Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

[polar bear]

Kayla told a bizarre story involving a masseur touching her breasts which made her so uncomfortable that she went back two more times. Not a lot more to it, but included here for posterity.

This happened at the time when Kayla was trying to get pregnant with their 2nd child, and because she was on fertility drugs, Kayla was able to decline on subsequent visits (because she had already paid for them) due to her sensitive chest. Kayla claims she didn't relate the story to Nick until a year later.

You know, I always thought that this massage story is rather significant, because Kayla couldn't get pregnant until that guy groped her, which is very funny because it makes that animal abuser Rekieta a cuck extreme.
I bet that Mr Skunk fathered all of his many children, and was a distinguished member of skunk community, and is still dearly missed. Sth that Nick will never have.

 

[1 other person]

Nick is such an effeminate faggot even Babish could rape him.

 

[The FedEx Pope]

There's been some debate over whether Balldo stole Lolcow of the Year from Bossman Jack. While I absolutely love Bossman Jack no I think 2024 is Austin's year. Nick's self destruction is a tragic thing. Just look at what happened in 6 years.
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Now of course it's totally unfair of me to compare a 6 year time gap. But I bet Nick looked way better just a year ago compared to how he looks today. Fucking retard went from looking 38 and now looks 59. Time for Alcoholics Anonymous Nick!

Holy fuck, this is probably the best-worst comparison photo I've seen of Rackets. 6 years too? Nick get on chemotherapy, it's not too late

 

[Not Even Twice]

I honestly thought the skunk and racoon story would turn out to be one of those "rumors that turned into facts" on the farms, but nope there he is telling this story with a big old smile on his face.
Keep this up Nick and you can get a guest spot over in the ugliest and most nasty part of the farms, along with the other zoosadists.

 

[Me262PrinceOfTurboJet]

They're so mild mannered unless you're really trying to fuck with them, they know humans aren't their natural predators I ran into one in the forest just a few weeks ago, we both startled each other - he lifted up his tail and I threw up my arms and we stared at each other for a second, then we both took a step back and relaxed and went our separate ways. What a freak.

I don't understand why he just didn't open the cage door when he walked up to the cage to clip a leash on it to drag it to the pond.

 

[Anticipointment]

NICK. YOU ARE DYING. YOU ARE AN ALCOHOLIC AND YOU ARE KILLING YOURSELF. YOUR BODY IS DETERIORATING BEFORE OUR EYES. YOU ARE ONLY A FEW BENDERS AWAY FROM LATE-STAGE ALCOHOL POISONING. IF YOU DON'T STOP DRINKING YOUR WIFE WILL BE A WIDOW AND YOUR CHILD WILL BE AN ORPHAN.

Nick won’t be told what to do. If this is the eventual outcome, it may well be the best thing, for everyone involved.

 

[Balldo's Gate]

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This is worse than the sassily eating a Dorito clip. How is that possible?

 

[Smithfield Ham]

Nick won’t be told what to do. If this is the eventual outcome, it may well be the best thing, for everyone involved.

To be fair, "stop drinking" isn't his only option. Since he's a lawyer, I bet he could write up a pretty good will. He could even personalize it when heartfelt messages to his loved ones, to give them as much closure as possible and try to blunt the pain of him not being there to watch his kid grow up. Donate his liver to science so medical students can study sorosis.

 

[Sewer Rat]

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that skeletal dance reminded me of the schizo dances Terry Davis used to do

 

[Hyacinth Bucket (Bouquet)]

Re: Rackets talking about why he can't possibly stream because he needs to drive his kids to 6000 piano lessons.

He keeps referring to having lost one of the drivers in the house.

He refers to the nanny driving, his wife driving, and now he has to drive.

Let's overlook that it's an absolutely clusterfuck of bad planning that your four kids (one is in full time school) require three separate people to drive them around full time. But I think the extra driver was his son, and now the son isn't able to drive anymore.

 

[Goku 1000000 O]

I never paid attention to Kayla before, but holy fuck those clips of her talking about the meds and the mini-breakdown are terrifying.

I’d be having a mid-life crisis too if I was stuck with a wife who had all that bubbling underneath.

 

[zimzam88]

that skeletal dance reminded me of the schizo dances Terry Davis used to do

Balldo's dance is much gayer than any Terry Davis dance

 

[Smithfield Ham]

I never paid attention to Kayla before, but holy fuck those clips of her talking about the meds and the mini-breakdown are terrifying.

I’d be having a mid-life crisis too if I was stuck with a wife who had all that bubbling underneath.

Folie à deux isn't just the name of a Fall Out Boy album.

 

[Fully Eshay Skits Bruh V4]

Can we take bets somewhere about when Rackets will go to rehab?

Pumping all my coach coins into: NEVER.

 

[Howling Janny Dog]

Since he's a lawyer, I bet he could write up a pretty good will. He could even personalize it when heartfelt messages to his loved ones, to give them as much closure as possible and try to blunt the pain of him not being there to watch his kid grow up.

He fucking HATES his family. I wouldn't be surprised if he writes them out of his hypothetical will just to spite them. Besides, with his money coming from a trust fund, him blowing his youtube income on pointless trinkets, and that dastardly lawsuit brought upon him by the evil schizo anti-freeze peach man, what would he even have to leave behind? Empty liquor bottles?

 

[dustnight]

You know, I always thought that this massage story is rather significant, because Kayla couldn't get pregnant until that guy groped her, which is very funny because it makes that animal abuser Rekieta a cuck extreme.
I bet that Mr Skunk fathered all of his many children, and was a distinguished member of skunk community, and is still dearly missed. Sth that Nick will never have.

What if that 'worst day of his life' was finding out the kids weren't his?

 

[Smithfield Ham]

He fucking HATES his family. I wouldn't be surprised if he writes them out of his hypothetical will just to spite them. Besides, with his money coming from a trust fund, him blowing his youtube income on pointless trinkets, and that dastardly lawsuit brought upon him by the evil schizo anti-freeze peach man, what would he even have to leave behind? Empty liquor bottles?

Reminds me of a Married With Children joke. Al says "Bud, you're out of the will! ...wait, that's no punishment... Bud, you're in the will!"

Does he really hate his family, btw? I've only came into this thread somewhat recently and was only ever a casual Nick fan.

 

[Roboute Guilliman]

Do you have link to this clip for inclusion in the OP?

It was a long time ago sometime during weeb wars before the TCPA hearing. So I can't hope to figure out when. It was one of his "wink wink I would never do this wink wink" comments.

 

[AltisticRight]

Could even the best trained doctor keep a straight face if you asked them about shoving your testicles into your wife's anus?

>Shalom, Dick Likieta!
>Hi Dr. Goldberg, I would like to use The Balldo.
>Oy, balldo? Whatu goin on bout?
>It stands for Ball Dildo, they said if I had testicular injuries before, I cannot use it.
>...? (confused rabbi look)
>It is a device I strap onto my scrotum to insert into my wife, they said it will lead to a Ballgasm
>Oy vey this was the goyim into today?
>Don't be racist, Doc. Live and let live *shows balldosnek tattoo*
>Gaudy!
>Likieta, if you want testicular contortion, you shall use the Balldo. If you want a good and healthy life, you shall not use the Balldo.
>God bless! I shall use the Balldo.
>G-d* you gentile
>No don't use the Balldo... you will...
*Door's shut, Balldo exits with glee.*

 

[Chibitzen]

I am catching up on the thread. Holy shit it got busy.

Can anyone work out what this person is trying to say. I don't speak drug addict.

I had to stop to respond to this. Cgoody, you stupid fucking idiot.

Translation: "Nobody else has credibility anymore like my ecelebrity buddypal Rekieta... EXCEPT YOU, Sean!! Hi buddy! *wave*"

Cgoody, you are already looking for your next eceleb soul to leach upon like some kind of demonic hellspawn. As if either ever gave a fuck about you. You seriously haven't caught on how little Nick thinks of people like you who cling onto ecelebs to fill a void? What's next? You are going to ask for Sean's forgiveness on Rekieta's behalf. You dummy.