Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

[Pedophobe]

Paolinelli probably had no idea Patrick existed yesterday and he's already dunking on him like an old timer. Patposters are the fastest gestating family of mammals known to exist.

 

[DSP's Tax Lawyer]

I love that the guy destroying him today tagged Tor, it's fun when Pat has to deal with reality.

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No stalker child, I can libel a book all I want. Enjoy prison

 

[The Taco Santo!]

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What do you mean?

Insanely gay energy in these photos. He fits right in with the fellas cruising the sauna at his gym.

 

[AnOminous]

Insanely gay energy in these photos. He fits right in with the fellas cruising the sauna at his gym.

You just look at this dude in any picture and think "wow, this man sucks dicks."

 

[Divine right to rule]

And broadswords are light? Really? Entirely made of metal? Unless you are made of muscles you are not going to be able to wield one of them for long.

Also if you were using a halberd you would probably be in formation. Not just fighting alone.

And because polearms in general strongly resembled farm implements, it isn't like you could just disarm the peasants. They couldn't do peasant jobs without very similar tools.

Broadswords are actually pretty light, yeah. But it is true, the main weapon of infantry over hundreds of years was different forms of spears and halberds, used in formation.
The main weapon of knights were never swords, they were the sidearms. They used Lances on the first charge and after that, mostly hammers and axes.
Knights on the ground actually mostly used a Poleaxe , in the late middle ages, that is.

 

[IDanceonTrannyGraves]

Pat losing another lawsuit this year would be the on top.

 

[HarblMcDavid]

Well for a start Broadswords have a basket hilt and date from a couple centuries later than what people whose only knowledge comes from DnD and Fantasy novels call a "Broadsword" by which they typically mean single or double handed longswords.
...

Okay the irony here is that even in DnD (technically pathfinder which is 3.5 based) disagrees with Fatrick:

Katana:

https://www.d20pfsrd.com/equipment/weapons/weapon-descriptions/katana

Note that it's classifed as a 2 handed weapon normally because it is "exotic", though if you blow a proficiency you can use it one handed. That's NOT a quick weapon.

Note that there is no first party broadsword I can find though I swear I remember it existing somewhere in an obscure rulebook, but all the homebrew formulations I found for 3.5 had identical or lower damage to the Katana while being one handed, though one of the formulations is exotic (the basket hilt). Not sure how the exotic part on the basket hilt homebrew works though since the description specifies it has single handed hilt.

The nearest pathfinder datapoint would be the generic longsword, which is a 1D8 martial one handed weapon (you don't need to blow a proficiency on to use that way).

https://www.d20pfsrd.com/equipment/weapons/

So even DnD at best puts these on a similar size and speed scale. This nigga can't even get his fantasy knowledge straight.

 

[AnOminous]

So even DnD at best puts these on a similar size and speed scale. This nigga can't even get his fantasy knowledge straight.

He's literally so retarded he thinks you can just take out tanks with water balloons.

 

[Morethanabitfoolish]

Why the fuck not? Are you just saying you'd prefer to smash it with a tire iron? Why the fuck wouldn't you punch it?

In fairness to the poster you replied to he does not have a punchable face. He has a punchable existence.

I suppose you could call it a punchable soul if you were a religious sort. Hence why even when using a fairly favourable image of himself on Twitter complete strangers see the posts, look at the image and go "I could argue rationally but there is something here that tells me this is an irrational loon who does not deserve reasonable debate."

 

[Alabama Gamer]

Okay the irony here is that even in DnD (technically pathfinder which is 3.5 based) disagrees with Fatrick:

Katana:
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https://www.d20pfsrd.com/equipment/weapons/weapon-descriptions/katana

Note that it's classifed as a 2 handed weapon normally because it is "exotic", though if you blow a proficiency you can use it one handed. That's NOT a quick weapon.

Note that there is no first party broadsword I can find though I swear I remember it existing somewhere in an obscure rulebook, but all the homebrew formulations I found for 3.5 had identical or lower damage to the Katana while being one handed, though one of the formulations is exotic (the basket hilt). Not sure how the exotic part on the basket hilt homebrew works though since the description specifies it has single handed hilt.

The nearest pathfinder datapoint would be the generic longsword, which is a 1D8 martial one handed weapon (you don't need to blow a proficiency on to use that way).
View attachment 5320650

https://www.d20pfsrd.com/equipment/weapons/

So even DnD at best puts these on a similar size and speed scale. This nigga can't even get his fantasy knowledge straight.

The katana has a better crit range, though. 18-20/x2 instead of 19-20/x2. Which it had better do if I'm blowing a feat on it. And if you're crit-fishing you're either a barb or a swashbuckler, in which case you should be using either a falchion or a rapier/scimitar respectively.

Actually, come to think of it, if you can get free EWP the katana is the barest of upgrades for a swashbuckler. With Slashing Grace it can replace the scimitar or rapier and have a damage die one size higher.

 

[Tiberius Rising]

patrick's leveled up from "those are your delusions again" to "wow, your cognitive impairments are getting really bad".

I guess he discovered a thesaurus!

 

[Lord Xenu]

This is a full archive of Pat's YouTube channel as of Sept. 5, 2023. Part 1 of 3

Spoiler

Patrick Tomlinson Performs at GenCon 8/17/13

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1,163 views Aug 21, 2013
Patrick Tomlinson performs a nerdy stand-up set at GenCon on 8/17/13 as the opening act for the Damsels of Dorkington. Please excuse the shaky image, as at this point of the convention the cameraman had been drinking for four days, as is local custom.

Patrick Tomlison Nice Nomination (Note: LOL spells his own name wrong. Published writer here, folks.)

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1,184 views Apr 13, 2014
I do my good deed for a friend.

Patrick Tomlinson at Comedy Cafe 7/30/14

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671 views Aug 4, 2014
A portion of Patrick Tomlinson's showcase set from Milwaukee's Comedy Cafe.

Mr. JJ Caste of Killers Showcase

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183 views Aug 7, 2014
Mr. JJ performs at the 8/01/14 Caste of Killers Comedy Showcase in Karma Bar and Grill.

Patrick Tomlinson GenCon 2014

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1,013 views Aug 19, 2014
Author/Comedian Patrick S. Tomlinson performs an opening set for the Damsels of Dorkington improv troupe at Gen Con Saturday night at the Crown Plaza. 8/16/14

Patrick Tomlinson Hosts The Comedy Club on State

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1,542 views May 16, 2015
Comedian/Author Patrick S. Tomlinson hosts 5/14/15 at Madison's Comedy Club on State.

Star Wars VII Reaction: Toothless the beardie

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358 views Nov 6, 2015
My bearded dragon, Toothless, watches the Japanese Star Wars VII trailer for the first time.

Patrick Tomlinson at Comedy Club on State 2/24/16

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1,118 views Feb 27, 2016
Comedian/Author Patrick S. Tomlinson performs at the Comedy Club on State Street in Madison, WI.

TRIDENT'S FORGE: THE UNBOXENING

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979 views Mar 19, 2016
Author/Comedian Patrick S. Tomlinson unboxes his newest novel, TRIDENT'S FORGE, coming April 5th from Angry Robot Books.

Patrick Tomlinson at CampPain2016

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719 views Apr 1, 2016
Comedian/Author Patrick S. Tomlinson performs for CampPain2016, March 28th, at Zanies in Old Town Chicago.

Part 2 0f 3
Part 3 of 3

 

[Lord Xenu]

full archive of Pat's YouTube channel as of Sept. 5, 2023. Part 2 of 3

Spoiler

Madison's Funniest 2017 Prelims

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444 views Feb 4, 2017
Patrick Tomlinson performs a 3 minute set on Feb 1st at Comedy Club on State for the preliminary round of Madison's Funniest Comic, 2017

Madison's Funniest 2017 Round 1

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455 views Feb 19, 2017
Patrick Tomlinson performs in the 1st round of Madison's Funniest Comic competition.

CHILDREN OF THE DIVIDE Unboxening

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612 views Jul 21, 2017
Author Patrick S. Tomlinson unboxes his latest title, CHILDREN OF THE DIVIDE. Available Aug 1st

GATE CRASHERS: The Unboxening

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819 views Jun 19, 2018
Patrick S. Tomlinson unboxes his newest novel, Gate Crashers

Patrick S. Tomlinson at Comedy on State 6/20/18

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8,608 views Jun 21, 2018
Patrick S. Tomlinson performs a politically-charged set on current events at Madison's Comedy on State, 6/20/18.

2 Minute Rants with Patrick S. Tomlinson: #1: Hard to Look Ahead When We're Falling Behind

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3,670 views Jul 30, 2018
Author Patrick S. Tomlinson discusses the trouble faced by writers trying to see the future when the present seems to be hurtling towards the past.

2 Minute Rants with Patrick S. Tomlinson #2: Paul Manafort Goes to Trial

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1,080 views Jul 31, 2018
More like a five minute rant today. Sorry, lot to say here. Also, I apologize for the sound quality. Learning the importance of a good mic. You'll need to turn up your speakers.

The 4th Annual Roast of Milwaukee: Patrick S. Tomlinson

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1,721 views Aug 1, 2018
Author and comedian Patrick S. Tomlinson roasts the city he loves at Club Garibaldi 7/30/18.

GenCon 2018 Opens

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1,079 views Aug 2, 2018
Author Patrick S. Tomlinson goes to GenCon 2018 and discovers a horde.

Nerds take the field at GenCon 2018

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837 views Aug 4, 2018
Tabletop gamers swarm Lucas Oil Stadium.

 

[Sir Dank-a-Lot]

Rick,

If you meet one asshole, you’ve met an asshole. If all you meet are assholes, then you’re the asshole.

Do have fun.

 

[Lord Xenu]

Full archive of Pat's YouTube channel as of Sept. 5, 2023. Part 3 of 3

Spoiler

Nerds take the field at GenCon 2018

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837 views Aug 4, 2018
Tabletop gamers swarm Lucas Oil Stadium.

2 Minute Rants with Patrick, #4: Trump's imploding so here's our new kitten

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465 views Aug 23, 2018

Robert Mewler learns about topology.

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444 views Sep 1, 2018

2 Minute Rants with Patrick Tomlinson #5: Kavanaugh/KavaNah

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2,016 views Sep 6, 2018
Author and comic Patrick S. Tomlinson discusses developments in the Kavanaugh confirmation process.

2 Minute Drills with Patrick, #6: Dr. Ford Probe

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794 views Sep 27, 2018
Patrick S. Tomlinson zooms out on the Kavanaugh nomination to investigate how we got here

2 Minute Drills with Patrick Tomlinson, #7: American Soft Power Died with Khashoggi.

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1,431 views Oct 22, 2018
Author and pundit Patrick S. Tomlinson talks about the assassination of Jamal Khashoggi and the deliberate dismantling of America's diplomatic power.

Traditional ramen breakfast tea.

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1,847 views Oct 28, 2018
This was a bad idea.

2 Minute Drill with Patrick Tomlinson #8: Hot Tub Time Machines and the Next Attorney General

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3,026 views Nov 20, 2018
Author and pundit Patrick S. Tomlinson discusses the state of the race to replace Jeff Sessions as Attorney General.

 

[AnOminous]

Look how fat and greasy this repulsive pig is. Look at how disgusting he is. He doesn't even look human.

 

[Procrastinhater]

View attachment 5320822
Look how fat and greasy this repulsive pig is. Look at how disgusting he is. He doesn't even look human.

He's got like this permanent sheen over his skin, like he's made from Corned Beef.

 

[Tiny Chinaman]

View attachment 5320822
Look how fat and greasy this repulsive pig is. Look at how disgusting he is. He doesn't even look human.

Fatrick should be forced to pay off his debt by pulling a plow for a year or so

 

[Lord Xenu]

You just look at this dude in any picture and think "wow, this man sucks dicks."

I hadn't watched much video of him before today, but even the way he gestures and moves telegraphs gay boy. Look at the way he waves in all these videos. Its like an instagram model, or a small child, would move. Maybe, a straight adult male would wave at a kid like this, but not at another grown man ie; his target demo.

 

[AnOminous]

I hadn't watched much video of him before today, but even the way he gestures and moves telegraphs gay boy. Look at the way he waves in all these videos. Its like an instagram model, or a small child, would move. Maybe, a straight adult male would wave at a kid like this, but not at another grown man ie; his target demo.

He is a pathetic homosexual. He sucks dicks.