Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

My face is legit hurting from laughing so hard at the piling on of that ugly gay jersey.
Some 9 year old in a Chinese factory probably spent like two hours at 11 cents/per assembling that shit.
Can't wait for Jagoff to dribble some sauced pulporks down the front of it so Tranny can wash it, then melt it down and kill it in the dryer on only low heat

This will definitely be the first and last time we ever see that jersey.

 

[Kosher Salt]

Also why cowboys? He's in Titans territory and he was in raiders/rams territory before.

He's a latent homosexual. He craves cowboy cock.

 

[Sonic T]

I don't get it. Isn't that exactly what he's doing with those stupid ass thermometers? What fucking lane does he actually want to pick??

 

[Asperchewy]

Is there a link to the newest episode of PCLM?

 

[Uber driver reviewer]

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Also, here’s the updated knife list:

Spoiler: 12/27/23 Updated Knife List

#	Name
1	Edge of Belgravia Knives
2	Mr. Chef Knife Set
3	Ideeland Pro 8" Chef Knife
4	Zelite Infinity Knives
5	Zelite Knives (follow up w/ Santoku)
6	Victorinox Knives
7	Miracle Blades Series 3
8	Aeroknife
9	Miracle Blades World Class Series
10	Klitory Damascus Steel Chef
11	Vie Belles Reserve Knives
12	Imarku Knives - 2018
13	Tuo Cutlery - 2019
14	The Chef Club Knives
15	Tuo Knives Falcon Series - 2020
16	Tuo Legacy Series - 2021
17	Yoshi Blade
18	"Knife Aid" Shark Tank
19	Hammer Stahl Cutlery
20	Steinbruke Knives
21	Granitstone Knives
22	Imarku Knives -2022
23	CardSharp 2
24	HexClad Japanese Damascus Steel Knives
25	Kyoku Knives

Sorry I haven’t been around much, but hope you had (or are having) a nice holiday if you celebrate.

All chinesium garbage.

 

[Super Hans v2]

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I don't get it. Isn't that exactly what he's doing with those stupid ass thermometers? What fucking lane does he actually want to pick??

You don't understand, Jack's a big fucking deal on YouTube, he has to agile and respond to market demand day by day. That, or he's just a 7 times stroke-brained retard who can't hold a consistent thought for five minutes anymore.

 

[Pig Cups]

Tammy must dress him. There is no fucking way this lump could put pants on by himself, and yet he still occasionally makes snide comments to his wife on video...

And that's why his shitty behavior towards her is so enraging. Not because I/we have any sympathy for her- it's been long established that she's a piece of shit who (based on her marrying him) possesses zero standards. Considering that, she probably doesn't even see her own life as the miserable existence that we view it as, ass-wiping and all. It's par for her course.

It's maddening because he clearly takes her for granted, when there are better, more deserving people out there who sadly lack such a precious resource. You've illustrated that mere dressing and toileting are necessary life tasks that are beyond him. Ergo, he has no independence. If she dies/becomes incapacitated, or (less likely) snaps one day from his thankless childishness and leaves, he's the absolute definition of screwed. And yet, as you point out, he still has the unmitigated gall to make those snide remarks/purposely anger and annoy her.

Jack is blissfully unaware at the degree to which his existence is a house of cards at this point. Forget death, he's one heartbeat away from another serious-but-not-fatal medical emergency that leaves him bedridden and mute. He daily runs the risk of his only support system evaporating due to ill-health or surrender. And what happens then? Will Junior The Niggersayer or BriBri pick up the load if needed? Maybe. But they could just as easily refuse, render him a ward of the state, and send him to rot in some shitty, state-run LTC facility.

Either way, it'll be a prison of invalidity brought on by his own gluttony, selfishness, inflexibility, and retardation. No way out. This is literally what he's teetering on the brink of, and he doesn't fucking care.

Fatty didn’t even do a true time lapse for the test. It’s a still image with lower thirds over the top. The lighting is the same in the background, no doubt the sun would have been down in TN by 6:40/7:40pm this time of year.

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What a dumb video. Of course the Tik Tok mug was going to fail. You can tell by how cheap the lid design looks.

My favorite moments are:
1.) Buys Whines for Tammy to pay for a $40 mug "off of TikTok," despite telling us how much he hates TikTok and doesn't use it. Absolute terminal consoomer.

2.) His implying that he pulled the Walmart mug off the shelf like a child seeing a strange object, and pleaded with Tammy to waste another $20 (:37)

3.) Him struggling to explain the mugs/test results (2:54), needing Tammy's assistance. He's slowly dying as is, so the non-effort required for making this video has surely left him mentally/physically drained, as if he just completed a triathlon.

4.) His inability to properly specify the brand of the "TikTok one," and the way he barely sounded out "Ozark Trail" without Tammy's help. A fat lot of good that does us, as potential buyers. Additionally, the way he refers to the mugs by where they were purchased, rather than by brand name, makes it sound like he thinks the products themselves are actually made by TikTok/Walmart, and not separate brands. It's like a bughiver thinking food "comes from the store," without even considering the preceding agricultural component. This is further implied when Jack gurgles out "congratulation...to Walmart" before abruptly slapping on the end card. I'm sure the soulless megacorp is absolutely thrilled to have your praise, fatty.

What a joke.

 

[p1138]

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I don't get it. Isn't that exactly what he's doing with those stupid ass thermometers? What fucking lane does he actually want to pick??

He has no idea what the fuck he's doing other than getting gadgets with buttons and blinking lights to smoke more pulporks with. He might still have a couple contacts from his brother that got his shit into walmart and the chinese audio crap that gets him a few of the products, but the bulk of it is just shit he buys so he can act like a toddler showing off his new toys on camera. If he were actually smart, he'd setup referral deals with brands he actually liked the products for, and then just not do it for the stuff he didn't like. But he probably can't grasp that concept either. Maybe it's due to his mushbrain getting confused about messages at the mega church about not buying dumb shit and following the spirit of jesus or whatever while throwing piles of money at the same church for no reason?

And that's why his shitty behavior towards her is so enraging. Not because I/we have any sympathy for her- it's been long established that she's a piece of shit who (based on her marrying him) possesses zero standards. Considering that, she probably doesn't even see her own life as the miserable existence that we view it as, ass-wiping and all. It's par for her course.

It's maddening because he clearly takes her for granted, when there are better, more deserving people out there who sadly lack such a precious resource. You've illustrated that mere dressing and toileting are necessary life tasks that are beyond him. Ergo, he has no independence. If she dies/becomes incapacitated, or (less likely) snaps one day from his thankless childishness and leaves, he's the absolute definition of screwed. And yet, as you point out, he still has the unmitigated gall to make those snide remarks/purposely anger and annoy her.

Jack is blissfully unaware at the degree to which his existence is a house of cards at this point. Forget death, he's one heartbeat away from another serious-but-not-fatal medical emergency that leaves him bedridden and mute. He daily runs the risk of his only support system evaporating due to ill-health or surrender. And what happens then? Will Junior The Niggersayer or BriBri pick up the load if needed? Maybe. But they could just as easily refuse, render him a ward of the state, and send him to rot in some shitty, state-run LTC facility.

Either way, it'll be a prison of invalidity brought on by his own gluttony, selfishness, inflexibility, and retardation. No way out. This is literally what he's teetering on the brink of, and he doesn't fucking care.

Yeah, she's still a total cunt on her own and deserves everything she gets but it's genuinely amazing how shitty Fatty is. This is why I've said multiple times that his sentience should be called into question because he has no sense of self preservation or self awareness.

4.) His inability to properly specify the brand of the "TikTok one,"

Seriously, wtf does this even mean without the damned brand? There's going to be a different "tiktok one" in 3 months, and there was likely a different "tiktok one" 3 months ago. At least with his previous stupid ice melting cup video, he took footage of it at different times. To just use the one obvious still image and only update the time at the bottom... so amazingly lazy. Could have at least left the camera on the tripod and taken different pictures to show the passage of time to at least imply he didn't fake it.

 

[a terminal posture]

$20+ burgers at another Citywalk (TM) joint.

 

[p1138]

$20+ burgers at another Citywalk (TM) joint.

Fatty needs to call it Cityscoot, he ain't walking. He went to this place last year and got "hamburger sushi", assumes his audience can't figure out wtf a spiked shake is, especially considering it says there's booze in the damned description.

1:00 "are mocktails non-alcoholic?" what the fuck do you think the mock part means?
1:50 So much for Fatty not drinking booze. Drinks a milkshake that has Jack Daniels in it, of course he likes that because it has Jack in the name.
2:00 "it's like a rangoon shell with the insides as dip" holy fuck Jr's fake ass accent is obnoxious.
2:25 claims those fried pickles are "lightly coated"... no there's nothing light about that.
3:10 Everyone else got truffle(lol, it's just going to be truffle oil, ain't no damn truffle to be seen there) fries(of course with bacon), Fatty is proud he swapped out his fries for cole slaw with bacon in it. Rates the place at A+ because gud meat, can't remember wtf burger he oredered "lotta bacun"
3:25 Starts talking about some event that's now indoors that Tammy is getting tickets for. Doesn't say wtf it is.
4:00 I guess they decided for some fucking reason to do one of those night events where most of the people are out of the park? I'm not sure wtf for since Fatty and Tammy can't fit on any rides... although "Tammy is going to take the kids onto that rollercoaster" they're grown ass adults, they don't need adult supervision on a rollercoaster
4:18 "I'd do it but you know what I rember did I do day" did he just have another fucking stroke?
4:40 makes it a point to show a water fountain and tell us there's money in it... no shit? "it goes to charity, I'd throw money in there just to throw money in there" so then why mention it goes to charity if you don't care where the money goes?

 

[a terminal posture]

2:25 claims those fried pickles are "lightly coated"... no there's nothing light about that.

Look again that is a light breading and the only dish that actually looked good.

 

[TheGuntinator]

Out of all the years of making fun of Jack in such a large thread. Has there even been one instance where Jack has ever helped anyone out?

He helped his son beat a weed addiction

 

[indomitable snowman]

He's a latent homosexual. He craves cowboy cock.

Why not a Rams fan then. He can go to Ram Ranch!

$20+ burgers at another Citywalk (TM) joint.

I think on every item he asked what it was. He has no object permanence at this point
There's also something strange about a menu with burgers and sushi. I've watched enough kitchen nightmares to find large diverse menus a red flag.

 

[p1138]

Look again that is a light breading and the only dish that actually looked good.

That's a normal breading for fried pickles, there's nothing light or heavy about it.

 

[Hungry Homeless Handjob]

$20+ burgers at another Citywalk (TM) joint.

 

[ZipDisk]

I wonder if Jack's throat condition is degenerative, he went from gurgle to baloon pinch.
"Hyur we arr"
Ideally he'd end up sounding like yoda.

Junior sounding feminine and Jack sounding like Miss Piggy would be funny as fuck.

Jack ordering swine burger is hilarious. Him going on the euthanasia coaster would be even better.

(When logged in on regular site, the reply box was gone, on Brave Onion Tor, it works)

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

What's the over/under date for fatty's next stroke given the carnivore diet plans for the new year?

 

[Kuritan Deplorable]

What's the over/under date for fatty's next stroke given the carnivore diet plans for the new year?

If he doesn't cheat so badly as to make it irrelevant, I'd be surprised if he makes it to the end of February without another health scare. Especially when his portion control resembles a drunk tetris player stuffing pieces in every which way.

 

[AnOminous]

My favorite moments are:
1.) Buys Whines for Tammy to pay for a $40 mug "off of TikTok," despite telling us how much he hates TikTok and doesn't use it. Absolute terminal consoomer.

Yet he's repeatedly stolen recipes from TikTok.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Anyway, I still can't believe that retards thought that pngs were ever worth anything just because they had a token attached to them.

It's no different than Bitcoin when you get down to it. The only reason Bitcoin, NFTs and other forms of crypto are worth anything is because people are willing to spend money on them. Bitcoin has no inherent value. The blockchain? I'm totally 100% behind that kind of technology but how does it actually produce money? It doesn't. Nothing is being produced. It's just computer cycles when you get down to it.

I wonder if he knows someone who made a bit of money off NFT's. Not life changing amounts or he'd have been all over it, but maybe just a few hundred bucks on the side sorta deal.

That actually does make sense in it's own twisted way. He's angy that somebody else made money off of it and he feels they didn't earn it?

The idea of a non fungible token is kinda interesting for something like contracts and ways to validate ownership or something. Stupid monkey pictures were never going to be more than a boom/bust fad.

And this is why I'm all behind the idea of the blockchain. Something like this could be used to validate somebody's ownership of a particular IP or objet d'art.

View attachment 5593629

Also, here’s the updated knife list:

Spoiler: 12/27/23 Updated Knife List

#	Name
1	Edge of Belgravia Knives
2	Mr. Chef Knife Set
3	Ideeland Pro 8" Chef Knife
4	Zelite Infinity Knives
5	Zelite Knives (follow up w/ Santoku)
6	Victorinox Knives
7	Miracle Blades Series 3
8	Aeroknife
9	Miracle Blades World Class Series
10	Klitory Damascus Steel Chef
11	Vie Belles Reserve Knives
12	Imarku Knives - 2018
13	Tuo Cutlery - 2019
14	The Chef Club Knives
15	Tuo Knives Falcon Series - 2020
16	Tuo Legacy Series - 2021
17	Yoshi Blade
18	"Knife Aid" Shark Tank
19	Hammer Stahl Cutlery
20	Steinbruke Knives
21	Granitstone Knives
22	Imarku Knives -2022
23	CardSharp 2
24	HexClad Japanese Damascus Steel Knives
25	Kyoku Knives

Sorry I haven’t been around much, but hope you had (or are having) a nice holiday if you celebrate.

Like that's going to happen. We all know Jr says to "kill that nigger" instead.