To these men it's never their disgusting personalities that keep them from getting a girlfriend. It's because of society and/or their appearance. Somehow to many of these men "feminazis" have upset the "natural order" where women are completely subservient to men. And independent women are the downfall of Western Civilization. When it comes to appearance sometimes it's something they can change themselves like being overweight or being scrawny but that requires work and self improvement. Something that an incel doesn't know. Other times they blame it on some other superficial appearance trait like baldness. And that no women will ever be attracted to them because they're bald.
I feel that is the root of the problem. Incels believe that courtship should be like something out of a fucking Shakespeare play. In their mind, these simple women should be fucking drenching their panties because this Supreme Gentleman approaches them, and speaking to them like an aristocrat from the 1600's.
What they fail to realize is that any sane woman is going to either see the man approaching her like that as completely out of his fucking mind, or more likely, they will see it for what it really is: A Facade. These guys talk a big game about how much of a gentleman they are, and how they are SO different from Chad, whose just looking to bury his cock in a warm hole. When in reality, they have the exact same goal as the mythical Thundercock. They're just as bad, if not worse.
My favorite excuse of theirs, however is, that they say it's not just about sex. They want "an emotional connection!", they want someone they can talk to. Yet, when a girl they hit on says she just wants to be friends, holy shit,they can't drop her fast enough (usually punctuated by called her a stuck-up, frigid bitch as well)
EDIT: Someone needs to convince these loveshys that there is literally no downside to having a platonic female friend. You get a friend, which is always a bonus, if they're a nice person, it helps you get used to being around women, and getting more comfortable with them. And hey! If you're lucky, she might one day set you up on a date with one of her friends because she thinks you're a great guy!