The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch / @TenaciousRanch / Steampunk Penny / Penellope Logue / Phillip Matthew Logue - Don't cry because it ended, laugh because it's still getting worse.

[AirdropShitposts]

He might be able to sell it to one of the immediate neighbors for close to nothing. Maybe a token penny a square foot or something. He should seriously consider it just to spite the Tranch since it's not like he's going to be able to actually sell it on the market.

 

[Questionable Ceviche]

Paul is a retard. He will not beak even, I doubt he will even be able to sell it at any price.
1, The land is completely destroyed, all topsoil is lost and it just looks like a moonscape.
2, The buildings are basically condemned for human habitation at this point. (Minus the parts of the building they used as firewood.)
3, Land is cheap out in the middle of nowhere. After you turn it to a martian desert the value of the land basically becomes zero.
4, The land has several serious and very expensive biohazards that any new owner till take on liability on. (massgraves of hundreds of medium sized farm animals)

The worth of the land is negative. Possibly significantly negative. He will never sell it. His only option is to default on the loan so the bank will repossess it and take over liability for 4.

The alpaca graves could be a big problem for the next owner as soon as they dig 6" down and find them. They're already in violation of state regulation just on lot size alone - there's no way they could have buried them far enough away from the house or well in order to meet the distance requirements.

Can't quote my original post but the rules are pretty simple:

Here's a handy PDF from the state regarding animal carcass disposal: https://ag.colorado.gov/sites/ag/files/documents/Animal-Carcass-Disposal-CDPHE.pdf

They are allowed to bury carcasses on their property, but there's some caveats:

• Layers of lime or quicklime should be applied below and above the carcass to help accelerate decomposition of the waste. Care should be used in applying lime as it is caustic and can cause severe burns to the skin and eyes.
• Burial pits must be covered with a minimum of two feet of soil.
• Carcasses cannot be placed in any body of water, seasonal creek or pond, or in areas that may carry or hold water such as gullies, ditches, blowouts or natural depressions.
• To minimize potential impacts to groundwater, large numbers of bigger carcasses (e.g., more than ten cows) should not be limed and buried together.
• Surface water must be diverted from the burial site through the use of berms or other structures.
• All carcasses must be buried at least 150 feet away from any water supply source.
• All carcasses must be buried downgradient from any groundwater supply sources.
• The bottom of the burial pit must be at least five feet above the high point of the uppermost groundwater table to ensure that carcasses do not come into contact with groundwater.
• Burial sites must be located at least one mile away from any residence of any person.
• Burial sites should not be located in areas with fractured or cavernous rock, high seasonal water tables or highly permeable soils.

Between the animal burials and god knows what else they dumped on the property, the new owner could be in for a nasty surprise and associated cleanup costs.

 

[The Hoh Rainforest]

He might be able to sell it to one of the immediate neighbors for close to nothing. Maybe a token penny a square foot or something. He should seriously consider it just to spite the Tranch since it's not like he's going to be able to actually sell it on the market.

Paul, his mother, and Sky are the only people on the loan. Penny and the others had no official financial stake in the Tranch, they could walk at any time and leave Paul and Sky with the mess. Which is what they did.

 

[AnOminous]

He might be able to sell it to one of the immediate neighbors for close to nothing. Maybe a token penny a square foot or something. He should seriously consider it just to spite the Tranch since it's not like he's going to be able to actually sell it on the market.

Who would buy it? The obligation to clean up the environmental disaster would run with the land, so you'd be buying a huge liability. And if he failed to disclose the absolute atrocities these troons did to the land, the alpaca mass graves, etc., they could just reverse the sale and sue him for fraud.

Even giving it away for free, you'd have to be a fool to take it, at least before the state or Superfund or whatever cleaned it up.

Between the animal burials and god knows what else they dumped on the property, the new owner could be in for a nasty surprise and associated cleanup costs.

Anyone who isn't a fool would demand insurance before touching this toxic troon-destroyed property. And any competent contaminated land insurance underwriter would take one look at this vile shithole and refuse after laughing maniacally.

 

[Oxyjen]

Whilst I agree with the sentiment, I think people might be over-estimating the degree to which the authorities in the US have the power or inclination to go chasing minor environmental infractions on a ranch in the middle of Buttfuck, Nowhere.

This is a “buyer beware” type deal. But people will buy any sort of wrecked shithole property if the price is right.

It still has amazing views. There’s still a house that can be lived in with a few $$$$ of biohazard cleaning. Someone will buy it and just leave the land alone, in 20 years time it will have some vegetation again.

 

[AnOminous]

with a few $$$$ of biohazard cleaning.

Lmao no. More like $$$$$ or even $$$$$$.

 

[Cuckoman]

It still has amazing views. There’s still a house that can be lived in with a few $$$$ of biohazard cleaning. Someone will buy it and just leave the land alone, in 20 years time it will have some vegetation again.

This was very marginal land out in the middle of nowhere on a mountain. There are literally millions and millions of acres of open land like this and it is very very cheap land since you can not use it for farming. The only value it has would be the house as a remote vacation home for someone, but the troons destroyed it :-(

The land is so marginal that is probably took thousands of years for the topsoil they had to develop, and the troons destroyed it by having hundreds of farm animals there. It will not recover by itself in anyones lifetime.

Cleanup costs is probably higher than what they bought the place for in the first place but now both the land and the house are basically both destroyed. Even if they clean up the biohazards the house and the land will still be worthless.

 

[NoReturn]

This was very marginal land out in the middle of nowhere on a mountain. There are literally millions and millions of acres of open land like this and it is very very cheap land since you can not use it for farming. The only value it has would be the house as a remote vacation home for someone, but the troons destroyed it :-(

The land is so marginal that is probably took thousands of years for the topsoil they had to develop, and the troons destroyed it by having hundreds of farm animals there. It will not recover by itself in anyones lifetime.

Cleanup costs is probably higher than what they bought the place for in the first place but now both the land and the house are basically both destroyed. Even if they clean up the biohazards the house and the land will still be worthless.

Thousands of years from now, some archeologist will uncover the alpacagrave and be terribly terribly confused. They might think the tranch was a mass sacrifice of some kind.

 

[Jump]

He might be able to sell it to one of the immediate neighbors for close to nothing. Maybe a token penny a square foot or something. He should seriously consider it just to spite the Tranch since it's not like he's going to be able to actually sell it on the market.

If he got a 30 year mortgage then he still owes way more then its worth now. He is upside down in this now. He would actually have to pay money to "sell" it.
I forget what they paid for it but just an example:
>200K owed still.
>Can only get 50k for it now
>Fat Paul has to bring 150K to closing to be able to close out his mortgage and transfer the title to the new owners.

They are fucked no matter what. Really the only option is to secure the property and then hand it back to the bank and get the credit fallout overwith.

 

[stupid frog]

Who would buy it?

Another retard tranny, maybe.

 

[AnOminous]

They are fucked no matter what. Really the only option is to secure the property and then hand it back to the bank and get the credit fallout overwith.

I wonder if they can sue Boner for the deficiency if they take it over, or for the troon vermin infestation deliberately destroying the property. If it's found to be deliberate it might not even be dischargeable in bankruptcy.

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

I wonder if they can sue Boner for the deficiency if they take it over, or for the troon vermin infestation deliberately destroying the property. If it's found to be deliberate it might not even be dischargeable in bankruptcy.

I don't think so. Phil knew who he was bringing aboard.

 

[anliteralidiot]

Could they designate it for a controlled house burning, to help firefighters?

 

[The Skeksis Emperor]

So what happens when Penny's "parents" die. Which will be soon.

Penny gets a free house for real. He's banking on it, probably.

 

[AnOminous]

Penny gets a free house for real. He's banking on it, probably.

Being a troon, he'll just destroy that, too, probably in less than a year. Assuming he hasn't already before even inheriting it.

 

[Flamin Park]

Could they designate it for a controlled house burning, to help firefighters?

No it's full of hoards of garbage and broken appliances. No firefighter without enormous life insurance would go near it

The land would actually be perfect for any rich amateur astrologer to set up an observatory with the humid climate and low light pollution, but they'd have to burn down the house and clear all the junk scattered everywhere

Failing that it's not a bad location for a meth lab, although meth cooks would just squat it

 

[Jump]

The bank's cheapest option I think would be to just bring in a excavator,payloader and some 40 yard dumpsters and just knock down the house with junk and all and load it in to dumpsters. Level the place out and cut their losses. With lot cleaned out it would then have postive value and might be worth something to the abutting property owners. If I lived next door I would buy it just to eliminate the risk of getting another set of fuckheads moving in.

 

[AnOminous]

The bank's cheapest option I think would be to just bring in a excavator,payloader and some 40 yard dumpsters and just knock down the house with junk and all and load it in to dumpsters. Level the place out and cut their losses. With lot cleaned out it would then have postive value and might be worth something to the abutting property owners. If I lived next door I would buy it just to eliminate the risk of getting another set of fuckheads moving in.

They might have to clean up the alpaca mass graves to get a permit to do anything with the property. A next door neighbor buying it for pennies to do just that would make sense, though. It's not useful property but it might make an okay no man's land between you and anyone else.

 

[Terfatron]

How long have their website been set to private? Was it before Bonnie's picture dump on twitter?

 

[Cuckoman]

The bank's cheapest option I think would be to just bring in a excavator,payloader and some 40 yard dumpsters and just knock down the house with junk and all and load it in to dumpsters. Level the place out and cut their losses. With lot cleaned out it would then have postive value and might be worth something to the abutting property owners. If I lived next door I would buy it just to eliminate the risk of getting another set of fuckheads moving in.

The land is worthless. Nothing can grow there any more, there is no topsoil. It is like buying land in the middle of sahara.

The banks cheapest option, if they understand the situation and state of the property would just eat the mortage as a loss. Phone the tranny and tell him it is his lucky day and the bank has forgiven his mortage. There is no more mortage and there is nothing he has to pay.
Just to avoid having to take on the property and its liabilities.

I seriously think this would be the cheapest solution for the bank.

And then I would call the IRS and tell them that they should keep an eye on trannys next tax return and that he declares this capital gain properly. Just because.