I personally don't think that's really that bad. I do think dating fans is weird but it doesn't look like he was doing it maliciously or with the intent to exploit someone. It does seem exactly what a stunted young guy who is unwilling to put himself out there would do if they had that resource. I'm not his biggest fan or whatever so I don't think he's perfect, especially now, he just reminds me of a couple guys I know who are going through the same type of thing. Where a BPD narcissist woman uses their self-esteem, lack of support and lack of real world experience to control and hurt them so it makes me feel a bit sorry for him. He's still responsible for his actions however, regardless of who he's married to, so I don't think he's undeserving of the criticism he gets.