Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

[keke]

Nick is way too comfortable in forgetting this, he needs to be reminded constantly about his failures in the Vic case otherwise he dares raise those putrid atrophied shoulders inch by inch.

A couple of relevant comments from the latest Elissa clip. It’s gimp Nick with his daddydom Dick Masterson obsessing over Eric July again and shitting on Eric’s lawyers

 

[Mr.Bucket]

Larry Correria

Larry is a cool guy. I bought a gun from him back when he used to own a gun shop called Fuzzy Bunny Movie Guns.

 

[Dr. Butt]

However, according to some post Rekieta made that I did a forum search for and obviously couldn't find, he goes through a personality change every 3 years and thus by 2026, he should undergo another metamorphosis. Hopefully one that doesn't drink and drive or do drugs.

Rekietroon 2026

 

[Rodeo Roadrunner]

>10% body fat
How delusional. He's not even close to 10%, he's around 20%. Dunning-Kruger effect in action.
To put it in perspective, such low body fat would mean he would have to be leaner than ~99.9% of Americans. This is not sustainable even for some fitness models, due to just how clean the diet has to be and how taxing it is to maintain it for prolonged periods of time (both phisically and mentally). All the alcohol he drinks on its own makes it impossible for him to drop that low. Just compare side by side to what 10% body fat actually looks like.
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Exactly. At 10% body fat, the only way you don't have visible musculature is if you have no muscles. You can not work out at all and have visible abs at 10% body fat.

 

[Captain Manning]

Nick is way too comfortable in forgetting this, he needs to be reminded constantly about his failures in the Vic case otherwise he dares raise those putrid atrophied shoulders inch by inch.
View attachment 5651673
A couple of relevant comments from the latest Elissa clip. It’s gimp Nick with his daddydom Dick Masterson obsessing over Eric July again and shitting on Eric’s lawyers

View attachment 5651674

Nick recommended Ty, but it was Ty that ended up fucking everything up.

Realistically, once Ty became Nick's official attorney of record, every single fuckup became one that Ty has to own. I'm sure @AnOminous and/or @TherapyMan would back me in that conclusion.

I think the Vic thing is now actually the weakest criticism to lay at Nick's feet. He's done way stupider shit since then.

 

[Strix454]

An Elissa Clips. Nick and Dax talking about gay stuff and how gay they are. And apparently Doug TenNapel has incredibly funny private heart to heart conversations about homosexuals and homosexuality with Dax. I'm starting to think Doug's whole christian family man thing is as fake as Nick's was.

If Nick is sober and talking like this, drinking is far from his only problem.

 

[Captain Manning]

An Elissa Clips. Nick and Dax talking about gay stuff and how gay they are. And apparently Doug TenNapel has incredibly funny private heart to heart conversations about homosexuals and homosexuality with Dax. I'm starting to think Doug's whole christian family man thing is as fake as Nick's was.

If Nick is sober and talking like this, drinking is far from his only problem.

Maybe Doug was a closeted self-loathing homosexual, and despite his storied struggle session with EVS over "teh gays" so many years ago, he's since come to terms with his sexuality.

Hey, come to think of it... you know what this reminds me of?

American Beauty.

Have you ever seen American Beauty Strix?

 

[Punished Brent]

An Elissa Clips. Nick and Dax talking about gay stuff and how gay they are. And apparently Doug TenNapel has incredibly funny private heart to heart conversations about homosexuals and homosexuality with Dax. I'm starting to think Doug's whole christian family man thing is as fake as Nick's was.

If Nick is sober and talking like this, drinking is far from his only problem.

He has to be having weird marriage problems behind the scenes. He keeps coming out with these really weird things that he uses as some sort of cope about how he is still attracted or in love with his wife. it feels forced

 

[The Snail]

An Elissa Clips. Nick and Dax talking about gay stuff and how gay they are. And apparently Doug TenNapel has incredibly funny private heart to heart conversations about homosexuals and homosexuality with Dax. I'm starting to think Doug's whole christian family man thing is as fake as Nick's was.

If Nick is sober and talking like this, drinking is far from his only problem.

This has to be the most bizarre clip in a while. It hurts my head trying to follow their line of thought. Is this a joke?

 

[Dr. Butt]

He said people talk about all his holidays, but most of his trips are for work or family and not proper holiday.

I guess being with your family on holiday doesn't count as a holiday for a trad and honest conservative.

 

[Neetorino]

I guess being with your family on holiday doesn't count as a holiday for a trad and honest conservative.

Obviously! Can you imagine how much of a hassle swinging must be if the kids or grandparents are around? And honestly, it'd be way better for Nick if he could just leave the wife at home, but last time he did that he was roofied and probably diddled. It might be "a thrill" for him, but clearly she doesn't find him "swinging alone" very fair.

 

[Mr.Bucket]

He said people talk about all his holidays, but most of his trips are for work or family and not proper holiday.

That's freaking hilarious. This dude hasn't worked in like a decade or more.

 

[Dr. Butt]

This thread gets borderline unreadable with the retarded shit you guys start talking about when Balldo isn't being entertaining. Take it to a fucking cooking thread, jfc.

Shh. I need more baking advice from the guy who uses a "bread machine".

 

[Balldo's Gate]

What a thoughtful gift!

I remembered to start the log later than normal but well before the stream started. YT took in 20x what rumble did and that was only $118. $3 an hour for a 3rd of his normal viewers. No charts as they just don't matter when you get 2 rumble rants.

Nick's reaching the point where Ralph is running laps around him on the Rumble Rant front. When does Ethan get a contract?

 

[holyhandgrenade]

An Elissa Clips. Nick and Dax talking about gay stuff and how gay they are. And apparently Doug TenNapel has incredibly funny private heart to heart conversations about homosexuals and homosexuality with Dax. I'm starting to think Doug's whole christian family man thing is as fake as Nick's was.

If Nick is sober and talking like this, drinking is far from his only problem.

There's no way there isn't alcohol in that monster can.

 

[Retink Retunk]

What a thoughtful gift!

So that's who Balldo had to fuck to get his stand up time slot.

 

[Pippa's Greasy KB]

Our wife is so silent and invisible now that it's almost too weird. She went from just random voice popping out talking to him on stream to a couple special stream appearance, to a somewhat often appearance to ass pics in locals and planning for her own channel and then to just photos from an event months ago looking like a completely different freak and then nothing!

Nick, I demand to know what's up. She's OUR wife! You better not mama jf her Nick!

 

[SpergioLeonne]

He has to be having weird marriage problems behind the scenes. He keeps coming out with these really weird things that he uses as some sort of cope about how he is still attracted or in love with his wife. it feels forced

He hopes she makes a million dollars

 

[A Very Big Fish]

Maybe Doug was a closeted self-loathing homosexual, and despite his storied struggle session with EVS over "teh gays" so many years ago, he's since come to terms with his sexuality.

Hey, come to think of it... you know what this reminds me of?

American Beauty.

Have you ever seen American Beauty Strix?

Does that mean Doug is going to be the one to waste Nick after Nick finally decides to do the right thing and not bang a teenager?

 

[VeteranOfTheRetardWars]

I'll be real, I really just play catch-up occasionally with Nick because it's weirdly depressing. I did like the guy way back when, and even if I didn't watch most of his stuff I rooted for him. But man, that fucking booze ravaged him, and seeing it happen in real time is honestly sad.

>10% body fat
How delusional. He's not even close to 10%, he's around 20%. Dunning-Kruger effect in action.
To put it in perspective, such low body fat would mean he would have to be leaner than ~99.9% of Americans. This is not sustainable even for some fitness models, due to just how clean the diet has to be and how taxing it is to maintain it for prolonged periods of time (both phisically and mentally). All the alcohol he drinks on its own makes it impossible for him to drop that low. Just compare side by side to what 10% body fat actually looks like.
View attachment 5651614View attachment 5651615

Slight PL, but I had an electrical resistance BFP thing and it said I was 6.5% bodyfat. I have never been that lean in my life, and I likely never will because it would be horrible to lose that much fat. I'm lean, but not that lean.
Nick is actually low bodyfat. He simply has no real muscle to pop through his layer of fat. I would eyeball ~13%, it's always hard to tell without a bunch of measurements to go on. He's just skinny AF, and if you've seen chronicly heavy drinkers that is sometimes common. If you, as an effect of your drinking, go without food all day and just drink the majority of your calories, you could still be in a calorie deficit. Nurses can also tell you, severe alcoholics can be super super skinny.