Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[VenomPlug]

I think i've had enough. It was fun and shitpost, done now. A-logs were right since day one.

Hit the stroke Jack, and please fucking die
So slow, so slow, so slow, so slow

 

[AnOminous]

I can't wait for Jack to die.

 

[Generic Retard]

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Jack is about to be back and you just know what he means by 'real work'. Also that bitmoji is holy shit.

"Now comes the real work."

No Jack that's not how it works.
Your brain had it's best chance to start re-arranging right after the injury. But now?
I hope you didn't just lie around and watch TV, because now the neural plasticity is probably worse than ever.

Is there a word for Christians like Jack?
Like the sort of people who decline medicine, but would rather pray for an easy fix?

This is just Lobster Claw 2.0 - Neural Stroke-aloo.
He is done. This will never heal, if he didn't already start making progress.

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

"Now comes the real work."

No Jack that's not how it works.
Your brain had it's best chance to start re-arranging right after the injury. But now?
I hope you didn't just lie around and watch TV, because now the neural plasticity is probably worse than ever.

Is there a word for Christians like Jack?
Like the sort of people who decline medicine, but would rather pray for an easy fix?

This is just Lobster Claw 2.0 - Neural Stroke-aloo.
He is done. This will never heal, if he didn't already start making progress.

It's pretty common in the bible belt

 

[Nothing To Say Here]

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That poor dog......

While I feel for the innocent animal, I’m also concerned for the people that are now housing the drooling mushbrain, mommywife, and the dog. Is someone assisting them with a roof over their head or are they destroying the staged McMansion now that jack is only capable of shitting himself.

 

[I am Jack's dead arm]

Jack's going home to ... what? Can't wait for the crybaby arc when he's Karening out about the nice Nigerian lady who wipes his ass.

 

[Archie_Kimkicker]

But I ask again...where the fuck is home now (surely they are not imposing on the juniors)?

As for the Jackhouse, still sitting on the market, no new open houses listed.

 

[Super Hans v2]

While I feel for the innocent animal, I’m also concerned for the people that are now housing the drooling mushbrain, mommywife, and the dog. Is someone assisting them with a roof over their head or are they destroying the staged McMansion now that jack is only capable of shitting himself.

Where else would they be, other than home? TamHam's family lives a ways away. Jr and Tammy Jr live in a second floor apartment where they're already in the shit for hiding dogs. The 'friends' they bring on Jack on the Go look like they want to cut his throat when all they have to deal with is a meal.

Having Jack and HOPE at home while TamHam slaves away at work is going to do wonders for the home sale. Imagine how much shit will have to be cleaned up every day between the dog and triplegic.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

The funniest part about his films with political agenda sperging is that he's been regularly watching South Park and Christian films recently without noticing the obvious irony

He's too mushbrained to pick up on what they're actually saying. It's like Chris who thinks "Family Guy" is a show made by conservatives wtihout understanding they're making fun of small town conservatives.

Sorbo still does movies? Last I saw he was getting reamed by Lucy Lawless on twitter and crying like a baby.

Jack's kinda screwed theres a critical time after a brain injury where most healing occurs.

He does mainly religious type movies now which is a shame because while he's a huge douchebag in real life he's a decent actor. But he blames his lack of Hollywood appeal with the fact he's a conservative.

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That poor dog......

Still has that fucking harness on. Poor thing. And now she has to deal with Jagoff every day.

But this says something. Hope doesn't care that he's back. Just goes to show even animals don't like this sentient mound of lard.

 

[Frog Man]

one of the cooks laughingly told me he peed in the thin crust dough he just made, all I did was tell my family and friends not to eat there that weekend.

This is fucked. Like that manager who pissed in the Arby's shake mix last year.

 

[I am Jack's dead arm]

He's too mushbrained to pick up on what they're actually saying. It's like Chris who thinks "Family Guy" is a show made by conservatives wtihout understanding they're making fun of small town conservatives.


He does mainly religious type movies now which is a shame because while he's a huge douchebag in real life he's a decent actor. But he blames his lack of Hollywood appeal with the fact he's a conservative.


Still has that fucking harness on. Poor thing. And now she has to deal with Jagoff every day.

But this says something. Hope doesn't care that he's back. Just goes to show even animals don't like this sentient mound of lard.

I'm not a big dog guy, but Hope's stance is just showing how depressed she is. Sad.

 

[jackopalkia]

This whole scenario has made me dislike Jack more than I have ever before.

Others stated that pretty much that he has fucked up his treatment and probably ruined all chances of getting a bit better.

I doubt Tammy will deal with this for very long especially if he acts like a man child so she produces YouTube videos.

Maybe she will get blacked?

 

[Pig Cups]

If that happens, it's time for Tammy to finish him with a pillow party. Remember, Tam-Tam, just kneel on his throat. Nobody will question it. Just keep that pillow right on his windpipe.

It might be upsetting, but it will only be a few minutes. Just keep that knee down on that windpipe for three or so minutes, and it will all be over soon.

Some more handy-dandy DV tips for Tammy:

>A rolled-up newspaper used like a club doesn’t leave the tell-tale marks that normal beatings do.

>If you get the desire to punch Jack, grab a phone book first and place it over the area you wish to punch. Then start whaling on the book. Again, it’ll keep visible evidence of abuse (like punch-induced welts and bruises) from forming.

I am waiting with genuine anticipation for his next CwJ vid; it's going to be so fucking terrible. I wonder, since he's almost a quadriplegic, will Tammy be promoted to Cooking with Jack Sous Chef or will she remain Drool Wiper in Chief?

He mentioned that he can stand, but can’t walk. Obviously, stroke arm prevents him from using a walker. I imagine standing requires a great deal of time and straining just to hoist himself up. And when he’s finally up, it’s mere seconds before he comes crashing down.

At this point, the best he could manage as far as CWJ is him standing behind the counter (or leaning into it) for the intro. He has pre-prepped (by Tammy) raw ingredients in little bowls so that he can combine them while seated, and stirs one-handed. He’ll surely demand Tammy’s help for any cooking steps more complicated than that.

Realistically, it’ll probably be him seated the whole time, giving strokemouthed narrations and interjections. After the camera comes on in close for the tight shot, we find that it’s Hammy doing all of the cooking.

 

[toilet_rainbow]

View attachment 4978926

Jack is about to be back and you just know what he means by 'real work'. Also that bitmoji is holy shit.

View attachment 4979205

That poor dog......

My reaction to these two posts back to back was exactly like this meme



Talk about whiplash. Poor poor Hope. I'm so so sorry, baby. You deserve much better than the Scalfanis.

 

[Cherry Dude]

My reaction to these two posts back to back was exactly like this meme

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Talk about whiplash. Poor poor Hope. I'm so so sorry, baby. You deserve much better than the Scalfanis.

I loathe fat people with dogs. It's always the same story. "Oh, a dog will make us exercise more and be more active! Tee hee!"

Then, every single time, the fat pieces of shit just end up making the dog obese like they are, and give the dog a shortened lifespan with a bunch of medical issues.

Fatties owning dogs should be classified as animal abuse. Get a fish instead, Jack. It'll sit there, be useless, and be just as smart as you are!

 

[PaulPelosi'sBoyfriend]

Yet Jack is still against national healthcare because it's "socialism". Just like Jesus would say

National Healthcare is the va system.

 

[Rod Dangerous]

Jack, previously a defender of the earned blue checkmark on Twitter, now wants his paid-for checkmark.

 

[stets]

Whining about twitter on Facebook is such a boomer thing to do.

 

[Mechanical Pencil]

Get a fish instead, Jack.

Naw, keeping fish is too much work for Jack. Even before the mobility loss I struggle to imagine him doing water tests, water changes, substrate cleaning, tank scrubbing, and whatever else goes into responsible aquarium keeping.

I am genuinely shocked HOPE isn't already sausage shaped. I'm sure with time and Jack spilling food that will change.

 

[p1138]

I loathe fat people with dogs. It's always the same story. "Oh, a dog will make us exercise more and be more active! Tee hee!"

Then, every single time, the fat pieces of shit just end up making the dog obese like they are, and give the dog a shortened lifespan with a bunch of medical issues.

Fatties owning dogs should be classified as animal abuse. Get a fish instead, Jack. It'll sit there, be useless, and be just as smart as you are!

Fatty keeping fish wouldn't last a month. Aquariums require work, it isn't the most difficult stuff ever but it's regular work to keep it clean and keeping the fish alive. If he can't do his own PT, can't follow basic cooking instructions, etc. do you really think he's going to adopt any sort of routine for taking care of fish? Not to mention he could barely do anything anyway since he's gimped himself so badly. The lazy fuck doesn't need pets, period. He's practically nothing more than a pet for Tammy at this point himself.

I am genuinely shocked HOPE isn't already sausage shaped. I'm sure with time and Jack spilling food that will change.

That would require not starving the dog. The wendigo isn't going to let Hope consume all of the meat and cheese that fatty could be eating instead.