🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[Lorne Armstrong]

He ought to donate 10% of the proceeds from book sales to the Wounded Warrior Project.

 

[Nobusuke Kishi]

oh he's going to release a book ?
View attachment 5325219
https://ghostarchive.org/archive/Mg7eV

If Anthony Cumia's book, about being one of the most famous radio hosts in America with one of the most public downfalls in the business, didn't sell well, why would Ralph think his ramblings about Gamergate and gossip about z-list internet celebrities push any sales?

 

[popnloch ness monster]

it's all so he could say he's written more books than he's read

 

[Dona Morte]

So when are you coming back to AF Ralph?

 

[Cucktry Roads]

Warski and PPP are lazy, I fully expected a 2-3 week break from them instead of streaming from the kitchen on phones. This is a nothingburger.

 

[Victim2988]

Also go into extensive details of your enemies and all of their transgressions and talk about a bunch of nonsense internet drama only like 30 of your payouts care about.

The book idea is silly and Ralph is too lazy and uneducated to actually write something of value.
Buuut, I believe that a biopic about Ralph rising up after jail and falling down in Flames again in a storm if booze, pills, revenge porn, baby mamas leaving him and mexican rage fits would be something to watch for. A really, really dark comedy about addiction, human idiocy, fake political stances, with burlesque moments (like the bowling event, Portugal 1 &2, the rants, his Alliance with the gay pedos bunch). And really sad and depressing moments, the lonely death of his mother, his retarded brother abandoned in a home, a dirty baby rozy crying on the floor while he's threatening to kill the horse...).
Yeah more than enough to make the first really good movie about youtube and streaming, the grifters of the alt-right, the pseudo-internet fame of internet niches.
But Hollywood is a nest of Jews, gay Marxists and globalists so they would totally trash the original concept to make it to an anti-trump superwoke piece of garbage to show how bad white people are, so there's nothing to hope for. Just look at what they did with the burzum/mayhem/vikernes/euronymous story a few years ago.
But if that good and original movie would exist in a parallel dimension, I think the best title for it would be :
"BISH".

 

[Booby Jones]

If Anthony Cumia's book, about being one of the most famous radio hosts in America with one of the most public downfalls in the business, didn't sell well, why would Ralph think his ramblings about Gamergate and gossip about z-list internet celebrities push any sales?

Cumia had a ghostwriter.
This will be all the literary genius of Reethan Ralph, alog. Do YEW UNNERSTAN?

 

[Mr E. Grifter]

Ralph is a little known, but highly esteemed scholar of the political realities of the ante-bellum United States.

It wasn't slavery, it was those damn Yankee bishes keepin' the white man down!

I'm not going to start history sperging, but fuck me is this nigga retarded.

 

[el bandito loco]

The book idea is silly and Ralph is too lazy and uneducated to actually write something of value.
Buuut, I believe that a biopic about Ralph rising up after jail and falling down in Flames again in a storm if booze, pills, revenge porn, baby mamas leaving him and mexican rage fits would be something to watch for. A really, really dark comedy about addiction, human idiocy, fake political stances, with burlesque moments (like the bowling event, Portugal 1 &2, the rants, his Alliance with the gay pedos bunch). And really sad and depressing moments, the lonely death of his mother, his retarded brother abandoned in a home, a dirty baby rozy crying on the floor while he's threatening to kill the horse...).
Yeah more than enough to make the first really good movie about youtube and streaming, the grifters of the alt-right, the pseudo-internet fame of internet niches.
But Hollywood is a nest of Jews, gay Marxists and globalists so they would totally trash the original concept to make it to an anti-trump superwoke piece of garbage to show how bad white people are, so there's nothing to hope for. Just look at what they did with the burzum/mayhem/vikernes/euronymous story a few years ago.
But if that good and original movie would exist in a parallel dimension, I think the best title for it would be :
"BISH".

I'd watch this, I want a 12ish episode mini series starring Danny McBride

 

[Mr. Manchester]

Ralph... the wagie cagie isn't so bad. I would love to see you greet me at Walmart and I would be glad to show you my receipt upon leaving with something you can't afford. The Walmart family will always accept you no matter how retarded you act.

Their open arms await...

 

[Mr E. Grifter]

Why was Hitler bad?
Was it the aggressive invasions of neighbouring countries?
Was it the oppressive regime?
Was it the mass industrialised murder of minorities and the disabled?

No, according to Ralph, Hitler was bad because he failed and thus helped the Jews.

But it's okay guys, if you disavow Hitler it's good optics - even if the reason you seem to disavow him is that he didn't win.

 

[Weeb Slinger]

oh he's going to release a book ?
View attachment 5325219
https://ghostarchive.org/archive/Mg7eV

The Odyssey of Ethan Oliver Ralph​

Chapter the First: An all star in the manger


How does a man who is born into simple means, and unafforded luxuries such as on-brand Transformer toys, and the G.I. JOE U.S.S. FLAGG Aircraft Carrier, that you, the reader, might take for granted, rise from his humble background, to a life of five star days everyday?

The answer to that question is that he begins by following a star.

The star in question was the glint in pawpaw's ring. He had won it at a carnival, ironically in a game of ring toss. The moment I laid eyes on it, I intuitively surmised that it was at least 24 carats and worth somewhere in the ballpark of $80,000. I knew in my heart that, if I were to follow that twinkle of precious metal as it caught the light of the exposed bulb dangling over my shoebox crib, it would lead me to a success so profound that I would one-day be able to buy the ring from my father. From that day on, my guiding star would no longer reside in the heavens above me, leading the way. Instead I would carry it by my side on my finger. I would see it whenever I raised a burger, or a slice of pizza, to my lips, telling me: 'You are on the right path.'

Of course there were times in my childhood when I saw that glint of light coming at me at a greater speed than I would have liked, as if it was a meteor streaking across the heavens towards me. On those occasions I had the common sense to get out of its path before it made a crater.

It is interesting to note that the fathers of my baby mamas, from whom I am mercifully estranged, claim to be well-off, and yet neither one, to my knowledge, has ever owned a ring even remotely like my pawpaw's. I am going to let the matter lie now, but I thought that it was worth bringing up.

Another formative moment in my life was the first time I saw a bouncy castle. It loomed over the fence of a neighbours yard, the towers swaying back and forth with the motion of the children who were jumping up and down on it. Naturally, I had not been invited to this social gathering. Wouldn't it be great, I thought, to have your own bouncy castle that you carried around with you, like a snail shell. When you weren't using it, it could hang down from your belly as a bifurcated fold of loose flesh...

 

[Scout Trooper]

He ought to donate 10% of the proceeds from book sales to the Wounded Warrior Project.

What about St. Joodes?

Another formative moment in my life was the first time I saw a bouncy castle. It loomed over the fence of a neighbours yard, the towers swaying back and forth with the motion of the children who were jumping up and down on it. Naturally, I had not been invited to this social gathering. Wouldn't it be great, I thought, to have your own bouncy castle that you carried around with you, like a snail shell. When you weren't using it, it could hang down from your belly as a bifurcated fold of loose flesh...

Holy shit, this is brilliant.

No, according to Ralph, Hitler was bad because he failed and thus helped the Jews.

Is this little moron fucking serious?

 

[Mr E. Grifter]

Is this little moron fucking serious?

Yes, but he also doesn't read anything. Everything he thinks is based on whatever preconceived nonsense the other fringe right spastics he associates with have fed him over the years.

Take his Civil War post - even if the Civil War being due to Slavery was a lie (it's not) why would that lie agitate black people, visa vi the fact that slavery happened at all which he isn't disputing?

 

[bile demon]

terrible writer, an incompetent storyteller, and has no audience. No one is going to publish his ramblings because about twenty people would buy it.

Today I will remind them...

Spoiler

 

[Lorne Armstrong]

What about St. Joodes?

He could try, but St Joodes would probably refuse his donation once they found out about his revenge porn conviction.

 

[Look--an Alien!]

I mean, he wrote 6,000 words, that's basically a book already!

He can probably write 10,000 words on his love of purses, that should pad it out...and another 10,000 words that only include FUCK, YOUUUU, BISH, DO, UNNNERSTAND, etc

 

[AncientPhosphur]

6,000 words? Probably only 200 words of actual substance at best and is mostly inane rambling with a lot of “well you know how that goes” or creative descriptions that are really Ralph telling you to look it up or google it. He’s writing is 8th grade tier at best. I look forward to his lack of proof reading and going over things he already stated multiple times because he blacked out while writing. Ralph if you want to write better just ask chatGPT to write about gamergate. Here’s an example for you:

Spoiler

Ethan Ralph, a name that still lingers like the acrid stench of a smoky barroom brawl, found himself thrust into the twisted circus of GamerGate, a saga that reeked of testosterone, paranoia, and digital warfare. Ralph, a self-styled provocateur, stumbled into the chaos like a drunken pirate searching for buried treasure in the treacherous waters of the internet.

In the wild, anarchic realm of GamerGate, where the line between journalist and activist blurred into oblivion, Ralph stood as a symbol of the unpredictable and the absurd. He embraced the chaos, his wild, unfiltered livestreams reminiscent of a mescaline-fueled trip through the looking glass. His vocal support for the controversial movement, often delivered with a raucous swagger, made him both a hero and a pariah among its followers.

Like a deranged war correspondent reporting from the front lines, Ralph reveled in the digital bloodbath. He wore his defiance like a badge of honor, taunting his opponents with the kind of manic glee that would have made Hunter S. Thompson proud. His livestreams became frenzied spectacles, equal parts journalism and theater, as he dissected the latest developments with a cocktail of sarcasm and vitriol.

But beneath the surface, Ralph's role in GamerGate was a complex cocktail of ambition and opportunism. He thrived on controversy, transforming his online persona into a carnival barker for a movement fueled by anger and frustration. In this surreal carnival, the lines between fact and fiction blurred, and Ralph reveled in the chaos.

GamerGate, with its swirling maelstrom of harassment campaigns, ideological clashes, and murky motivations, was a dark chapter in the annals of internet culture. And Ethan Ralph, with his bombastic style and penchant for pushing the boundaries of acceptable discourse, was a character perfectly suited to this twisted narrative.

In the end, GamerGate left a trail of destruction and division in its wake, and Ethan Ralph, like a digital rogue, moved on to new battles, leaving behind a legacy of controversy and chaos in a world where the boundaries between reality and the virtual had grown dangerously thin.

 

[HeyU]

y’all. https://twitter.com/theralphretort/status/1700559270025081311?s=46&t=f_bK0lfZfLcc9bOyG4BfgQ

tweet is too long to screenshot, so I’ll copy and paste (the part highlighted in bold is what stands out and particularly disgusts to me)

A young, innocent, 17-year-old Amanda Morris...my wife...was chatted up by a Turkish gentleman at the local mall in Greece, NY. After some light flirting, he proposed they go out on a date, which she, eventually and reluctantly, agreed to.

"Hey," she thought, talking herself into it, "it's just a date, right? I'm 17 and about to be an adult. I should get used to doing these sorts of things. Let's try it!"

When it came time to go on the date, she was picked up by him at her father Harry Morris's home. Instead of taking her to the agreed upon location, he pulled into a hotel parking lot. He asked Amanda to come inside of his hotel room for a minute while he finished getting ready.

I think most of you will be able to easily predict what happened next, at least to some degree.

Instead of a date, Amanda was forcibly sodomized...anally raped...by this evil cretin in a treacherous and barbarous attack against a virginal girl.

When she was discarded and dropped off by the rapist, she called her mother, Jolene Vitto. She confessed what happened and told her that she had been anally raped. They went to the local hospital in order for a "rape kit" to be performed. If you didn't know, the performance of a rape kit is necessary in order to gather enough evidence...hopefully even DNA evidence...to prove the guilt of a rapist.

Allegedly frustrated at the amount of time it was taking, Jolene complained to the hospital staff about the procedure and took her confused and distressed daughter home instead. A rape kit was never performed, and the rapist was never brought to justice. We will never know how many other young, innocent 17-year-old girls met the same fate as Amanda did that day as a result of the cruelty and cowardice of her own mother Jolene.

I will swear to God on a stack of Bibles, the life of my deceased and beloved Mother, Sandra Ralph, and the life of my daughter, Rozanna Sandra RALPH, that this story was told to me multiple times by Amanda Morris. It is so heinous that not even I could have conjured it for you here today.

So, ask yourselves. If I am a monster based of an out-of-context two minute and fifty-three second audio clip...where I was secretly recorded after a long night of mixing alcohol and alprazolam, clearly out of my mind....what, then, is Jolene Vitto?

I'll tell you what she is. She is a cold, wicked, vile, vicious, nasty woman, as Mr. Trump would say. She is even worse than a monster, because she hides and tries to portray herself as one of the "good people."

Well, Jolene, I have some bad news for you. You're not one of the "good people." You're one of the lowest, sickest, and dirtiest meatbags I have ever had the displeasure of coming across.

I post this so that my daughter will one day know just who the Morris family, specifically Jolene and Harry, really are.

You wanted the truth? There's your truth. Do your worst and leak whatever you will on me because I no longer care about this mortal coil or the fate of my life before I finally shuffle off it. I will have nothing else to write or say about Amanda, Jolene, or Harry as long as I live. If, for whatever reason, I must refer or allude to Amanda, also known as May, because of our work together on the Killstream, I will never again use her name. She is no longer recognizable to me anyway.

Still, I hope that she is happy and blessed during the duration of her days. Even now, even after everything that has been said and done, I still love her deeply. I think I always will. Thank you for getting me through the death of my mother and for being there for me unceasingly during that time. I would not be here today were it not for the amazing woman I once knew back then. My mother loved you as well and you know that. That's why you named our daughter after her. I thank you for being there during the hardest part of her life, the prolonged and tragic end of it, on her behalf. We met a little over three years ago. I do not regret the time we spent together. I cherish it. There is a time and reason for every season, though. That season has come to its end. Fall has come and May is long gone.

However, I will pray that God, my mother Sandra, who I miss so much, and especially my daughter Rozanna Ralph, one day understand why I told you this here today. I ask for forgiveness from them both.

 

[Bland Crumbs]

tweet is too long to screenshot, so I’ll copy and paste (the part highlighted in bold is what stands out and particularly disgusts to me)

The whole thing disgusts me because he is trying to flex his writing muscles to attack people and expose things that allegedly happened to Meigh. Of course since Ralph does not have writing muscles it is awful, ineffective, and riddled with basic errors.

If I picked through the entire thing this post would be three times as long as Ralph's pathetic passage.

Moving on, I notice Ralph uses Rozy's full name which includes his last name. Being that Ralph is not a smart or subtle man I have to think they are threatening to change her last name to Morris.

I will swear to God on a stack of Bibles, the life of my deceased and beloved Mother, Sandra Ralph

Swearing on a bible is really only important if you actually believe in God. You do not.
Also we all know you did not love your mother Ralph. You told her to get an Uber to dialysis on a hot day.

I am not sure why he thought it was a good idea to put this out into the world but it will most assuredly cause him problems. It certainly gave me a fucking migraine as I hit error after error.

I have to sorry I have to:
When you use numbers in text you use the word unless the number is 100 or greater.

So seventeen is written out while 100 is not.

When you represent someone's inner monologue in a written work you do not write it as dialogue. At the most you would italicize the thoughts.

These are basic writing concepts, Ethan. Holy shit buy a fucking book.

Like I know this is a Xieet or whatever but Ralph represents himself as the greatest writer of our time so he could at least attempt basic fucking English.