Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

[Anonymus Fluhre]

I just don't get what was going on there. It was his birthday, and that was a gift, right? I see little containers of what I assume is model paint. Does that mean he painted a fucking dinosaur model while a bunch of people watched? I'd be hoping for a stroke as well if I had to be a part of that.

Yes, given that it's a resin model too I wonder if he washed and cleaned it before he painted it. Or did he think it's just like any other plastic kit? He's working with a fine detail brush in that photo so that's why he looks hyper focused. He's still an amateur though as you can tell that there's no blending at all going on.

 

[Laquisha Guntermensch]

She looks hopeful a sudden brain hemorrhage is imminent.

She can't believe she stood up Trayvon's nog blast gang for this.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

I thought they banned him and locked down the forums to get away from prying eyes.

They did, as soon as Quasi found out what was going on and jumped online. But for about 20 minutes or so, Torswats answered questions from OnA posters. (Though most of them told him to kill himself.)

 

[Swiss46]

Some real mom watching her mentally retarded son energy in that model picture. I wonder if she gave him a gold star for doing a good job.

 

[AirdropShitposts]

2) Credit: HoneyBadger - full meltdown lmao
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"If you cared about your dog, you wouldn't have spent years criminally harassing my family. But you did, so you don't. They'll be better off with a new family while you rot in prison. Enjoy."

Holy shit, Rick!

I also like how neither of his "Fun facts, stalker." are factually correct.

 

[Dean Pentel]

Beware staring into the abyss of the toy dinosaur's creation for too long, as sometimes the dinosaur pesters Niki from the backseat of her car, and sometimes the fat mong building it childs you and sends you to prison for making fun of him.
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I'm telling you guys, Patrick is an untapped gold mine for helping people with severe self esteem or depression issues. Fuck, even those people from that Hoarders show.

Charge those types of peoples' insurance companies a fuck ton of money for them to spend one day with Patrick (supervised by a psychiatrist, of course). They'll come to see that as fucked up as they are, they're not even close to terminally awful and unproductive as they could be.

Can you imagine his social media antics when he's feeling that gassed up about being a positive role model for people? The milk we'd get from him, the secondhand stories we could collect plus all the money one's LLC would be raking in...it's almost a no-lose scenario. Just liaise with Nikki for scheduling everything and have some Jewish accountant work up a deal that sounds good but gives them a very small cut of the gross.

 

[John_Smith]

Bored Tard Wrangler watches her charge play with a dinosaur toy while awaiting the arrival of the short bus to take him home.

Nikki has an unusual grip on that bottle. Most people grip the bottle lower down. Maybe she is pretending that it is something else.

If he had not washed the resin properly, that paint would not be adhering as well as it is. So he's not a complete dunce. However, he is handling the model with his bare hands, and getting his finger oils all over it. This is an amateur mistake. A knowledgeable painter will have the model on some sort of temporary stand so that he does not need to touch the model. Also, better lighting, a paint mat to avoid getting paint on the table, probably a wet palette.

Further sperging: Looks like he is using Vallejo acrylics. Next to the can in the foreground are two bottles with black lids. These are Vallejo Air acrylic paints. These are airbrush paints-- evidence that he has an airbrush. The white lid is for Vallejo Model color paint, the gray lid for Vallejo Game color. The bottle under his hand is Vallejo Game color. In the container in the foreground one sees a mix of Vallejo Air and Vallejo Game. In his hand, It may be an Army Painter Masterclass brush, which is Kolinsky Sable ( the best bristle material for non-metallic paints). Army Painter brushes though, meh.

I doubt he drilled out holes underside the feet for pegs to make mounting the model on a plinth/base easier and more stable. If so, they would serve well on a temporary stand instead of a crumpled cardboard box. Really though, it's the dirty fingers all over the model while painting it that really shows what a fumbledick he is.

 

[TurboNAS]

Why does he think it is spelled SWATTing?

It stands for Special Weapons And Tactics and Torswats.

Pat has been giving away the game this whole time!

 

[TurboNAS]

Is this idea crazy ... or crazy like a fox?

In the Lindsay Ellis thread someone took it upon themselves to read her sci-fi novel, and review it, chapter by chapter. We could do the same for whichever is the best selling of the Pat novels.

I am not volunteering.

There’s a little thread with some comments on his books here. A few posts in I quoted Shiny’s excellent review of Starship Repo. Well worth reading their commentary.

 

[Broadside]

Just sayin'

 

[Paulmall Blartcop]

I appreciate the autism in your post,

but:

These are airbrush paints-- evidence that he has an airbrush.

Not really. A lot of people use airbrush paints with brushes, it's not unheard of. Or maybe he bought it by accident because he's a fat retard

 

[Broadside]

Pat a few hours ago: STOP CONVERSING WITH ME, FELON.

Pat now:
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Patrick please stop writing nonsense online and pay your debts

 

[Sneedfully and Peacefully]

almost all the good bits lately haven't been posted here like Pat admitting the debtor exam over text.

It's true, stalker child. I haven't. I would like to see Pat finally capitulate to reality. I hate to ask to be spoonfed but if there's a cap please indulge me.

 

[Meat Target]

With OnA now (rightfully) closed, I have made this account for the purpose of x-posting stuff posted there to here for archival; will do this for the long term as you fanooks have been lackin' (outside of moonface), almost all the good bits lately haven't been posted here like Pat admitting the debtor exam over text. Just want to see all the funnies put into the permanent record.

Thanks for keeping us posted, Brotherman.

 

[Jeff_the_Thriller]

I'm going to start answering those extended warranty phones calls like Fat.

"I'm not interested in an extended warranty for my truck, child. How many times must I tell you, child? Every time you call me it is felony telephone harassment. Enjoy prison, stalker."

 

[Ralphamaniac]

Hey, I'm in withdrawal over here!

I figured they'd notice sooner or later.

Name is meat target
Can't figure out the captcha

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

I'm going to start answering those extended warranty phones calls like Fat.

"I'm not interested in an extended warranty for my truck, child. How many times must I tell you, child? Every time you call me it is felony telephone harassment. Enjoy prison, stalker."

You will never be able to imitate his belligerent stupidity, his faggy voice, and most importantly, his copious rolls of fat.

 

[RussianParasite]

Anyone read Lewis Space Trilogy? I hear it's good.

Finished it last year. It’s incredible. The concepts in it are far beyond anything our fat friend here could grasp. It’s a hard trilogy to describe in a way that does it justice— one of those things that you just have to experience for yourself. CS Lewis was truly a man ahead of his time.

Regarding the deck: I really do not get how Pat manages to one up himself nearly every time he does a project in terms of stupidity. I’m awful at these sorts of things and even I can see how glaringly, obviously wrong what he is doing is. Pat needs to get a job if for nothing else to pay other people to do this shit for him.

 

[rusty shackleford 1]

lol honeybadger pisses pat off so bad He must have absolutely snapped thinkin about those beefers. Noooo child you’re losing your dog AND them titties FOREVER, child. I bet he sucked his thumb to self soothe after that one.

 

[Associate Rick]

I'm going to start answering those extended warranty phones calls like Fat.

"I'm not interested in an extended warranty for my truck, child. How many times must I tell you, child? Every time you call me it is felony telephone harassment. Enjoy prison, stalker."

Or you can tell them you want to speak with their manager and throw in this for good measure.

edit: Listening back over some clips from Josiah 5 and I love the escalation of Ricks "shut your fucking mouth".