Bossman Austin Curtis Peterson / BossmanJack / AustinGambles / Austin_07 / irondollah - Gambling addict, convicted felon, scammer, and raging manchild that hates his fucking life, FAKE MONEY

[BMO_]

Dooooood this lewlcow should be imprisoned!

Lack of content during Chris-Chan's Jail Saga should tell you why this isn't fun.

 

[break these cuffs]

I understand you're not frustrated as you didn't ever have to pay taxes due to not working you're probably as much of a lowlife person as Lossman

Anyone who's ever had to engage with the IRS beyond them telling you that you don't make enough at your part time job to pay taxes understands that they're a worthless bureaucracy that should be torn down. Weaponizing them makes you a subhuman.

 

[AnOminous]

Anyone who's ever had to engage with the IRS beyond them telling you that you don't make enough at your part time job to pay taxes understands that they're a worthless bureaucracy that should be torn down. Weaponizing them makes you a subhuman.

While I'd make an exception for charity frauds and child molesters, pretty much.

 

[Boglim Enthusiast]

I may just be an untalented rat but....


Damn That Pussy Nice.

 

[Chirping Smoke Detector]

I'm not sure if this has been posted but I ran across this:

 

[Kees H]

Austin gets felted on Dice, and of course, the poor headphones get abused again. He won't stop until all headphones are eradicated from Planet Earth. Sad. In the process he calls his sponsor rigged as well.

Spoiler: Total Headphone Death presented in Crack-o-Vision (cropped cam)

 

[Precious Bodily Fluids]

My understanding is that there's no chance to win big at Dice, in that you will always win or lose the same amount depending on the settings. So if you just keeping pressing butan to make neuron activate like a chimp, then the house edge means you're guaranteed to lose everything after a while. There isn't even the faint chance of hitting a jackpot because there isn't one. Is that right? It doesn't have to be rigged this is the expected outcome every time based on publicly available knowledge.

I've occasionally seen him get juiced and throw the entire amount into a Dice roll and immediately double his winnings. Then he take the money and goes to a different game for a while. That seems like the only rational way to play Dice and he does that sometimes, but eventually he comes back to Dice to lose it all. It's like he doesn't understand that there's a house edge when he goes to dice to "climb".

 

[Woggly Wand Wizard]

There isn't even the faint chance of hitting a jackpot because there isn't one. Is that right?

The dice jackpot is hitting a hot streak. That's what he's hoping for.

There's a house edge to everything. The one on dice doesn't seem that bad. It's better than roulette.

 

[N Space]

You can find out if a person does their own research or just inherits their opinions from others in literally 3 seconds if you ask them how they feel about Kiwifarms

To be fair, the vast majority of people will say they've never heard of KF.

 

[Boglim Enthusiast]

in that you will always win or lose the same amount depending on the settings. So if you just keeping pressing butan to make neuron activate like a chimp

He plays at a 49.5% chance so it's pretty much as close to a pure coinflip as they can make it well still calling it a game.

So while that should be pretty close in win rates the house all things considered edge out a small lead the longer run.

The dice jackpot is hitting a hot streak. That's what he's hoping for.

Yeah pretty much you can see it when he streaks wins he's yelling instantly, with losses he's clenching his jaw and rubbing his head like a strung-out dope fiend. Either way he's getting an intense emotional reaction by cutting out the middle main and just playing pure games of chance with as much as he can on the line.

Are Stake originals a parallel for gambling addicts and drug users main lining for more immediate relief?

 

[internet friend]

Each time he moves to a new game, I keep thinking "it can't get lower than this", and each time it does. I thought keno was bad, until I saw mines. I thought mines was bad, until I saw dice. What's the end game? Just a button and it instantly shows text saying WIN or LOSE?

 

[PositiveMonk]

Each time he moves to a new game, I keep thinking "it can't get lower than this", and each time it does. I thought keno was bad, until I saw mines. I thought mines was bad, until I saw dice. What's the end game? Just a button and it instantly shows text saying WIN or LOSE?

You're describing limbo

Also here's some stuff from the monkey session the other day. The thing I love about when he's on monkey is that he ALWAYS hovers over skip if it's a white person. But if it's a nigger, he's excited to chat.

I liked this audio clip out of context

Bossman gets linked up with a rat on monkey. They beat their chests at each other.

Austin matches with some young ladies and immediately goes from 0 to creep. When the girls ask what happened to his wall he starts doing his usual bit about fucking against the wall but for once it's not their mom. For some reason I find it amusing that he still goes to that same script just with a slight tweak.

 

[Flaming Dumpster]

Paging @Kees H

Bossman Word of the Day: Riggery

Edit: He just went live and is complaining his headphones are dead now.
Edit edit: He had to ask chat if he smashed them. Reckons he was gentle then spent at least 5 mins troubleshooting until a chatter told him how to fix it.

 

[Vibe_Guy]

Bossman gets linked up with a rat on monkey. They beat their chests at each other.

Beat chests? My guy. Austin WON over that RAT!
Rats-0
BMJ- 35678293

 

[Chirping Smoke Detector]

He plays at a 49.5% chance so it's pretty much as close to a pure coinflip as they can make it well still calling it a game.

Which is funny because other games he plays at high risk to increase his payout. It is a bit surprising he's kept dice at a coin flip.

Bossman gets linked up with a rat on monkey. They beat their chests at each other.

You shouldn't smoke crack from a woman's pussy, Austin. That's probably where that nasty cough is coming from.

Austin matches with some young ladies and immediately goes from 0 to creep. When the girls ask what happened to his wall he starts doing his usual bit about fucking against the wall but for once it's not their mom. For some reason I find it amusing that he still goes to that same script just with a slight tweak.

"Girls make me nervous" and that's why bossman sticks with the rat moms. DAMN THAT PUSSY NICE.

 

[break these cuffs]

"Girls make me nervous"

He should try dudes then. A bi-curious Austin arc would be hilarious.

 

[WelperHelper99]

He should try dudes then. A bi-curious Austin arc would be hilarious.

I mean he doesn't hate gays, the potential is definitely there for some memes

 

[MadStan]

What Austin perceives as success with subs and a growing viewership is merely the intended actions of others who benefit from his popularity and streams.

Being a streamer and making money means you have craft; being a streamer and making everyone else something while you have nothing makes you a monkey.

They know how their monkey dances.

 

[WelperHelper99]

Paging @Kees H
View attachment 5662145
Bossman Word of the Day: Riggery

Edit: He just went live and is complaining his headphones are dead now.
Edit edit: He had to ask chat if he smashed them. Reckons he was gentle then spent at least 5 mins troubleshooting until a chatter told him how to fix it.

Riggery needs to be added to all dictionaries. Rizz is apparently a word, so to balance this out, I vote for riggery to be added

 

[TTD = Total Tarkov Death]

I mean he doesn't hate gays, the potential is definitely there for some memes

I think he only ‘doesn’t hate gays’ in the sense that he apologizes for saying faggot out of fear of cancellation.