Masturbation lessons and 100 genders: What our children are being taught at school
Why are pre-pubescent pupils learning about ârough sexâ and preferred pronouns in secret?
By Louisa Clarence-Smith,
EDUCATION EDITOR
4 March 2023 âą 8:00am
What is going on in relationships and sex education lessons in schools? This week, MPs have raised the alarm about the volume of messages they are receiving from concerned parents who say they donât know where else to turn.
Conservative MP Miriam Cates has presented Prime Minister Rishi Sunak with a dossier of evidence on the ânature and extent of indoctrinationâ in Relationships and Sex Education (RSE) in UK classrooms. It includes an abundance of case studies of sex education materials devised for teachers which state that gender is âfluidâ as a fact, or include teaching that many parents consider age inappropriate. In some schools, children as young as 12 have been asked in lessons what they âfeelâ about oral and anal sex.
âMy 13-year-old was taught that there are 100 genders,â says one mother at an independent school in the East Midlands. âAt that age my children have been taught âaccepted terminologyâ such as âcis genderâ, ânon-binaryâ and âgender fluidâ with no suggestion that many people would find these terms and this ideology contrary to their beliefs â religious or otherwise.â
Another mother of a child at a London state school says her child was taught about masturbation in their last year of primary school by teachers she barely knew. She became concerned after teachers told parents that during RSE lessons: âWhat happens in the room, stays in the room.â She said: âI have a teaching background and I said, âThatâs what paedophiles sayâ. Then there was this whole discussion. They had cards on the table, discussing whatever was on the card, and one of them [said] masturbation. Lots of parents were saying: âYou might frighten my child talking about this because they are 10.â Who wants their child sitting with another personâs son or daughter discussing this?â
Mrs Cates is among MPs calling for an âurgent inquiryâ into sex education in schools. âFor the last year-and-a-half Iâve been working on this and itâs becoming more and more clear how inappropriate [these] materials are,â Mrs Cates told The Telegraph.
The New Social Covenant Unit, a think tank Mrs Cates co-founded in 2022, is preparing to publish the study presented to Mr Sunak which states that the ânationâs children are being put at riskâ by teachers with âa radical ideological position on sex, gender and sexualityâ who are âmonopolising the RSE sector in the UKâ.
The proliferation of contentious and sexually explicit teaching content can be traced back to 2019, when the Department for Education published new statutory guidance on RSE.
Damian Hinds, then education secretary, wrote in the foreword to the guidance that the Departmentâs âguiding principles have been that all of the compulsory subject content must be age appropriate and developmentally appropriateâ.
However, the boundaries it set were more vague than the Governmentâs earlier guidance, dating back to 2000, which had stated that âthe promotion of sexual orientation or sexual activityâ would be âinappropriate teachingâ.
The new guidance also specified that âgender identityâ should be taught in âan age-appropriate and inclusive wayâ.
Mark Lehain, a former head teacher and DfE special adviser, says the new document was a âmasterclass in consensus buildingâ, but it gave schools a minimum requirement of what to teach without giving teachers a âceilingâ. Schools also found there were limited teaching resources available.
This has created an opening for âactivist groupsââ to fill the gap. Organisations including Stonewall, the LGBTQ+ charity, began working with hundreds of schools on how to âmap out an LGBT-inclusive approach to [RSE].â The New Social Covenant Unit report highlights other RSE resource providers, including the School of Sexuality Education, which is understood to have worked with more than 300 schools and states it has a âsex-positive approach both in the classroom and in generalâ.
The charityâs workshop facilitators include Dr Emma Chan, who, on a personal blog, has published a video of herself singing a song called Letâs All Masturbate, followed by a link to an article that advises readers how to do so.
Nadia Deen, a workshop facilitator for the School of Sexuality Education, uses the charity to advertise her own sex-education website, which includes articles on âanal fun and frolicsâ and âthe problem with heteronormativityâ.
A book used by teachers in schools that the charity promotes on its website, Great Relationships and Sex Education, advises teachers to âemphasise that love and affection are often important parts of good sex, but not always. For others, good sex is quick, rough and anonymous. You can also explore the fact that some people enjoy feeling pain during sex, which is often referred to as kink or BDSM.â
When a chief executive of a multi-academy trust was presented with such evidence, she defended the organisation and said that she had agreed not to share the lesson plan with parents, the think tank found.
A spokesperson for the School of Sexuality Education said: âWe find the politicisation of relationships and sex education very concerning and will continue to provide high-quality, inclusive, age-appropriate RSE in line with the government guidance and young peopleâs rights.â
The agendas of external groups appear to have influenced teaching materials prepared by teachers and local authorities. An RSE education programme drawn up for schools by Swindon Borough Council last year includes a demonstration of dams, or flavoured latex, to prevent the spread of STIs during oral sex, and promotes masturbation as a way of âexpressing themselves sexuallyâ.
Case studies to be used as discussion points for Year 11 pupils (children aged between 15 and 16) include a situation where a boy wants to take his relationship to âthe next levelâ by creating a video of him and his partner having sex.
Other popular RSE resource providers include Pop ânâ Olly, a company which provides LGBT+ educational resources to primary schools. Its book, What does LGBT+ mean?, which is designed for nine-year-olds and older, explores âidentity, assigned sex, gender, love, sexuality, discrimination, privilege, allyship, pride and moreâ.
Nick Fletcher, the Conservative MP for the Don Valley, warned the Prime Minister in the House of Commons that schools are spending money on materials by organisations that âare educating our boys and girls that they may not have been born in the right body or have an inner gender identityâ.
He is contacted every week by concerned parents who are âat a loss with it,â he told The Telegraph. âI just really donât think that primary school children and secondary school children should be exposed to this kind of ideology at that tender age.â
âSchools are stuck between activists and the guidanceâ, says Mr Lehain. âOfsted made it quite clear that if you werenât covering the minimum, then that would have an impact on the schoolâs [Ofsted report]. But no school has been hammered for going too far, because there is no ceiling.â
Mrs Cates says that schools have âbeen put in an extremely difficult positionâ. She points out that the DfE guidance on political impartiality, published last year, said that schools had to balance their legal duty not to politically indoctrinate children with the Equality Act.
âThe equality duty requires schools to be activists in the classroom and that does not fit with anti-indoctrination law,â she says. âMost headteachers probably donât understand the law, which makes it very difficult for them to make a decision. Thatâs why it has to come from the Government.â
Meanwhile parents have faced battles to view teaching materials because third-party providers have told schools they canât be distributed for copyright reasons. One mother with children at a London primary school said that when she challenged the school over RSE lessons and asked to see the resources, they said no. âThey had signed an agreement with the provider saying that they were not to share the resources with anyone other than the person teaching,â she says.
The Department for Education has been saying since last summer that it would write to schools reminding them that they should âmake it clear that if a parent requests to see teaching materials, copyright law does not prevent a school from sharing [it] with parents in person on the school premises.â The letter has yet to be sent.
James Esse, co-founder of Thoughtful Therapists, a group of counsellors, clinical psychologists and psychotherapists who have banded together over their concern over what is being taught to children, says: âI have parents reaching out to me all the time with concerns about materials that children are being taught in schools.â He says that at an independent girls school in London, after-school âgender allianceâ clubs are run by transgender sixth-form students for very young pupils. âI think we need to end indoctrination in schools because thatâs exactly whatâs happening,â he says. âThere needs to be clear guidance on schools not pushing contentious ideology as fact, and guidance in terms of children transitioning in schools.
âGender dysphoria [the feeling that there is a mismatch between your biological sex and your gender] is a mental health condition. I canât think of another instance where a child presents with a mental health condition and it is kept from parents.â
Molly Kingsley, of parentsâ campaign group UsForThem, said the group is becoming âincreasingly concerned about the hijacking of childrenâs sex education by extreme trans and gender ideologies.â âChild safeguarding trumps political correctnessâ, she adds.
Families from some faith groups have had particular concerns about whether materials are age-appropriate. However, government insiders say it is often âliberal parentsâ who write to say they donât think nine-year-olds need to be taught that there are dozens of different gender identities and encouraged to go on Pride marches.
A DfE spokesperson said: âWe will write to all schools this term to emphasise the rights of parents to see teaching materials being taught to their children. Schools must make sure all content they use is factual and age-appropriate, and engage with parents so they are aware of what their children are being taught.â
Mrs Cates, who is waiting to hear back from the Prime Minister, says she hopes the new evidence âwill be a wake-up call for the Governmentâ.
âThe idea of children aged 11 and 12 being taught how to masturbate â itâs just horrendous,â she says. âAnd to talk about sexual desires with adults you donât know is potentially a safeguarding risk.
âThe Government has a basic duty to keep children safe in schools,â she adds. âI hope that the report will encourage even more parents to shed a light on what their children are being taught.â
