🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[ddlloo]

Ralph taking lessons from Boogie on how to straight face tell the most bullshit health lies imaginable. Tapered down to 1mg a day give me a break lmao.

 

[LiquidChrisRespecter]

This "tapering" fantasy is as much about enticing the paypigs back as it is about Meigh.

Guntchat is in a state of civil war thesedays because half of them enable him because it's funny (like Dick does) and the other half have a parasocial relationship with him so they actually give a shit and tell him to clean up his act.

He already scared off Bam, one of his most dedicated paypigs because somebody impersonated him and Ralph simply can't engage his brain before opening his mouth.

I think Avon Chartsdale (one of the jannies?) also fucked off.

If Ralph actually reduces any of his alcohol or benzo usage it'll be because he can't afford to maintain his habits at the usual rate anymore.

 

[Sneed Chuckson]

Most people in South Africa speak English.

I think it's high time for the South African Rehab arc.

"Live like a king and get clean".

Gotta ring to it, hear that Ralph?

Watching Ralph's stream abruptly cut off because he forgot about load shedding would be funny as fuck.

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

Watching Ralph's stream abruptly cut off because he forgot about load shedding would be funny as fuck.

that could happen in South Africa or California, tbh

 

[Telemeter]

Ralph taking lessons from Boogie on how to straight face tell the most bullshit health lies imaginable. Tapered down to 1mg a day give me a break lmao.

Nah, Boogie is a masterful lier compared to Ralph.

Ralph is more like DSP, his lies are obvious, predictable, and absurd.

 

[Sneed Chuckson]

I always liked this pic. You can see Jesus has some sick tats hidden up his sleeve.

For me, it's the nunchakus on the door handle. The skull is strong but the nunchakus are a subtle gem.

 

[Ivan Daniloff]

I always liked this pic. You can see Jesus has some sick tats hidden up his sleeve. But Ralph would never share his drugs. Plus he's the RALPHAMALE! He don't need NOBODY! Even Jesus! He would totally try to burn the unburnable bridge of salvation, just out of spite and pride.

Spoiler: Junkie Jesus sperg

It’s a camp classic. I imagine many of the details have some evangelical symbolic significance but even without that gloss it’s intriguing and funny.

• The junkie is handsome and muscular, with a pronounced bulge in his jeans. Interesting choices.
• Fun custom-distressed wallpaper
• Puzzling elements
  • Handprint
  • Skull
  • Nunchaku
  • Playing cards and ID
    • Does ID belong to the same person who left the handprint?
    • Is he using all three cards to line up heroin? Why?
• OdorEater candle
• Askew lampshade
• Random gun, overflowing ashtray, lighter, and whiskey on CALVARY-carved coffee table to really reinforce the sense that this is where the magic happens
• And of course: Is Jesus’ expression anguish or ecstasy?

 

[Preacher ✝]

I firmly believe that through Christ anything can be accomplished.

The question here is whether or not Ralph can manage to humble himself to our Lord and Savior, and I mean genuine, heartfelt, humility.

If, and its a big if, Ralph can manage such a feat, then he might just have a chance at turning his life around.

Personally I doubt Ralph can truly humble himself in such a way. The odds certainly are not in his favor.

 

[FuckMeGentlyWithAChainsaw]

Spoiler: Junkie Jesus sperg

It’s a camp classic. I imagine many of the details have some evangelical symbolic significance but even without that gloss it’s intriguing and funny.

• The junkie is handsome and muscular, with a pronounced bulge in his jeans. Interesting choices.
• Fun custom-distressed wallpaper
• Puzzling elements
  • Handprint
  • Skull
  • Nunchaku
  • Playing cards and ID
    • Does ID belong to the same person who left the handprint?
    • Is he using all three cards to line up heroin? Why?
• OdorEater candle
• Askew lampshade
• Random gun, overflowing ashtray, lighter, and whiskey on CALVARY-carved coffee table to really reinforce the sense that this is where the magic happens
• And of course: Is Jesus’ expression anguish or ecstasy?

The objects on the table symbolize a sinful lifestyle: drinking, smoking, doing drugs, being violent. Playing cards stand for gambling, the gun likely symbolizes violent crime in general. They surround the ID, which symbolizes the man himself, surrounded by and defined by vices.
Behind him is (I think) a map of North and South America. So the room he's in is 'this world' which he is currently taking himself out of by his actions.
He is left to choose between death(eternal punishment) on the right or life(salvation) behind the white door. The handprint implies he tried that door, but due to his sinful nature(stained soul) he was unable to pass through, requiring Jesuses selfsacrafice to wash him clean first.
I have no idea why there are nunchuks on the door.

 

[PaladinBoo]

I firmly believe that through Christ anything can be accomplished.

The question here is whether or not Ralph can manage to humble himself to our Lord and Savior, and I mean genuine, heartfelt, humility.

If, and its a big if, Ralph can manage such a feat, then he might just have a chance at turning his life around.

Personally I doubt Ralph can truly humble himself in such a way. The odds certainly are not in his favor.

A part of humility is understanding what is holding you back. The answer is of course self-centeredness. It is self-centeredness that causes you to sin and to indulge in vices. You are only caring about yourself and your base desires instead of the people who care about you or God the heavenly father. I say this as someone who isn't a Christian but has tremendous respect for the faith. While I would love nothing more for Ralph to find God and with the help of faith clean himself up and be a better man and father to his children, I also understand that the chances of that happening is very slim. Ralph is one of the most self-centered and selfish people I know. Right now he is talking about finding God and seeking help because he thinks that is what Meigh wants to hear and that will get him back in her good graces. The man has no love for God, Jesus, or anybody but himself. It is what makes Ralph a truly pitiful creature.

 

[Mr E. Grifter]

A part of humility is understanding what is holding you back. The answer is of course self-centeredness. It is self-centeredness that causes you to sin and to indulge in vices. You are only caring about yourself and your base desires instead of the people who care about you or God the heavenly father. I say this as someone who isn't a Christian but has tremendous respect for the faith. While I would love nothing more for Ralph to find God and with the help of faith clean himself up and be a better man and father to his children, I also understand that the chances of that happening is very slim. Ralph is one of the most self-centered and selfish people I know. Right now he is talking about finding God and seeking help because he thinks that is what Meigh wants to hear and that will get him back in her good graces. The man has no love for God, Jesus, or anybody but himself. It is what makes Ralph a truly pitiful creature.

I feel bad for Ralph at times, but I also want him to get his just desserts, and to learn his lesson. The fact he never does these makes him hard to have any sympathy for.

It also makes me think that regardless of how genuine he might be in the moment, his goal is to get back to where he was. He doesn't want to change, at least not yet.

If he could become a better person, I think it would unironically be quite inspirational - but I don't think he's capable of it on a base level.

 

[Preacher ✝]

Right now he is talking about finding God and seeking help because he thinks that is what Meigh wants to hear and that will get him back in her good graces. The man has no love for God, Jesus, or anybody but himself. It is what makes Ralph a truly pitiful creature.

It also makes me think that regardless of how genuine he might be in the moment, his goal is to get back to where he was. He doesn't want to change, at least not yet.

What's truly pitiable is that even if he is blessed with a miracle and gets clean I imagine he will stumble at the finishing line and fail to realize all the credit and glory belong to God, and none belongs to him.

Instead I reckon he'll become self-righteous and smug about it, which taints anything inspirational.

He'll be like one of those prosperity ministers, thoroughly taking the Lord's name in vain for their own self aggrandizement and personal profit.

 

[Malaika]

I think Ralph is panicking because the prospect of going to Mexico and being in that house by himself would mean he's completely and totally lost. I'm sure that's why we're seeing a "humbled" , "Apologizing" and "Sobering" Ralph. I won't theorize on whether or not he's faking it or is for real. But whichever it is, I'm certain he's doing it cause he's hoping that he can persuade May to give him another chance before Monday. I do think it's possible they might reconcile because, as people often point out, May is one of the dumbest women on the planet and she doesn't give a lick about Rozy's safety. This works in Ralphs favor, however, There's two problems :

1. It's obvious May does not want to live in Mexico. And now that she's being coddled by her American family and enjoying the comforts of a first world country again I think that moving back to the states will be an unnegotiable term for her. Ralph cannot do this because the moment he becomes a resident of the US again his debtors will be on his ass and it'll be easy again for Vickers or anyone else that has a legal bone to pick with ralph to serve him with papers.

2. Ralph has a ton of hate in him, and it's engrained deep. No matter how remorseful he may feel right now, I don't see Ralph ever truly forgive May for humiliating him like this and making him feel this much fear and pain. I think once the "situation has passed" and May is in his clutches again, within weeks Ralph's anger at this whole event will bubble to the surface and the abuse will be worse than ever coupled with his Paranoia that she might leave again.

Monday will be interesting. I'm genuinely curious if Ralph will go back to Mexico tomorrow, I'd be almost willing to bet money he'll burn whatever money he has left or cry to people in his circle to let him couch-surf. I genuinely do not see how Ralph will go back to Mexico without May as I'm 100% sure he'll self-destruct if he does and he probably knows this too. Put on top the fact that he _has_ to stream or his money runs out. Going to Mexico without May there means he'll destroy himself in record speed. Lingering in the states, clinging to Xander and being in reach of May means he'll have no money. He is completely boxed in.

 

[SargonF00t]

Monday will be interesting. I'm genuinely curious if Ralph will go back to Mexico tomorrow, I'd be almost willing to bet money he'll burn whatever money he has left or cry to people in his circle to let him couch-surf. I genuinely do not see how Ralph will go back to Mexico with May as I'm 100% sure he'll self-destruct if he does and he probably knows this too. Put on top the fact that he _has_ to stream or his money runs out. Going to Mexico without May there means he'll destroy himself in record speed. Lingering in the states, clinging to Xander and being in reach of May means he'll have no money. He is completely boxed in.

Ralph has his streaming gear in Mexico, does he not?

He also has two poor cats that may not survive and presumably a heap of other shit in his house.

 

[Polyboros2]

Bargaining Stage Ralph. He's full of shit, there is a way to prove his 1mg of Xanax cut back BS and that's dying on the floor of his cheap hotel. If he's cut back at all they're no way it's that severe. He's trying to say what he thinks May wants to hear to come back and continue serving him.

The charade won't last the week, Ralph will move on to a new cope when he doesn't get any response from May. We're probably at this point cause his suicide baiting didn't get a response. If her mom's smart May doesn't have a phone or computer, Ralph is probably putting on this show hoping it gets to her somehow. We'll get the turn to rage and threats soon.

 

[deeman]

Probably because Pantsu wanted to fuck these other women too and so she was pissed off that she had told Ralph she was happy to do threesomes with him, but he often didn't bother, just wanted to get with another woman by himself.

Imagine the poor horses and ladies having to climb up and then down the Gunt whenever they changes position?

LMAO do they even have AA meetings in Mexico? Not in English if so.

'Hola! Mi habla San Miguel, cuando estoy lleno de cerveza, doma al cerdo más salvaje.

 

[Anonanon]

Probably because Pantsu wanted to fuck these other women too and so she was pissed off that she had told Ralph she was happy to do threesomes with him, but he often didn't bother, just wanted to get with another woman by himself.

Yeah I got that vibe after she confirmed she wanted Alice to herself and declared her "not a real lesbian"

May is a really twisted Dyke. Whatever corner of the internet she got into during her adolescent years has permanently changed her for the worst. Frankly I think she was hoping and was disappointed when Ralph couldn't pull anymore ugly ewhores. She transformed him from the RALPHAmale to the RALPHAbeta as vengeance.

 

[Terfatron]

The one song playing in my head while reading his latest tweets

edit- word

 

[Mr E. Grifter]

Yeah I got that vibe after she confirmed she wanted Alice to herself and declared her "not a real lesbian"

May is a really twisted Dyke. Whatever corner of the internet she got into during her adolescent years has permanently changed her for the worst. Frankly I think she was hoping and was disappointed when Ralph couldn't pull anymore ugly ewhores. She transformed him from the RALPHAmale to the RALPHAbeta as vengeance.

I think trying to pry into May's mind from the perspective of a normal human-being is pretty pointless, it's akin to trying to put yourself in the mind of a bearded dragon or a iguana. Sure, there are some base instincts we can draw an analogy to - fear, sex, stress - but beyond this it is totally alien. So take anything I say with the grain of salt that I have no clue what would possess May to act as she did, because anyone who looks at a fat, slobberly alcoholic midget, witnesses him attacking a woman pregnant with his child and thinks to herself "Yeah, that's a real man right there... I want whatever he's got." has a number of very important screws loose.

Anyway, with the appropriate caveats right out up front - I think that initially this was part of May's plan. She wanted the Faith thruple, she also wanted the Alice one. She helped Ralph in both these endeavours and covered for him in terms of his alleged domestic violence and sexual violence. In a sense, she was acting like a pimp's bottom bitch, she was the one who was favoured by Ralph, or that is how she viewed it, and she would help him attract more women to the harem while also keeping them inline. Whether this was her aim, I have no clue but the behaviours do dovetail quite nicely on this.

The change in all of this, as far as I see it, came with Rozy. Now, this is not to say May has been a good parent, she has exposed Rozy to far too much already, and even thinking of flying her to Mexico because of her retarded babydaddy's hair brained scheme to avoid the consequences of his actions is testament to that... However, I do think May is dedicated to looking after the baby. Despite being a broke brain lizard person, I think that the maternal instincts changed her priorities. That ultimately, without Rozy her and Ralph would still be together and probably trying to create a harem of others to live with them for Ralph to orally rape. She seems to have deprioritised trying to get Alice into bed with her, probably her aim over the last few months was to try and keep her failing family together. Part of that maternal instinct probably was screaming that you need the father around to help care and pay for the child. Rozy was the priority, clearly, with Ralph as a close second who she hopelessly believed she could fix (despite picking him when he was cheating on and physically attacking his pregnant gf of the time).

The final straw was the fact that Ralph does nothing to care for his baby girl, spends his entire time out of his mind, and yet he is able to sober up and spend thousands to go and see his son for a couple of hours so he can gloat online. It more than likely trigger a switch buried deep in her lizard brain's pre-frontal cortex and made her realise that if she stays her and Rozy are absolutely fucked, and that this fat retard has nothing to offer either of them. I hope the best for Rozy, and that we never see her online again, but May should hang her long horse face in shame for putting that child in harms way for so long. Still, better late than never I guess.

 

[zyclonPD]

View attachment 5098942

wow imagine being such a little BITCH that you actually run back the shyster lawyer to make amends because a balding Mexican told you too. Ralph has hit a new low. Didn't know his Master kept him on a leash like that. Maybe Masterson will make him grovel before Milo next for forgiveness.

what a cuck.