DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell: General Discussion #2

Where is DSP?

  • He is in Connecticut visiting family/funeral

    Votes: 213 47.9%
  • He and Khet are on a honeymoon style trip

    Votes: 12 2.7%
  • He has an issue (s) with the HOA requiring immediate fixes

    Votes: 27 6.1%
  • Comcast/ISP/Internet Issues

    Votes: 16 3.6%
  • He is taking a Kino Casino style break by not announcing when he comes back

    Votes: 30 6.7%
  • Phil and/or Khet Health Issue

    Votes: 48 10.8%
  • This is a social experiment from DSP

    Votes: 99 22.2%

  • Total voters
    445
  • Poll closed .
Idk why DSP is obssesed with pretending like he has a ton of unique fans who show up for different types of games. Like its genuienly one of his most pathetic traits, hes obsessed with pretending like hes some sort of unique streamer. He straight up says hes not like other content creators because he plays all kinds of games....like dude that is not a unique trait, most streamers play more than one type of game. and of course him acting like he has thousands of unique fans that just dont all show up at once for any specific game is so sad, like we can see the names in chat man, its largely all the same dents
It's a cult cope segment, DSP doesn't care if anyone else buys it. All that matters is gassing himself and his paypigs up to sustain his fiefdom for another day.
 
Who could have seen it coming that watching ads is miserable, its almost like the whole point of ads is that they suck, thats why they put them in the middle of shows that people want to watch...
Also they are old ads so they are samey and the quality is trash.

Garbage idea garbage execution garbage streamer, what idea will come next thats somehow worse, a reackt of videogame end credits?.
 
Who could have seen it coming that watching ads is miserable, its almost like the whole point of ads is that they suck, thats why they put them in the middle of shows that people want to watch...
Also they are old ads so they are samey and the quality is trash.

Garbage idea garbage execution garbage streamer, what idea will come next thats somehow worse, a reackt of videogame end credits?.
Watching old ads can be entertaining. Go check Vinny Vinesauce or Jerma985. DSP is the issue here.
 
Idk why DSP is obssesed with pretending like he has a ton of unique fans who show up for different types of games. Like its genuienly one of his most pathetic traits, hes obsessed with pretending like hes some sort of unique streamer. He straight up says hes not like other content creators because he plays all kinds of games....like dude that is not a unique trait, most streamers play more than one type of game. and of course him acting like he has thousands of unique fans that just dont all show up at once for any specific game is so sad, like we can see the names in chat man, its largely all the same dents
Because the reality of his streams are probably incredibly hard to swallow for him. That he has at best Jeff as his most consistent supporter, ndo will occasionally come by to save the streams, and outside of a couple obscure folk the other retards who sank their life savings into him tapped out. His chat is full of people larping that they are going to fuck in his chat, people weening out by memeing they are true and honest fans, and derich or jayde spamming him for attention. His superchats and small tips are handled by basically trolls, people who want attention from detractors, or those weird mixes of both that ask him dumbshit questions like what he ate for dinner with their $5 in some 3rd world country's currency. It leaves us with a pretty clean dichotomy of DSP either being bamboozled by all this fuckery or aware of it enough to have to cope hard to prospective open wallets who might replace the ranks of the lost.

He's either genuinely too lacking creatively and cognitively to understand that the only large enough demographic that cares about if he's playing the hottest new release are kids and/or adults who have little to no access to disposable income enough to give a pittance to him. But he can't just break down and tell everyone he wishes he was an industry insider like he tried so hard to work out with Machinima (guaranteed they weren't super enthusiastic about getting DSP in front of people because anyone who watched his content could tell he was a knockoff AVGN content farm) because he's spent every day shitting on game journos and E3 showcases that to 180 into getting people to take him seriously would take some work from that alone. He's not insightful, he's not creative, he's not willing to put in any personal time to the craft, he just wants to point a camera at something and muddle through some games because it makes him ballpark high 5 low 6 figures by crying poor everyday.

That said, he can't acknowledge that anyone else in his field as an entertainer does anything that he himself does as a baseline because either he's really that jaded and egotistical to think he's somehow unique in being a variety streamer; or he's desperately afraid that if people find out that he's resting on the laurels that the next big release is going to save the channel and anyone else will put a monumental amount more effort into attempting to be engaging without counting out the dollar bills in the tip jar they'll just take their sweet donos and bail. Anything to ignore the fact that he's a monkey dancing for pennies from retards with more money and time than sense who just want to see what antics the Lolcow DarksydePhil will get up to next. He's not telling us he's having chill fun and loves games and loves his life, he's begging and pleading with everyone watching that they should perceive his world as such because of how paper thin the line is between him and Wings.
 
I've sufferd through 15 minutes in and this has what Phil has paused the video to pigsplain in excruciating detail so far:

  • Cloths existed in the 90s before Zorbeez cloths
  • You can clean spills without Zorbeez cloths if you do it quickly enough
  • If you only sell your product in extra large and Jumbo sizes, it's essentially the same as small and medium
  • A mom asking her kid "Is your room clean, we'll go to Chuck E Cheese" is insinuating that if the kid cleans his room the mom will take him to Chuck E Cheese
  • Chuck-E-Cheese Pizza is probably frozen Pizza.
  • Consoles release and are expensive, over time the price reduces
  • The Ludo-Narrative Dissonance of the board game Don't wake daddy. A game all about making noise is a silent game.
  • Tea exists in the USA, typically an alternative to Coffee.
That's enough for me.
 
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I've sufferd through 15 minutes in and this has what Phil has paused the video to pigsplain in excruciating detail so far:

  • Cloths existed in the 90s before Zorbeez cloths
  • You can clean stains without Zorbeez cloths if you do it quickly enough
  • If you only sell your product in extra large and Jumbo sizes, it's essentially the same as small and medium
  • A mom asking her kid "Is your room clean, we'll go to Chuck E Cheese, is insinuating that if the kid cleans his room the mom will take him to Chuck E Cheese
  • Chuck-E-Cheese Pizza is probably frozen Pizza.
  • Consoles release and are expensive, over time the price reduces
  • The Ludo-Narrative Dissonance of the board game Don't wake daddy. A game all about making noise is a silent game.
  • Tea exists in the USA, typically an alternative to Coffee.
That's enough for me.
Further evidence that DSP is a total moron, as if we needed any more.

Phil's high school must have a gas leak his senior year, otherwise there's no way he could have valedictorian.
 
image (5).png

haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalp
 
Christ almighty, the begging is off the fucking charts today. He's mentioning tips/taking shots literally every 10 minutes. And that's after starting the stream by saying he won't focus on any monetary goals today.

If you didn't know DSP, you'd think he's unironically suffering from dementia.
 
his first shots of Kahlúa today as he reached 100$

first shot:



second shot:



whole Kahlúa segment:


bonus.png

/edit:
"just a reminder *hinthint*
it might be funny to see me take another shot and see me buzzed"

he's fiending for the next shot

 
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I hope DSP had a dull and sad Thanksgiving.
Realistically he probably enjoyed the day about as much he's capable of enjoying anything since he's conditioned himself into believing that stuffing his fat face full of goutcentric food and booze and stuffing scopely's bank account with even more dentbux is enough to sustain him. Despite all the evidence to the contrary that tells us he lives in a perpetual state of denial, viewing every day of his life as some holiday event where he deserves to treat himself and binge to distract himself from the fact that he knows he's a reviled loser.

Edit: as evidenced in the horrific images above. Nice timing.
 
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