally started looking into reputable doctors on the possible procedures. What really helped was the personal experiences, stories, and pictures of other folks going throught similar experiences. That is why I think it’s important for me to not only get an outlet for my struggle (or lack there of ideally), but so others can see and learn about my account first hand.
After a lot of thought and research on what I want and what I want to achieve. My dick goals are: standing to pee, sensation/ penetrative sex, and over all aesthetic in that order. Ideally around 5-6 inches in length, leaning toward the longer side, and 4-5 inches in circumference.
I say I never felt like I would even contemplate phallo in the past, but the last three years have been hitting hard, specifically the last two. Voiding in the bathroom is a mind numbing five minute process just to get things moving I feel so disconnected with my current junk. People in public restrooms also make it worse. The sound of someone sitting verse the urinal just sounded deafening at work with it impossible to find a private stall in a busy hospital. The only time going to the bathroom is easy is when I’m in the shower. And bless my wife for coming up with the simple solution, even if it’s not perfect, of just peeing in the shower so I can have the ability to stand while I do so. They even got me a transthetic EZP which felt amazing for the shower. Unfortunately, I was always too nervous (and too thicc) to use it in public for it to be practical outside of some reprieve and something to look forward to at home.
So the answer went into more research. I always assumed at the beginning of my journey that phalloplasty was a joke to torment me on what I thought I could never have. From people saying the look, feel, use, etc. is “wrong”. I bought into the superficial propaganda I saw floating around on the early 2010s internet and pushed it out of my mind. But I finally started looking into reputable doctors on the possible procedures. What really helped was the personal experiences, stories, and pictures of other folks going throught similar experiences. That is why I think it’s important for me to not only get an outlet for my struggle (or lack there of ideally), but so others can see and learn about my account first hand.
After a lot of thought and research on what I want and what I want to achieve. My dick goals are: standing to pee, sensation/ penetrative sex, and over all aesthetic in that order. Ideally around 5-6 inches in length, leaning toward the longer side, and 4-5 inches in circumference.
Pre-Op laser: "In total I had eleven laser treatments once a month starting in February of 2020. In January we switched to electrolysis every other week for three appointments. I have a few hairs left I would like to get rid of, but there is a two week cut off from any treatments on my donor arm from my surgeon."
Pre-Op appointment: "I expect things to probably go wrong, but it’ll be alright. It was just good for the both of us to just hear that, know it, and accept it. The worst thing being that I will probably develop a fistula due to not having a vaginectomy (about a 60% chance from his own statistics), but it could heal all on its own or we may be back in six months to fix it. Either is okay."
Post-op day four (dick reveal!) march 12, 2021
Nurse and doc both said the dick looks amazing. One of the dope nurses here helped me measure and everything. I’m currently sitting at 5″ lengthwise and 5.25″ in girth around the midshaft. She said once the swelling goes down the girth will decrease a bit, but I am definitely gonna be looking at a 5.5-6″ dick in the future!
Post-op day seven march 16, 2021
While trying to go earlier I accidentally voided mostly through the base of my balls, but dribbled a bit through my dick. That was a frustrating mixture of annoyance and sadness. I knew to expect something like this, but it feels too early especially which how everyone was saying everything looked amazing. And I do know on the other hand it is too early to lead to judgements. It’s only day seven.Post-op day eight march 17, 2021
I’m hoping to regain more feeling in my thumb, but I had de quervain’s tenosynovitis and slight carpal tunnel so those could have been exasperated. That was definitely expected if anything.
Post op day nine march 18, 2021
Post-op day twenty march 28, 2021
I’ve definitely started becoming more sensative to my wound smells and it’s nauseating beyond reason. My dick has a smell, but not nearly as disgusting as what’s coming from my arm.I at least know it’s just my body over reacting. My wife has a super nose and can smell a cat peed outside of the box two rooms away and she says it has a smell, but definitely not what I’m describing. I normally have an iron stomach too and I’m surprised I need the anti-nausea medication. It’s been making bandage changes of the arm difficult just to tolerate the smell.
The other annoying thing is my arm again besides the smell. Currently, my arm looks disgusting. Rationally, I know it looks healthy, pink, and moist so it’s doing it’s thing healing! But at the same time, it’s peeking which looks so questionable especially knowing how thin the skin is. And the seem down the middle of my graft has peeled and exposed what I hope is just the healing skin. But it just looks so questionable and gross. The doctor’s office just said to baby it the other day when it was just starting, but now it just looks so bad yet I want to say it’s fine. It’s frustrating and I’ll post pics below to show what I mean. If anyone else what’s to validate what a three weeks post op arm looks like that would be so appreciated. I just want to know I’m not crazy. Definitely know it is gonna look worse before it looks better, but it’s such a large area it makes me paranoid.
Other than that, my junk is fine, just very drippy lately which is also gross, but that I am definitely more fine with. I’ll be doing my voiding trial soon and hopefully that’ll help clear it out a bit.
The other annoying thing is my arm again besides the smell. Currently, my arm looks disgusting. Rationally, I know it looks healthy, pink, and moist so it’s doing it’s thing healing! But at the same time, it’s peeking which looks so questionable especially knowing how thin the skin is. And the seem down the middle of my graft has peeled and exposed what I hope is just the healing skin. But it just looks so questionable and gross. The doctor’s office just said to baby it the other day when it was just starting, but now it just looks so bad yet I want to say it’s fine. It’s frustrating and I’ll post pics below to show what I mean. If anyone else what’s to validate what a three weeks post op arm looks like that would be so appreciated. I just want to know I’m not crazy. Definitely know it is gonna look worse before it looks better, but it’s such a large area it makes me paranoid.
Other than that, my junk is fine, just very drippy lately which is also gross, but that I am definitely more fine with. I’ll be doing my voiding trial soon and hopefully that’ll help clear it out a bit.
Post op day twenty seven april 4, 2021
I know the smell and drip of my dick of my dick was making me feel really dejected yesterday. I know realistically it’ll be over soon, but god damn does it still take a toll mentally especially when the smell just is so wrong. I just need the smell to at least go back to the healing dick smell. I can deal with that.Post-op day thirty one april 8, 2021
My fistula is basically the same. Going primarily behind my balls with some consistent drips from my dick. I’ve been packing the area with abd pads hoping it’ll heal on its own. We shall see on that.My dick itself is looking and smelling better!
I took out a lot of sutures over the last week. My tip has a pretty big indent right now and scabbing, but I’m pretty sure that’ll correct itself soon. That and my glans was definitely irritated with those in and they were coming out slowly on their own. It just looks a lot less gross and less oozy now. The base of my dick has been getting medihoney for some of the gaps and it’s filling in nicely.
One weird thing I’m still getting use to is gravity pulling on my pelvis now. Slightly uncomfortable just because of nerves reconnecting. But speaking of nerves, good god I finally got off yesterday after a month of abstinence basically and it was pure Bliss. Basically just used my new shaft to stimulate my buried dick for now. I did not expect it to feel that amazing and it just felt better due to it feeling right. Like jacking myself off with a dick was a motion I should have been doing the entire time. It felt right and made it feel all the better. But also I know it was waaaay too early healing wise to do that so I am going to abstain for another month which will be hell now that I know how good it’s going to be. But for real, definitely wait at least 6 to 8 weeks unlike my dumb ass.
One weird thing I’m still getting use to is gravity pulling on my pelvis now. Slightly uncomfortable just because of nerves reconnecting. But speaking of nerves, good god I finally got off yesterday after a month of abstinence basically and it was pure Bliss. Basically just used my new shaft to stimulate my buried dick for now. I did not expect it to feel that amazing and it just felt better due to it feeling right. Like jacking myself off with a dick was a motion I should have been doing the entire time. It felt right and made it feel all the better. But also I know it was waaaay too early healing wise to do that so I am going to abstain for another month which will be hell now that I know how good it’s going to be. But for real, definitely wait at least 6 to 8 weeks unlike my dumb ass.
Post-op day forty two april 19, 2021
The very strong urine smell before still slightly persists, but has gotten a lot better. I think it was just the tip of my phallus that was the issue. The urine beside my balls does not have the smell while drips from my dick do. It was having a harder time healing since my dick would drip a lot and the moisture wasn’t helping it. I’ve been wrapping that area up and it is looking much better. Hopefully the dripping itself will stop, but I’m sure internally there is still enough trying to heal in there contributing to it.Post-Op Day 80 may 27, 2021
The other big issue I was talking about last time was the fistula. I actually did go into the shower with a mirror to verify it absolutely is “somewhere” in my vagina to watch me pee. I couldn’t see an opening at all exteriorly, but it’s somewhere in there. Still occasionally while I wipe there’s blood in that area, but unfortunately the fistula is an open wound that I have to take care of.
Post Op Day 112 june 28, 2021
Only complaint right now besides the obvious fistula is just me sitting at work. I can definitely feel pressure and pain from that area every time I sit on those hard ass chairs. I make so many old man grunts sitting, especially since I am up and down a lot on my toes. Thankfully my work has a decent amount of noise and I can muffle my old man sounds enough.
Post Op Day 128 july 14, 2021
I’m slowly beginning to feel more normal at work. Which is great, but unfortunately my fistula is still making sitting down hella uncomfortable so I still make a lot of old man grunts when I take a seat. My range of motion on my donor arm is fantastic. I was doing well edema wise in my hand too last week, but it came back pretty fierce this week so that’s still hit or miss.The other test has been trying to use my vagina. That has truly been a pain. So since the more elastic parts of my zone were harvested for my balls, my vaginal entrance was connected again with regular surrounding skin in the area. So since regular skin doesn’t provide as much stretch and the scarring is very intensive since I haven’t been massaging or anything yet due to my fistula, that sucker is tight as hell at the entrance. I can fit barely my pinkie in and it’s not the best feeling as of yet. The rest of my vagina is intact and hopefully that means some of my toys will be an option again in the future, but right now I am waiting on a dilator set to come in so I can try improving and working my way back up to a decent size.
Post Op Day 160 august 15, 2021
Biggest thing has been dealing with leaking issues from my fistula. I’ll have drips occasionally from my dick which is honestly minimal in comparison so the leaking from my fistula. For the most part just walking and running is totally fine. I can twist my body and it would be okay. As soon as I have to bend, sit, squat, or lay down is when I’ll have a sudden leak that I consciously need to focus on to mitigate problems. I’ve started wearing some incontinence pads and reminding myself they’re for that so I won’t have wet underwear constantly. It’s just mentally really taxing while I wait to get things fixed.
Post Op Day 166
august 21, 2021Dealing with the fistula for almost 6 months now has been so tedious as it is and now I have to wait even longer still. I don’t even know when Santucci will have an opening so 3/8 is just the earliest I can grab theoretically, it would be even longer. It’s been mentally draining constantly being on pee watch to make sure I’m not leaking too bad and I just want it to be fixed and over so I can stand to pee like I truly want and need.
I know it was my choice to go this route, it’s still frustrating. And I feel worse complaining just because I do have the luxury of having an insurance that will pay for this and having benefits at work that allow me to do so.
I’m trying to look on the brighter side like maybe I could get my dick tattooed beforehand if there’s enough time difference before my glans revision. My work insurance will also be changing different insurers. It’ll still cover the same benefits, but at least it’ll give the Crane Center’s coverage office some time to work out the kinks and make sure things are set up since I know it’ll still probably be a hassle and I’ll have it for more than a month beforehand.
I just need to try and keep my mind off the fistula, but it is increasingly harder with it kinda grating on me. I’ve been trying to branch out on support groups, but it’s also been kinda hard. Love my wife to death, but they suck at empathy normally and this is all so out there that they don’t really know how to best support me and I don’t even know what would be best either.
I’m trying to look on the brighter side like maybe I could get my dick tattooed beforehand if there’s enough time difference before my glans revision. My work insurance will also be changing different insurers. It’ll still cover the same benefits, but at least it’ll give the Crane Center’s coverage office some time to work out the kinks and make sure things are set up since I know it’ll still probably be a hassle and I’ll have it for more than a month beforehand.
I just need to try and keep my mind off the fistula, but it is increasingly harder with it kinda grating on me. I’ve been trying to branch out on support groups, but it’s also been kinda hard. Love my wife to death, but they suck at empathy normally and this is all so out there that they don’t really know how to best support me and I don’t even know what would be best either.
Post Op Day 178 september 2, 2021
I am going to be talking to Santucci tomorrow to discuss adding a glans revision. There’s barely any ridge on the head of my dick and, aesthetically speaking, I would really like one. Although with how I normally don’t scar up, that just might be a factor against me on why it flattened out so fast. He said to shoot a message later the last time we talked if that was a for sure thing that will need to be done in the future and I think it is. Might as well get all the bells and whistles I canwhen I finally get time off again. [...]
Speaking of fun and exciting though, I have been slowly upping my game again with dilating. I’m so close to being able to take on my more “average” sized toys which I was going to be so mad if I shrank so much. My more size-queen adventurous toys are still daunting, but looking like it’ll be more manageable in the near future! And a side note, I never realized just how hard it is to take pictures of the nether zone especially when you’re on the thicker side.
Speaking of fun and exciting though, I have been slowly upping my game again with dilating. I’m so close to being able to take on my more “average” sized toys which I was going to be so mad if I shrank so much. My more size-queen adventurous toys are still daunting, but looking like it’ll be more manageable in the near future! And a side note, I never realized just how hard it is to take pictures of the nether zone especially when you’re on the thicker side.
Post-Op Day 189 september 13, 2021
Anyways: I have a stricture! Yay more annoying complications! Santucci said on the phone I might have one, but I definitely confirmed it while irrigating. Since I haven’t been voiding from my actual dick, he suggested I irrigate with a cath syringe and some soapy water every other day. Theoretically, it should have been a dinged up hose situation since the fistula is so large I’m only peeing through it when I’m passing the water through my dick. But when I was irrigating, which wasn’t that unpleasant up until 10 mL in, there was a sharp pain at the base of my balls and no more water would pass through. It should have emptied from the fistula if there was no problem, but I think I have a total stricture at the junction which is probably what caused the fistula to begin with.It sucks, and honestly I grieved having to get a more complicated surgery the past week. It’s okay to feel shitty about the situation even when I knew it could be coming. It sucks, but I knew what I was getting into. I know my wife jokes that I asked for this when I get down and feel lousy. And I did and I wouldn’t change it for the world. Santucci was already adding possible stricture repair to the list of demands for the 1.5 stage fix. Ideally if it’s not too big of a repair for the stricture I should still be able to get my balls put in. Unfortunately since they need to be put in while in a super clean environment that the nature of the stricture will really factor in on whether or not that’ll it’ll be acceptable. I’m really hoping that it’s easy fix, slap some buccal in there and call it a day and go home feeling mostly whole. I know to plan for the worst though and that’s fine too. Wants and hopes don’t have to be the same.
Post Op Day 276 december 9, 2021
I was dealing with some confidence issues with my scars and coming to terms with it. I mean, scars honestly don’t bother me that much and I have been fortunate to scar fairly well. The underside of my dick left much to be desired though for me and I’ve been doing my best the last couple months to massage and work out the scar tissue.[...]
Surprisingly for me though, my arm has been bugging me. The scars look great, but the indent has really started to bug me so I’m looking into fat grafting for that as long as my insurance will allow it. I did have another talk with Dr. Santucci last week about it and he was really helpful in asking questions and trying to make sure that it can be covered as medically necessary at the same time as my repair surgery. I still have some movement and edema issues with my arm being a bit too tight. He wouldn’t be preforming the lipo and fat injections, but a plastic surgeon would while he worked on all the urological problems. Nice news is that I can get lipo anywhere with excess fat and fortunately I have plenty to choose from. I’m probably going to be taking from my love handles or hips to kinda straighten out my profile that way. My body might reabsorb some of the fat, but even if it reabsorbed 50%, that’s still would be a big difference in my arm as opposed to not having any. Santucci is really good at bringing up those points and makes me more comfortable with bringing any sort of issues to mind that he can address. I noticed a bit ago that I had a lil dog ear on my balls and he is totally cool with just snipping that off while he fixes everything else up.
The other part of the call was confirming glans revision, but more importantly was the updated stricture information with him and committing to that game plan. Since we will definitely be taking a buccal graft, he’s going to harvest some extra to reinforce the fistula at the same time to really make sure everything is super patched up. It does mean I will for sure not be getting balls in at the same time, but at least that would be an easy standalone surgery I won’t need extended time off for. I’m just ready for all the urological things to be taken care of so I can maybe not have to be completely paranoid about peeing.
[...]
All the peeing issues is mentally taxing, even if mine seem so benign since I’m fortunate enough to not need a suprapubic tube to urinate. I just lucked out with the stricture in such a way my body made the fistula. It works, but man am I just ready to learn how to use a urinal dammit. Just 90 more days away before I can hopefully move on to that goal.
Surprisingly for me though, my arm has been bugging me. The scars look great, but the indent has really started to bug me so I’m looking into fat grafting for that as long as my insurance will allow it. I did have another talk with Dr. Santucci last week about it and he was really helpful in asking questions and trying to make sure that it can be covered as medically necessary at the same time as my repair surgery. I still have some movement and edema issues with my arm being a bit too tight. He wouldn’t be preforming the lipo and fat injections, but a plastic surgeon would while he worked on all the urological problems. Nice news is that I can get lipo anywhere with excess fat and fortunately I have plenty to choose from. I’m probably going to be taking from my love handles or hips to kinda straighten out my profile that way. My body might reabsorb some of the fat, but even if it reabsorbed 50%, that’s still would be a big difference in my arm as opposed to not having any. Santucci is really good at bringing up those points and makes me more comfortable with bringing any sort of issues to mind that he can address. I noticed a bit ago that I had a lil dog ear on my balls and he is totally cool with just snipping that off while he fixes everything else up.
The other part of the call was confirming glans revision, but more importantly was the updated stricture information with him and committing to that game plan. Since we will definitely be taking a buccal graft, he’s going to harvest some extra to reinforce the fistula at the same time to really make sure everything is super patched up. It does mean I will for sure not be getting balls in at the same time, but at least that would be an easy standalone surgery I won’t need extended time off for. I’m just ready for all the urological things to be taken care of so I can maybe not have to be completely paranoid about peeing.
[...]
All the peeing issues is mentally taxing, even if mine seem so benign since I’m fortunate enough to not need a suprapubic tube to urinate. I just lucked out with the stricture in such a way my body made the fistula. It works, but man am I just ready to learn how to use a urinal dammit. Just 90 more days away before I can hopefully move on to that goal.
Post Op Day 281 december 14, 2021
Been on antibiotics for a few days and just finished them up for a UTI.Post Op Day 364 march 7, 2022
Stage 1.5 Post Op Day 5 march 16, 2022
Post Op Stage 1 – 1 Year and 7 DaysSo for what actually happened with surgery: got the lipo with the fat grafting no problem, my glans was redone and is still all bandaged up but I’m sure he looks fine, fistula was closed up, but for my stricture repair my complications were too severe for a simple buccal graft and had impromptu staged stricture repair that opened up the stricture so I’ll have a hole at the base of my dick to pee out of with the need for another surgery to close that in the future so I can actually pee with my dick.
So the ideal way would have been the simple buccal fix that they would have put in and closed, and hopefully been good enough to go that no other needed surgery for that had all gone well and to plan. But with scoping Santucci saw it was bad enough that it would be safer to preemptively go the two stage route for the fix and take a full thickness graft from my side instead to monitor and make sure things keep open. I trust him in that regard and if that’s the course of action that needed to take place so be it. I was mostly taken aback because even before going into surgery he was trying to hype up that I might not even need a stricture repair and it could all just be fistula problems and I think that just caught me off guard enough to shake me since I was really hoping my timeline only included one more surgery and now it’s at least two. Not to mention the big fact that I already waited a year to get the chance to pee like I want to only for it to remain a mystery of whether or not I’ll be able to pee standing up this year too.
I had a hard time coping with this intially, especially the second day off when I was finally able to see the damage because it looked gaustly to even me. I loved how my balls looked before and they are so smashed and opened up now for the stricture repair pee spot that it really hit me hard that I lost so much progress and I just could not imagine things being fixed. It was incredibly rough and I cried while I texted my wife since they’re back home. Not having that support person there with me right then really hurt as well. I’ll see them soon, but it’s felt like ages. I really am just exhausted mentally this time around from the surprise, but hopefully that just means next time will be easier and less barriers in the way.
I had a hard time coping with this intially, especially the second day off when I was finally able to see the damage because it looked gaustly to even me. I loved how my balls looked before and they are so smashed and opened up now for the stricture repair pee spot that it really hit me hard that I lost so much progress and I just could not imagine things being fixed. It was incredibly rough and I cried while I texted my wife since they’re back home. Not having that support person there with me right then really hurt as well. I’ll see them soon, but it’s felt like ages. I really am just exhausted mentally this time around from the surprise, but hopefully that just means next time will be easier and less barriers in the way.
Stage 1.5 Post Op Day 5 march 16, 2022
Stage 1 Post Op 1 Year and 8 DaysNow for something that WAS dramatic and incredible traumatic. This is a big disphoria warning about my vag. So I did notice the other day there was some gauze in there and left it for the surgeon to remove since it was uncomfortable when I tugged. So I pointed it out to Santucci while he was looking at everything else. He noted that that should be removed and then proceeded to yank out about eight fucking feet of a roll of bloody gauze that was shoved in my vagina I’m the spam of what felt like forever but was probably about ten seconds. It just kept coming out. It felt indescribably bad. There was a splatter of blood that cascaded out with it. It literally felt like a nightmare.
And then they still needed to take the catheter out of my dick and that was truly fucking nothing compared to the unimaginable horror story I just experienced. I was physically shaking and it explains exactly why sitting up the last week felt unbearable when you have an entire roll of fucking gauze shoved in your vag. I’m in disbelief and I can’t wait to work that out in therapy cause that was just beyond fucked up to experience. I don’t even know if that’s normal for a urethrovaginal fistula fix, but it sure as shit worked up my dysphoria on that just a bit while feeling like a clown is pulling out an endless string of hankerchiefs out of you. Now that fistula better stay fixed because I really don’t think I can mentally take that again.
Post Op Stage 1.5 Day 32 april 11, 2022
Post Op Stage 1 – 1 Year and 34 DaysNow that I am voiding with this new hole Santucci made, peeing really is a weird experience. It’s so messy since the hole comes out at the base of my balls and shaft so everything gets a nice splash when I have to go. And since the hole is now perpendicular and not horizontal, I have peed through the rim of the toilet so many times by accident and onto the floor. I’m glad I just took the extra time off work to just learn how to pee again since this is just a wild concept. In the last two weeks alone I’ve had to clean the bathroom more times than I have since I moved into my house a few years ago so my wife appreciates that.
Even with voiding being annoying I’m just glad I’m just closer to being able to actually use my dick to urinate. Standing to pee just feels so much better and much more natural for me than sitting. Although after the nth time of cleaning the toilet base I have been pessimistic and just wanting September to be here already. Just have to be patient. I know I’m already itching for implants, but that’s gonna be so far ahead in the future before I need to actively think about it.
Other minor things, I have slight wound seperation from a bad stitch on my incision line on my stomach. I absolutely couldn’t handle the sutures on my glans anymore and took them out since they were being so irritating. My glans looks really nice so far and I’ve been using xeroform to wrap it up since. Still have sutures from my fistula and stricture but those I’m more afraid to touch since the area is so sensitive. Just hoping they work their way out soon enough. My hand has been more annoying. The IV for my surgery was placed in my right hand and unfortunately they hit a nerve when they put it in. It’s been so fuzzy nerve wise since, but has been getting better. Originally my whole hand was just static, but after the first few days if just turned into full numbness in my ring and little fingwr. Now my little finger is still holding out like a little bastard, but I’m definitely getting more tactile sensations with it again. I did freak about that at first since my hand that already has enough nerve problems.
Other minor things, I have slight wound seperation from a bad stitch on my incision line on my stomach. I absolutely couldn’t handle the sutures on my glans anymore and took them out since they were being so irritating. My glans looks really nice so far and I’ve been using xeroform to wrap it up since. Still have sutures from my fistula and stricture but those I’m more afraid to touch since the area is so sensitive. Just hoping they work their way out soon enough. My hand has been more annoying. The IV for my surgery was placed in my right hand and unfortunately they hit a nerve when they put it in. It’s been so fuzzy nerve wise since, but has been getting better. Originally my whole hand was just static, but after the first few days if just turned into full numbness in my ring and little fingwr. Now my little finger is still holding out like a little bastard, but I’m definitely getting more tactile sensations with it again. I did freak about that at first since my hand that already has enough nerve problems.
Post Op Stage 1.5 Day 194 september 20, 2022
Post Op Stage 1 – 1 year 196 daysAfter the last post, a few weeks later my dick had swollen to a ridiculous amount and was just so hard and firm to the touch.[...] It was truly a shitty week. Santucci thinks I probably had a staph infection which is probable since I managed to yank out a stitch after the antibiotics finally kicked in that was irritating the hell out of my dick.
[...] I have a little calcified spot in my arm from the last fat grafting which he’ll take out and hopefully fill out more of the problem areas so it has a smother glide so it’s less stuck to my arm. All in all, my arm looks fantastic for what’s happened to it, but I have enough hand issues as it is.
The IV site from the last surgery really did mess up my hand. It took months for most of the sensation to come back, and even still, I still don’t have full sensation in my pinky finger anymore. [...]
Other things that are going to happen with the next surgery are a full glansplasty and mons lift. Unfortunately, my glans has flattened out again… But the next round instead of just rolling the area over, he’s going to use another graft which he’ll harvest from the mons lift and that’ll give it a better probability to keeping the shape I want. I do just want that nice defined head. It kept pretty well on one half, but the other said nah. Besides that, I just really want to be able to stand and pee before the two year mark of having a dick so I’m really hopeful and looking forward to that. And as long as everything is good there, then the next step will just be implants and I’m golden. But that’ll be further down the road. After all these surgeries I just want a break for a minute.
Post Op Stage 1.5 Day 235 october 31, 2022
Stage 1 Post Op: 1 Year 237 DaysOne more day to go!
I’m so ready for this surgery, it’s felt like a long time coming. Being able to pee standing up after almost two years will feel like heaven and that’s still going to be a few more weeks. The game plan tomorrow sounds simple enough.
Going to close up the two holes that I currently pee out of and should just be good to pee after I have the sp catheter taken out in three weeks of surgery.
My mons is going to be lifted up quite a bit. When I saw Dr. Santucci the other day he said everything looked real nice position wise while I was laying down and immediately said never mind when I stood up and gravity took a hold. Gravity is a bitch apparently. He gave me two options, one was a little smaller incision about 5 inches long, but there might be some puckering. The other option was about two inches longer on each side with no puckers and what I opted for. Go big or go home. I’m a big enough guy, I know I have some excess skin that I won’t miss. Just going to be another area to tattoo over in the future. While he’s there he’s also going to inject a keloid treatment for the underside of my shaft to help break up the clumpier scars.
[...]
I’m just so ready to not pee irradically all over the place because those two little holes have a mind of their own. I can deal with a sp tube for three weeks instead and then I’ll be able to finally pee barring no more complications or any more restrictive spots post cystoscopy.
[...]
I’m just so ready to not pee irradically all over the place because those two little holes have a mind of their own. I can deal with a sp tube for three weeks instead and then I’ll be able to finally pee barring no more complications or any more restrictive spots post cystoscopy.
Stage 2 Post Op Day 5 november 6, 2022
Stage 1 Post Op Year 1 Day 243All in all, things look good! I really do appreciate Santucci and his work, he’s a nice dude that definitely aims to help. I’m glad my balls are back together, although it looks a little odd right now but that’s just what stitches do. My glans looks real good and tigher so hopefully it keeps things in place where they need to be.
I got a kenalog injection on the underside of my dick closer to the tip where the incision was pretty stiff as opposed to the rest of my dick where it was softer and more maliable. The mons lift is definitely bigger than anticipated, but I’m assuming that during surgery it was just better placement with the wider cut. I’m a bigger guy so I expect a lot of excess skin to just kinda get yeeted. The granulated tissue on the outside of my vagina was taken care of and not plugged up with a whole roll of gauze which I repeated made sure that no one do that again. Definitely making some nasty healing goop in the meantime, but keeping an abd pad up there with some Neosporin so help heal.
On Mundinger’s side of things, he grafted some fat and shoved in into my arm and also took out a decent sized chunk that calcified from the last time. He warned he was going to have to cut in to get it which I figured, but it gives me piece of mind to know it’s gone and not have a random hard lump in there.
On Mundinger’s side of things, he grafted some fat and shoved in into my arm and also took out a decent sized chunk that calcified from the last time. He warned he was going to have to cut in to get it which I figured, but it gives me piece of mind to know it’s gone and not have a random hard lump in there.
.... and no more updates since November 2022. I'm sure by now she can definitely stand to pee without having to clean up the whole bathroom, sit down to work without pain, use her hands perfectly, and penetrate her they/them wife.
DarkWhorse
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jan 2, 2022
Yeah, I'm sure your wife really appreciates you cleaning the bathroom more. Only downside is you pissing all over it first.
- Joined
- Mar 16, 2022
I get being dysphoric/dysmorphic. The same way I'm not a psychopath, but can imagine the motivations of a serial killer, theory of mind, blah blah blah.
But what. In the hell. Is going on. With these insane women and their need to stand to pee??
"Having a vagina doesn't bother me. And yet I need phalloplasty. I'm so dysphoric, but I like to jam dildos into my very female vagina. You know, the organ equipped for penetration by a penis and the passage of menstruation and birthing infants. Doesn't bother me. But I need a dick. I'm so disturbed by sitting to pee that I'd rather piss all over my legs in the shower. Heck, I'd rather piss through a dribbling fistula hole in my fake balls."
Also noticed that she mentions being too fat to use a stand-to-pee device. So she's driven by her raging desperate dysphoria to undergo a disgusting procedure and attach a fake malfunctioning pee sprinkler that reeks like a rotting port-a-potty, springs leaks and sloshes piss around inside, but won't...just go on a diet. Lol. Lmao
But what. In the hell. Is going on. With these insane women and their need to stand to pee??
"Having a vagina doesn't bother me. And yet I need phalloplasty. I'm so dysphoric, but I like to jam dildos into my very female vagina. You know, the organ equipped for penetration by a penis and the passage of menstruation and birthing infants. Doesn't bother me. But I need a dick. I'm so disturbed by sitting to pee that I'd rather piss all over my legs in the shower. Heck, I'd rather piss through a dribbling fistula hole in my fake balls."
Also noticed that she mentions being too fat to use a stand-to-pee device. So she's driven by her raging desperate dysphoria to undergo a disgusting procedure and attach a fake malfunctioning pee sprinkler that reeks like a rotting port-a-potty, springs leaks and sloshes piss around inside, but won't...just go on a diet. Lol. Lmao
- Joined
- Sep 15, 2016
“ jacking myself off with a dick was a motion I should have been doing the entire time. It felt right and made it feel all the better.”
Goddamn man, these broads always write about masturbation in the most batshit insane (and feminine!) way.
Goddamn man, these broads always write about masturbation in the most batshit insane (and feminine!) way.
Mariposa2.0 LTE
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 16, 2022
The Chanel of stink ditches.