Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

[Spaded Dave]

A new excuse has dropped:

RekietaLaw​

Wheee. Working on being on time...gonna fail...Makin lady r ramen

The arduous task of boiling water has foiled Rekietas plans yet again.

 

[Himedall All-seeing Waifu]

Well that clip of drugged up Nick opining on KF vs. Epik without doing any show prep was good for one thing: Confirming that Nick is pushing himself to do a “professional” show where he talks as if he’s reading from a script.

It’s almost as if he’s afraid another month of his post-Rumble contract life is about to pass and TPTB don’t seem to even know he’s alive.

But it hasn't lapsed. A social media expert told me so! We can't possibly understand all the intricate and unique facets of being a 'Creator'. If you think you do, then you might be a Scandanavian prude.

The fact that Rumble isn't picking up the phone is really starting to sink in and he's clawing at this in an attempt to get his titanic aiming away from the icebergs even as multiple sections are already flooding.

He thinks this going to let him finally get to dunk on kiwifarms effectively in a way with plausible deniability of still wanting to be friends with Josh.

I am not 100% convinced he is being ignored ot will not get a contract. He went silent about things for 45-60 days before signing thr first time. I am leaning more in that direction, however... It would be funny if Rumble was sweating him out to offer a cheaper deal.

I would wait until February 15th or so to start seriously considering it if he has not yet mentioned a trip to Florida to start saying that we have passed the 50% probability mark.

 

[Tubby Aardvark]

The arduous task of boiling water has foiled Rekietas plans yet again.

Can she not microwave her own Ramen? I know she can't figure out a stove but my god, put it in for 4 minutes and you got some ramen noodles.

 

[WelperHelper99]

The arduous task of boiling water has foiled Rekietas plans yet again.

If you can't cook Ramen or think its hard.... I don't want to know you. It's the easiest shit, so easy they even make cup versions.

 

[holyhandgrenade]

Can she not microwave her own Ramen? I know she can't figure out a stove but my god, put it in for 4 minutes and you got some ramen noodles.

No you see this is artisanal ramen sourced directly from the Ramen region of China you wouldn't get it you incel prude poor

 

[Chirping Smoke Detector]

Why does nick keep touching his face? Is he just sitting in his chair arms crossed?

He has said before that the drugs he took during the first Hedonism II vacation changed his sense of touch. He started rubbing his face a lot after that trip. So much so that it was pointed out and we got the explanation.

Why would anyone take advice on defamation from a failed lawyer who is so half-witted that he's having to spend hundreds of thou defending himself in a case where insisted that somebody likes to suck little boy's dicks?

Not just a lawyer who is involved in their own defamation case but someone who has an obvious axe to grind against one of the parties he's talking about. Being confrontational toward a potential lawsuit is actually a good thing, you would want a lawyer to try and poke holes in it so you knew where the weaknesses were. But, balldoman isn't doing it in good faith so any of his criticisms should be ignored.

AussieOverLawd​

Still not a great look for Josh if it comes out during discrovery that CP was on the site

This dude got made fun of 1 time on here and has not gotten over it.

 

[Spaded Dave]

Can she not microwave her own Ramen? I know she can't figure out a stove but my god, put it in for 4 minutes and you got some ramen noodles.

If you can't cook Ramen or think its hard.... I don't want to know you. It's the easiest shit, so easy they even make cup versions.

Have we considered the possibility that the medications she's on have made her literally retarded?

 

[WelperHelper99]

Have we considered the possibility that the medications she's on have made her literally retarded?

I mean... that's a lot of drugs if you can't boil a pack of Ramen. Totally possible though.

 

[Anticipointment]

He has said before that the drugs he took during the first Hedonism II vacation changed his sense of touch. He started rubbing his face a lot after that trip. So much so that it was pointed out and we got the explanation.

This has got to be cope for whatever drugs he’s currently taking. Never heard of a person taking trippy drugs on vacay & it turned them into a flailing faggot who can’t stop flopping in their chair, while feeling up their own face & making the most smugly punchable expressions ever seen.

 

[Maude Snew]

I think I can safely say that if you knew absolutely nothing about what's going on between Epik LLC and the Farms, and then you listened to Nick's freezing cold take, you'd know even less afterwards.

Nick Rekieta lawsplaining the Internet to his fans, ca.2024, colorized

 

[John Andrews Stan]

By Nick’s own admission he subsists mostly on bourbon, Doritos, Snickers and ramen. He doesn’t appear to do any exercise whatsoever. Between that, not sleeping, popping pills to “get straight” enough to drive (at 7AM after knocking back shots until 5AM), and chugging Monster instead of water, Nick lives like he has a death wish. Yet he is puzzled why anybody thinks he’s anything less than thriving and living his best life.

Nick’s body is a crime scene and he’s the perp. His blood work must be hilariously bad. What a trashbox.

 

[Pomniman]

Have we considered the possibility that the medications she's on have made her literally retarded?

I think it's just that the Rekieta household is full of lazy niggers, is all. Them both being stereotypical suburban prescription addicts is more a symptom than a cause of this as far as I see it. The kinds of people who look to pills to solve all their problems in life are also the kinds of people who are too lazy to cook a meal.

 

[Catgirl Tyranid]

The arduous task of boiling water has foiled Rekietas plans yet again.

Remember when Nick used to pretend that he cooked extravagant meals for his family? Remember when he would do "cooking streams" for it to just be Ramen with whisky added? Kiwifarms remembers.

Serious question: Back when Nick did his cooking streams, were any of them NOT ramen? Anything to prove he was capable of cooking anything semi-complex before he "improved" his life with Molly and Gay90s Underwear parties and his ability to do anything competently took a nose dive?

 

[Gorton Colu]

I think it's just that the Rekieta household is full of lazy niggers, is all. Them both being stereotypical suburban prescription addicts is more a symptom than a cause of this as far as I see it. The kinds of people who look to pills to solve all their problems in life are also the kinds of people who are too lazy to cook a meal.

It just doesn't make sense why they try to pretend otherwise. It's obvious that they are wrecks to anyone who is paying attention. Nick's supporters are not going to leave him now at this point if he just cops to being an addict.

Perhaps he is just trying to decieve himself. It's clearly failing.

 

[Pomniman]

It just doesn't make sense why they try to pretend otherwise. It's obvious that they are wrecks to anyone who is paying attention. Nick's supporters are not going to leave him now at this point if he just cops to being an addict.

Perhaps he is just trying to decieve himself. It's clearly failing.

They say hope is the last thing to die, but judging by how much his alcoholism has ramped up I don't think he's even fooling himself anymore no matter how hard he tries to put on a smug face for the ay-lawgz. It's very ralphamalésque.

 

[AnOminous]

I am not 100% convinced he is being ignored ot will not get a contract. He went silent about things for 45-60 days before signing thr first time. I am leaning more in that direction, however... It would be funny if Rumble was sweating him out to offer a cheaper deal.

Premature gloating isn't really going to earn us any brownie points anyway. It could be anything. He could be so arrogant he's just assuming they have to come to him. Anyway if he gets anything at all he'll gloat about it even if it completely sucks and angrily eat single Doritos at the Farms. You'll only be able to tell from his visible seething.

He has said before that the drugs he took during the first Hedonism II vacation changed his sense of touch. He started rubbing his face a lot after that trip. So much so that it was pointed out and we got the explanation.

What a load of Rekieta. If something changes your basic neurosensory behavior in middle age that's fuckin' brain damage. Or, more likely, druggie bullshit.

Personally I'm sticking with his lying getting worse as he continues to engage in addict behavior, which is to say lying sack of shit behavior, and needed an excuse for what is one of the hallmark liar's tells, constantly touching your face.

 

[Maude Snew]

Premature gloating isn't really going to earn us any brownie points anyway. It could be anything. He could be so arrogant he's just assuming they have to come to him. Anyway if he gets anything at all he'll gloat about it even if it completely sucks and angrily eat single Doritos at the Farms. You'll only be able to tell from his visible seething.

One would assume he'd have to downgrade his snacks so he wouldn't be seething eating Doritos he's be seething eating great value brand authentic triangles or whatever. The brand name snacks would be reserved for the bulls.

 

[Some Badger]

By Nick’s own admission he subsists mostly on bourbon, Doritos, Snickers and ramen. He doesn’t appear to do any exercise whatsoever. Between that, not sleeping, popping pills to “get straight” enough to drive (at 7AM after knocking back shots until 5AM), and chugging Monster instead of water, Nick lives like he has a death wish. Yet he is puzzled why anybody thinks he’s anything less than thriving and living his best life.

Nick’s body is a crime scene and he’s the perp. His blood work must be hilariously bad. What a trashbox.

With a lifestyle like that at his age, it’s kind of surprising he’s nowhere near as fat as Ralph… yet.

 

[Dixieland Buckaroo]

Serious question: Back when Nick did his cooking streams, were any of them NOT ramen? Anything to prove he was capable of cooking anything semi-complex before he "improved" his life with Molly and Gay90s Underwear parties and his ability to do anything competently took a nose dive?

I don't even know if the archives exist that I could check, but I seem to recall him grilling a few times. I feel like he bought a big expensive grill for outside, and then did some stovetop "grilling" as well. This was pre-COVID.

 

[AnOminous]

With a lifestyle like that at his age, it’s kind of surprising he’s nowhere near as fat as Ralph… yet.

He's admitted he's deliberately developed manorexia and barely eats any calories, supposedly to maintain his weight despite getting most of his calories from booze. And of course he doesn't realize it's blindingly obvious (to everyone but him) it's to get even drunker from constantly drinking on an empty stomach, that is to say, again, classic alkie downward spiral behavior.