Community Munchausen's by Internet (Malingerers, Munchies, Spoonies, etc) - Feigning Illnesses for Attention

[SaidTheSpider]

I also doubt her claims of hidradenitis suppurativa (HS). I'm no doctor, but I am an insomniac who watches pimple-popping videos. Based on this impeccable set of qualifications, I know that HS often involves truly painful-looking lesions and tracts, and it leaves distinct scars. The armpits are often afflicted. This individual flashes her hairy armpits plenty, but I didn't see any of the unmistakable signs of HS.

I'm actually not so sure. HS is also common in the groin and butt crack, among other areas. It tends to occur in skin folds and as a fatty she's got a lot of them. It also doesn't necessarily progress to those horrifying scars (in case anyone's unfamiliar, HS causes tunneling infections under the skin and can result in doctors needing to essentially flay the affected area (again, commonly your entire crotch) to clean it out) if treated early enough.
My main reason to believe her is that HS is such a gross and unglamorous condition that it's hard to imagine anyone choosing that to fake for clout. Stranger things have happened, but I'd be inclined to guess that she actually does have HS or has had some kind of cyst or bump which she or a doctor suspected to be HS, and it would most likely have been a minor case and resolved with minimal intervention. Then, since she's desperately grubbing for any remotely plausible illnesses to claim, she's also including even the most minor things she can scrounge from her actual medical history, or conditions that were mentioned to her as possibilities, or what she found on WebMD when looking up "weird bump in groin", etc.

 

[Oracular Slug]

Borderline Personality Disorder, POTS, Body Dysmorphia, Hidradenitis Suppurativa, Body-focused repetitive behaviors, IBS, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder with skin picking, Myalgic encephalomyelitis/chronic fatigue syndrome, arthritis, abdominal migraines, gastroparesis, Crohn's Disease, severe depression, chronic pain syndrome, PCOS and Endromitrisis

Psych, munchie trio, psych, huh maybe, psych, angry tummy, psych, munchie trio, fat, angry tummy, angry tummy, angry tummy, psych, fat/psych, excuse why fat, yeah ok but like 10% of uteruses suck like that… so a fat psych case with a dicky tummy, an angry uterus, 2/3 munchie trio, and maybe some gnarly groin stuff. I’m usually nicer than just going “fat crazy chick” but daaaamn if the shoe doesn’t fit!

or what she found on WebMD when looking up "weird bump in groin",

*That wasn’t an STD that she immediately rejected cuz virgin

 

[std::string]

Then, since she's desperately grubbing for any remotely plausible illnesses to claim, she's also including even the most minor things she can scrounge from her actual medical history, or conditions that were mentioned to her as possibilities, or what she found on WebMD when looking up "weird bump in groin", etc.

Candidal intertrigo can look pretty damn similar to HS if you get a secondary skin infection from scratching it, and that would also solve the mystery of why on earth she's taking itraconazole.

So that could be it.

 

[Gengar]

Munchie Rebecca Esther is a non-binary fat munchie e-beggar who states she has Borderline Personality Disorder, POTS, Body Dysmorphia, Hidradenitis Suppurativa, Body-focused repetitive behaviors, IBS, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder with skin picking, Myalgic encephalomyelitis/chronic fatigue syndrome, arthritis, abdominal migraines, gastroparesis, Crohn's Disease, severe depression, chronic pain syndrome, PCOS and Endromitrisis and is mostly bedbound.

Skin-picking OCD  and body-focused repetitive behaviours listed as separate conditions? That's like saying you have bipolar and depression.

BFRB isn't a specific diagnosis - it's an umbrella term for specific disorders like trich or as a symptom/co-morbid, like skin-picking as a compulsive behaviour. The DSM-5 classes BFRB disorders as under OCD or OCD-related, was attempted to be classified in ICD-10, and they're still fighting over how to classify it in ICD-11.

Also - again, it's an umbrella term, and not necessarily a disorder or made as a specific diagnosis. BFRB could also be something like biting your nails. It's so very telling it's something she quickly Googled because if you look up Wikipedia, it'll list everything counted under BFRB, and I can see how some munchie thinks that it's a separate diagnosis.

Sorry for being autistic as fuck and picking (lol) over literally the smallest thing here, but it's such a pet peeve of mine when munchies list something already debilitating, but say it with another name because it sounds unique and speeshul. I'm well-aware that it's possible she's just saying BFRB as a specific symptom of OCD, but literally nobody says BFRB. Just say OCD, goddamit ):

 

[Jimmy Dean Bowl]

It looks like it's another diagnosis and therefore MUST be listed separately.
That's in the Rules of Munching - you must list any and all diagnoses no matter how similar they are, even if they are merely a subset of another condition.

We should create The Munchie's Rules, or The Munchie Commandments, that would be fun.
- Thy must not conceal thine toob from view.

 

[Sparkling Yuzu]

it's such a pet peeve of mine when munchies list something already debilitating, but say it with another name because it sounds unique and speeshul. I'm well-aware that it's possible she's just saying BFRB as a specific symptom of OCD, but literally nobody says BFRB. Just say OCD, goddamit ):

Amanda Baggs did that. She even listed a thing almost everyone has which causes harmless bumps: https://www.healthline.com/health/keratosis-pilaris

 

[lolcow yoghurt]

This is not an online thing, something from real and I'm only here for your opinions. Someone I know claims to have a rare autoimmune disease, visits doctors a lot etc. I was sure that this was definitely true since she is a heavy smoker who is very stressed. I looked up her alleged disease which primarily affects the skin. Her skin looks nothing like what the disease does to one's skin, hers simply looks like what you'd expect from a middle aged heavy smoker. The assumed causes of the disease are listed as some chemicals like epoxy resins and chlorinated solvents, her job doesn't involve such chemicals. So you may think, "what's your point here".

Her friend was previously diagnosed with this disease! And the friend's skin looked like what this disease does to the skin. Her friend kept working with no issue but she left her job a year after the diagnosis. She got "really sick suddenly". It's a rare disease, how come two friends get it years apart? This made me feel really suspicious of her faking it for attention. Medfags, I need your opinions on this.

 

[Jimmy Dean Bowl]

This is not an online thing, something from real and I'm only here for your opinions. Someone I know claims to have a rare autoimmune disease, visits doctors a lot etc. I was sure that this was definitely true since she is a heavy smoker who is very stressed. I looked up her alleged disease which primarily affects the skin. Her skin looks nothing like what the disease does to one's skin, hers simply looks like what you'd expect from a middle aged heavy smoker. The assumed causes of the disease are listed as some chemicals like epoxy resins and chlorinated solvents, her job doesn't involve such chemicals. So you may think, "what's your point here".

Her friend was previously diagnosed with this disease! And the friend's skin looked like what this disease does to the skin. Her friend kept working with no issue but she left her job a year after the diagnosis. She got "really sick suddenly". It's a rare disease, how come two friends get it years apart? This made me feel really suspicious of her faking it for attention. Medfags, I need your opinions on this.

I'm guessing it's scleroderma.
Even without knowing the condition it's suspicious. For two friends to have a rare condition one after the other is skeevy as hell.
Is she claiming any particular symptoms?
How exciting though, your very own pet munchie! Remember not to feed her after midnight.

 

[lolcow yoghurt]

I'm guessing it's scleroderma.
Even without knowing the condition it's suspicious. For two friends to have a rare condition one after the other is skeevy as hell.
Is she claiming any particular symptoms?
How exciting though, your very own pet munchie! Remember not to feed her after midnight.

Scleroderma, yes. I forget its name.
I didn't talk much about the symptoms but as I remember, these sounded exactly like what years of heavy smoking and stress rather than scleroderma. I remembered that her friend who had the disease had weird tight skin. She has a broad history of mental health issues and had used suicide to seek attention from her family. That's what also makes me think that she is faking. She has a few friends and doesn't even go outside other than visiting doctors, retired and moved out of the city. Prior to moving, she had told me that she spent her days in hospital (but not staying ever, just doctor visits).

I just looked up if scleroderma causes weight gain or not, because she gained a lot of weight in past years. A simple Google search says it rather causes weight loss. Could she be faking it? Do I have a pet munchie now?

 

[Kate Farms Shill]

part 3 of Abby and Nicole Sams, identical twin sisters with their horns locked over who is the sickest, specialest one. In part 1, Abby was being active and normal while Nicole was being a whiney tumblr sperg desperate to find an identity or disability she could milk for attention. Nicole got a service dog after getting obsessed with Mary Frey then they both went off to different cities. In part 2, the girls moved back home then into a new apartment together after a year of semi-separation. We learned Abby is also an insane munchie and she got a wheelchair for EDS and POTS and CRPS. Meanwhile Nicole went for the anorexia method and starved herself to a feeding tube. Let the IRL munchie olympics begin.

Spoiler: I'm the cute one!

Everyone in the store got a good laugh at the wheelchair munchie being pushed by the feeding tube munchie with the shopping cart. It was so funny and definitely not just for attention!


Abby is in extreme pain because of the cold weather. She can’t even move without crying. Should have moved to the Virgin Islands like you planned.


Both girls drive all the way to their hometown to go to the neighborhood block party so all their old neighbors can see how sick and special they are. Abby, who needs a wheelchair when she’s in Athens, climbs a tree to read a book.


Instagram keeps eating her attention-seeking posts.


In my totally uneducated opinion this just looks like livedo reticularis. It can be associated with a disease like lupus or vasculitis but a lot of times it's a harmless temperature-induced phenomenon, like Raynaud's but for your legs. She only shows this a few times and every time it's in winter. In summer we see her in shorts all the time and her legs look fine. Also it looks like she fucked with the contrast/saturation to make it more visible. (Anecdotally, there are always a bunch of young, white, bored 20-something year old college girls turning up in vasculitis groups on facebook et al in the winter to show off their cold-induced LR. They claim it's proof they have really real vasculitis but their mean doctor won't diagnose them just because their bloodwork is fine. They mysteriously disappear in the spring.)


Nicole un-tubes herself because of a sinus infection. It hurts too much to have the tube in. Don’t worry, despite being sick and in pain and tubeless she somehow manages to keep getting in a good amount of calories. Tagging chronically.ams, Amy Lee Fisher, who used her feeding tube to purge herself into heart failure and is now dead. Hayden cheers her on.


And the tube is back.


Abby goes to a football game and can’t get into the elevator. She has people carry her wheelchair up the stairs. I mean that sucks for people who need a wheelchair but that's not you. You walk all the time.


She’s trying to build her own SmartDrive out of some robotics kit she's been fucking around with. It’s vastly underpowered.



Now Abby’s got the sinus bug and sneezes so many times she faints.


Meanwhile Nicole has an eating disorder. “My illness, whatever it is, consumes my thoughts. I try to replace it with school work and hobbies but it creeps back.”


She does not experience any hunger when not eating. She feels only pain when eating. It is only through sheer will and determination that she eats pizza quesadillas and granola cookies to keep her weight up. She's in pain and has a migraine from the effort.


Baby’s first tube purge.


Both girls go up to the lake house they spent time in as kids. The girl they’re with is private but she’s also got a service dog. Also Abby's legs are fine again, amazing!


After a fun weekend at the lake, both girls ramp up the dramatics. Nicole vagueposts about her bad doctor's opinion and how Pippi has been very attentive to her emotions.


Abby complains she’s too tired and in too much pain and all she does is cry and play video games.


She has some kind of episode where she feels a stabbing pain in her back followed by total numbness in her left leg which she claims happens fairly regularly. Then she has a migraine and nearly faints because of perfume. None of this could possibly have anything to do with her being a stressed-out student.


On the 17th, Nicole saw a new GI in Atlanta. She was very bad and talked over Nicole and tried to tell he there was nothing wrong.


Nicole can’t get her tube to go back in.


she gets it to go in, but it hurts and she might have to go to the ER for the pain. lol what is an emergency in your world? It's an NG tube and you can eat.


Abby’s boyfriend takes her to the aquarium and she’s so happy she forgets all about her crippling leg pain, weakness, twitches, temporary paralysis, and other symptoms.


But when she goes to the mall a few days later she falls asleep from the fatigue after just an hour.


Nicole is no longer trendy gluten-intolerant. They’re now implying it’s celiac and they need to make a special thanksgiving meal. I'm going to guess these two muppets have not gone full Grace and bought entirely different cookware to make sure Nicole's meals are prepared without cross-contamination


THANK YOU, CREAMY DELICIOUS KATE FARMS. And Zofran, which allows Nicole to eat a full Thanksgiving dinner when she feels like it!


They’re looking at getting another dog. Aww did you really think Abby wasn't going to go for a puppy accessory?


Abby could use a decent chemical exfoliant and some salicylic acid. She is complaining about how her health is affecting her studies.


Her tummy hurts and curling her hair puts her in a pain spiral.


Here’s the story of how the first time she collapsed in California, she was told it was in her head and she was doing it for attention.


She woke up screaming when her sternum popped out.


PRAISE THE LORD! Nicole has been cleared for… an endoscopy. All this time claiming constant vomiting, a feeding tube, and no one’s scoped this girl? Lol. Also esophageal manometry which tests esophageal motility, used to diagnose swallowing disorders, reflux, etc.


Abby is complaining of increasing pain and nausea. I’m sure a donut covered in coconut is just the ticket to feeling better.


She burns herself with boiling water and laughs so hard she vomits. But it’s not a mental illness.


Finals over, the twins go home. Abby is so thrilled with snow that she forgets she’s sick. She frolics like a child and never thinks of her illness. She hasn't done that in a VERY long time except that time at the aquarium, that time she went to the lake, that time she ran through a field. . . this is not the look you think it is my friend.


Pray Nicole gets answers for her stomach woes!


Of course Nicole refers to this routine procedure as “surgery”


doctor sees a healed ulcer and a polyp but nothing that explains Nicole’s claimed level of pain. Also this last pic she includes of a “rash” is broken blood vessels. Can happen to anyone who vomits but it's common in bulimics (and drunks!)


Bad news. Not ready to share. #celiacdisease


Pippi now tasks for Abby too.


They make a Christmas tree out of Creamy Delicious Kate Farms and zofran wrappers. Kate Farms’ insta account LOVES it!!! This would be the kind of shit I was seeing back in February 2018 when I decided to make an account on this weird web forum site I'd been lurking for a few years and called myself a Kate Farms shill. I imagine this company does not like me too terribly much lol.


Nicole’s biopsies are normal. She literally doesn’t know what to do. So things I learned when doxing Grace: if Nicole was actually celiac-level gluten free for as long as she claims she was (I don’t think she has been, but let’s play make-pretend), then negative biopsies would be expected. She would have to have a controlled gluten exposure followed by biopsy to confirm celiac at this point. So if she's trying to claim it's celiac causing her tummy trouble then negative biopsies are the correct answer.


Remember when all her friends were gender weirdos she met online and then she started calling herself a they/them and shaved her head? I’m sure it will shock you to know they are now all spoonies with feeding tubes and service dogs that she met online.


After an uneventful christmas where they both eat and celebrate without complaining, Nicole starts whining about food hurting her and tagging celiac again.


In her year in review post, she claims she was diagnosed over the summer. The first time she mentioned the gluten issue she just said she had a generic “intolerance” like she did to meat which is not celiac, and she’s just told us she never had an endoscopy until recently so she never had like biopsies to confirm the inflammation or anything.


Abby’s 2017 review is far less optimistic. None of the procedures she had worked and she’s struggling.


Her feet are purple and painful.


Nursing school is so hard, guys. Did you think she was actually taking nursing classes? Maybe some math, chemistry, anatomy and physiology? Think again! She’s taking Christian anthropology, psychology, sociology and folklore.


So I went to UGA’s website to see what their nursing program was like and uh, they don’t have one. They have pre-med degrees designed for people who want to be doctors or veterinarians but you have to transfer out if you want a BSN.


They do provide a helpful list of classes they offer that a nursing program is likely to require if you transfer. Funny, I don’t see Christian anthropology or Folklore on the list. I don’t know if she registered late and that was all she could take but wow what a wasted semester.


Meanwhile Abby wants you to know that she is NOT FAKING. That’s why she didn’t stand up out of her wheelchair to get something at Target. Last time that happened people said she was faking, and they always stare at her when she gets out of her car in the handicap spot just because she looks like there’s nothing wrong with her. This really hurts her mental state!!!


Abby is tired when she doesn’t sleep enough, unlike the rest of us who are brimming with energy after a poor night’s sleep.


Her heart rate is through the roof, she subluxed her elbow, fainted, and threw up before school which is totally why she didn’t’ do well in microbio. She’s worried her illness will affect her education.


POTS ATTACK!!!


Another thing I noticed about her proof of her CRPS is there’s always indentations on her left leg, every time. Like she’s just woken up and was sleeping on her left side, or like she was sitting with her legs under her.


Nicole is getting into weird Doterra essential oil shit.


And telling people to stop asking what’s wrong with her but also ask about it because she doesn't mind. Lol pick one.


she still won’t eat because she has full-body intestinal pain. Still shilling Kate Farms.


Abby has the brain fog. She's already not taking as many classes as she should and she's still not able to keep up. Her hands shake and cramp if she writes too long but it's NOT YOUR NORMIE HAND CRAMPS ITS SPECIAL SPOONIE HAND CRAMPS.


Nicole has a sobbing temper tantrum because having an NG in her nose all the time is ouchie and she can't possibly just drink the formula because then she vomits, despite that whether she slowly slips it or pumps it through a tube it ends up in her stomach. some of her teachers are MEAN and won't let her constantly be sick from class. in case you were wondering, no Nicole is not getting the HOPE scholarship, because she complains she won't get a refund if she drops the classes. This is the last time we see the nose hose.


Abby's friends buy her knee braces and she's finally able to go for a jog for the first time since she was diagnosed! Her pain stayed in her manageable zone instead of spiking to 8 or 9!


Nicole is back to muh mentulzing, sleeping all day, and complaining of depression, anxiety, ADD, and OCD. The only thing her tummy likes is apple juice and gluten free vegan burgers. LMAO sure. Now "they" suspect she may have EDS too.


But she gets to see Black Veil Brides!!! Even though the service was VERY bad and they were VERY disrespectful of her as a disabled person. Learn the difference between an illness and a disability, please.


Abby discovers deconditioning and learns that if she exercises she feels better.


Nicole whines that her preferred meal of chips with queso and spoonfuls of peanut butter makes her tummy feel ickies and then she pukes. Pippi totally knows naturally that when Nicole's stomach starts to hurt, her heart rate goes up. Couldn't be that she's in a dining hall, there's food, and she wants some. No, this is an alert! And her heartrate was actually much higher! also her temperature goes up every time this happens.


Abby fails a test but it's totally the teacher's fault.


Nicole is still anorexic and survives on 500 calories while walking two miles a day. That's ~5000 steps so like, half the daily recommended for an adult but at least the dog is getting some exercise. She's afraid to go back to her old doctors because they were so mean and told her nothing was wrong and being called out like that really made her feel bad about herself for a minute.


Abby is literally setting herself up for failure by saying that she might not achieve her dreams of becoming a marine biologist because of her health or grades and that's just the reality of being ill.


Remember just a few posts ago when Nicole insisted that Pippi suddenly stopping meant that she was doing a really real alert? Turns out she just stops dead because she feels like it and this is undesirable behavior Nicole is trying to train out. I see you're shocked and assure you i feel the same.


Just talking about how a year ago she gave away Ziva and now she's happy and loved by her new family, which is great. Good for Ziva. But she illustrates this with a picture of Pippi looking stressed as all hell. It's unusual because Pippi generally looks relaxed and happy in every photo. This is the first time we're really seeing her tensed up and looking uncomfortable with the tail between the legs.


She's seeing a new gastro who will hopefully tell her that her anorexia is a super rare spoonie disease. Pray4me


Success! The next day she cheerfully reports that she was diagnosed with EDS and POTS just like Abby and that's probably why her tummy feels bad too!


Abby is so happy to find out her sister got her special shiny prize, too! And on Rare Disease Day at that! How rare is it to have twin girls who are both special spoonies?!


Abby is also swimming in 60 degree weather. I mean... maybe i'm just a pussy but that sounds like not a great idea to me. But just like when she ran through a field, played in the snow, and went to the aquarium, all her diseases just disappear when she's swimming and she can be herself again. "Freediving with a heart condition is probably one of the most dangerous things I've considered doing." hahah okay your supposed POTS is not exactly a fatal arrhythmia that could kill you at any second.


Meanwhile Nicole has been prescribed "try drinking water?" She's trying to drink, but it's just too darn hard and her tum tum hurts so bad! She hates water and prefers flavored drinks such as juice. So... drink juice? Invest in some mio drops? Some lemon slices? Do that pinteresty infused water thing all the influencers were doing a few years ago? This is not an unsolvable problem. But nah, PORT PLZ!!!!


She accepts her symptoms by obsessively learning about the diseases she wants to get diagnosed with.


Her tummy problems are pretty much just acid reflux and starving herself. Like, take a PPI and move on with your life.


back to spending entire days crying in bed.


And pretending to be sad that her fake celiac limits her diet so much. Also "September and October in the hospital." Acting like she was just inpatient for weeks on end. She went to the ER a few times and was blown off, finally scored a night inpatient for vomiting, and was sent home with the nose hose.


sis, you have peanut butter rice cakes on the ground. First of all, ew. That's the room where you poop, why are you eating in it? And the toilet is like right there next to the food. Why do you want to eat in the bath at all, that sounds horrendous. But also that explains why your dog suddenly came to sit next to the tub. She wants your snack, dude, it's not that deep.


The twins turn 20. Did Nicole eat this cake and if so is it gluten free?


IDK but she did drink a giant sodie even though she just made a post about how soda and carbonated beverages were off the menu for her because of her tender tummy.


Despite their many health woes, the sams girls go camping for a week in South Carolina.


Abby, who needs a wheelchair when she's in Athens, walks on the beach climbs on rocks, falls in a marsh, and does beach cleanup while she's there.


And walks around downtown Savannah, a city full of stairways, weird bridges, cobblestones, and other obstacles that make it not the easiest place to walk around even if you don't have mobility issues.


Her pseudo-deep writing is so triggering. I'm sorry. I read this, you read this now and suffer with me.


Nicole goes back to school and her anxiety comes with her.


Let me break this down for you. You have anxiety > your dog is bored > your dog does something > you believe the dog is trying to signal something > your heartrate increases > because you have anxiety.


Abby goes 40 minutes away to the minute clinic for a sore throat after camping in frigid weather. They tell her to come back in an hour and a half, which is VERY inconvenient, so she goes home because she has to get Nicole from class.


Nicole is overwhelmed and feels discriminated against because of her service dog and disabilities.


Abby is celebrating the one-year anniversary of her CRPS diagnosis after many doctors told her, specifically, it was not CRPS (and then the doctors that diagnosed it later said it wasn't behaving like CRPS and there was nothing else they could do for her.)


Guide/mobility harness for the untested barely trained shelter dog, because of course, having successfully navigated her way through life for 20 years, Nicole suddenly needs guide tasks from her dog. Yanno, she might get anxious and forget which way to walk.


By the way, both girls posted that the day was exhausting and overwhelming and emotional but only Abby reveals that they fucked off to the beach for a day where she climbed on rocks and frolicked in the sand and surf again, and it's "overwhelming and emotional" because they can't just do that every day. She's totally paying for it now, of course. I got it guys, these two just need to be on vacation all the time and then they will be cured!


Nicole is now only consuming apple juice and complaining that malnutrition is making her hips sublux.


Pippi embarrasses her by not understanding her guide tasks she just started learning like a week ago.


Everyone is paying attention to Nicole because she has a service dog so now Abby has one too, and it's also a pit bull. And of course, this dog is also psychic and alerts to POTS naturally.


Nicole goes to her cardiologist for her POTS which is really her eating disorder. She has steps to help get it under control and the first one is to start demanding a feeding tube again. Not a stinky old ouchy NG-tube but a real surgical GJ one like the cool girls have!


She goes to build-a-bear and gets a bunny with a cast on its foot and a crutch, then puts one of her old NG tubes on it at home. Get a personality.


She needs a tube NOW because her "tubestie" is getting one and that's totally not fair!


Meanwhile, Abby starts Maua in public access and gets in fights with normies immediately. The dog is perfect right out of the shelter, just like Pippi, Ziva and Mercy were!


Both girls have nightmares and both dogs alert so they can make them check their heart rates. Pippi climbs in bed with Nicole and Maua "boofs" at Abby from her crate. Shockingly both girls have elevated heart rates after suddenly being woken up from nightmares by their dogs, a true spoonie mystery.


Her friend sends her a package of Kate Farms Komplete coffee flavor, which I once tasted out of curiosity. It is revolting in both flavor and texture (oily AND gritty!) and bears no earthly resemblance to coffee. Have fun, munchie.


Nicole feels like she's been glutened but that simply can't be. She eats rice and a bagel even though she has no appetite. Dr. Abby tells her it's a flare of her mysterious GI illness that isn't celiac. They'll sort it out at the gastro this week.


Oh good, the new service dog is so unsocialized she's never been in a bed before. Great. Wonderful. No red flags to be found.


Nicole's GI appointment goes great. Meanwhile Maua is a stubborn butthole who doesn't want to do anything when she's told. Good, definitely going to make a great service dog with your complete inexperience in training.


Did you guess? Yep, the new GI totally agrees that Nicole needs a G-tube because of dysmotility. Okay but. A g-tube just puts formula in your stomach and then you still have to do all the digestion and passing of the formula, so if dysmotility is the issue and formula in your stomach is the solution, you can also just drink the formula.


"her brace task" REEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. I am really hoping she means that she makes the dog stand and brace itself against the back of her legs and not that she's using it as a crutch. Also another one that needs the dog to press the door buttons that are already made for people in wheelchairs to use, and she's posting this on a pic of her standing with no chair. Maua is much more "gentle" than pippi - you mean she's timid, stop fucking doing this to her.


Having secured the G-tube surgery, Nicole is now creeping on Abby's territory again by using a cane because her nausea makes her feel bad. No really, that's the reason. She's on a new POTS medication so now her heartrate spikes are because her stomach pain


She looks back wistfully on how she could not hack it alone in college and had to move back home to the safety bubble of her family.


If God can take your terrible pain and disability away but simply chooses not to no matter how much you worship him, consider that he's kind of a dick.


Maua is the most well-behaved dog the shop has ever seen. Spoiler: it's because Abby was working her when she was sick and these people are not around dogs very much. The dog had an accident in the body shop then started puking but because Abby's vehicle was the one in the shop and Nicole can't drive, she had to make the sick dog suck it up and stay there for hours. So lethargy from illness + shutting down from stress = real service dog.


And the dog won't leave her side during this stressful final exam cycle. Pitbulls are clingy as fuck to "their person."


Meanwhile Pippi can't work because she's injured. Good. Abby, take note: this is the correct thing to do when your dog is unwell. Nicole is NOT AFRAID to be seen with her cane. She has panic attacks because her emotional support dog is at home. The cane is because her right hip subluxes every day and yes her left hip did sublux because of this but "no worries." These kids. I would like them to experience a real dislocation once in their lives.


Meanwhile, Maua has anxiety. Abby takes her to the cardio and admits she's "antsy" but then swears the reason she stood up and freaked out when the cardiac monitor was beeping was because abby's heart rate was so high and she desperately wanted to alert. OR! She was freaked out by the noise she'd never heard before.


Nicole literally has to try to survive until her surgery. She's literally starving to death. Lich queen would like a word with you. Also Pippi is hurt badly and Nicole doesn't want to let us know what happened but please pray. Vet gives her some meds and it's fine except Nicole is still in a panic.


The twins go to a wedding. Abby swears her dress shrunk and that's why it doesn't fit. Both girls, of course, bring their dogs along for the trip. On the first day Pippi jumps on people and wants to play. Maua's first time at a restaurant is a disaster when Abby forgets she has to pay attention to her anxious, untrained dog and turns around to find she's wandered off to scab chips off kids at a neighboring table which is totally their fault and not hers.


Second day goes better except for the part where we are reminded why pit bulls are not good service dogs even if they are the best-behaved and trained animals on the planet: people are terrified of them. Especially when both of them use head halters that people mistake for muzzles. It's just begging for issues and confrontations with the public.


Thankfully, both of them leave their dogs at the hotel on the actual wedding day but Nicole is now claiming she has nerve damage from something.


Once again, God is exempt from his own concept of morality lmao. Both girls cry about pain more now that they have to get back to the reality of finals.


Kate Farms is NOT LYING about the mercury content of their products!!!!


Remember when Nicole was taking an embarrassingly easy semester of humanities electives and 101s? Despite all her blathering on about studying non-stop and her aesthetic planner pics, she's barely squeaking by because she prioritized faking sick over her school work. This bodes well for her nursing degree! Also I just noticed the little stuffy on her desk - it's Mary Frey's service dog Ollie. Jesus christ.


Nicole has been complaining about how the nausea and pain she's been having are because she knows she's not doing great in school and stressed over finals, but still, she needs a G-tube because she threw up her sandwich and it's totally a flare of a gastrointestinal dysmotility issue she was diagnosed with entirely on self-reported symptoms where she downplayed her anxiety. For all their 'end the stigma' muh mentuls shit these girls are sure not willing to accept that a lot of people vomit from anxiety and it can be really bad, but there's non-tube treatments for it. First I've seen her complaining of nosebleeds. She never even mentioned them when she had the NG tube she was self-inserting nor the 5000 times she posted that she was crying in bed all day.


IF YOU CAN DRINK THIS AND NOT VOMIT THEN A GTUBE WILL NOT FIX YOUR PROBLEM. It will just give you a way to purge without sticking your fingers down your throat.


Her pain from dislocating her shoulder is helped by smelling pleasant scents.


She still misses chicago and felt "safe" there even though her roommates were terrible. Lmao remember when she was there and her dog barked non-stop then the school made her get rid of it? i've had a strong suspicion her roommates were tired of Nicole's dog barking in the crate all day when she left it home to go to class and complained about it. She moved dorms once after getting Ziva but still ended up having to get rid of the dog because the school said it wasn't a real service dog if she wasn't taking it to class.


Ahh abby is another one whose dog is always mysteriously involved in fights but never ever the instigator. Wonderful. also her hammock breaks while she's laying in it but it's fine, just some bruising, nothing dislocated!


But rolling over in bed later totally dislocated her knee which she illustrates by kneeling in her wheelchair. Abby is now complaining of nausea and loss of appetite too.


It's another day to bring awareness to themselves. Nicole posts this pic of herself in a bikini to show off her un-tubed stomach and announce it's gastroparesis. Again, I fail to see how a g-tube is any better than drinking cartons of nutrition shake.


This Kaylee girl Abby is with is her boyfriend's younger sister. She's a competitive waterskiier with no health posts so presumably the brace is related to her sport. The other girl has a prosthetic leg. One of these things is not like the others.


Remember when Nicole told us she learns about diseases by obsessively studying them and then making these study charts? What an interesting little note here. Notice that one of her symptoms is "nose bleeds" which she's just suddenly told us she has.Also lmao why have you not tried a low FODMAP diet before getting approved for a tube?


She's preparing for her surgery by cozying up to yet another member of the spoonie caste, Christina Dougherty/watercolor.me.impressed. She's one of the ones who got her spine hacked by Dr. Henderson and now she has real problems she doesn't get to take back.


And still drinking those giant whipped cream coffee drinks that she can tolerate but she still desperately needs a gastric feeding tube.


hahahahaha omg, it was her ~dream~ to have the bridgeport guide harness because it's a huge munchie status symbol and makes her dog look special and official. She finally has to tap out because they're not made for pit bulls' broad, muscular chests.


Yes, let's take the shelter pit bull that is basically untested around dogs other than the rough-and-tumble fellow pit bull she lives with and stick it with a "lightly aggressive" toy dog she could shake to death in a split second. I wouldn't really trust any dog not to snap at a little shithead that kept getting in his face.


God! stop calling Abby a faker just because she hops on out of her wheelchair when it gets inconvenient to use it!!


Nicole is actually trying the fodmap diet by which she means cutting sugar and sugar alcohols out of her diet because it makes her panic and sometimes vomit. Eating disorder says what? Surgery soon!!


Grits makes her sick, but pizza doesn't, and she wants ice cream but they don't have the flavor she wants in sugar free so she goes without. Kate farms is still safe!! By the way one of the issues I had with the kate farms coffee was it was so fucking sugary. It has like 25g of sugar from agave syrup per carton. Sure it's less than one of those god awful bottled Frap drinks from Starbies but it's far from sugar free.


Abby's retconning. After years of social media presence where she hiked, skated, freedove, paddelboarded, kayaked, ran track, lifted heavy, did yoga, and surfed - even had a bad spill on her surfboard that broke the board - without ever reporting a major injury she's now claiming that she had constantly injuries for years but got brushed off as growing pains and playing too hard.


Maua's first time working with the wheelchair (what?) and her first time at a theater went "as well as can be expected."


Nicole's surgery date finally rolls around. @FREYLIVING DO YOU LOVE ME NOW THAT I AM GETTING THE SURGERY YOU NEEDED TO MAKE SURE YOU DIDN'T STARVE TO DEATH FROM YOUR MALABSORPTION FROM CYSTIC FIBROSIS?! She experiences actual pain for the first time in her life and smacks on that morphine button like her life depends on it.


Of course, nothing says "I desperately needed this feeding tube" like posing with a takeout container in your hospital bed. I like to think Abby is being shady by not only posting this but pointing out the takeout box in the adaptive caption. After all, this EDS biz was Abby's idea in the first place and now that she's had a real surgery, Nicole is once again the more successful munchie.

So once again Nicole has pulled ahead in the Sams Sisters' Sickest Spoonie Sprint. Will Abby take this blow lying down, or will she pull out all the stops to prove once and for all that she is the sick one and Nicole's just her sister? Find out whenever I get the next post edited!

 

[Jimmy Dean Bowl]

these sounded exactly like what years of heavy smoking and stress rather than scleroderma.

In defence of the potential munchie, there is an extremely rare form of scleroderma that I forget the name of right now that affects the internal organs rather than the skin.
Potentially this lady may have this type and it's affecting her lungs, but I feel Occam's Razor applies in this case, as it most often does.

Let's consider the evidence:
- mental health issues
- used suicide to gain attention
- same rare condition as friend

In my opinion, congratulations, you have a brand new pet munchie!
It's a big responsibility, I hope you have plenty of attention to go round.

 

[lolcow yoghurt]

In defence of the potential munchie, there is an extremely rare form of scleroderma that I forget the name of right now that affects the internal organs rather than the skin.
Potentially this lady may have this type and it's affecting her lungs, but I feel Occam's Razor applies in this case, as it most often does.

Let's consider the evidence:
- mental health issues
- used suicide to gain attention
- same rare condition as friend

In my opinion, congratulations, you have a brand new pet munchie!
It's a big responsibility, I hope you have plenty of attention to go round.

I'm not sure if actual scleroderma develops fast or slow but her "disease" surely developed less than a year. She started working from home during the pandemic, didn't go outside often, gained weight suddenly and came out to say that she got really sick in a year. Months later she was diagnosed with scleroderma. She showed to me her fingers turning white and purple as a proof of her "disease", a similar thing is described as a symptom of scleroderma but how do you even tell it's not self-inflicted? I experienced a similar thing on my hands when wearing something with tight elastics in its sleeves.

Do people with actual scleroderma use a lot of medications?

 

[Sparkling Yuzu]

They make a Christmas tree out of Creamy Delicious Kate Farms and zofran wrappers.

Ha, I remember when pill bottle art was novel and news stories would be made about it. Then it became a trend for online munchies and I bet it is now passe.

She burns herself with boiling water and laughs so hard she vomits. But it’s not a mental illness.

Channeling that Terry energy.

She’s taking Christian anthropology

Is that a real thing or some bullshit apologetics like those Christian archaeology magazines that never question anything from the bible?

she still won’t eat because she has full-body intestinal pain.

Maybe her kintype is amorphous globosa.

"Freediving with a heart condition is probably one of the most dangerous things I've considered doing." hahah okay your supposed POTS is not exactly a fatal arrhythmia that could kill you at any second.

What a dramaqueen. Freediving is potentially dangerous for anyone and people with heart conditions would probably seek medical guidance before deciding to be a rebel and wing it with impromptu freediving.

Meanwhile Nicole has been prescribed "try drinking water?"

Imagine trying to counsel some healthy neurotic chick in a busy ER about DRINKING WATER.

sis, you have peanut butter rice cakes on the ground. First of all, ew. That's the room where you poop, why are you eating in it? And the toilet is like right there next to the food.

Is this an ED thing? Trying to associate food with gross stuff like bathrooms?

using a cane because her nausea makes her feel bad

Life protip: don't take Gravol just suddenly start using a cane when nauseous.

The dog had an accident in the body shop then started puking but because Abby's vehicle was the one in the shop and Nicole can't drive, she had to make the sick dog suck it up and stay there for hours. So lethargy from illness + shutting down from stress = real service dog.

Poor baby. I feel so bad for that dog.

Kate Farms is NOT LYING about the mercury content of their products!!!!

Oh god, I didn't know they had their own version of the Gfuel and Sugarbear gummies scandal. Hopefully only munchies use their crappy products and not people with real health issues.

She experiences actual pain for the first time in her life and smacks on that morphine button like her life depends on it.

So common in munchies, no wonder some of them like Chelsea become junkies and OD.

 

[Gengar]

She does not experience any hunger when not eating. She feels only pain when eating. It is only through sheer will and determination that she eats pizza quesadillas and granola cookies to keep her weight up. She's in pain and has a migraine from the effort.

This is a little strange to me. I've followed a lot of anachans throughout the years and I can confidently conclude that anorexia doesn't absolve you from hunger - in fact half of ana posts are how skinny they feel when they feel hunger pains, and the absence of hunger is in fact a very bad thing. Anorexics  want food. So either Nicole's faking, or chalking it up to be totally dramatic.

Also - let's just say that I know for certain that the only way it's plausible to not experience hunger and actually feel pain while eating is if you take medication that severely represses your appetite. It's very annoying to crave the concept of food but being unable to finish it, even if it's your most favourite thing in the world. God forbid if you eat just a a teensy bit over your normal portion because you'd just feel like exploding. It's actually very much through sheer will that you get your minimum calorie intake - though I guess if Nicole is claiming GI over an eating disorder, I suppose it makes sense, but it's not giving realistic skinny princess behaviour if that's your munch of choice.

 

[glioblastoma multiforme]

I can confidently conclude that anorexia doesn't absolve you from hunger

it can for the most part. not defnitely. have heard of stories from anorexics that said they weren't hungry the vast majority of the time, and if they did get hungry the mere thought of eating was enough to satiate them. i guess it depends on how strong the disease is and how much the mind-body connection is severed. mind over matter can be extremely powerful. refeeding, even under proper medical supervision, can cause intense pain though could easily by psychosomatic.

but i think the hunger must still be there, just totally overridden.

 

[Jimmy Dean Bowl]

I'm not sure if actual scleroderma develops fast or slow but her "disease" surely developed less than a year. She started working from home during the pandemic, didn't go outside often, gained weight suddenly and came out to say that she got really sick in a year. Months later she was diagnosed with scleroderma. She showed to me her fingers turning white and purple as a proof of her "disease", a similar thing is described as a symptom of scleroderma but how do you even tell it's not self-inflicted? I experienced a similar thing on my hands when wearing something with tight elastics in its sleeves.

Do people with actual scleroderma use a lot of medications?

It's generally rapid onset, although cases can vary.

What she showed you sounds like Raynaud's phenomenon/disease, which is one of the symptoms of scleroderma.
However, Raynaud's is common in the general population and is something that she has probably had for years, and has now realised she can use for munchie grift.
Raynaud's appears in response to cold/stress. You said this woman is a very stressed individual, so the appearance of common vasospasm in a stressed person ≠ evidence of a rare disease.

The weight gain - yeah, sounds like pandemic chowing down.

As for scleroderma medications, it's usually immunosuppressants and maybe a calcium channel blocker such as nifedipine if the Raynaud's is bad.

I'd understand weight gain if it was as a result of taking steroids, but she claimed she wasn't diagnosed until months after she gained the weight.

Jimmy's final conclusion:
STILL A MUNCHIE

 

[std::string]

However, Raynaud's is common in the general population and is something that she has probably had for years, and has now realised she can use for munchie grift.

Pretty much. I'm assuming she's probably 25-45 years old or so? That's when you would expect primary Raynauds to show up. Risk is higher for women and higher in smokers as well.

Compared to scleroderma which is rare as hell (0.025% prevalence in the general population using the highest estimate.) Not everyone gets to be a zebra, sorry.

 

[Kate Farms Shill]

Part 4 of Abby and Nicole Sams, our identical twins spiraling deeper into munchie bullshit the longer they live together. In part 1 Nicole falls down the rabbit hole of Tumblr diagnoses and adopts a shelter pit bull service dog for anxiety while Abby is athletic and travels the world. In part 2, Abby decides she wants to be sick too and gets an EDS diagnosis and a wheelchair while Nicole starves herself and runs to the ER until she gets a nasogastric feeding tube. Part 3, Nicole decides the NG tube is not very fun and goes back to starving herself then sees Abby’s quack to get an EDS diagnosis of her very own. Abby gets herself a rescue pit bull to pretend is her service dog just like Nicole has. We concluded with Nicole successfully starving herself into a g-tube surgery. Let’s dive back in.

Spoiler: it takes two

Nicole is released from the hospital after surgery and still experiencing pain. Meanwhile, Abby confirms for us that by “bracing” she means she is pressing down on her dog’s spine and using her as a crutch when she wants to stand up. Bracing is a really good way to cripple your dog and I don’t care about your weight differential. A dog’s spine is not meant for that, you attention seeking idiot.


They sent Nicole home with only toradol for the pain after she tells them EDS makes her metabolize pain meds too fast. Swing and a miss. She might have granulation tissue forming around her stoma.


ME TOO!! I NEED SURGERY TOO!! Abby goes to the gyno and she might have endometriosis but they need to do exploratory surgery to confirm it. She also has a cyst.


Nicole goes back to her gastro who loosens her bumper and tells her it’s infected lol whoops. He’s also not mad that a week after her surgery she’s still not using the tube at all. In fact, the first time she tries is the day of her GI appointment, when she only wants to run pedialyte and finds out that her pump doesn't work. How has she been surviving without this necessary surgical intervention? By eating, of course.


Well, at least she’s letting it heal before she starts decorating it.


..or not. NOTICE ME MARY FREY WHY DON’T YOU EVER RESPOND TO ME AFTER I GOT YOUR HANDWRITING TATTOOED ON MY CALF?!


Working on pulling me, getting doors, bracing, and retrievals but she has no natural retrieval drive.” STOP DOING THIS. You’re fine, the dog is going to need the damn wheelchair soon.


Both girls are now waxing poetic. Abby about how she yearns to run without pain like she does in her dreams. Don't we all?


And Nicole about how coming back to her apartment made the transformation official: “my healthy self is dead, my old self. I’m new.” Holy fuck.


She’s adding doterra to her kate farms because she can’t shit. Other people tell her the fiber content of Kate Farms makes it a poor choice for GP. It’s the only one she can tolerate! Also advising other munchies to switch from the osmotic laxative they were recommended by their doctors to stimulant ones. Neat! Kate farms lurking like vultures of course. And she admits she’s paying for this out of pocket because her insurance said no. Or I guess I should say Nicole’s parents are paying for it because she doesn’t work.


Nicole is such a good little shill for Kate Farms that they put her on their website!!! Someone in the comments wants to know how they, too, can talk a doctor into tubing them. Nicole tells them this is for celiac and she only got it after they discovered “nerve damage” (the alleged dysmotility) when she went off her feeds and tried to eat orally again – no, that never happened. Her endoscopy, biopsies, and esophageal manometry were all normal save a small polyp and a healed ulcer, and she never had any kind of motility testing done. She was diagnosed entirely on self-reported symptoms by her own description.


Hahaha omg omg Abby claims when she’s in a flare she gets “t-rex legs." They suddenly develop contractures at the knees that she cant’ straighten so she has to stalk around like a t-rex on bent knees. Her proof of this is a pic of her laying in bed with her knees bent showing her braces are on way too fucking tight, gee wonder why her foot fell asleep. She claims the last time lasted two months but she’s never mentioned it despite all her whining about her legs and mobility and even when she first got the wheelchair we’ve never had a period when she was using it exclusively. I think she’s just realized if she over tightens her braces she can cause a problem.


Abby goes out with friends she hasn’t seen in a long time, uses her wheelchair she never uses because t-rex legs or because the attention and asspats temporarily outweigh the inconvenience. More importantly you can see Pippi’s chest and that she’s definitely nursed pups before Nicole got her.


Meanwhile, Nicole has an eating disorder and/or her conscience is catching up with her. She describes how she feels guilty for still wanting to eat pizza and drink Starbucks like a normal person after getting her feeding tube. So this is kinda interesting because we saw what she chose to eat during the “forcing myself to stay alive” era and it was stuff like starbucks, hot cocoa, cookies, brownies, nutella wraps, and pizza. As long as it was nominally gluten free and under whatever calorie limit she’d assigned herself, she could eat it. I think now that she has the tube she swore she needed and her gastro is expecting her to actually use it, she’s realized if she does run feeds and also eats she’ll gain weight. I don’t really think she was purging in the traditional sense although I guess we’ll see if she starts “draining” everything, but I do think she was making herself so worried about everything she ate that she was involuntarily (but happily) throwing a lot of it back up.


Well this is interesting. Their grandfather died and we learn that he had MS and his main problem in his final years was pain and weakness in his legs. Hm. Where have I heard this before?


Nicole illustrates her grief over grandpa’s passing with a bikini pic to show off her tube and a woe-is-me about how grandpa’s death has meant she had no time to grieve for herself. She longs to go back to her old life – not the one where she was healthy, but two weeks ago when she was just post-op and still happy with her new toy.


Oh. Here’s the real problem. Their lease is ending and she’s having a poopy pants tantrum about having to move home temporarily and then into a new place. They thought they were going to find a new place in time but they didn’t so now there’s a one month gap between when their lease ends and when their new place is open.


Abby wakes up feeling like her chest is on fire, she can’t breathe, and she can’t move because everything is so heavy and hurts. But she bravely puts on her game face and takes Nicole’s Kate Farms tote to the bakery so she can get some brownies! Her illness won’t win!!!! Kate farms’ social media loves this!


Nicole still has an eating disorder. Her sister brings her coffee but she forgets to ask what kind of syrup is in it. This unknown variable makes her have a panic attack/""allergic reaction"" because her tubestie claims she has MCAS which means now she does too. She takes benadryl and uses some aromatherapy oils to calm down.


Abby once again forgets she’s sick because she goes swimming. Yeah it’s low impact exercise and good for the joints but it’s just her pattern of always claiming she just forgets she’s sick and disabled when there's something more fun to do.


For example: her disease fucks off when she flies to Pittsburgh…


...Because she’s been chosen to be American Eagle/Aerie’s first wheelchair model. The healthy girl who hops out of her wheelchair whenever it starts getting inconvenient. The wheelchair she bought herself for social media attention after a dozen doctors said she didn't need one. Not someone who actually has a spinal cord injury or some debilitating condition or even someone who pretends to use one regularly. Fuck bringing awareness to a real disability. Abby is healthy looking and has aesthetic forest pictures and self-aggrandizing social media posts and that's what this brand wants representing them!


Nicole is alone at home and has never been so scared because her doggie broke her nail. She takes the dog to the vet and the vet removes the damaged nail. Pippi is fine, but Nicole keeps having flashbacks and was sure Pippi would die from a broken nail.


Back home from becoming a professional disability LARPer, Abby hurts her back standing up. She appears to be in real pain for once because she said her brain can’t “block it out” like it can her constant leg pain and it's actually preventing her from doing things.


You might think this is Nicole studying for her first nursing classes but no, she’s still going to a school with no nursing program and this is just her talking about how she constantly checks her pulse manually and on her smart watch and wants to get a blood pressure cuff so she can check that too. She also says she can tell her blood sugar from her heart rate.


She also makes one for epilepsy and in the corner we see that her chosen "advocate" for it is the tubestie. We know what she's going for next.


(The comments from this person about how she feels excluded from her CRPS one because it doesn't mention the specific treatments she uses also made me laugh. I am feel uncomfortable when we are not about me?)


Abby pushes herself to go shopping without her wheelchair (why) even though the endometriosis she’s never been diagnosed with is kicking her ass and causing her to dislocate. She spends her shopping trip at Aldi flopping around on the floor with her dog on her lap.


At home the next day for a bedroom photo shoot: wheelchair.


She buys a new brace and hopes it gives her some freedom back because “I can’t always have my wheelchair with me.’ haha jesus christ kid, just say “I want all the social media attention a wheelchair brings me but I don’t want it to impact my real life in any meaningful way.” I'm sure real wheelchair users would love the option to just ditch it when they want to walk on the beach or climb trees.


Here we find out the sudden obsession with Doterra is because Mommy’s a rep and now Nicole has bought into it hoping to make money without having to get a job.


Both girls are now doing daily updates instead of our old pattern of Nicole constantly spamming her socials and Abby updating to shit out a pearl every now and then. Abby’s endometriosis "dissipates" but now her leg pain is back and she needs another brace for her other leg. She’s also bought into Bang shoes which Faith Morfitt/Wildflowers in her Hair was also into. It’s not an MLM – she doesn’t have a “downline” she ropes into it – but she does get commission if people buy the shoes using her links and she constantly spams their hashtags like #bangsblitz which makes a bunch of other people selling the shoes come to her comments to excitedly shriek about Blitz Day. I hate social media.


PLEASE BUY MY OILS. See the bottom comment which is her actual real-life grandma.


Maua’s still miserable when she has to work.


“Maybe I’m just being overdramatic about everything.” Yes. That’s the answer. This is a poopy pants temper tantrum because she keeps trying to join adaptive sports teams and they keep insisting these teams are only for disabled people so she can’t join. Fucking burn. Yanno if she committed to the wheelchair act they probably would let her join but like Nicole crying that she can’t run her tube feeds, eat junk food, AND keep her weight down, Abby wants to be able to be wheelchair barbie when there’s a real or perceived benefit (joining a sports team, being an Aerie model) but reserve the right to get out of it whenever the inconvenience exceeds the benefits. We’ve already seen her whine about how she doesn’t like shopping with her chair, not because she’s still fighting reality and being “stubborn” about her diagnoses but because people stare at her when she stands up to get something off a high shelf and she doesn’t want to have to shop like a real wheelchair user. Thus going shopping with just Maua – still screams ‘I’m sick’ but when she needs something off the high shelf no one calls her out for faking.


Nicole gets her “dangler” switched out for a button and discovers the joy of propofol. Her tubestie is having hers changed tomorrow! Wow nicole has two twinsies! Also she has a giant ulcer around her tube site. I’m sure it’s fine. Allergy bracelet says she’s allergic to corn syrup, pollen (do people really report pollen allergies on these things?) and wheat.


@FREYLIVING REMEMBER WHEN I TATTOOED YOUR HANDWRITING ON ME??? Parasocial shit is wild and foreign to me. If even one of my close friends surprised me by getting my handwriting tattooed on them I would be so weirded out I would have trouble still talking to them at least for a while. A total stranger who only knows me from a one-sided social media relationship? Fuck it, time to leave the internet and burn every internet-enabled device i own.


Abby is thrilled because finally one of those para sports teams got over themselves and their real disabilities and saw that Abby was disabled enough to compete with them! And it’s swimming, that sport that she’s already told us makes all her symptoms mysteriously vanish! What luck! Posing in her brace and wheelchair to celebrate.


Next post: standing next to her boyfriend on a deck.


Meanwhile, shortly after she almost died of fright because Pippi broke a nail, Nicole puts her on an escalator where she could have had much worse happen. It takes an instant for one of their claws to get stuck and for their whole paw to get sucked into an unthinking machine.


“She brings out my true happiness even if it’s just watching youtube or dreaming about food.” Aww Nicole found an ana buddy.


Abby is sad. Nothing is going right and she’s just spiraling into depression.


Oh, it’s because her mom went to Tanzania on that mission trip Abby used to go on all the time and Abby did not. i guess faking sick was a poor life choice when it means mom tells you you're too sick to go to Africa. Also lol @ Nicole planning to make ana-chan approved zucchini noodles for dinner. I'm sure that's fine for whatever digestive thing she claims is plaguing her at the current moment.


Maua has what should be considered a veterinary emergency after she swallows a toy and vomits eleven times in an hour from it. Tough shit, Maua, we only go to the ER if the humans need attention, not for actual emergencies. Instead Abby whines about having a cold.


And forces Maua to go to Target the next day because Mommy needs attention.


Nicole announces that she’s taking her doggie to Disney and also that she’s got psychogenic seizures just like her tubestie has!


Maua’s being rehomed. No she’s not washing out. Abby thinks she’s just perfectly trained but she’s been made aware of another girl who needs a service dog so she’s selflessly giving up her perfect dog to this girl. Nothing about this sounds true to me. I think Maua was a lot more of a behavior problem than Abby would ever admit to and that’s why she’s gone. But she can’t just say Maua's washing out because people will ask why, so she goes with the selfless god-is-working-through-me line. Also ‘my crutch’ ARE YOU AWARE THEY MAKE CRUTCHES THAT AREN’T DOGS???


Nicole is also sad about the dog. She eats fro-yo but the tube hurts real bad and anything she eats hurts, plus her feeds hurt, and she’s still making herself so anxious after everything she eats that she vomits in public trashcans.


Abby is just so proud of herself for taking this rare modeling opportunity from someone with a real disability. With her modeling/ambassador gig and her cripple sports team validating her really real disability she has restored the status quo. Abby is once again the athletic, outgoing, accomplished one whose problems are real but she doesn't let them get her down. Nicole is back to being the whiny crybaby who pretends she has whatever her social media buddies have for attention and gets told it's in her head. Nicole may have a dog that doesn't embarrass her but Abby has real accomplishments like cheating to compete on a sports team meant for disabled people.


All these news outlets agree that she's truly n' honestly disabled because some clothing company decided to let her be their rent-a-cripple.


Meanwhile Nicole is still making these notes about diseases she reads about on social media. Please go for a GBS saga like the eternal queen of my heart Amanda "Skinwalker" Winig. It will complete me.


She wakes up with her hip all loose and her shoulder hurty, she still isn't running feeds two months after she had surgery, and she complains of intense hunger all the time even though last time the line was she never feels hunger and forces herself to eat. She's only running water and electrolytes through the tube but don't worry. Granny tells her she looks well-hydrated.


"I totally forgot I was sick!"


Nicole changes her tube. I would like to point out two comments. One is woman whose daughter has a tube because of cerebral palsy who comments a few days later to say that Nicole's stoma looks nice and healthy compared to her poor daughter's. FUCK YOU IT DOES NOT IT TOTALLY LOOKS TERRIBLE NOW WITH TONS OF GRANULATION TISSUE!!!

The other is this guy with actual leukemia that seems to make her feel a little bad about her histrionics. She tells him not to compare illnesses and that changing the tube wasn't as bad as she made it out to be.


Abby is in the Adirondacks again with her boyfriend and his family. She totally forgot she was sick!


it's time for the annual Sams family beach trip. Nicole eats lunch and spends the rest of the day curled up in pain. Has she been glutened?! I love that one of her travel essentials is a starbucks drink. Feeding tube.


Her pit bull only broke her down-stay to alert to Nicole's heart rate, not because everyone was having fun and she also wanted to.


Oop, here's the problem with the feeding tube. Nicole and Abby are almost the same size again. If she runs feeds that means she doesn't get to eat and she'll be the fat twin again.


Compare to last summer before the tube saga started, when Nicole was markedly thinner than Abby. Now Abby's back to working out and in better shape and Nicole's doctor expects her to pump herself full of calories even when she's not eating.


After a week at the beach where neither twin whines about her health, they head to Florida and of course Nicole's symptoms are through the roof again on the way there.


They go to Disney where Abby uses the wheelchair she didn't need the whole time she was frolicking around on the beach.


And Nicole's dog is fucking miserable.


After Disney Nicole cries about being in pain and purges in the shower.


Nicole is reacting to fruit now but she doesn't care as long as she has her Doterra essential oil Breathe blend!


Abby is peddling her Deep Thots to her new audience she gained from the Aerie campaign. "there's so much fun in memories, but they're not memories of childhood that pluck at my mind, but rather memories of a body unbroken." Oh brother. She can't even eat because the force of cutting her food up makes her fingers sublux. so uh, EDS doesn't "flare" like this. It's not like you wake up one day and gosh darnit your connective tissue is just so loosey-goosey compared to yesterday.


She and the wheelchair she only uses when there's some major benefit that exceeds the inconvenience are featured front and center in this ad campaign.


They move to a new house together and Abby would like us to know that moving sucks more for her than anyone else. Her undiagnosed endometriosis is really flaring now!


Nicole's not sure if her broken belly is from gastroparesis, but whatever it is the EDS caused it. She still hasn't started running tube feeds because the surgery made her nerves "flare up."


Nicole is very depressed. She thought this move would fix everything in her life but it hasn't.


Abby makes her own ring splints for her hypermobile fingers.


Wow, so hyperextended!


Nicole manages a smoothie for the first time in months. No allergy! She also eats raw vegetables with ranch. What a perfect diet for someone with GI problems so severe she needs a feeding tube who claims her stomach is additionally so sensitive she can't run her feeds. The lemonade is sugar free, of course.


Abby is painting custom bibles and journals but it's so hard with her severely hypermobile fingers.


Lol people really pay her to do these middle school paintings on their holy book?


Nicole buys $75 (each!) ankle braces despite only ever claiming her hips were a problem. She tags #smo #afo. SMO is supra malleolar orthotics and they're usually used to correct flat-footedness. AFOs are ankle-foot orthotics and they're the ones that go up the calf. These are neither. They're advertised as a low-profile rigid brace for sports injuries and sold at sporting good stores.


She gets her first job and it's two hour shifts three days a week between classes. I guess it's just work study or short shifts in the campus coffee shop or some shit. So she's taking A&P with a lab, Stats, and communication. At least that's nursing prereqs except for maybe communication. She later specifies that this class is interpersonal communication which she probably needs if she intends on having any sort of job that faces the public.


She is palpably jealous she wasn't the one Aerie chose to be a model.


Abby has decided not to join the paraswimming team. Her conscience get the best of her? Nope, she lost her job and now she can't afford the fees and gas. In the comments, people who don't know there's nothing wrong with her say they'd give her their working legs if they could. I mean, I guess it would be an equal exchange, working legs for working legs.


REEEE I'M NOT FAKING JUST BECAUSE YOU SEE ME WALKING AROUND JUST FINE WITHOUT MY CHAIR.


Abby doesn't have endometriosis. She has "benign marble-sized tumors in the muscle of an organ." Uterine fibroids maybe? Also cringe at the foot fetish weirdo in her comments. I would really like to go back to a time when fetishists were shunned, ashamed, and did not feel free to announce what makes their dicks hard everywhere they go.


Nicole starts her classes again. Their old house was a two mile walk away from campus but their new one is way across town. Now she's having to navigate by public transportation. No one even gave up their seat for a healthy, able-bodied girl with an accessory dog!! She's claiming to have a seizure disorder on pippi's new vest even though they're PNES at best and more likely just something she's skinwalking from Memberly.


It's her first day of work! God knew something bad was going to happen and "guided her away from a job." Working is just not in His plan for her. Man I want that religion, where do I sign up? Just the part where god says I don't have to go to work if I don't feel like it please.


She's taking fewer classes, but they're way more difficult than her usual folklore and Harry Potter culture classes so she's even more stressed out.


The twins go up to the lake where their family had a house when they were younger. As per usual, Abby's disease magically fucks off because there's a body of water for her to play in. Nicole's comes crashing back into the room like the Kool Aid Man because there's family meals she's not totally in control of.


Back home, Nicole has a CT scan to figure out why she still has anorexia.


Abby is back to masturbating over how very smart and deep and special and unique and brave she is every day.


She may have accidentally dislocated and relocated her sternum in her sleep, which she assures us is a thing that happens with EDS. Abby has been proselytizing to her new audience in nearly every post these days. I'm skipping over dozens of posts where it's just "I woke up in a bad mood so I turned to the Word." [5 paragraphs of pseudo-deep bible sperging]


Nicole should consider that nursing may not be for her if she gets stressed out and cries over a slight problem and is in such horrible pain from having to walk a mile.


Surprise, her CT scan is also normal. They know there's a problem, they just can't find it.


Me too! Don't forget Abby's sick too!! Her doctor tells her to stop taking the medicine for her tumors or whatever they are. Birth control maybe. I don't know man.


Nicole feels all seizure-y in class but Pippi sits on her lap so it goes away. She's making a gluten free belgian waffle the size of a tea saucer last for two meals.


Pippi is sick but it wasn't in God's plan for Nicole to work. GIB because apparently it's still in His plan to take the dog to the vet.


Abby is taking a full courseload and she cries all the time now but thanks to those braces her friends bought her shes been able to bike and do yoga every day! Her legs are holding on by threads. I wonder if her livedo reticularis will mysteriously make a comeback once it gets cold.


Pippi's doing much better (no thanks to you cheapskates who wouldn't pay for her to see a vet! God is watching, people!) but Nicole now needs Abby's old forearm crutch because Pippi can't work right now. It's just so funny because it's not like with Abby where she was using Maua as a literal crutch. Nicole claims Pippi's tasks are all alerts and DPT so a forearm crutch in no way replaces her. It's entirely because if she leaves the dog home and doesn't have some other outward signal of illness people will assume she's fine. Her classmates might even start thinking she doesn't need a dog with her.


Abby lacks collagen in her right wrist, specifically. "a year and a half ago I couldn't lift my legs more than a few inches" I invite you to scroll back through these posts and find one (1) period in her post history where she could have been unable to walk for any significant length of time. Remember she doesn't have to show us all this. If she only took pics in the wheelchair and never mentioned people calling her fake when she stands up, we'd have no way to prove she was walking.


Next post: Went to the farmers market, left my wheelchair home in case it was inaccessible. Why not bring it in case it was?


Nicole has a gastro appointment coming up and she has a feeling a GJ is going to be the next step since she still won't run her feeds. She's not against it, she just doesn't think it's going to be the thing that helps her pain.


She has a panic attack because of a simulated party in her communications class and fails her stats test (but it's not her fault! all the questions were unfair!!!)


But her GI appointment went okay! They're changing her button to see if that's the issue and if it's not then her next steps are a GJ for feeding AND a PICC for fluids. She's still not totally satisfied because she keeps telling them it's clearly inflammation and infection and they're just not listening. IDK what she's even trying to get out of them. Autoimmune diagnosis? TPN? One of Mary Frey's CF complications?


pre-nursing school is going great! maybe she should spend more time studying stats and less time photoshopping herself in Hairy pooter land.


Abby has realized that sitting around all day has made her even less flexible than she was before so now she's doing yoga all the time even though she hates it.


here's the video of her dislocating her shoulder. This is 100% a dislocation and not just a pop!

Nicole's friend has MS now. Please tell me she's skinwalking the Sams twins' dead grandpa, I have been a good shill all year and I do not ask for much.


Her tube pain is better but she still wants IV fluids.


Abby's "blood pooling" and "presyncope face" look like being a little hot and sweaty in the Georgia summer and crying to me, respectively.


Mm. Looks... spongy. So a funny aside is Abby is on this prolonged anti-plastic kick where she's measuring exactly how much plastic waste she uses per week in a mason jar and finding ways to eliminate as much as possible. Meanwhile Nicole is using a shitload more plastic than she ever has with all her one-time-use feeding tube supplies.


Her pain is sporadic. She's anxious all day about a test but writing about it like it's some profound feeling she alone experiences. Why is she like this?


Nicole has been cleared for a GJ!!


claiming she's still the same weight she was a year ago. I guess if we account for the fact that she was exercising like crazy in Chicago and in Georgia she has gotten progressively more sedentary it would explain stable weight with growing size. but also if she's not running feeds and maintaining her weight with just eating food why does she need a feeding tube? It's a mystery she can't explain.


Nicole is still pretending her sports braces are AFOs.


I was 100% expecting Abby to claim this was her CRPS flaring or something dumb. I am pleasantly surprised when she admits she's just an idiot who sits in the sun for hours without sunscreen.


She's in so much pain after sitting in the sun for hours and walking miles. She worries what will happen when she transitions from online classes to in-person.


Nicole wears unnecessary scrub pants and a nursing shirt to her A&P exam. She's been studying for weeks and still doesn't do great on it. That's okay because she's a spoonie and it's harder for her than everyone else to learn the material, so by that metric she did an amazing job. Nursing is an awesome idea for her. "I know I accidentally gave your baby a fatal dose of insulin instead of a vitamin K shot but I have ADHD and am a little retarded, so if you just lower the bar for me I did great."


The Samses go on a hike. My goodness, look how hypermobile Abby is! Poor dear definitely needs a brace on that left leg, it's practically bending backwards without a sufficiently stabilizing brace.


Nicole is very anxious and upset and can't relax. She knows she needs a GJ tube and PICC to be complete. It's not in her head tho.


Abby goes to New York and is so angry that everything seems to be inaccessible for a wheelchair user like her. She illustrates this with a picture of her sitting in the window sill with her feet propped on her wheelchair. I can't imagine lacking self-awareness to this degree.


Same with Tahoe, so hard in her chair. Good thing she had so many people around to push her places so she could pretend she needed them to. Recall that she didn't use this thing back home when she climbed up a fucking mountain a few days ago.


Meanwhile, Nicole is FINALLY getting her well-earned GJ-tube and they give her a sticker for being a very brave girl. Look at that self-satisfied smile!

And since the last two have also ended with Nicole getting a new feeding tube, we'll end here. Abby has regained the lead in the Sams Sisters' Sickest Spoonie Sprint by being legitimized by various groups and has a big new audience to prove it. Meanwhile Nicole stalls out and spends the entire six months this post covers trying over and over again for the same toy. Will she concede that Abby is the spoonie queen and retreat back into her weird social media cloister or will she try to get a taste of Abby's burgeoning fame in the next round?

 

[Aunt Carol]

She’s adding doterra to her kate farms because she can’t shit. Other people tell her the fiber content of Kate Farms makes it a poor choice for GP. It’s the only one she can tolerate! Also advising other munchies to switch from the osmotic laxative they were recommended by their doctors to stimulant ones.

It looks like the TerraZyme in the picture isn't a stimulant laxative, just enzymes and woo-oil:

 

[Kate Farms Shill]

It looks like the TerraZyme in the picture isn't a stimulant laxative, just enzymes and woo-oil:View attachment 5285703

Whoops, I meant to include a shot that expanded the comment thread in question. She tells someone to go off Miralax (PEG 3350) and onto dulcolax (bisacodyl).