"Mad at the Internet" - a/k/a My Psychotherapy Sessions

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So quick run down on the chess thing Null, Hans Niemann (mid/lowtier GM) beat Magnus Carlsen (reigning champion for years, gigantic winning record over literally every other high end player) in an in person match. After losing Magnus stated that he was suspicious of the circumstances of his defeat and at some point an investigation was launched. Since there was no actual feasible way for Hans to cheat, in a high profile, over the board game with the security methods in place, like metal detectors, no phones etc, the Vibrating Buttplug meme started. Probably on a forum like 4chan or reddit, no party involved made that claim I believe.

The asian you kept mentioning was Hikaru Nakamura (top 3 GM), who is also a twitch streamer, during the initial allegations he made several comments, including revealing about how Hans had a history of cheating in online matches and in general was one of the main people who made the controversy spread. Hes essentially a chess drama queen who inserts himself into everything tangentially related to chess which is why you probably thought he was involved.
 
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Drexel wants on the show.
 
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Baked Al-Aqsa said:
Oh man, what are the odds Jersh would reference JenniCAM only a couple of hours after I watched a video about it?
Worth a watch. Kinda fascinating piece of internet history that nobody remembers.
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I came to post that too, beat me to it.

Goes to show Josh is one of the true loresmasters of the Internet. He just knows shit like this.
 
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sneedem&feedem said:
View attachment 5308202


Drexel wants on the show.
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I come from the future where Null is able to get fully monetized and needs money to pay for pectoral implants so he interviews Drex. Here's how it goes:

"Josh! Josh! There's something you gotta understand. Women, true females, have vaginas RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT? And men have dicks RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT? When women pretend to be lesbians, because there's no such thing as lesbians, they have to use phallic implements when they have their sex. Gay men, however, don't need fake penises to fuck each other. We got our asses."

"...what does this have to do with you fucking a freshly legal adult that you knew at the onset of her puberty?"

"Black women ain't shit!"
 
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Not Your Secret Santa said:
So quick run down on the chess thing Null, Hans Niemann (mid/lowtier GM) beat Magnus Carlsen (reigning champion for years, gigantic winning record over literally every other high end player) in an in person match. After losing Magnus stated that he was suspicious of the circumstances of his defeat and at some point an investigation was launched. Since there was no actual feasible way for Hans to cheat, in a high profile, over the board game with the security methods in place, like metal detectors, no phones etc, the Vibrating Buttplug meme started. Probably on a forum like 4chan or reddit, no party involved made that claim I believe.

The asian you kept mentioning was Hikaru Nakamura (top 3 GM), who is also a twitch streamer, during the initial allegations he made several comments, including revealing about how Hans had a history of cheating in online matches and in general was one of the main people who made the controversy spread. Hes essentially a chess drama queen who inserts himself into everything tangentially related to chess which is why you probably thought he was involved.
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Great summary. Some additional details:
  • Magnus is regarded as one of the greatest, if not the greatest chess players of all time. This is debatable, but he's as close as it gets to the Wayne Gretzky, Tiger Woods, or Mike Tyson of Chess.
  • As such, him saying he suspects someone of cheating should hold a lot of merit.
  • Magnus played white against Hans and lost
    • for non-chessfags, at the top level you should almost never lose with white (at worse, draw).
  • The GOAT losing with advantage against to an under 2700 elo player is Mike Tyson getting KO'd in the 3rd round.
  • Just like Mike and fans would make up theories that the rookie loaded up his gloves, people made up theories that Hans cheated with anal beads.
  • The next day they were set to play again. Magnus acted like a whiney faggot and withdrew from the tournament, his ego smashed.
  • The next online tournament they had against each other, Magnus forfeit the match after a single move, his ego still smashed.

The short of it is: a GOAT player slipped up and lost to a overall worse player. Magnus, his fans, and Hikaru+Chess.com coped and seethed accusations against Hans of cheating,. The cases were dropped and now Hans can play on chess.com again.
Hans vs Magnus rematch should be on the pipeline and it should be spicy.

I could go on and on, but that's the autistic gist.
 
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GET! said:
i'm ngl saying "all poetry must rhyme" is kind of childish and silly
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Shit opinion. Poetry is only interesting because saying what you want to say while making words rhyme is hard and the rhymes make it sound nice. Any poetry that doesn't rhyme is just pretentious lazy faggots huffing their own farts and the written equivalent of people just drawing a bunch of random ugly shapes on a canvas and calling it art.
 
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