"Jim" / James Augustine née James Patrick O'Shaughnessy / Mister Metokur / Jim81Jim / Internet Aristocrat - His autistic videos and the gay beta "sweetie squad" who mindlessly suck his cock.

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Jim is saying he had a heart attackView attachment 5245627View attachment 5245628View attachment 5245632View attachment 5245636
E: small update. Jimmothy has a few listed health issues on his healthcare app
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Edit again (sorry, for some reason archive.org refuses to archive this shit)
Kidney stone drama and osteoporosis and more stints
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This has been a horrible week, the odds seem to be increasingly against Jim. All we can do is hope and pray for the best for him.
 
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:feels:
 
At first everything went black. Slowly, he became aware of a light pushing against the darkness. James Augustine Metokur cracked his eyelids. After a few seconds he inhaled deeply, his endorphins rising to welcome a rolling wave of cool, unfiltered Camel cigarette smoke, as it filled his lungs.

“Thought we'd lostcha for a moment there, Chief,” said Dr Sayrui. As usual, her enormous breasts were straining against the flimsy satin bodice of her maid outfit. “Betcha glad to be breathing our home planet's nicotine-rich air, and not Ethan Ralph's noxious Mexican shart gas.”

Her abnormally large eyes pinched themselves into a pair of adorable crows feet.

The smell of over-brewed tea heralded the arrival of Joshua Moon – the plucky British boiler stoker.

“Flamin' shepherds pie, he's awake!” he exclaimed, nervously fingering his speaking loicence with one coal dust-coated hand. “We all thought you were brown bread for sure!”

“I hate-ta do this to ya Boss, but the giant fighting robot school where we all live, and where you are the head headmaster and teacher of the year, is about to go up against our arc rival – Mersh High – in the Oceana Prefecture Robodome.” said Dr Sayuri, expositionally. “Up for grabs is the coveted gold sash!”

“Bloody eck, that gold sash would look great on our giant fighting robot school!” said Moon. “Plus it would really stick it to Superintendent Sargon if we won.”

“Tell them to pose our giant fighting robot school, with its legs slightly apart, against a rippling background of pulsing, star-shaped energy waves, while drawing a power sword from a scabbard on its back,” instructed Metokur. “Then get it to leap diagonally, high into the air, against a background of speed lines, while someone wails on an electric guitar, and a Japanese man performs a gruff rendition of our giant fighting robot school fight song.”

“Stripe me, that's brilliant!” said Moon, through the crooked dental ruin of his tea-stained British teeth. “Mersh High will never see it coming.”

Jade fox – the green-furred, cat-like creature, with three tails, who was the headmaster's loyal companion – leapt up from the floor and onto the convalescing body of her master.

“Hey, who let Jade out of her cage?” said Metokur.

He reached across and stroked the alien feline affectionately between her ears.

“It's okay, Daddy Jim's home to kick giant fighting robot school ass and eat potatoes,” he reassured.

“What's a potato?” enquired Dr Sayuri.
 
The potato nigger once admitted to having an "embarrassing" fetish on one of his streams, he said he'd tell everyone someday what it is. Did he ever spill the beans?

:thinking:
 
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