Today I discovered that I'll be a dad. How do I prevent my future child from becoming a lolcow?
Congratulations! Parenting and growing kids is amazing.
In case you were semi-seriously asking the question:
As for having sane kids - 1. Get your own shit together. Personally, mentally, financially, organizationally. 2. Be thoughtful about how you parent. And be consistent - unless you're fucking up, which to some degree is inevitable, btw, in which case, don't be blind or stubborn or proud - fix your errors and be flexible. 3. Do you have practical skills? If so, teach them to your kids. If not, develop some and involve your kid when you use them. Knowing some life skills creates a sense of capability and self-sufficiency, which is a big mitigator against lolcowness. 4. Know they will have struggles no matter how great life is, and apply compassion. Build them up, and teach resilience and perseverance. 5. Do stuff with them. I know someone who went with his kid to some father-son (or kid, idk) weekend basketball camp. Thought that was great, on multiple levels. Time with dad, doing a sport they share, seeing dad doing sport stuff with other dads, probably some team/competitive stuff to share, and just generally a special event together - kid feels loved and lots of other dimensions to it.
I'm all set to start my new job in a couple weeks but I'm still wrapping up my current one now that I've given my resignation. I still dread doing it because I don't trust the current team I work with. But I can't just tell them all to fuck off because I still like the other people outside this current team, and don't want to burn those bridges. I should be taking it easy and enjoying this period, but I can't.
One idea to ease the angst - everytime you feel some negative thing (distrust or whatever), repeat to yourself that you're starting an awesome new gig soon, so nothing here really matters. Then smile. Be professional toward them/the wrap-up is all you have to do. It's no longer your problem.
As for me, I'm in severe procrastination/ avoidance mode and I have got to stop fucking around today, get organized, and start moving. I'm on a deadline and there's no reason to push it off until it's a state of emergency and sub-par results. I think I'm afraid it will take much more work than I think (It's an amorphous set of tasks), and that I've already put everything off too long. So, putting it off longer makes perfect sense, right?
It's also a situation that has a complex emotional component, which is probably definitely the root cause for delay and mental over-engineering.
