Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[p1138]

COPE-O, when your doctor says you've had your last double bacon bourgon burber, and need to cut back or die.

Pfft, we know damn well Fatty ate half the fucking tray before editing the video and throwing that slide in about it tasting like vomit(even though it likely did taste like shit).

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Pfft, we know damn well Fatty ate half the fucking tray before editing the video and throwing that slide in about it tasting like vomit(even though it likely did taste like shit).

Of course he did. He just said it tasted like dog vomit because he didn't want to share with Jr.

 

[indomitable snowman]

I accidentally used vanilla almond milk instead of unflavored in making mashed potatoes. It was quite disgusting so I imagine the vanilla yogurt instead of sour cream didn't taste great.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

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Jack better ditch the electric scootypuff and walk then.

 

[Super Hans v2]

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I'd love to hear Jack's reasoning on the subject. Don't get me wrong, there's plenty of reasons to be anti-EV, like it just offloading polluting rich countries to making Africa even dirtier and it fueling child slavery, but if I know a single fucking thing about Jack, it's just because 'dos Gawd-damned librulz' promote it.

 

[p1138]

I'd love to hear Jack's reasoning on the subject. Don't get me wrong, there's plenty of reasons to be anti-EV, like it just offloading polluting rich countries to making Africa even dirtier and it fueling child slavery, but if I know a single fucking thing about Jack, it's just because 'dos Gawd-damned librulz' promote it.

Yeah, EVs have plenty of reasons to dislike them... but from Fatty? LOL, guy can't put together a coherent sentence(and failed to do so in this instance as well) and anyone with a functioning brain is supposed to assume he has some actual logic? Right.

 

[Kuritan Deplorable]

Jack better ditch the electric scootypuff and walk then.

how lame do you think a combustion mobility scooter would sound? At idle, the damned thing would whine nearly as loudly as Jack does.

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

how lame do you think a combustion mobility scooter would sound? At idle, the damned thing would whine nearly as loudly as Jack does.

Just imagine that engine struggling and belching smoke throughout the entire Scalfani household 24 hours a day.

 

[That Damned Tiger]

I'd love to hear Jack's reasoning on the subject. Don't get me wrong, there's plenty of reasons to be anti-EV, like it just offloading polluting rich countries to making Africa even dirtier and it fueling child slavery, but if I know a single fucking thing about Jack, it's just because 'dos Gawd-damned librulz' promote it.

Exactly. Like having to find one that works and stays plugged in. Or just finding one without needing to use the app because of scaling issues.

 

[densedance]

Just imagine that engine struggling and belching smoke throughout the entire Scalfani household 24 hours a day.

No shot, I am actually curious how it would be living with that guy. But I think we all know the answer without thinking too much about it. Does he even have friends outside of his bubble? Does Tam bring her girlfriends to the house, you know, having a nice dinner at night & chitchat around or does she have to go outside for it (just assuming if that would even happen)?

 

[Kuritan Deplorable]

Does he even have friends outside of his bubble

Evidence says no - When he was hospitalized, I don't remember hearing about any friends swinging by, and he doesn't seem to have any out-of-house hobbies. If he had any, they're estranged, at best. He's probably got a few 'community' friends through church and everyone else is online.

 

[ZipDisk]

electric scootypuff

how lame do you think a combustion mobility scooter

No need to speculate, at best it's going to sound like a leafblower, worst it'll just be a minibike someone swapped the seat and handlebars on.

 

[Bassomatic]

No way no mere leaf blower motor could move jack. You'd need a turbo charged tow truck motor. It would get 4 wal mart aisles a gallon at best.

I'm definitely not a fan of EVs and as a car guy I'm warming up to hybrids because it's moved from niche to handy especially with regen braking but, I digress. It's as mentioned before Jack being mad at stuff he thinks is bad but can't afford anyway.

The idea of a ICE scooty puff has a bright side, the doggos can just peacefully sleep and go to heaven (all dogs go there unlike Jack) vs being neglected and locked in harnesses.

God damn Rob, you're a national treasure, notice me senpai plz.

 

[EatBeforeYouEat]

Jacks gone through multiple strokes now right? He's got to be - on some level - mentally disabled from that shit. He's unironically like a T-virus zombie, alive, but unthinking and acting only to satiate his hunger for flesh. Raw, cooked, and everything in the middle.

Evidence says no - When he was hospitalized, I don't remember hearing about any friends swinging by, and he doesn't seem to have any out-of-house hobbies. If he had any, they're estranged, at best. He's probably got a few 'community' friends through church and everyone else is online.

More than the cognitive decline, and he was never an intelligent person to begin with, the most noticeable decline since the strokes has been in his personality and temperament. Someone posted the video of him eating that monster burger in 2010 recently and it was like watching a totally different person. Before he was a stupid fat guy who other fat guys liked to hang out with. Now he is a stupid fat manbaby who gets offended by everything. Or I could be totally wrong and the reason friends avoid him now is because nobody wants to hear him ask "How much is double cheeseburger?" like 10 times while holding the menu in his hands. Only Tammy can tolerate that somehow.

 

[Preciate it youtube]

Whoever called this as being Garrett-related, I think you nailed it - and of course, Garrett's animosity is well earned. If I were him and knew my little half brother was living an extended childhood on the family estate, while I've had to cobble together a precarious life selling acid and shit, I'd be bitter, too. As for the family drama, I'm guessing there's something about Garrett wanting to see Tammy's parents for Thanksgiving but not Jack.

I'm so ready for another stroke, lol.

 

[TheMovieGuy]

No shot, I am actually curious how it would be living with that guy. But I think we all know the answer without thinking too much about it. Does he even have friends outside of his bubble? Does Tam bring her girlfriends to the house, you know, having a nice dinner at night & chitchat around or does she have to go outside for it (just assuming if that would even happen)?

I feel like it would mostly just be him trying to make you do shit for him and whining if you don't.

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Whoever called this as being Garrett-related, I think you nailed it - and of course, Garrett's animosity is well earned. If I were him and knew my little half brother was living an extended childhood on the family estate, while I've had to cobble together a precarious life selling acid and shit, I'd be bitter, too. As for the family drama, I'm guessing there's something about Garrett wanting to see Tammy's parents for Thanksgiving but not Jack.

I'm so ready for another stroke, lol.

Yeah he's almost definitely malding about Garrett, so funny he thinks he was in the right over any of that. Hopefully the next stroke will fix his ability to reason so he can finally understand the many mistakes he's made throughout his life and attempt to fix some of them with the time he has left (2 months).

Just kidding, he'd be so unable to cope that he'd shovel texmex down his throat until his heart gave out.

 

[Freya]

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damn thats profound

 

[Falcon Sebben]

damn thats profound

For Mushbrain it is.

Yeah he's almost definitely malding about Garrett, so funny he thinks he was in the right over any of that. Hopefully the next stroke will fix his ability to reason so he can finally understand the many mistakes he's made throughout his life and attempt to fix some of them with the time he has left (2 months).

For narcs like Jagoff they can't conceive that they're wrong in any way. He's always going to maintain that he was right in choking Garrett until his nose started bleeding and he almost passed out.

 

[Pig Cups]

Does he even have friends outside of his bubble?

Evidence says no - When he was hospitalized, I don't remember hearing about any friends swinging by, and he doesn't seem to have any out-of-house hobbies. If he had any, they're estranged, at best. He's probably got a few 'community' friends through church and everyone else is online.

25 seconds into this upload, Jack mentions that Robert visited him in the hospital/nursing home "at least 20 times." He then goes on to seethe about his other "friends" who lived "like, a block away." Supposedly, these "friends" expressed hope for recovery, and said they'd visit Jack but never did. From his body language (the subconscious stroking of the raw meat, vocal cadence, etc.), Jack seems kind of irked/hurt by this, and appears to be trying to shove his emotions down so the viewer doesn't notice.

I think 99.99% of Jack's friends and acquaintances have fallen by the wayside and are through with him. Hell, when did we last see Robert? He might've finally hit his wall and tapped the fuck out. As @EatBeforeYouEat mentioned earlier, there was a point in his life where Jack, though dumb and fat, still had a personality that was tolerable for other people to be around and be friends with. That's completely gone now, and with it, any reason for anyone to knowingly be in Jack's presence.