Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Marisa]

i don't think the impossible burgers and shit are a conspiracy any further than just finding a way to charge idiots more money. i could be wrong obviously, but i'm not gonna act like a retard just because a package of fake meat i'm not going to buy is sitting next to a box of preshaped hamburger patties i'm also not going to buy.

 

[EatBeforeYouEat]

Dr Jack, Keto Scientist is on the case.
View attachment 5109958
Jack gets mad in the comments when people use longer words than him, but he knows he's right because he's seen the videos.

The shit he posts on facebook really throws me the fuck off. Sometimes I even wonder if this dude is a masterful troll but I have been here long enough to realize that this is just another example of his obscene hypocrisy. For someone to post this on facebook you would think that the author is cave-dwelling paleo nutbag. Instead, here is a guy who just 1 week ago went out on his scooty puff and devoured a whole calzone (no way he shared that), probably 4-6 slices of pizza and tiramisu.

Keep it up, Jack. We live for these moments

 

[AnOminous]

box of preshaped hamburger patties

That's one of those "how the fuck are you literally this lazy" things to me.

 

[ZipDisk]

A BBQ at a second location. You throw the preforms in the cooler, light the state park charcoal grill, and throw the preforms on.

But at home? Fuck that, shape your burgers.

additional bug berger sperger:
If you want the point they brought up, a pound of meat is $7.28, a pound of soy is like $0.26.

Charge $10 for both, and which brings in more profit?

 

[SandyCat]

Stop making me self conscious about buying preshaped meat circles

If you don’t know Jack was drinking an astronomical number of Bang energy drinks a day. Something like nine.

They must of been for the wendigo. There's no other explanation as to how a human can drink that much energy drink and still be alive

 

[curbside2]

Stop making me self conscious about buying preshaped meat circles

They must of been for the wendigo. There's no other explanation as to how a human can drink that much energy drink and still be alive

He’s admitted to repeatedly falling off the wagon. My theory is it’s the insane amount of caffeine that’s giving him strokes more than anything else.

 

[ZipDisk]

Bang! Bang! Heart get fried.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

This is obviously propaganda, but it's the video that made me wary.

It's all a way for people to sell more soy or whatever they're made from. There's some good intention behind these things but in the end it's just more corporate greed.

You want to go veggie? Go veggie. Nobody really cares if you do. But don't say that you're eating a plant based fake burger because you're saving the planet. You're not. It's still over processed food with stuff in it that you can't identify. I have a pretty simple way for you to eat properly. Don't eat anything with ingredients you can't pronounce or you don't immediately recognize.

And if you want something vegetarian that's tasty and qualifies as fast food, have a falafel wrap. That shit is delicious.

I remember fuckwits trying to sue over that, to the point it was written on the wrapper. "No, we're not going to deep clean the grill for you defects"

Fuckwits are going to sue over the smallest things. If you're a vegetarian then don't eat at a fast food burger place. It's just fucking retarded because of cross contamination.

A giant portobello mushroom cap in soy and ginger and lightly salted and otherwise treated like a burger is superior to any fake beef bullshit.

Especially when grilled and then placed lovingly over a grilled beef patty with bacon and blue cheese.

Bang! Bang! Heart get fried.

Don't understand a word of what Herr Lindemann is saying but I really dig their music.

 

[AnOminous]

Charge $10 for both, and which brings in more profit?

Eat the bugs, bigot!

Especially when grilled and then placed lovingly over a grilled beef patty with bacon and blue cheese.

Yeah that too. I have done the "actual beef patty plus portobello plus swiss plus bacon" thing.

It still even alone makes a vastly superior substitute for a beef patty while not even pretending to be. Vegans who eat food that stands on its own merit rather than being some sick corporate chemical bullshit pretending to be meat are doing better than idiots who boast about their veganism while desperately seeking for sad substitutes for the meat they really want.

 

[MS Paint Gigachad]

A giant portobello mushroom cap in soy and ginger and lightly salted and otherwise treated like a burger is superior to any fake beef bullshit.

Also, seconding the other poster that said if you want good vegetarian food, look at what Indians do with their food. People in that region have had many centuries of having their food tradition divorced from meat. I'd turn to them first for good vegetarian foods before I look at the goyslop turned out by Beyond Meat.

Not to powerlevel too hard, but I used to work in fast food. One of those places you'd get a wrap or something and add toppings like chicken, beef etc.

We didnt have a ton of vegetarian options, but whenever an indian ordered veggie options, they'd go for our sauteed mixed veggies - a mix of onions, bell peppers, mushrooms and stuff like that - as opposed to tofu or whatever. White people would be 5-10x more likely to get the tofu or whatever. Maybe the indians werent used to eating tofu, but it says something about their culture, I guess.

 

[ZipDisk]

Tofu is shit, why take marsh flesh when you can have perfectly fine veggies? (I am not a pajeet and resent that they stole beef tallow from the US fast food market)

 

[DeadwastePrime]

Tofu is shit, why take marsh flesh when you can have perfectly fine veggies?

i'll have you know miso soup with the tofu bits is a tasty soup

 

[Tiresome]

Tofu is shit, why take marsh flesh when you can have perfectly fine veggies? (I am not a pajeet and resent that they stole beef tallow from the US fast food market)

It would have happened at any rate, veg oil is cheaper, just like replacing sugar in soda with corn syrup. It's all about the bottom line, the Hindu thing was a convenient excuse.

 

[Marisa]

Tofu is shit, why take marsh flesh when you can have perfectly fine veggies?

tofu is good when it's prepared right! i usually marinate mine overnight and eat it with rice and veggies the next day, it's pretty satisfying and keeps me full all day

 

[Doctor of Autism]

That's one of those "how the fuck are you literally this lazy" things to me.

Honestly I can see it being used if you just want to make a quick burger or making burgers in bulk for other people like at a BBQ or for some sort of event.

 

[desudesu]

Qali just posted the following on Insta. Reminder that this guy thinks that rejecting a HVAC job that was given to him via his grandfather, and opting for a 7-Eleven convenience store manager is part of "the grind". Also he's constantly hanging out around high school kids, rather than having normal similarly-aged friends doing adult things:

 

[ZipDisk]

He looks like a feminine troll doll.

 

[Archie_Kimkicker]

Jack Jr, as always, is a homosexual pedophile.

 

[PlasticOwls]

Tofu is shit, why take marsh flesh when you can have perfectly fine veggies? (I am not a pajeet and resent that they stole beef tallow from the US fast food market)

Tofu is a vessel for whatever you're accompanying it with, and it has 3 different texture varieties, not counting the numerous other preparations of the soybean.

If you think tofu is shit, that's a skill issue.

 

[Octopi]

I normally think the genre of "I tricked a meat eater into enjoying vegan food!" videos is utter brainrot, but Jack might be literally the only person on Earth who I would like to see get duped like that, a la that guy who got tricked with vegan sausages.

Jaack's taste buds must be so fucking blasted by now he wouldn't be able to taste anything anyway, but he'd still loudly bullshit about all the ways he could Just Tell it was GUD MEAT.