"we have plenty of time to chill"
it's 12pm. the stream started at 10:15am, play the game.
"unless you guys pick it up with more topics, maybe we will end the show early"
it has been almost 3 hours since the stream started. play the game.
phil says labor day is not a real holiday
phil just said he gets "1 full day and 1 half day off a year" he takes a full day off per week.
phil gets a 1$ tip, answers it in a passive-aggressive way, then says the subject of the tip "sounds stupid" before moving on.
i don't think Phil knows what pronouns are.
phil REFUSES to ever play Cyberpunk 2077 ever again. the reason for this is because he demanded a refund for the game after fully beating it and does not actually own it anymore, so he can't play the DLC.
phil complains he never hits the tips goal, immediately after someone, for the sixth time this week, asks phil to play BG3, he refuses. good business sense.
phil says playing Divinity Original Sin 2 "didn't work" for him, despite it consistently exceeding his tips goals every stream.
apparently phil's fans HATED Divinity and wanted it gone, and only phils haters wanted him to play it, his haters also didn't even watch him play it. i watched, phil, I watched....
he is promising he will be doing fightcade around December.
phil ended his podcast then took a, so far, 10 minute piss break. he is just running the clock down until 1pm.
phil is back after taking a 15 minute piss break.
Gameplay starts now
phil is disappointed his giant fucking machine gun runs out of ammo because he just death grips the fire button.
"I have very low ammo in every gun I have"
you have a combined 2600 bullets in your two gatling guns, maybe don't spray everything full force? I also have the gatling gun and I almost never run out of ammo.
"we're already down to a thousand rounds, we've already spent a third of our ammo"
1000 is a third of 1200?
if you ever wanted to know what it looks like for a geriatric to pilot a gundum, just watch these streams.
to the shock of no one, phils is gravitating towards a Tank style AC, so he can tank through everything.
the gimmick of this stage is you need to avoid being nuked from space, phil recognizes this, says it, then proceeded to get nuked from space.
"I dodged it still hit me, what am I supposed to do?"
dodge better.
"it hits me anyway, I have no clue, I dodge and it shoots me anyway, so there's no way to dodge it and now I have no healing. this is a mission im not passing"
well it's a required story mission so, best hope you pass it?
"great, I have no health, how am I supposed to do this?"
and he's dead. rip in piss.
"that is absolutely ridiculous."
"so does the checkpoint get me past the lasers? no? oh, good. what a great checkpoint"
you didn't get past it properly, why would the game let you skip? do it again, fatso.
C-Spider Boss Starts Here
phils build kinda hard counters C-Spider, so phil died because he "forgot" about lock-on, but he'll prolly get it second try.
he is not trying to dodge attacks at all, he is just eating everything C-Spider throws at him and hoping his HP is higher, just like he did with Balteus.
literally watching phil take 3 lazers to the face, not even attempting to dodge.
"it did it again, the lock on failed, and now I'm gonna die-"
he beat C-Spider on his second try with 1hp left.
honestly, might upset some people, but I'm not too surprised. C-Spider only took me around 5 tries, he's really not that hard.
he's doin' arena matches now, which is just NPC duels.
"I didn't dodge anything, I was basically just trying to fill him with bullets and not dodge at all and he got me"
gee, I wonder why.
"he's very fast and maneuverable"
he's using tank treads literally based on a wheel chair, phil.
phil is just doing arenas and dying. his game play is fly above his enemy, constantly circle straf and hold down the attack buttons until either they're dead or he is.
"I couldn't land and get stamina back, I was trying, and I couldn't land to get stamina and start firing again"
you don't need stamina to fire your weapons.
that's 3 deaths now he's done in this duel.
phil is mad people are making him put the correct money on the screen. he says it was off by 1 dollar so who cares.
it's important to credit people properly when they contribute phil, and since you curated an audience who care about goals, it's even more important to be accurate, stupid fuck.
"this is the problem when Derich doesn't have a membership, because people impersonate him"
so why don't you give him one? you could also set him as a VIP, Twitch can do that, I imagine youtube can too, so why not?
begging for money again.
hype bubble blow.
"chat has not moved for 2 minutes, not sure if chat just glitched or something"
I think you've just got 9 people max in your chat, man.
phil died against the PCA warship, which is fucking hilarious. you can kill it in like, 3 hits, phil got caught up in the drones and they just gang raped him.
"how am I supposed to get around that shit?"
"IM TRYING TO FLY, AND THE FUCKING THING KEEPS NOT FLYING, SO ICAN"T GET ABOVE AND I LOSE ALL MY FUCKING HEALTH"
man beats C-Spider in 2 tries, a boss that took Asmongold 4 hours, then gets beat up by the PCA Warship, a ridiculously easy encounter.
phil sprays his machine guns SO MUCH he had an ammo cost of 168,000$ on mission end.
phil is told there's a CGI trailer for ACVI that has story elements not in the game. phil says that's great, you can pay him to watch it on his reacts channel.
he tried to do a stealth mission, he was spotted in under 20 seconds, fission mailed.
phil ends up zooming across the stage because he gorilla grips his controller and accidentally pushed down the analog stick.
"what the fuck, I couldn't see a damn thing, WOW"
phil was supposed to escape an exploding cave, and instead flew directly into the explosion and died.
he has cut the youtube recording and wants to know when the game is fucking over.
phil got absolutely butt fucked by the double PCA mini-bosses.
"I started getting juggled and I never regained my bearings, I couldn't tell what was happening. if you lose your bearings you get screwed, that's definitely a problem with the game"
pretty sure it's a you problem.
"WHAT IS HAPPENING, I CAN'T, DUDE, WHAT THE FUCK, I CAN'T SEE, IT WON'T LET ME SEE"
phil is getting the business rn. the PCA bosses are a duo, one uses long range and the other uses melee, so phil was just getting juggled by these very easy bosses.
phil admits he takes a vitamin D supplement because he never goes outside.
he admits he will not be playing the game 3 times to see all contents and bosses.
phil has unlocked PvP and will not be playing it, because in his words he does not "care for multiplayer in a game like this"
His weird ghost friend tells Phil that there are defense drones he can access to help him fight. Phil apparently completely ignores this and tries to destroy them, then gets confused on why he can't destroy them.
. On another note I beat armored core. Only a couple of bosses are really over the top challenging. It's going to be interesting to see how Phil handles the sea spider and cel 240. People watch streamers play these hard games to see their reactions. Not watch some fat pig get his hand held by chat or read guides and fake reactions. Something Phil doesn't understand.
