The Julays Ninth Annual Lolcow Awards 2023 - Which lolcow will claim the throne?

[IAmTheSmackDaddy]

Best Internet Famous and Grift Wars Lolcow: Jean-Francois Gariepy / JFG
Queen of the Beauty Parlour: Blair Zoń / Blair Victoria Kristy / iilluminaughtii
Fresh Meat: Christopher Vito Gesualdi / Vito the Pedo

Alan Michael White Opsec Fail Award: @SamanthaPrater

Best Lolcow Media: Boogie vs Wings

 

[Null]

even fun and merriment on this website triggers retards

 

[Near]

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even fun and merriment on this website triggers retards

Twitter's rotting glorious leader's brain again

 

[Esmeraude]

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even fun and merriment on this website triggers retards

This fuckhead:



Best Main Forum Lolcow: KingCobraJFS
Queen of the Beauty Parlour: SSSniperwolf
Best Animal Control Lolcow: Million Pity

 

[RL Steinbeck]

Lolcow of the Year: Nick Rekieta

Best Main Forum Lolcow: KingCobraJFS
Best Internet Famous & Grift Wars Lolcow: Jean-Francois Gariepy
Best Stinkditch & Rat King Lolcow: Frederik Knudson

Alan Michael White Opsec Fail Award: @thegooddoctor
Best Lolcow Media: Dream v. Cantu

Thanks, @Hamplanet Fitness, for the effort and dedication behind this, the most prestigious of ceremonies.

 

[Mr Steal Your Farm]

Best Main Forum Lolcow: Daniel Larson
Best Animal Control Lolcow: Caden Wayne "Jade" Scholeck / BlueFolf
Fresh Meat: Hannah Pearl Davis / justpearlythingz

Alan Michael White Opsec Fail Award: @Itsnatsutalbott
Best Lolcow Media: Kicked Out of the Ice Cream Shop

 

[Hokuriku]

LOTY: switching to Rekeita, he's making an all-out sprint for the finish line.

Best Main Forum Lolcow: Cooking With Jack
Best Internet Famous & Grift Wars Lolcow: JFG
Fresh Meat: Jackie Singh

Best Lolcow Media: Cyraxx's arrest

 

[FinallyRealEmail]

Lolcow of the Year: Elliot William Fong, just fuck him and his raping women. Walking around with a slithering “snake” and all the “girl talks” he has.
Best Main Forum: Josh Saunders, the entertainment and just general way he looks fucked up/ spergs out.
Breaker of Scales: Chantel, the Christmas card Null sent that you could always turn things around yet you have only gotten worse lmao true breaker of scales.
Best Internet Famous & Grift Wars Lolcow: Linus, day of the rake can’t come soon enough.
Best Stinkditch & Rat King Lolcow: Dave Muscato, just lock that freak up.
Best Put to Pasture Lolcow: Audrey Hale, fuck that awful piece of shit wish the cops killed her faster.
Best media: Boogie VS Wings, watching that live was awesome and it is still hilarious also how it ties into Boogies downfall
Best opsec fail: Boogie, lmfao come on

 

[The Real Slim Shady]

Best Main Forum Lolcow: Liz Fong Jones
Best Internet Famous & Grift Wars Lolcow: Linus Gabriel Sebastian
Best Stinkditch & Rat King Lolcow: Alex Carballo
Fresh Meat: Jackie Singh
Alan Michael White Opsec Fail Award: @Itsnatsutalbott

 

[Weeb Slinger]

I voted for Rekieta as Lolcow of the Year. An astonishing descent into rank debauchery that deserves recognition.

Best Internet Famous & Grift Wars Lolcow: Gonzalo Lira / Coach Red Pill
Fresh Meat: Drexel Johnson-Yarbrough / Drex
Best Put to Pasture Lolcow: David Stay / Mandarr / Stayte of Mind
Best Lolcow Media: Boogie vs Wings

 

[Winkelhaid]

Best Mai Forum Lolcow: Josh Saunders
Best Internet Famous & Grift Wars Lolcow: Gonzalo Lira
Fresh Meat: Jackie Singh
Best Lolcow Media: Cyraxx's Arrest

 

[306h4Ge5eJUJ]

Best Main Forum Lolcow: Patrick Sean Tomlinson / Stealthygeek
Queen of the Beauty Parlour: Aella Martin / Rachael Antier Slick
Fresh Meat: Jackie Singh / hackingbutlegal
Alan Michael White Opsec Fail Award: @Chaser663
Best Lolcow Media: Jesus Christ Chan Sonichu Prime Resurrected and Returned

 

[Safir]

DECEMBER SURPRISE
i'm sorry patbros, in light of recent revelations i have to change my voot to nick
happy new year everyone! happy new year nick! what an ebic conclusion, much better than hunter's laptop

 

[felted]

Best Main Forum Lolcow: Daniel Larson
Best Animal Control Lolcow: Caden Wayne "Jade" Scholeck / bluefolf
Best Put To Pasture Lolcow: David Stay / Mandarr / Stayte of Mind (PBUH)

I have voted for Bossmanjack to win the 2023 Lolcow of the Year award. A toast to a great 2023, and a hope for 2024 to be even greater.

 

[Nitro!]

Lolcow of the Year: Austin Curtis Peterson / bossmanjack DTPN !!

Best Main Forum Lolcow: Jack Scalfani / Cooking With Jack
Best Internet Famous & Grift Wars Lolcow: Jean-Francois Gariepy / JFG
Best Put to Pasture Lolcow: Fred L. "Bubba" Copeland / Brittini Blaire Summerlin

Alan Michael White Opsec Fail Award: SamanthaPrater
Best Lolcow Media: Dream vs Nicolas Cantu[/ispoiler][/ispoiler]

 

[Local Wordmason]

Best Internet Famous & Grift Wars Lolcow: Boogie2988
Fresh Meat: Jackie Singh
Queen of the Beauty Parlor: Anisa Johma
Best Lolcow Media: Jesus Christ Chan Sonichu Prime Resurrected and Returned

 

[Mesosalpinx]

Queen of the Beauty Parlour: Illuminaughtii
Best Animal Control Lolcow: Frederik
Best Internet Famous & Grift Wars Lolcow: Boogie
Best Lolcow Media: Dream vs Nicolas Cantu

 

[Seething Troon Collector]

I don't feel so good bros. Crackhead Austin is never going to get that Honda Civic now. Seriously, I can't fucking believe it. Rekieta came in right at the end of the year with what is possibly the dumbest thing I've ever seen him do. Congratulations Nick! You've truly earned the esteemed title of LOTY.

I humbly request that this amazing clip be played at your acceptance speech before you take up the mantle:

 

[Peaches the Wonder Cat]

Breaker of Scales: Chantal Sarault / Chantal al-Refae / Foodie Beauty
Best Internet Famous & Grift Wars Lolcow: Steven Jason Williams / Boogie2988
Fresh Meat: Hannah Pearl Davis / justpearlythingz
Best Lolcow Media:Jesus Christ Chan Sonichu Prime Resurrected and Returned

 

[Londo]

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even fun and merriment on this website triggers retards

The seethe is so strong with this one.