Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

[Sneedfully and Peacefully]

I’ve always been so distracted by his bitch tits and dainty arms I’ve never noticed he’s eating what looks like two slabs of ham and a pretzel with a fucking fork and knife.

It looks like kassler rippchen, which is basically a smoked cut of pork loin/a chop. Not a ham but it can also be cured like one. Usually you have it with sauerkraut.

Based on the pretzel being slopped with it I'm going to go out on a limb and say that he asked for German mustard and did the ""fancy"" drizzles because that's what good eating looks like before throwing his phone at his wife-and-I's head and telling her to take a picture of him being posh and tucking in, not realizing he's got jowls and bitch tits on full display.

 

[Oxyjen]

She has a name you know.
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[FinnSven]

It's not a game of Axis and Allies where you can just "make more bombers." It's quite plausible Russia can't replace any lost Bears.

Axis and Allies? Fatrick likely gets all of his military knowledge from Command and Conquer and therefore genuinely believes that resources are gathered on the battlefield, during the battle, while critical infrastructure is also being built.

 

[Judge Holden]

It looks like kassler rippchen, which is basically a smoked cut of pork loin/a chop. Not a ham but it can also be cured like one. Usually you have it with sauerkraut.

Based on the pretzel being slopped with it I'm going to go out on a limb and say that he asked for German mustard and did the ""fancy"" drizzles because that's what good eating looks like before throwing his phone at his wife-and-I's head and telling her to take a picture of him being posh and tucking in, not realizing he's got jowls and bitch tits on full display.

 

[REGENDarySumanai]

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Prime for black babies.

 

[Anasûrimbor Kellhus]

Axis and Allies? Fatrick likely gets all of his military knowledge from Command and Conquer

Wrong in every delusional detail as always, stalker. We all know Patrick doesn't have the patience or intelligence needed to understand and play either of these games. His understanding of war came from bud lite commercials and the most upvooted reddit comments. Enjoy prison.

 

[Septic Tank Bomber]

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When was the last time he post his greasy ass selfie? Did he stop sharing them because he secretly aware how disgusting he looks?

 

[I'mThePatMan!]

*opens the thread expecting some retarded tweets and fat jokes*
*sees 3 pages with Nazis and Himmler pics*
OK, I guess my lunch will be entertaining.


Now, a semi-serious question for everyone who visits this thread, both Professional Patposters and simple weekend Patenjoyers alike:

The Patrick Non-Nazi related thought that brought me today is a reflection about Jenny's actual popularity here in KF, and I'd like to hear what you guys think:

1) Jen had a fantastic year, most of the regulars thought the award was in the bag. But Rickieta and BMJ came with the big guns, and I can't take that away from them. Specially in Rickieta's case, the man had a great stretch during the last few weeks.

2) But I can't deny that at least to some significant degree, BMJ and Rickieta's numbers derive a lot from their personal connection to Null and the much much better advertisement Rats/Rickieta's Posters did compared to us (Sorry Patrick, we let you down).

3) Patrick on the other hand, not only did not have that kind of exposure, one could argue he was actually "sabotaged" in a way, considering how much Null hates the Pests and actively goes out of his way to not talk about Patrick unless it is something EXCEPTIONALLY funny. Being that MATI has thousands of listeners, I'd say that was a huge factor in the end.

4) Therefore, to me, Pat's sucess just feels more organic, ie., the quality of the product and word of mouth was the real seller, not the ads.


(Fine, maybe we had one VERY dedicated advertiser/reporter)

5) Which got me thinking and brings me to my questions to you: among hundreds of lolcows, Patrick still managed to stand out big time, without almost any help (I'm not counting the Pests as help because they're an integral part of what makes Pat... Pat). So:

A - How do you think Pat would have fared without the other's external help? I'm not disputing he lost, but I'm asking you if we could (as an experimental thought) analyze only the quality of the product itself, where do you see Pat? Still 3rd place? 1st? Maybe top 3 lolcows of all time? I'm too partial to answer, but I'd love to hear other, more experienced lolcow watcher's takes.

B - Considering the above, what does the future hold for Pat? To keep the analogy going a little further, I'd say personally I think while an average/good product with great ads can sustain itself for some time, it eventually fades away. While a truly unique, fantastic product usually resists the test of time and has a great chance to be enjoyed by many generations.

What do guys think?

Thanks for coming to my PATtalk. There will be free Pepperoni at the end of the hall.

 

[WelperHelper99]

Axis and Allies? Fatrick likely gets all of his military knowledge from Command and Conquer and therefore genuinely believes that resources are gathered on the battlefield, during the battle, while critical infrastructure is also being built.

Is Patrick even smart enough for Command and Conquer? He'd actually have to use keyboard commands and we fucking know he doesn't know how copy/paste works

 

[CoolSixtyNiner]

Patty is sounding more and more like Eric the Midget with his tweets. You can say anything to Fatty and he has to reply.

Second time today I read Eric the Midgets name. I have a torrent somewhere of the entire ETM arc, from Kelly Clarkson to that fake gangster to his death. I would love to hear an extended argument between Fatrick and ETM. Maybe I can train a genai chatbot on both of them and just have them argue with each other.

 

[McMitch]

@I’mThePatMan!
A - Fatrick is a victim of timing more than anything. I think he still organically would end up in third, because the timing of Rekeita’s catfish would have spread organically through the site anyway. Considering Rekeita took first before null posted about it in the Featured Content. Fatrick hit his peak for the year way earlier, without another big push during the Christmas season.

B - Fatrick will probably enter his famine stage regarding content (we know he’s always in the feast stage for stuffing his fat gullet). Unless he tries another retarded lawsuit, he’ll probably just fall into a routine of bitching on Xitter. The book release willl be a nice little bump, but I think this is the last piece of “””literature””” we’ll see from him.

 

[Judge Holden]

Patty is sounding more and more like Eric the Midget with his tweets. You can say anything to Fatty and he has to reply.

As shown by his most recent xeet where a new crime is revealed.

FELONY JENNY-NAMING

 

[Sneedfully and Peacefully]

This is just a repeat of people calling him Rick. I think it's his ego doing this (naturally) because he wants to be heard or known as Patrick S Tomlinson. If you recall the recording he stated his name to the cops which ya know makes sense, but he exacerbates it by going "yes my name is Patrick S Tomlinson that's me that's who I am" or something along the lines, combined with his DOYOUHAVEANYIDEA and other outbursts about how they haven't listened to him, he wants to make sure everyone knows who he is, and what he's done, because he's God's gift.

All that being said I think some autistic and/or retarded part of his fucked up brain might think people will actually start believing his name is Jennifer and all his illustrious goodwill and accomplishments will be misattributed and it's a grave infraction against him.

ETA: I can technicality Tomlinson you too Fatrick. Your name is not and has not only been Patrick, it's always been Patrick Sean Tomlinson. Your mother picked at least two of those and you inherited the third one because she decided to shack up with a professional bull blower.

Enjoy surname.

 

[Maude Snew]

It looks like kassler rippchen, which is basically a smoked cut of pork loin/a chop. Not a ham but it can also be cured like one. Usually you have it with sauerkraut.

Based on the pretzel being slopped with it I'm going to go out on a limb and say that he asked for German mustard and did the ""fancy"" drizzles because that's what good eating looks like before throwing his phone at his wife-and-I's head and telling her to take a picture of him being posh and tucking in, not realizing he's got jowls and bitch tits on full display.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leberk%C3%A4se

Not something you'd usually get at a sit down restaurant, more something you'd pick up from a food truck as a sandwich with some mustard. There's tons of variants and it's all pretty good, he's just being weird and fat about it eating it at a restaurant.

 

[Judge Holden]

I love how pig of pig proudly takes ownership of the fact he is the most pathetic excuse of a manlet in the entire midwest

 

[Black Man Underwear]

I love how pig of pig proudly takes ownership of the fact he is the most pathetic excuse of a manlet in the entire midwest
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It would be funny if he ends up convicted of some kind of fraud in the 5 or so years. All of the seething and hundreds of posts saying "enjoy prison" just to be incarcerated himself.

 

[rusty shackleford 1]

I love how pig of pig proudly takes ownership of the fact he is the most pathetic excuse of a manlet in the entire midwest
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Ok this is it, this is the one. My favorite pig tweet. This faggot is now insTrucTing random tweeters to just lay face down on the floor and wait for the knock. The secondhand embarrassment I felt reading that tweet and his terse confirmation that he was, in fact, being serious, it’s art.
Edit:

Lol he’s still dreaming of revenge, facilitating death is obviously comparable to calling him fat.

 

[Sneedfully and Peacefully]

I love how pig of pig proudly takes ownership of the fact he is the most pathetic excuse of a manlet in the entire midwest
View attachment 5608756

Lie face down* fucking professional author here folks.

 

[Jeff_the_Thriller]

I bet someone could make a fantastic Pat in Disco Elysium... Might try at some point.

I know what I'm doing tonight.

When was the last time he post his greasy ass selfie? Did he stop sharing them because he secretly aware how disgusting he looks?

He absolutely knows he's a gross, bloated, red faced pig man. That's why he won't use a new headshot for his author picture that got the copyright bought. Every picture of him is mocked relentlessly. He sure as shit won't post a recent picture. His misplaced pride won't allow it.

Is Patrick even smart enough for Command and Conquer? He'd actually have to use keyboard commands and we fucking know he doesn't know how copy/paste works

With all the gay nerd shit Patrick is into, he doesn't mention games at all. I think he is far too stupid for most games except for the most hand holding, minimum input gameplay experiences. I could definitely see him fanboying for some poorly written interactive cutscene like Forspoken or new God of War.

 

[Waifu Days]

Second time today I read Eric the Midgets name. I have a torrent somewhere of the entire ETM arc, from Kelly Clarkson to that fake gangster to his death. I would love to hear an extended argument between Fatrick and ETM. Maybe I can train a genai chatbot on both of them and just have them argue with each other.

A true meeting of the minds. It would devolve into gross noises and massive bannings.