Samantha Violet Bushart and the Sammieverse - Fat, Illiterate Perpetual Pregnancy Faker and the Various Trash and Tards Surrounding Her

[REGENDarySumanai]

She finally has the black baby she always wanted, delivering it alive is another thing. We better not get another Nutella baby.

 

[Wine em Dine em 69 em]

Is this Darnell Saginaw Michigan Holmes’ first babby? If so, that’s highly suspicious. A hottie like him should have lots of babbies. Makes me wonder what Sammie was doing during the many breakups they’ve had.

 

[eDove]

Is this Darnell Saginaw Michigan Holmes’ first babby? If so, that’s highly suspicious. A hottie like him should have lots of babbies. Makes me wonder what Sammie was doing during the many breakups they’ve had.

Wouldn't it be hilarious if the baby came out white?

 

[Jimmy Dean Bowl]

Wouldn't it be hilarious if the baby came out white?

"I got a super rare melanin eatin disease, that's why the baby is white!
All them haydurs know nuffin!"
Sammie, probably.

 

[WhineMeDineMe69Me]

"I got a super rare melanin eatin disease, that's why the baby is white!
All them haydurs know nuffin!"
Sammie, probably.

She basically does this now with her other (actual) kids, considering she (sometimes) claims their fathers are also black dudes.

 

[Xenomorph]

Dear God let this baby be smart enough to yeet itself.

 

[vanilla_pepsi_head]

It seems like sitting around inventing baby names that are, if nothing else, original (albeit retarded) is Sammie's absolute favorite thing. Maybe even her favorite part of the pregnancy larps. But her real children ended up with not-stupid names, so either Sammie is just fucking around with shit like "Genesis Printhas" or "Weezy" but has enough sense not to name an actual kid that (unlikely), or someone (i.e. Ma Bushart or maybe Austin) managed to nix any stupid ideas. Sammie probably doesn't care that much what her kids' name actually ends up being - she loves the idea of being pregnant, but she is just a retard playacting how she's seen actual expectant mothers behave. After she spurts out the kid her favorite part of the game is over and she loses interest, so that's when I can see her just agreeing to whatever name Ma Bushart suggests without much of a fuss. So I'm going to bet that if a live birth somehow happens that the name will be something disappointingly mundane and sensible, maybe another one named after a Bushart relative. However, after raising two of Sammie's hellions Ma Bushart may be fucking over it, and even if he by some miracle stays around we can rule out Darnell as a potential voice of reason because I have my doubts he's even fucking sentient, so there's still some hope that it might end up being something hilarious. I suggest Krystal Methany if it's a girl.

Since it's this thread, what I actually expect to happen is a miscarriage that happens early enough that it still looks like a creepy slimy alien, but late enough that she can dress it up for pictures and post it all over Boomerbook. At least no one will stop Sammie from giving a miscarriage the stupidest name imaginable if she wants, a dead baby isn't going to care if its name is embarrassing. Even if it's unlikely to survive I'm just floored that Sammie could even conceive offspring with whatever species Darnell is.

 

[Xenomorph]

Could you imagine just how UGLY this demon spawn will be?

 

[iSaidShhh]

Question for those of you more well-versed in Sammieverse lore: Has she ever gotten her ass beat for making incredibly creepy fake Facebook profiles and pretending to be other people that she knows? It would be one thing for her to make sockpuppets with fake names, but straight up pretending to be Darnell's sister or whatever is so goddamn weird.

 

[omori]

What the fuck would the pairing between a methed up bog corpse and a bloated ham look like? I must know.

 

[lindsayfan]

it's time for *~ posi posting ~*
yes, a tiny ray of light in the deformed chocolate-baby darkness of the sammieverse.



queen kristie is slenderizing, going to her doctor appts, taking her meds AND maintaining personal hygiene

 

[Jimmy Dean Bowl]

it's time for *~ posi posting ~*
yes, a tiny ray of light in the deformed chocolate-baby darkness of the sammieverse.

View attachment 5298724

queen kristie is slenderizing, going to her doctor appts, taking her meds AND maintaining personal hygiene

"I've took my bath..."

Her annual bath?

 

[The Taco Santo!]

Still more effort than I've seen from any of the Arkansas Redneck All-Star Review in quite a while.

 

[fenny]

We really tempted fate by saying Sammie'd been boring, huh

 

[Kirk Van Houten]

There’s trouble in Sammadise.







ETA “you got that right”

 

[Jimmy Dean Bowl]

There’s trouble in Sammadise.

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SAY IT'S NOT SO!
NOT OUR GOLDEN COUPLE!

 

[WhineMeDineMe69Me]

I wonder if Darnell is going to take off now that she's swallowed the watermelon seed for real.

 

[Suspendered]

Love the comedic timing in Darnell’s sister liking Sammie’s post about changing her last name and then Sammie’s retort. Especially considering Sammie so often makes fake profiles for his sisters and interacts with those pages - maybe this was Sammie the whole time.

 

[retard strength II]

Oh no... now ET Baby (who I am sure will make it to term) will also have a rotating cast of random homeless black men to be told is their birthfather (after Mama Shart's eventually forced by the state to take custody).

 

[John Andrews Stan]

It’s extra bizarre to me that Sammie would be pretending to be multiple Holmes family members on public posts yet still wanted Darnell to be her FB friend. She really has no shame.