- Joined
- Sep 15, 2016
Dude: Exposure therapy. The more you talk with wahmen, the less scary it’ll be.
Are you lost needing femoid advice post here - For the poor bastard's who dare or are just curious
- Thread starter Justa Grata Honoria
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Dude: Exposure therapy. The more you talk with wahmen, the less scary it’ll be.
- Joined
- Sep 15, 2016
Not a femoid either, but I think that the “I can fix him/her” instinct can be strong on both sexes.
Men fall in love with boomers and strippers all the time.
Women fall for ex-cons and drug addicts. Also they tend to have the right kind of personality to make connections. They’re confident and got lots of interesting stories.
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2019
To be fair this retardation where you fuck your life up for man/ woman is more common for women. How many women are pimped out , used for clearing debts etc. open relationships subs and you will see men will not date anyone seriously with six digits debts be i t student or something else . There were guys wanting a woman with good credit score and zero debt so they can get the house they want. Women are rarely that calculated and if they are like that with one man they will waste it on another. Fucking hell my mom and stepmom both come to my mind marrying a trashbag like my dad and not leaving until they are sent to hospital from the abuse. And both landed with debts and or leeched by him .
I rarely see that with men most of them tolerate some bs but once shit becomes obvious they pack shit up and leave. Women will just double triple down no matter how bad is it until it really blows up in their face .
- Joined
- Oct 27, 2021
This is the kind of thing focused therapy or at least intentional self-effort can help with. You're not helpless unless you choose to be.
This is generally not a good rule. Agree on prolonged/creepy staring, but some eye contact is good, expected, and indicates both potential interest (even if just as a human) and comfort with oneself. And on that last point, fake it til you make it.
This makes no sense. Break it off bc they sat at the bar? ...As an aside, personally, I love sitting at the bar, and though it's slightly uncomfortable OP didn't think about a reservation, a chill girl would roll with it and be fine at the bar - which it sounds like she was. So where's the scary thing in that part?
BTW, sitting at the bar doesn't mean it's harder to talk - you angle towards the person and lean in a little. It's actually quite intimate if you want it to be. But you can also decide to keep some space, whatever appropriate for how we'll you know them.
As far as being late - well, I'm not sure getting torqued about it is reasonable...after all, OP didn't even have a car and had to get her to pick him up. Not great for a first date.
@ShiftyBoi , I wonder if once you two decided to date you both got a little stiff and awkward. A little anxiety getting ready for a date can lead to delays...and once you're running late the lateness and anxiety keep piling up higher and higher.
Not saying you should stay dating if you don't like her. But it seems odd to ditch out bc she was late, and you're feeling edgy or uncertain.
A Crying Goblin
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 18, 2023
@Friend of Dorothy Parker Eye contact with women is less of an issue for me. If a girl looks at me and smiles it can make my day for about 15 seconds before I go back to being miserable
- Joined
- Oct 27, 2021
Hey, next time do this: you know how you say you ruminate for days, months years over bad or embarrassing things? Next time a girl smiles at you, enjoy the 15 seconds, and then bring it back to mind an hour later. Then when you remember it, smile to yourself again and get another 10 or 15 seconds of a warm feeling to enjoy (and remember that before it gets overcome by the doom & gloom that says it will probably be the last woman who ever smiles at you and what if that is true and should you have talked to her or was she pity-smiling or idk, whatever might run through your mind to try to flatten a nice little moment). Then a little later, recall the moment again. You won't likely get too many recalls of a small moment like that (though you might, if you want to), but I mean this as an entry point for something to practice in general, which is training yourself to linger on nice things more. Because if that's two more minutes in your day that feels genuinely good rather than bad or blah, then that's two good minutes. And you build from there. And at some point, the cascade of negative thoughts (however it happens for you*) can be less dominant.
*...I went through a period of heavily negative rumination, and it was a constant
You can do this with any nice thing - you see a cool, colorful bird that appeals to you; you got you home tasks done early so you can truly relax on a Sunday afternoon; the grocery clerk said something funny; you got a "nice job" at work; you held the door for someone with their hands full; you found a quarter. Practice lingering on those things a bit and let them elevate you. Maybe even for 20 seconds instead of 15. No one's actually standing behind you saying you don't deserve to enjoy things. (Though you might want to figure out whose voice it is that in is your mind telling you so.)
- Joined
- Aug 3, 2022
How do we make this thread more exciting and less boring?
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2019
Nigga this isnt about getting laid with different woman thread you need pick up artistry thread or share stories of the wahmen you fucked thread wrong sub forum too
- Joined
- Aug 3, 2022
That sounds boring too. Plus men would lie and embellish it all.
Still, I would love more excitement here. Some enthusiasm. Less self-pity.
You know.
FUN!
- Joined
- Aug 28, 2019
- Joined
- Aug 3, 2022
Neither, just another esoteric theory about the divine and unknowable.
I'm a big fan of "We don't know (yet)" and "We should try to find out".
A Crying Goblin
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 18, 2023
@Friend of Dorothy Parker I mean girls don't smile at me, ever. So I don't gotta worry thankfully.
The thread is literally titled "ARE YOU LOST NEEDING ADVICE" Not going to be exciting or happy. You're in the wrong place.
- Joined
- Nov 21, 2020
When women do smile at you it's not out of interest, it's their natural reaction to try and disarm the situation when they perceive a threat.
- Joined
- Aug 3, 2022
Stop wallowing in your misfortune and instead of bothering the mom club, read the stoics or something.
A Crying Goblin
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 18, 2023
Well then they aren't perceiving me as threatening, none of them smile at me. So good I guess.
The what????? And no, cope.
No. Not the biggest fan of Greek culture or philosophy. It's too Alien for me.
- Joined
- Oct 27, 2021
Silly.
I'd give a virtual smile (as a girl), but I'm not your target audience, so I doubt it would have the impact. So here's just a human-adjacent (virtual) one:
But fine! Forget that example (of a woman's smile) and do the other things.
I'm TRYING!
It may be earnest-posting, which isn't exciting (unless it
And btw, after your carping about people not listening to your song-embedded wisdom (which I, at least, did), did you listen to mine? Oh, wait, shit, that was in the grammar thread today. Go there. You'll hate it!
Christ. I'm 85% sure you're taking the piss, but I'm responding because of the 15% doubt (not of you, specifically). Do you never do anything just out of good nature or wanting to feel good (human connection is good) or bring a smile to someone else's face?
Dang, today I went out of my way to thank someone effusively (who was just doing her job, albeit in an effective, well-tempered, and helpful way) because she did help me on something that was stressing me out. And I could tell that she appreciated being appreciated. Which then made me feel good(er). And you bet I also gave her a great rating in the post-interaction survey. I have no idea if she's great at her job, or even a decent person...and I don't care. She helped me and made my day better, so I wanted her to get a little + in the small ways I had to offer. And especially because working on the Friday before a Monday holiday having to take calls from idiots like me in a (calm) panic and asking for an exception/extension for something important due in by tomorrow has to suck. And odds are that her employer looks at metrics for evaluations, so she should get a good metric input from someone whose problem she solved competently.
This is normal stuff, folks. Maybe I think about it intentionally more than average (idk), but life is so much more enjoyable when you can just be...nice or let people know (directly and indirectly) that are appreciated - and, similarly, when you can tolerate or even value receiving the same from others.
Hey! Fuck you!
Girls do that, too.
Seriously, tho, sometimes launching straight into Epictetus doesn't provide a lightning bolt of inspiration. Sometimes that's Stage 3 or 4, and if you're at Stage 0 or 1, it's just going to be boring and unrelatable. Sometimes.
- Joined
- Aug 3, 2022
I should embed like 5 more songs about what to do with the ladies!
Post some links to your stuff that I should read, I am really lost in the BP.
I visited like 4-5 threads. One of them was that cottagecore or w/e thing that I thought was about music, dear lord.
- Joined
- Dec 3, 2020
Nah, its hybristophilia, look it up, might have an evolutionary component in that for hundreds of thousands if not millions of years females where better off pairing with violent psychos that would protect them than well mannered soygrugs who would get clobbered and eaten by the psychogrugs, and their women raped/also eaten.
I would argue that the number of men taken to the cleaners during a divorce its far higher. Pimped women are a more extreme and rare case in that they tend to be girls who themselves are in a really bad situation (no money, no family, runaways, etc) and the pimp "saves" her only to put her in the market as soon as he can convince her that having sex with other men doesn't mean she's not his girlfriend anymore.
Point is most women don't fall for that, way more (and yet still a small number) fall for the porn bf fiasco. You really see this with all the girls camming, there's always the "boyfriend" who handles everything for her, by which I mean takes the money and spends it. Starts with boudoir pics, then moves to actual nudes, then to hardcore porn with him, but his face never shows so if he has to go back to a normal job he can, but she can't, she's forever the girl with the face full of jizz in 4K. That if she's not one of those girls who gets pushed all the way to doing gangbangs, then she's the girl getting piped by six black guys in 4K, good luck living with that.
Sure there are hundreds maybe thousands of cases, but there are far more men doing sudoku because divorce left them on the street.
Lets be honest most of those guys are coping hard, odds are they are not getting propositions from indebted women either. On the other hand you get so many complete trainwrecks in online dating than I can't blame most men for doing a 180 and leaving.
Odds are they didn't like that guy much and were using him, and in turn they are now being used by another guy.
Boomers do that a lot, "yeah man I banged like 20 chicks back in woodstock" no you didn't, you got drafted to 'nam, got the clap from a thai ladyboy and then worked at the same hardware store for 40 years you geezer...
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A Crying Goblin
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 18, 2023
@Friend of Dorothy Parker Not my target audience? What does that mean?
"Human adjacent" Yes, me and you are both biologically, genetically humans. But there is a very clear separation between someone like You and Me. Something which goes beyond the fact that you're older and female, and I'm younger and male. Our brains do not work the same way. You derive dopamine from positive emotions and interactions with people. I derive dopamine from the confrontation of others, and another aspect I was very reluctant to mention, but I think it's necessary for our talk here: My performance in a theoretical combat situation. I have to be sure when I'm looking at someone. How quickly can they subdue me and overwhelm me, how well armed are they? How quickly can they attack my vital points? You don't know when the next dude may be carrying a knife and just slashes your penis and testicles off, goes for your eyes, causes some irreparable harm to your cock/vital life sustaining organs. ETC. Thus I have to surround myself with weapons and constantly practice in the event of a theoretical combat situation. Close range, long range, ETC.
That's the reason why I think it was destiny that I was chosen to be bald. Even though my sexual marketplace value and physical attractiveness to women has been dramatically, significantly reduced, I will never be a cute boy, or a handsome man, that girls actually, legitimately want or desire. I will always be something Alien and foreign looking to them. This hairless, pale demonic looking creature. It's the reason soldiers shave their heads, to look uniform, to shed their human identity, and of course to prevent the enemy from grappling them.
And that's why I've shed that metaphysical concept of humanity, I've gone beyond it. I will always serve and protect the people around me, I will always be a slave to them. I will always fake my humanity to fit in. But I'll never really be anything beyond that. Much as you have worker ants, worker termites, there are different "Castes" of humans. I will never be the same Human as you. And I can never hope to be. Socially, sexually, and in terms of my life worth, I will always be a weak, sad shell of what you call "Human." Unworthy of the title.
"Human adjacent" Yes, me and you are both biologically, genetically humans. But there is a very clear separation between someone like You and Me. Something which goes beyond the fact that you're older and female, and I'm younger and male. Our brains do not work the same way. You derive dopamine from positive emotions and interactions with people. I derive dopamine from the confrontation of others, and another aspect I was very reluctant to mention, but I think it's necessary for our talk here: My performance in a theoretical combat situation. I have to be sure when I'm looking at someone. How quickly can they subdue me and overwhelm me, how well armed are they? How quickly can they attack my vital points? You don't know when the next dude may be carrying a knife and just slashes your penis and testicles off, goes for your eyes, causes some irreparable harm to your cock/vital life sustaining organs. ETC. Thus I have to surround myself with weapons and constantly practice in the event of a theoretical combat situation. Close range, long range, ETC.
That's the reason why I think it was destiny that I was chosen to be bald. Even though my sexual marketplace value and physical attractiveness to women has been dramatically, significantly reduced, I will never be a cute boy, or a handsome man, that girls actually, legitimately want or desire. I will always be something Alien and foreign looking to them. This hairless, pale demonic looking creature. It's the reason soldiers shave their heads, to look uniform, to shed their human identity, and of course to prevent the enemy from grappling them.
And that's why I've shed that metaphysical concept of humanity, I've gone beyond it. I will always serve and protect the people around me, I will always be a slave to them. I will always fake my humanity to fit in. But I'll never really be anything beyond that. Much as you have worker ants, worker termites, there are different "Castes" of humans. I will never be the same Human as you. And I can never hope to be. Socially, sexually, and in terms of my life worth, I will always be a weak, sad shell of what you call "Human." Unworthy of the title.
- Joined
- Oct 27, 2021
This one of them? (Lol, doubt, but it's funny anyway
The grammar thread is in General Discussion. Here's the link (shows as *.net, but iirc, all links now resolve correctly regardless of which domain you're in):
Post in thread 'Grammar and language issues that drive you utterly berserk'
https://kiwifarms.net/threads/gramm...rive-you-utterly-berserk.178279/post-17424336
The link is to my comment with music, but if you love gramnar, there are 8 juicy pages to sperg over.
Also, here's the latest music I posted in the music thread. Got a wild hair and went down an old, weird path:
Post in thread 'What are you listening to right now?'
https://kiwifarms.net/threads/what-are-you-listening-to-right-now.159/post-17416274
Lol, I got 3 things from that thread: 1) confirmation that hyperspecialization and labeling is out of control, 2) one of the -cores - I forget the name, but a bunch of Asian girls in layers - is nice, and 3) a lead on and purchase of an awesome pair of gardening overalls.
You could also visit Chantal's thread in Deathfats, in which a 500 (*she says 363) lb, 39-yo woman has recently returned from her holy Muslim lark in Kuwait with her sub-literate-IQ boy toy to her native Canada for diabetes treatment to avert amputation, organ shutdown, and whatever else, only to learn within days that her dear huzzband has been secretly sexting scat and humiliation fantasies with a member of her own "VIP" community.
Or there's the munchies thread in BP. Look for posts in the last month or two from Kate Farms Shill, as she's posted a ton of catchup summaries (or, for me, first-time summaries) of a number of young women convinced (or trying to convince the world) they are dying of rare, yet insta-perfect diseases and debilitating conditions. Common themes, beyond the mystery conditions: Disney, dogs (not like that), horses (not like that), Disney, wheelchairs, ports, feeding tubes, and more Disney. Grab a drink; it's WEIRD.
And unless you've eaten recently, there's always the SRS/GRS thread in Stinkditch for good gore.