Brianna Wu / John Walker Flynt - "Biggest Victim of Gamergate," Failed Game Developer, Failed Congressional Candidate

I know it isn't going to happen but I really want DSP to play this. He would start off saying he played the original version and loved it on the PC and will try and sum up Wu's harassment and get so many things wrong. He will get pissed off by somehow failing every single fight and end it with a glowing review because he doesn't want to be another hater.
 
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Burned Man said:
I know it isn't going to happen but I really want DSP to play this. He would start off saying he played the original version and loved it on the PC and will try and sum up Wu's harassment and get so many things wrong. He will get pissed off by somehow failing every single fight and end it with a glowing review because he doesn't want to be another hater.
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The only way he plays this is if it becomes a Patron request. Period.
 
Okay folks, I had to call it quits at around 1.7 hours because the abuse of the lighting was giving me a migraine.

Even with some 'gaming' glasses to cut down on just how abrasive it is, it just didn't do the trick and I stuck out as long as I could. It was worth a try, and it DID cut down on the strain, but it just wasn't enough.

But, here's some quick thoughts on the monstrosity that is the game. Lets first start off with the abysmal 'Options' menu that has been presented to us, and take careful note of the lack of resolution... because that is as high as it will go unless you put it into full screen. And it is at that point, that the game seems to crash half the time on startup.
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Seriously, I don't even know the last time that I saw that as a max resolution for a NEW game, much less in the old games that have been 'patched' so that they can run on new systems (IE: Commander Keen, Fallout, Crusader).

I won't touch on it past this little bit, but the mouse sensitivity does not scale in any sort of way, shape, or form. I was finding myself lifting my mouse to re-center it when looking around and doing the walking simulator portion of the game(which is most of it).

Speaking of this walking simulator that gets you from one cutscene or combat to the next, it grows rather pedantic with each instance of it happening as you are left staring at the horribly misshapen hair of our main protagonist, Holiday.

Next, lets move onto the AUDIO portions of this game, and the complete lack of any manner of sound equalization going between the actual 'gameplay' and the 'cutscenes', as it is prone to blowing out eardrums if I was wearing a headset at the time. And it wasn't just one time, every single cutscene is at a significantly higher volume, and the audio crackling is unbearable.

And did I mention that I love the combat in this game, because there is nothing more abhorrent satisfying than having to wait in one single row, or corner of the combat screen for MINUTES on end as the enemy continues to refresh the obstacles that will essentially kill you instantly on 'Girls' mode. Oh how I wish I had used some screen capture software for this, just so I could show the fine folks of the internet just how excruciating pleasant it is.

I think that the only POSITIVE thing I can actually say about this game is the fact that, when it actually runs, it does run smoothly for the most part... sparing the hangups when changing 'scenes', the stuttering between 'gameplay' and cutscenes... maybe it's not so positive after all... *sigh*

BONUS STUFF
This was in an 'optional' side room that you could explore, I just grabbed a bunch of snaps and moved on since my time was precious. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did after having a chance to look at it in more detail.

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That's not how that works... that's not how ANY of that works...


EDIT: Links are broken! Fixing now.
EDIT 2.0: Albums don't work from within spoilers, apologies in advance for the cancer.
 
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Burned Man said:
I know it isn't going to happen but I really want DSP to play this. He would start off saying he played the original version and loved it on the PC and will try and sum up Wu's harassment and get so many things wrong. He will get pissed off by somehow failing every single fight and end it with a glowing review because he doesn't want to be another hater.
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Isn't this game actually IMPOSSIBLE to fail if you stockpile get-better-heroin injectors that auto-apply if you run out of HP and the game SHOWERS you in them? Granted, the controls sound fucking worse than before so maybe you can't even get that far.
 
Burned Man said:
I know it isn't going to happen but I really want DSP to play this. He would start off saying he played the original version and loved it on the PC and will try and sum up Wu's harassment and get so many things wrong. He will get pissed off by somehow failing every single fight and end it with a glowing review because he doesn't want to be another hater.
Click to expand...

DSP would play it if he got enough money.

As shitty as this game is, its also not very deep and he's all for games that take zero effort to finish. The bigger factor in him not touching it is that I think DSP hates PC.
 
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The bonus page also includes a support page that 404's so that's great.

But seriously, watching 2 streams it's really apparent this game just....isn't fun.

I don't know if "girlfriend mode" adds value at all, but even on Normal it seems insultingly easy and almost everything is locked down, you can't even control your character - you can only go where Wu says you can go. I know a lot of games use the illusion of choice - but Rev 60 isn't even subtle about it.

"yeah you can only move if you click on the green circles and there's like...one! CHOICES!!"

Bleh - good she got it out and it's playable I guess?
 
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A problem I'd anticipated.

The saturation for the colors are far too high, and in many instances there are far too many that clash horribly with no rhyme or reason to it other than "LOOK! PRETTY COLORS!" so even if you don't necessarily have weak eyes, it's going to be a major strain on them.
 
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Radical Goodspeed said:
DSP would play it if he got enough money.

As shitty as this game is, its also not very deep and he's all for games that take zero effort to finish. The bigger factor in him not touching it is that I think DSP hates PC.
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is for PC he doesn't play in the master race

Ichimaru Gin said:
WAIT YOU WERE SERIOUS?!
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Yep apparently being blocked by Wu on twitter is a feature of the game
 
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JSGOTI said:
BONUS STUFF
This was in an 'optional' side room that you could explore, I just grabbed a bunch of snaps and moved on since my time was precious. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did after having a chance to look at it in more detail.
Click to expand...

1v4Gssa.jpg


I assume this is how everybody felt about missed deadlines.
 
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