Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Ihatejackscalfani]

Thanksgiving is almost here.

 

[SpiceyHuman]

Thanksgiving is almost here.

That literally looks like cow shit crammed into a turkey wtf

 

[Sonic T]

Thanksgiving is almost here.

That literally looks like what AI would output if you typed in "turkey dinner packed with cow shit".

 

[Uber driver reviewer]

I don't think that it's anything new. I think it predates the strokes entirely.

Ironically they have Obama to thank for that

 

[Sneedmiser]

Why do I get the feeling that Jack wouldn't fit into a standard aquamation vessel?
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They'd probably have to resort to an AH system meant for livestock disposal, like the one at KSU that looks like a fucking vat.
View attachment 5511881

They're going to tell him he's getting aquamated and then Tammy is just going to dump him into the horse grinder out of the back of the Hot Sauce Van.

 

[Ihatejackscalfani]

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"Temporarily"

I wonder what Jack thinks about being disabled in Heaven?

If there is a Heaven, that'd be funny seeing Jack riding around in his scooter.

Cocksucker.

 

[Super Hans v2]

I wonder what Jack thinks about being disabled in Heaven?

If there is a Heaven, that'd be funny seeing Jack riding around in his scooter.

Cocksucker.

Jack probably hasn't thought about that kind of thing, his ability to abstractly think must be damn near zero. But if he can, he's just looking forward to the unlimited quantities of various tube-shaped meats that he'll be hand fed by muscular servants.

 

[Pig Cups]

Thanksgiving is almost here.

That literally looks like cow shit crammed into a turkey wtf

If a psychologist were to use that image as part of some kind of Jungian association test, I'd immediately correlate that image with "fecal vomiting syndrome."

Just being honest- that's literally the first thing that came to mind...

 

[Ihatejackscalfani]

If a psychologist were to use that image as part of some kind of Jungian association test, I'd immediately correlate that image with "fecal vomiting syndrome."

Just being honest- that's literally the first thing that came to mind...

I've always had a visualization of "hemmorhoids"

To the younger generation here, don't look it up.

 

[The Grimace]

If they stop gorging on terrible food, they lose their financial means.

Such is the way of life in Burgerland for those infected by the Jewish Wendigo Golum in the year of our lord 2023. What a burden to bear for the sins of gluttony and greed.

Many such cases.



Also, posting some candidjacks because it’s funny to read his projected emotions

Now THESE are some wojak material expressions.

 

[EatBeforeYouEat]

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"Temporarily"

The words fail me. He actually thinks he is gonna get up and do that waddling gait again, doesn't he? Also the vibes from this post are super douchey. It's pretty much saying "unlike the permanently disabled people I'm gonna get better at least". Realistically, this asshole should have found this newfound respect for the disabled 5 years ago when he lost use of his dominant hand but he is retarded so he needed another stroke to find it.

 

[Uber driver reviewer]

That would imply having paid premiums over the whole time they've been married. I seriously don't think these fat fucks would do this or that anyone would underwrite term life for someone who's going to die any day now.

A few years ago Jack and Tammy became licensed agents in some MLM-ish life insurance “business” where they were going to convince everyone in their social circle to become “licensed insurance agents independent business owner and independent distributors” and one of the job perks was that everyone in the employ could buy a life insurance plan without preconditions limiting it.

They talked about it on like three CWJ’s then went radio silent.


I think Hammy’s mom (Carolynn) found the opportunity. She’s a shrewed business woman but increasingly falls for scams in her advanced age. So the plans are probably worthless

 

[Super Hans v2]

A few years ago Jack and Tammy became licensed agents in some MLM-ish life insurance “business” where they were going to convince everyone in their social circle to become “licensed insurance agents independent business owner and independent distributors” and one of the job perks was that everyone in the employ could buy a life insurance plan without preconditions limiting it.

They talked about it on like three CWJ’s then went radio silent.


I think Hammy’s mom (Carolynn) found the opportunity. She’s a shrewed business woman but increasingly falls for scams in her advanced age. So the plans are probably worthless

Don't TamHam's parents have a proper insurance business? They probably took on Jack as a sales agent because of how much he plays up being a big fucking deal on YouTube, then canned him because of the obvious.

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

The words fail me. He actually thinks he is gonna get up and do that waddling gait again, doesn't he? Also the vibes from this post are super douchey. It's pretty much saying "unlike the permanently disabled people I'm gonna get better at least". Realistically, this asshole should have found this newfound respect for the disabled 5 years ago when he lost use of his dominant hand but he is retarded so he needed another stroke to find it.

Jack's Black Power fist with the dying arm will never not be funny or appropriate. Now it's dead and he can't even walk.

I sure hope tam ham has to wipe him after a keto meal opioid poop.

Probably has the consistency and smearing properties of spackle.

"Bring the whole roll Tam"

 

[TheMovieGuy]

Jack's Black Power fist with the dying arm will never not be funny or appropriate. Now it's dead and he can't even walk.

View attachment 5513749

It's such a triumphant image, completely undercut by everything that's happened since. Maybe if Jack had stuck to physical therapy instead of begging God to fix everything for him he'd still be able to move that arm!

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Thanksgiving is almost here.

Oh dear GodBearJesus! He's going for a 100% meat stuffing because it's KETOOOOOOO!

Like this faggot needs more meat in his diet at this point. Jagoff really needs to get back to veggies. Or at least use low-carb bread for the stuffing or here's a completely whacked out idea. Don't eat the damn stuffing.

It's such a triumphant image, completely undercut by everything that's happened since. Maybe if Jack had stuck to physical therapy instead of begging God to fix everything for him he'd still be able to move that arm!

The sheer effort on his face in trying to lift the claw is telling. Dude has no muscles. Like at all. All you see is just fat.

 

[lindsayfan]

Jack's Black Power fist with the dying arm will never not be funny or appropriate. Now it's dead and he can't even walk.

i wish people would quit posting that weird edit with the fake background. the original from his FB is here:

 

[biggacracka]

Jack's Black Power fist with the dying arm will never not be funny or appropriate. Now it's dead and he can't even walk.

View attachment 5513749

Probably has the consistency and smearing properties of spackle.

"Bring the whole roll Tam"

I've seen this image countless times but only now did I realize he wrote "thank you all for you prayers" and not "for your prayers"

TL;DR : GET YOU PRAYERS

 

[Pig Cups]

Probably has the consistency and smearing properties of spackle.

I'm thinking it's more along the lines of the 30 pounds of compacted, clay-like fecal matter that was in Elvis Presley's colon.

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

I'm thinking it's more along the lines of the 30 pounds of compacted, clay-like fecal matter that was in Elvis Presley's colon.

"Tammy, bring a spoon too!"