Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

When will Jack drop dead?

  • February-March 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • April-May 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • June-July 2024

    Votes: 18 1.3%
  • August-September 2024

    Votes: 34 2.4%
  • October-November 2024

    Votes: 37 2.7%
  • December 2024

    Votes: 44 3.2%
  • Sometime in 2025

    Votes: 258 18.5%
  • Sometime in 2026

    Votes: 198 14.2%
  • Jack lives forever. The Wendigo Must Consoom

    Votes: 794 56.9%

  • Total voters
    1,395
Does Jack think that an airline would rather not have their flights booked to capacity? Or is it that his obese son and daughter in law have to touch arms because of how fat they both are?
It's pretty awesome though when you get on a connecting flight to a smaller airport and there's like 10 or so people on the flight.
 
I remember when I was in the 3rd Grade and our elderly teacher insisted that nobody would take us seriously in the future if we couldn't write cursive lol.

She was definitely wrong about that and I don't remember how to properly write it anymore, but at least it comes in handy for reading stuff other people can't.
 
It's pretty awesome though when you get on a connecting flight to a smaller airport and there's like 10 or so people on the flight.
That's what it was like when I used to go to Aberdeen, SD for work. Other than the time around pheasant season it was like flying on a private jet.
 
Funny thing is that before he starts the actual cooking, he makes some good points and good ideas. But once the cooking start it goes to hell fast
Isn't that more of an (un) baked ziti than a lasagna? I know its an old vid but I associate lasagnas with layering pasta and cheese and sauce etc... there's a lot of room for variation in a lasagna, but this would make Garfield upset.
Well there's your problem: 96.445 fucking gallons of gas at ~$5.60!
I wish this wasn't so horrific like the cooking videos, but alas. Meat and gasoline.

quick edit: my shitbox car holds about 17 gallons, and I'm able to drive a reasonable (American) distance (almost a whole Bulgaria (North to South) for my eurofriends)
I got a car with about a 17 gallon capacity, and spouse's car has 20 gallons. You only see tanks like these on heavy-duty pickups, giant trucks, etc. That, or Jack needed to fill 19 5-gallon jerry cans of gas for his upcoming pyre cremation.
Wtf he has real lemons, why is he using the lazy lemon juice? Does he lose lazyman rep points if he juices the already-zested lemon?
I think it's funny because Jack likely CAN'T write.
Just like you can't take the low road while mocking Jack. He did it all to himself.
Also funny he's talking about hieroglyphics [OBJ] [OBJ]
He can't stir a bowl to combine, no way he can write more than a weak attempt at a signature.
that's typical per litre most places.

Besides, what car has a 96 gallon tank?
Eurofag detected. We don't buy gas in "litres", son. >:(
One reason a school might teach handwriting is an important one, and it's sadly one that's been harder to teach these days:
Fine motor skills.

Smartphones and tablets have actually impacted kids, and delayed fine motor skills. Teaching kids to pick up a pencil and write small, intricate shapes is a good way to gain some of those skills.
It's also a primary cause of illiteracy in China. Kids can't handwrite characters because they're used to T4 pinyin prediction to do the work for them.
I'll be the first to admit I don't write cursive but that's because my handwriting is terrible.
I write in a mongrel pidgin printing with limited cursive elements. It was adapted for the lab so I wouldn't confuse t's for +'s, or l for 1, O for 0, etc.
I remember filling out entire pages of notes in high school, only to never use them, either on a test or for revision. I was always angry when I threw them in the trash when the semester ended. (Our teachers were sticklers about this. If you abridged notes or took simple summaries, you were marked down.)
I went to a school where we were graded on our artwork quality, and I kept getting marked down for being "too anime".
 
View attachment 5436516

This fat fuck will complain about everything. He is sitting at the very front where his gimp ass has extra leg gut room. He really just has to play up everything to paint himself the victim.
Also, hard doubt he's actually got anyone next to him. Southwest has an extremely generous policy for deathfats, where they give you the middle seat empty for free AND let you preboard AND take a minder with you (Tambo) and undoubtedly Jack got preboarding anyway because he likely showed up in a wheelchair. The giant dying faggot just loves to complain.

But if he didn't know about the lardo policy, he's as stupid as I think he is.

Actually I just realized why he's actually pissed. The front row has its tray tables built into the armrests, which means they can't be raised. So he was idiotic enough to take the very front row which meant he had to cram his boulder shape into an unmovable cube, and all that legroom is wasted on a stubby manlet like Jack. He can't complain about THAT without admitting to be a gigantic wad of adipose tissue so he has to pretend there are TWO other people in a three seat row, GASP.
 
Last edited:
iirc jack mentioned being left handed in one of his knife testing videos, but i always assumed that was a lie that jack thought would make him "quirky." he always seemed to prefer his right hand before he lost the use of it, and now he can't use his remaining hand to do relatively simple tasks. then again, he always had the coordination of a drunk retard.
And yet in every video where we see him chopping stuff it was always with his right hand. Yeah it looked like the veggies and whatever were cut by a drunken monkey but I always assumed it was because he was a retard and he was being lazy about it. In his attempt at making phở he said you needed to cut the meat thinly and he starts fairly decently but then because it takes too much time he just starts cutting larger pieces.


View attachment 5436516

This fat fuck will complain about everything. He is sitting at the very front where his gimp ass has extra leg gut room. He really just has to play up everything to paint himself the victim.
The only reason he says this is because normally he needs to buy two seats because he and Hammy are so wide but in this case it looks like they're only two seats per row so he feels crowded. Just look behind him where Jr and Jr are sitting. Look how much they're oozing over into each other's space. These Scalfattys are just fat.

It's also a primary cause of illiteracy in China. Kids can't handwrite characters because they're used to T4 pinyin prediction to do the work for them.
It's the same here but that's spelling. Kids, and a lot of adults, don't know the difference between there, their and they're. Why? They don't read and pay attention to how words are written. And they rely too much on spellcheck. It's possible to write something, have it be spelled correctly and it's still wrong because you used the wrong words. As the old saying goes, "theirs know too weighs about it".

And as far as Chinese goes? It's a fucked up language to begin with.

They were doing you a favour. Look at the weaboos now, and see what you might have been.
Animu and mango were a mistake. They've infiltrated society so much that too many people adopt that style when drawing.
 
As much as I like seeing Jack called out by someone with actual training, no good chef is going to be wasting time on YouTube with lolcows.
At first I was going to disagree. Yes, being a chef is a strenuous and time-consuming gig (depending on where you are in terms of seniority), but hey, who says you can't have interests/hobbies outside of it? Even if that hobby involves making videos of cooking lolcows? Seems like it'd be a natural fit, considering how culinarily-inclined you are already.

But then I saw this. Oof:
Screenshot 2023-10-23 at 1.28.02 PM.png
"OMG you guiyz! I'm gonna be making a video where I react to Uncle Roger, who is himself reviewing a recipe from a totally different creator (Vincenzo's Plate)! This is a threesome sure to bring trouble, and things are gonna get real HEATED. Plz like+ suscribe!!"

It honestly reminds me of this:
92swc0zhgz511.jpg

Again, there's nothing wrong with a hobby. To be fair, Makinson has a lot of videos that focus on different topics/personalities. He makes his own recipe videos, in addition to videos reviewing recipes from Jamie Oliver, Weissman, Epicurious, etc. But the reaction content...jesus fucking christ is it cringe-inducing. Makinson has a massive hard-on for Uncle Roger, and makes videos of himself reacting to Uncle Roger's *reactions.*

Gives me the sense that he's truly not passionate in his career as a chef. It's a way to pay the bills, and he's proficient at it, sure. But I could see Makinson being one of those guys whose true dream is to be an improv comic or full-time content creator. Wouldn't shock me if he hits open-mic nights after work.

And the soy faces that he uses in a lot of his thumbnails are just infuriating.
Screenshot 2023-10-23 at 1.35.36 PM.png
 
unmovable cube
Oh, that is just lovely. I'm imagining him sitting in between the cattle bars, futilely trying to raise them. One size fits all, fatty, and your size is WRONG!

It's nice that Jack is contemplating death. I heard that In-n-Out is expanding to Tennessee in 2026, and wondered if Jack will even be alive then. I'm imagining corpse jack seething that he can't get his durble durble in his coffin.

Once again, Makinson doesn't appear to enjoy ANYTHING.
 
Jack throwing a fit over that doof Newsom wanting kids to be able to write is pretty funny. While yes we do usually type nowadays, there are specific things that being able to write with actually is important due to just being more trivial to do than boot up a device. Some examples where getting a notepad and scribbling is useful include note taking on the spot, writing out lists to aid in memory for shopping, or signing names.

Not surprised Jack is pissy that others can do something he intentionally made himself unable to due to his refusal to change diet OR do the PT.
View attachment 5433902

If Newsom is for it, Jack is against it. It's as simple as that. If Newsom spoke out against fake meat, Jack would buy an year's supply with Tammy's credit card.
I disagree with this one's take on cursive being critical, since it really is only useful as a marginal anti-fraud measure now honestly for identification. She is right though in that writing does aid in fine motor skills for kids, similar to why we push so many art activities on them as well. Well that and arting is fun.

Again, Newsom's a doof, but this is a W IMO for him.
iirc jack mentioned being left handed in one of his knife testing videos, but i always assumed that was a lie that jack thought would make him "quirky." he always seemed to prefer his right hand before he lost the use of it, and now he can't use his remaining hand to do relatively simple tasks. then again, he always had the coordination of a drunk retard.
No way in hell was Jack ever left-handed. He clearly was right hand dominant before he lost use of that arm, given how much he used it for. You naturally prefer the hand you're dominant with because it feels the most natural and it's usually the one that allows you the finest motor skills. Jack has used his right hand in every example you can list.

If he's calling himself a lefty now, it's purely because the stroke forced him to become one.
 
Jack throwing a fit over that doof Newsom wanting kids to be able to write is pretty funny. While yes we do usually type nowadays, there are specific things that being able to write with actually is important due to just being more trivial to do than boot up a device. Some examples where getting a notepad and scribbling is useful include note taking on the spot, writing out lists to aid in memory for shopping, or signing names.
This. Like when you have to give a signature for a house and write you name and date on the loan paperwork, you can't just use something like DocuSign to do it. The bank requires an actual wet signature to prove you know what you're getting into. Jack, on the other hand, will never get that far.
 
This. Like when you have to give a signature for a house and write you name and date on the loan paperwork, you can't just use something like DocuSign to do it. The bank requires an actual wet signature to prove you know what you're getting into. Jack, on the other hand, will never get that far.
But he has wet brain tho!
 
Does Jack think that an airline would rather not have their flights booked to capacity? Or is it that his obese son and daughter in law have to touch arms because of how fat they both are?

Yeah, it really highlights their size when you see the two people sitting in the same seats as Brianna and Jack Jr a few rows back and they don't look uncomfortably squished together at all, despite neither of those people appearing to be particularly petite. It just makes it clear the seats aren't unreasonably cramped, they're both just too fat.
 
View attachment 5436516

This fat fuck will complain about everything. He is sitting at the very front where his gimp ass has extra leg gut room. He really just has to play up everything to paint himself the victim.
Jack's new pfp with the Israeli flag in it lol. Bet he's ecstatic at the fact his fantasy about firebombing Palestinians is coming true.
 
And as far as Chinese goes? It's a fucked up language to begin with.
OOh! OOh! As someone who's powerleveled about studying chinese before, let me drop some anecdotes:
1. How do you pronounce "行", and what does it mean?
These are a few that come off the top of my head (n.b. I can't type in Phonetic notation):
-hang meaning a row. Also used in the chinese word for bank
-xing, meaning "ok" or to travel
-heng meaning skill
While this might be the most atrocious example I can think of, there are many other cases:
wikipedia said:
In Standard Chinese, one-fifth of the 2,400 most common characters have multiple possible pronunciations
2. "Lion eating poet in the stone den"
It's a story, consisting of about 90 chinese words, all pronounced some variation of "shi"
Re, jack's handwriting autism: I feel that cursive isnt important, but handwriting is. If you can write, you can type, whether it be in english or chinese. But if you can type, you arent necessarily able to write, especially if using a spellchecker or in chinese (Especially in chinese, as confirmed by me and some of my classmates). That being said, i feel that the policy he's railing against kinda speaks to lowered standards or developmental delays? By the time I was in elementary school I could already write somewhat competently.

PS:
jack is fat - Copy.jpg
 
Last edited:
Maybe we have come to the Mandela effect of Jack Scalfani because I also recall him saying he was left handed.

Jack is such a whiny bitch. What won't he whine and complain about? When I logged into the forum today, his thread was bumped so I noticed it on the front page. Had a flashback of his thread being featured, post 2nd stroke (I think?) And how Jack probably isn't that far off from going off into the pasture.

I propose a new poll since fatty has a death rattle cough, is barely coherent and is apparently speed running to the grave with his food choices. If 4 strokes can't take the man down, what finally will?

Thread tax:
20231024_004919.jpg
 
View attachment 5431109

Looks like the results of a game of soggy biscuit. Jesus H.
Sorry to powerlevel here, but I hate overly sugary foods. Sugar cookies, no. Store brand cake? Fuck no. Cinnamon rolls, hell no. That picture makes me sick looking at it. I'm not being overdramatic, I literally mean I can feel my stomach churning just imagining how it would feel eating that.
 
Back