Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Falcon Sebben]

No, the crematorium should have turned them away. "You must fit under this weight to ride the ride" type shit. It's not the family's fault that the people operating the crematorium didn't know its limitations.

Yeah but it's funnier that way.

 

[Blobby's Murder Knife]

Yeah but it's funnier that way.

I thought they learned and what happens is they dismember the bodies and burn them separate at additional cost.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

I thought they learned and what happens is they dismember the bodies and burn them separate at additional cost.

Okay that way is funnier.

 

[Pig Cups]

No, the crematorium should have turned them away. "You must fit under this weight to ride the ride" type shit. It's not the family's fault that the people operating the crematorium didn't know its limitations.

Then they sullenly drive away from the crematory with Jack's corpse tied to the top of the car, like Aunt Edna in National Lampoon's Vacation (1983).

Well, you know how they got rid of that beached whale...

They may just resort to that out of desperation, assuming they hit a brick wall with interment/cremation options.


They don't even have to use dynamite (or better, tannerite). Like with the whale, they can lazily move Jack's carcass to an isolated stretch of beach, and let the gaseous build-up from the decomp do the dirty work for them- a fitting way to honor the Lazy Man's memory.

Personally, I believe that the most suitable and deserved approach would be to unceremoniously bury Jack at a landfill.

 

[beepbopisuckcock]

You're all wrong. Tammy and Jr will reenact the final scene from the 1993 film What's Eating Gilbert Grape?, which features a young Johnny Depp and Leo DiCaprio.

​

 

[Delilah Radio Show]

Still seething about Joe Chavez, lol.

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

There are more fitting alternatives to cremation.

Shit, just bag him up and put him out on the curb.

 

[Aunt Carol]

I watched Jack's recent live where he said "someone" is sending him a free generator. I think I know what's going on here. I have a friend who got a "free" generator. Their kid has muscular dystrophy and sleeps with a breathing machine and has an electric wheelchair. The insurance paid for it as their medical equipment requires it.

Around here the power company provides you with an emergency backup battery/power station if you need powered devices to live, not a generator. I'm not sure Jack would qualify, if he's just on CPAP, but of course that will vary by jurisdiction. This sounds more like Jack just buying things and claiming they were free.

They say you have to burn the heart to completely kill off a Wendigo and destroy the evil spirits so they don't take over another person. I just hope Tammy and the towns local PD know this.

Can you use a smoker; this is important

I thought they learned and what happens is they dismember the bodies and burn them separate at additional cost.

I can't tell if we're joking anymore, but how they cremate obese people is to do them first in the morning, when the crematorium oven isn't warmed up yet.

If you buy one of the cheap cremation packages, the ones they advertise in the newspaper across from the obits, the asterisk is in the ad because you can add on a day of cold storage or a nicer urn, and also because there's an additional fee for people over X weight. It's 300lb at the crematorium I interact with most, but it varies by crematorium (physics as well as policy). I have never had them turn someone down but IIRC the largest person I've had picked up was around 550lb/250kg. This was at night, though; there might have been a flurry of phone calls in the morning.

 

[beepbopisuckcock]

how they cremate obese people is to do them first in the morning, when the crematorium oven isn't warmed up yet

What's the reasoning there? The fat renders out slower and is less likely to flare up?

 

[Aunt Carol]

What's the reasoning there? The fat renders out slower and is less likely to flare up?

That's my understanding, yeah, but I only know that from secondary sources, not first-hand.



Looking into the possibility of Jack getting a free generator from the power company.

City of Henderson TN lists two power companies serving the area: Cumberland Electric Membership Corporation and Nashville Electric Service.

CEMC has hardship fee waivers for life-sustaining medical equipment, but nothing in place for power loss, just prioritization.

https://www.cemc.org/help-center/outage/

Unfortunately, CEMC cannot guarantee power 24/7. However, if you have a medical necessity that requires electricity 24/7 we’d like to know so we can flag your account. Call us at 800-987-2362 or use the Live Chat below (7:30 a.m. – 4:30 p.m.) to discuss your account. Remember, if your life depends on electricity, be sure to have an emergency back-up plan in place in case of an outage.

NES is similar; requiring uninterrupted power for life-sustaining equipment just prioritizes your service, and gives 30 extra days with the electrical account on a limiter before cutoff for nonpayment.

https://www.nespower.com/life-support/

Life support customers are given priority status during individual outages; during a widespread outage, repairs to the system must be made before individual outages can be addressed. Severe storms can cause significant damage that could take days to repair. It is important to have a back-up plan in place for extended outages.

https://nespowernews.com/storm-alert-prepare-for-severe-weather-2/

Have a back-up plan for life-support equipment.
If you or a family member rely on an electrical life-sustaining medical device, identify a location with emergency power capabilities and make plans to go there or to a hospital during an extended outage.

In conclusion, these two Tennessee electrical companies don't give out freebies. Thank you.

 

[Andoxico]

I just realized today is this thread's 8th year anniversary! Figured I'd get a couple screenshots to see how the years have treated Mr. Scalfatty

Spoiler: 2015

pulporks chili

Spoiler: 2023

stroke #?? recovery

 

[8mm Cunningham]

In conclusion, these two Tennessee electrical companies don't give out freebies. Thank you.

No argument here, typically it is the health insurance companies who pay out for them.

 

[Exist0]

View attachment 5419325
Still seething about Joe Chavez, lol.

Well shit, my first time MATI. I could express my anger in detail, but @AnOminous has pretty much covered all the bases. Fuck this fat fucking faggot.

 

[Reynolds]

I just realized today is this thread's 8th year anniversary! Figured I'd get a couple screenshots to see how the years have treated Mr. Scalfatty

Spoiler: 2015

pulporks chili
View attachment 5420240

Spoiler: 2023

stroke #?? recovery
View attachment 5420241

Insane how he aged 30 years in 8

 

[Aunt Carol]

No argument here, typically it is the health insurance companies who pay out for them.

Would Jack have gone through a prior auth saga without whining about it or vagueposting with Bitmoji?

 

[8mm Cunningham]

Would Jack have gone through a prior auth saga without whining about it or vagueposting with Bitmoji?

If I had to guess, I think Tammy-mommy would have done the legwork for him. Hell, he might not even know!

"Jack, we are getting a free generator so you can run your smokers and CPAP when the power goes out"

"Gud!"

 

[densedance]

View attachment 5419325
Still seething about Joe Chavez, lol.

Curious if Jack even knows that Joe write comments under some Jack Compilation videos that he regreted everything that he did together with Jack.

 

[MS Paint Gigachad]

Personally, I believe that the most suitable and deserved approach would be to unceremoniously bury Jack at a landfill.

 

[Suburban Bastard]

I just realized today is this thread's 8th year anniversary! Figured I'd get a couple screenshots to see how the years have treated Mr. Scalfatty

Spoiler: 2015

pulporks chili
View attachment 5420240

Spoiler: 2023

stroke #?? recovery
View attachment 5420241

Guys, I’m starting to think he’s not following Keto correctly.

 

[SNEED.EXE]

good to be back foodjacks!

It took me a couple seconds to realize he wasn't shaped like this.