Careercow Gunther Fehlinger - Platonic Ideal of a Eurocrat made flesh. Future Furher of the NATO-Reich.

[AeroGavin Rossdale]

At first glance, Gunther's diverse policy positions might seem a bit schizophrenic. They really aren't. The guy is consistent, his views just seem a bit out of place in today's world.

His interview with the college communists on Friday exemplifies this. They really thought he would be open to Marxism because they have no frame of reference for a Cold Warrior in this day and age. They don't even really push back when he said NATO and the US have done more for anti-imperialism and prosperity than any Socialist, likely because they've never met a no shit Regeanite.

Edit: They did say Gunther has a following of young leftists. I'll have to look into it, because if so.. lol. What world are we in where university pinkos don't know the common arguments against Ronny? How long before we can reinvent Thatcher as a girl boss liberating the poor workers from the imperialist Argies?

 

[The Grognard]

His interview with the college communists on Friday exemplifies this. They really thought he would be open to Marxism because they have no frame of reference for a Cold Warrior in this day and age. They don't even really push back when he said NATO and the US have done more for anti-imperialism and prosperity than any Socialist, likely because they've never met a no shit Regeanite.

That's one major reason why he's so fascinating. He really is a political relic of the 90's.

 

[Load Bearing Drywall]

Our boy continues to break containment with trying to solve the I/P conflict, confusing the fuck out of credulous Israelis and Arabs alike.



Everything about this is incredible, but my absolute favorite parts are Frontex running Gaza's future port and airport. An absolute banger of a tweet.

 

[Mudkipcorn]

That's one major reason why he's so fascinating. He really is a political relic of the 90's.

Maybe that's why I love him so much. At the risk of politisperging, I have nothing but warm feelings toward Gunther's politics. That's not to say I agree with them, but to me they represent a simpler time. They are absolutely naive, of course. I think Gunther knows that. Obviously he isn't actually proposing the dismantling of all these countries. Similarly, I choose to believe that he doesn't actually think that immediately integrating Ukraine/Georgia/Israel etc. into the EU is a good idea. He is an EU Expansionist and is being provocative. At the same time, he's pro-America and a classic European pro-market centrist.

Spoiler: Opinion

Personally I am very much pro-EU and believe that Austrian neutrality is stupid. Still, EU expansion since 2004 was a mistake. A mistake that came from the same naive viewpoint that Gunther lives by. This kind of thinking was understandable in 2004 but today it's just baffling. Some of the countries we let in 2004 to 20011 eventually would have earned a place in our super cool club, but looking back I don't see how anyone can believe that it wasn't premature.

His heart is in the right place and he's genuinely funny. He's a provocative activist and by posting on twitter he exposes all sorts of people in non-western countries to these ideas. They take them at face value and think he is genuinely insane. We in this thread shouldn't make the same mistake.
In that since I reiterate that he isn't a lolcow, but he is certainly the center of all sorts of drama which I definitely want to follow.

We have a diverse cast of people outside of Western Europe, residents of whatever country Gunther wants Balkanized, Eurosceptics, NAFO types, and now Western leftists baffled by what this guy really means. I love it.

Thread Tax:
New Balkanization plans dropped. Syria (not pictured) and Lebanon.


Saying what we're all thinking, some Turkish professor asks if Gunther's gone insane. We've already seen one hate calling for the dismemberment of Austria (without NATO protection, it could actually happen!), but now they're going after the man himself.



Finally, we have a vision for peace in the Middle East.
Edit: Nija'd on Fehlinger's Final Solution for Israel, but I'll keep it in case anyone prefers a text version.

Spoiler: Israel-Palestine Conflict Solution

I call for recognition of #Palestine in #Westbank borders see below
1. Gaza will be EU mandate #EuropeanGaza status open #ExHamas
2. No return of historic refugees into Israel but into Westbank Palestine
3. Israel, joins NATO upon recognition of WB Palestine
4. WestBank #Palestine will be Neutral, demilitarized
5. Israel settlers in Westbank will be Double Citizens with residence right protected by #EUMission
6. EU mission for Palestine for Rule of Law
7. OSCE elections for Palestine
8. Israel, Palestine, Gaza in EU Customs Union
9. Israel, Palestine, Gaza adopt the Euro
10. Israel, Palestine, Gaza in OSCE
11. Ramallah City will be capital of Palestine
12. Gaza gets a deep sea port managed by Frontex
13. Gaza will be EU refugee transit center for refugees
14. Palestine gets a international airport managed by Frontex at Jerusalem International Airport
15. NATO Mission for Westbank Jordan River Border to Jordan
16. International commission for settling all old claims
17. All unrepented terrorists will be transferred to Guantanamo
18. EU infrastructure aid and economic assistance
19. No welfare payment for families of terrorist
20. Joint education and history commission by OSCE
21. Jerusalem will be Israel capital and all EU Embassies move to Jerusalem and open Embassies in Ramallah
22. Internal border wall and internal security will be transfer to EU Mission
23. Significant USA and EU funding for all above
24. A Peace treaty signed by NATO and EU
25. Golan Heights will be recognised as part of Israel 26. Israel breaks with Russia and China
27. Regime change towards #ExSyria #ExLebanon #ExIsrael #ExHamas #ExPalestine #FehlingerPeacePlan for #MiddleEast

 

[AeroGavin Rossdale]

Frontex running Gaza's future port and airport

Hm, Europeans flood the Holy Land, establish ports, banks, control currency and set up schools and hospitals? I understand, Herr Fehlinger. Standing back and standing by.

Obviously he isn't actually proposing the dismantling of all these countries

He explained off twitter he considers dismantle a last resort, what he actually wants is for countries he considers authoritarian to embrace American style federalization, which he feels will eventually lead them to join the West of 1991 naturally.

Unfortunately, The Fehlinger Plan has been scuttled for now. We forgot something important. Taking the kids to the beach.

 

[General Emílio Médici]

I would back Gunther for the position of King of Jerusalem President of the International Zone of Abrahamic Holy Lands

 

[Fatniggo1488]

Our boy continues to break containment with trying to solve the I/P conflict, confusing the fuck out of credulous Israelis and Arabs alike.

View attachment 5451365

Everything about this is incredible, but my absolute favorite parts are Frontex running Gaza's future port and airport. An absolute banger of a tweet.

20. onward is really the most telling

 

[AeroGavin Rossdale]

20. onward is really the most telling

Telling of what, I see nothing out of the ordinary here. The Union of Small and Medium Crusader Enterprises with free trade between EU and the US and interest free loans to the locals will best build small business and integrate the Primar.. Israel.

 

[No. 7 cat]

I would back Gunther for the position of King of Jerusalem President of the International Zone of Abrahamic Holy Lands

Make this investment banker King of Jerusalem, so by that means the middle east would become more organized and orderly. Men there would be governed by many schedules, colored maps, and Excel sheets and not give themselves to disorderly and wasteful activities involving bombs.

 

[Mudkipcorn]

20. onward is really the most telling

My favorite is 17. All unrepented terrorists will be transferred to Guantanamo.

Though come to think of it, I'm a bit disappointed in you, Gunther. Shouldn't NATO or the EU create its own Guantanamo for dangerous elements from countries that get the Ex Treatment? We need a specific EU or NATO facility! Anyone have ideas for a good location for GuantaNATO?

I'm also curious as to Gunther's beliefs on the intersection of NATO and the EU. There are hints in his tweets and maybe he's spoken about it elsewhere but I'd like to know more what their relationship would be in his ideal world.

 

[AeroGavin Rossdale]

Anyone got the transparent template of pointing Gunther? Asking for Sunday Funday reasons.

Make this investment bank King of Jerusalem, so by that means the middle east would become more organized and orderly. Men there would be governed by many schedules, colored maps, and Excel sheets and not give themselves to disorderly and wasteful activities involving bombs.

From the river to the sea, the trade will be free.

I'm also curious as to Gunther's beliefs on the intersection of NATO and the EU. There are hints in his tweets and maybe he's spoken about it elsewhere but I'd like to know more what their relationship would be in his ideal world.

The EU would join NATO as a new entity, independent of it's constitute members. Who are also in NATO. Maybe that means something to someone, but not to me.

 

[Mudkipcorn]

The EU would join NATO as a new entity, independent of it's constitute members. Who are also in NATO. Maybe that means something to someone, but not to me.

My guess would be that the logic is that if the EU was a collective constituent of NATO, A) this would foster cohesion within the EU and B) give it more heft within the organization, essentially making it co-equal with America. Obviously this isn't exactly right as, even taken together, the EU's military is far smaller than America's. But it's clearly something Gunther wants the European nations to aspire to.

Basically it would promote/force the EU to act as one militarily and in terms of foreign policy. A symbol of EU Federalism. I don't know why countries would need to be members individually in this case, however.

 

[General Emílio Médici]

Though come to think of it, I'm a bit disappointed in you, Gunther. Shouldn't NATO or the EU create its own Guantanamo for dangerous elements from countries that get the Ex Treatment? We need a specific EU or NATO facility! Anyone have ideas for a good location for GuantaNATO?

The UK has the Faraoe Islands and the Isle Of Man which were planned to be places where delicate political prisioners and PoWs would be help in case of war with the USSR on Cold War doctrine. However the UK while still a big part of NATO has left the EU which makes Gunther the big sad so I doubt he would be ok with them getting that honor.

I thought about putting it on Svalbard, which is the most northern island of Norway and comes with in handy keeping anyone fleeing but it has a treaty that keeps it non-militarized and Gunther doesn't seem like he would wanna ruin the 100 year streak of such good international lawyering.

So I suggest Jan Mayen, which is also norwegian but has no such treaties and it is also almost deserted save for about 40 people which means you wouldn't have to bother any locals with the prison and could dedicate 100% of the island towards the DESTRUCTION OF NEUTRALITY which is nice. Just watch out for the volcano. And the birds, place is a protected sanctuary for all sorts of arctic birds. Good fishing around it I hear. Occasional bears.

 

[Skitarii]

#ExTranny
#ExMudslime

 

[AeroGavin Rossdale]

And the birds, place is a protected sanctuary for all sorts of arctic birds

That's an automatic no. Endangered birds have better lobbyists and more rights than most people. No bureaucrat is that strong, it's madness.

 

[No. 7 cat]

My guess would be that the logic is that if the EU was a collective constituent of NATO, A) this would foster cohesion within the EU and B) give it more heft within the organization, essentially making it co-equal with America. Obviously this isn't exactly right as, even taken together, the EU's military is far smaller than America's. But it's clearly something Gunther wants the European nations to aspire to.

Basically it would promote/force the EU to act as one militarily and in terms of foreign policy. A symbol of EU Federalism. I don't know why countries would need to be members individually in this case, however.

Anyone from one Donald J Trump to any number of experts and signed pledges of NATO memberscalled and call for an operable minimum of military spending. Belgium, maker of fine firearms, could at one time send paratroopers into Belgian Congo with their own resources. Now they don't even have an operable air defense system or much else military for that matter.

Make Gunther God-Emperor of Europe (no powerless EU prez or HRE) and enforce sensible strategic policy.

The UK has the Faraoe Islands and the Isle Of Man which were planned to be places where delicate political prisioners and PoWs would be help in case of war with the USSR on Cold War doctrine. However the UK while still a big part of NATO has left the EU which makes Gunther the big sad so I doubt he would be ok with them getting that honor.

I thought about putting it on Svalbard, which is the most northern island of Norway and comes with in handy keeping anyone fleeing but it has a treaty that keeps it non-militarized and Gunther doesn't seem like he would wanna ruin the 100 year streak of such good international lawyering.

So I suggest Jan Mayen, which is also norwegian but has no such treaties and it is also almost deserted save for about 40 people which means you wouldn't have to bother any locals with the prison and could dedicate 100% of the island towards the DESTRUCTION OF NEUTRALITY which is nice. Just watch out for the volcano. And the birds, place is a protected sanctuary for all sorts of arctic birds. Good fishing around it I hear. Occasional bears.

Faroe islands are Danish, so useable but thinking of Denmark, so too is Greenland. The climate there might effect a natural reduction in numbers if that'd be the site for miscreants, and as it's near the US no baddy would dare do a thing. A Georgian called Joe had that idea, at least for the former part of the idea.

 

[Load Bearing Drywall]

Someone needs to make this happen



The comments taking him 100% serious are some if my favorite things on the internet at the moment.

 

[VargReallyDidNothingWrong]

Gunther looks, erm, a little excited...
View attachment 5445497

I have never seen a photo with more pornographically intense and genuine euphoria in my life. I genuinely believe this man gets sexual pleasure from the concept of a unipolar world under the strong watchful gaze of NATO.

If he's married he absolutely thinks about joint military exercises while fucking his frumpy Austrian wife.

 

[AeroGavin Rossdale]

Anyone from one Donald J Trump to any number of experts and signed pledges of NATO memberscalled and call for an operable minimum of military spending. Belgium, maker of fine firearms, could at one time send paratroopers into Belgian Congo with their own resources. Now they don't even have an operable air defense system or much else military for that matter.

I guess the EU in NATO thing isn't completely nonsensical if that European Army idea that shows up every few years happened, but Gunther has never called for

 

[InspectorJappOfficial]

His interview with the college communists on Friday exemplifies this. They really thought he would be open to Marxism because they have no frame of reference for a Cold Warrior in this day and age. They don't even really push back when he said NATO and the US have done more for anti-imperialism and prosperity than any Socialist, likely because they've never met a no shit Regeanite.

Edit: They did say Gunther has a following of young leftists. I'll have to look into it, because if so.. lol. What world are we in where university pinkos don't know the common arguments against Ronny? How long before we can reinvent Thatcher as a girl boss liberating the poor workers from the imperialist Argies?

We're now in a world where "decolonialist" lefties are going to bat for openly pro-Hitler journalists because those journalists happen to also be anti-Israeli Arabs, and far right social conservatives are declaiming America and the EU as "Nazis" because of their support for the Ukraine against Glorious Mother Russia. I would honestly not be surprised to see a complete reappraisal of Hitler (by the terminally Current Thing left) and Stalin (by the terminally Current Thing right) within the course of the next year. Compared to that, a mere leftist embrace of Thatcher as a slayqueen girlboss feminist hero defending Western values against the Argentines who didn't even legalize abortion until extremely recently, seems fairly mundane.

Social media and this latest round of global crises have taken us somewhere beyond clown world, and we're approaching Francis E. Dec fever dream world.