Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

[Maude Snew]

Unemployed socialists, "reformed" GNAA script kiddies larping as woke hackers, Nigerian leeching scammers, unemployed ex-Microsoft call center techs also larping as hackers, Pat is certainly gathering a coterie of skilled, high-value individuals into the Patorian guard. The few, the brave, the unemployed, the Patorian Guard.

They're assembling a crew for a big heist. Their mission: steal the Colonel's other secret recipe. They are known as Rick's Chins and they are legion.

 

[Ivan Daniloff]

Someone please draw Pat in the Paddywagon ‘Pattywagon’.

Pigrig

 

[siegemeister675]

They're assembling a crew for a big heist. Their mission: steal the Colonel's other secret recipe. They are known as Rick's Chins and they are legion.

Disagree, they're trying to steal the pepperoni recipe from Papa John, I wonder what Pat would want that for

 

[I Just Can't Do It :(]

Another day, another recruit for the Patorian Guard.

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I wish we could get a "Patorian Guard" sticker for threads of ppl like Jackie and Shame, similar to the "orbiter, horrorcow" thing.
Of course all this before Null's worst nightmare becomes a reality and he is forced at gunpoint by UN peacekeepers to open the vaunted Pat board.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

I hate to defend Piggy but the neurotic women and white knights sperging about this are being idiotic, this was obviously meant as (a ham-fisted) comment in support of her feeling.

Nothing says “I support women” like making jokes about their fear of violent attack.

 

[siegemeister675]

I wish we could get a "Patorian Guard" sticker for threads of ppl like Jackie and Shame, similar to the "orbiter, horrorcow" thing.
Of course all this before Null's worst nightmare becomes a reality and he is forced at gunpoint by UN peacekeepers to open the vaunted Pat board.

God a Patboard would be such a dream, I don't understand how he can't argue there's not enough content here, there's literally a Pat board over at ONA and it's the whole fucking website.

Nothing says “I support women” like making jokes about their fear of violent attack.

I agree Piggy is a hypocrite but the problem is that he's a feminist in the first place not that he's not a good enough feminist.

 

[James done did it]

I wish we could get a "Patorian Guard" sticker for threads of ppl like Jackie and Shame, similar to the "orbiter, horrorcow" thing.
Of course all this before Null's worst nightmare becomes a reality and he is forced at gunpoint by UN peacekeepers to open the vaunted Pat board.

The only event that would merit a pat board is ironically the event that would stop him from tweeting, ie him being outed as the swatter all along and being put in actual prison, not just "I am a fat retard who doesn't pay his debts and does not show up to debtors examinations" jail.

It wouldn't stop people from sending him printed off tweets of impostor children running around trying to get lucky with fat girls and old cat ladies with his profile picture though.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

I agree Piggy is a hypocrite but the problem is that he's a feminist in the first place not that he's not a good enough feminist.

Feminism is a disease, I agree. Simultaneously, women do have legitimate reasons to be creeped out by strange men with no boundaries in secluded places. Pat’s just so self-centered he can’t think beyond his egotistical need to pretend he’s a comedian.

 

[Meat Target]

God a Patboard would be such a dream, I don't understand how he can't argue there's not enough content here, there's literally a Pat board over at ONA and it's the whole fucking website.

It'd be too much trouble. The Pests like to cowtip, which would leave Null to clean up the mess.

Leave them to do Da Bits on their site. This is the internet's cheap seats.

 

[Broadside]

Another day, another recruit for the Patorian Guard.

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Another pathetic nobody giving meaning to his life by adopting safe "current thing" politics. It's amazing how pronouns instantly signal "I'm a fucking gullible retard and narcissist" in equal measure.
Also- add felony associating with mug owners to the charge list!

 

[Law]

Nothing says “I support women” like making jokes about their fear of violent attack.

It's a classic Nice Guy TM maneuver to say something misogynistic/fucked up, then backpedal with a hasty "I WUZ JUSS JOKIN' REEE" when everyone gives you the side-eye.
I think keeping Pat to one thread with lots of spin-off threads for all his lolcalves is better than a Patboard. He might go dark after he's forced to pay Quasi and nothing's sadder than a nice new board that quickly goes empty.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

It's a classic Nice Guy TM maneuver to say something misogynistic/fucked up, then backpedal with a hasty "I WUZ JUSS JOKIN' REEE" when everyone gives you the side-eye.

Yeah but it’s also part of being so self-centered that it wouldn’t even occur to him that, say, a grieving parent might not be in the mood for an incest sex joke about their terminally ill child. Pat and his performative tweeting come first.

 

[Broadside]

Yeah but it’s also part of being so self-centered that it wouldn’t even occur to him that, say, a grieving parent might not be in the mood for an incest sex joke about their terminally ill child. Pat and his performative tweeting come first.

We've long ago established that Pat is absolutely on the spectrum. Inappropriate jokes and comments are par for the course!

 

[Law]

Pat and his performative tweeting come first.

True. His tweeting also comes before his personal safety, his future, his finances, his reputation, and possibly his marriage. Fatrick is truly a black hole. It's why the theory that he's behind the SWATtings is so plausible to me.

 

[Star Platinum]

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Patrick S. Tomlinson on Twitter: "@JESilverstein @stealthygeekii @mcj…

archived 21 Apr 2023 12:59:45 UTC

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i almost choked on my coffee

 

[Broadside]

They're all gonna laugh at you!

 

[John Andrews Stan]

We've long ago established that Pat is absolutely on the spectrum. Inappropriate jokes and comments are par for the course!

Speaking of being on the spectrum…

Pat is a completely self-absorbed megalomaniac. Any autism is very far down the list of his pathologies.

 

[I'mThePatMan!]

I've been really busy in my free time and have just re-started a mothballed project on the SFWA

Not gonna lie Cave, ever since you hinted at your new project a while ago, I've been anxiously awaiting for it. I just know it's gonna be a banger.

Then that’s settled. UHHHHH……wow. All I can say is, fawking strap in. You know, at some point I have to actually get some work done. Between Fatrick’s meltdowns, Jackie the Fed wanting to use my art as an NFT and Shane Nokes manically fighting with individual users on his thread……I might lose my job at this rate. It’s too much content and I can’t turn my head away.

Yeah the only good thing about this is that it actually forced me to get a ton of shit done in just a few hours yesterday. I’m calling off dead when Pat gets arrested.

Pat's life is a slow burner type of shitshow: not as bombastic as other lolcows, but the longer you stay for the ride, the more mesmerizing its insane twists and turns become. In 2023 alone I got scolded twice for being behind work because laughing at his fat fuck took way too much of my time. Yet, if we ever get some footage of the day Pat gets arrested, I'm 100% getting shitfaced no matter what.

Heck, I might just take a whole week off so I can do it at Hoolis! And If any Brothermen or Kiwis do the same, drinks are on me. I'll be the guy wearing stupid jeans and sandals, a backwards Brewers cap and a shirt with Norm's laughing face and #THEIDIOTSWON on it.

 

[rusty shackleford 1]

He’s just so arrogant and overfamiliar. The one where he asked the woman with a dying child how she managed to stay married to a man without a blue checkmark after he made the awful sex joke is the perfect intro to patposting for normies.

The Anika interactions are the same, she dropped subtle hints that he was being fuckin weird and he charged ahead inviting himself to spend time with her. Dying child, fear of sexual assault, limited time with family, doesn’t matter- tell pat he’s hilarious and quit talking about your silly problems!

 

[John Andrews Stan]

Heck, I might just take a whole week off so I can do it at Hoolis!

Save some vacation time for the mass relocation to Milwaukee during his trial. Better yet, start transitioning to self-employment now.