Funny stories about your period

[Aunt Carol]

If nonbinaries count as pooners, it's definitely for pooners.

Aw, I was remembering Vinnie's Tampon Cases, from when aesthetic sensibilities didn't mean you had to get your driver's license changed.

It's tough getting old.

 

[Premium Gonzo]

I'm eternally disappointed that these undies are period-themed, but not actual period panties. When you have to put a disclaimer up, you really should step back and consider expanding the line to include functional briefs. The market commands it!
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I bought so many of those they are actually the bomb when you leak because the material is thick, i wore all my out in the arse and crotch, so i washed them cut the crotch out and turned into a recycled quilt for my cat to sleep on. She loves it and i got to keep the cute prints. I'll see if i can take a picture of it came out pretty nice.

Wear a menstrual cup if you bleed through tampons.

I'm a general advocate for them anyway.

I've thought about a moon cup but i'm so irregular honestly i couldn't work out what kind of capacity i'd need. I love the extra absorbent pads for bladder control for older ladies after 5 kids, are my go to now they are super thick. Don't bunch and crinkle like a nappy like most pads and are long enough i can place them further back so i don't get the arse crack leak.

 

[Aunt Carol]

I've thought about a moon cup but i'm so irregular honestly i couldn't work out what kind of capacity i'd need.

The nice thing about menstrual cups relative to tampons is that you're not risking TSS like you would for using too high an absorbancy. It's just the equivalent of putting one serving of leftovers in the biggest Tupperware.

But it's true, cup wearers are the Crossfit/vegans of the menstrual world, so you don't need another sermon. Cup's worth a try, and these days they're so available in meatspace that I've seen menstrual cups in the clearance rack of the grocery store. You can try one on a whim, or on the directive of the Bargain Gods.

I had to mail a money order to an address from the back of the Utne Reader and wait 6-8 weeks for a hard rubber cup to arrive; today there are store brand menstrual cups on the shelves. This is a rare win in the retail sphere for women, damnit.

 

[Polexia Aphrodisia]

I've seen menstrual cups in the clearance rack of the grocery store

I will say - the "disposable" ones that are basically a silicone/rubber ring with a disposable foodservice glove attached to it, are terrible. I bought some store-brand once from the grocery store just to see how they were, and they sucked.

Felt ten times as wasteful as plastic applicator tampons, never seated properly, leaked like hell, and wildly difficult to remove without getting blood all over the hands.

Go for Mooncup, Diva Cup, Pixie Cup, Saltcup, whatever. Any of the ones that are entirely silicone and reusable.

 

[Aunt Carol]

I will say - the "disposable" ones that are basically a silicone/rubber ring with a disposable foodservice glove attached to it, are terrible. I bought some store-brand once from the grocery store just to see how they were, and they sucked.

I hate those! I bought a box back in the 1990s and kept having horrible "boinging" incidents.

But it's amazing how many knock-off Diva-type reusable cups are just next to the tampons in the lady aisle... and in the mark-down section next to the canned mincemeat.

 

[UnsufficentBoobage]

Confirming that anything I get prescribed for my neuralgia/carpal tunnel/whatever pain makes my period go haywire, I am on day 18 of my period*. Not fun, as not enough blood gushes out to warrant tampon use, so hello pad sores, but hope this will subside as I finish the pills.

*def not random bleeding cause achy breasts+retarded mood (cried over a comedy cartoon, got mad over internet like 12 times, nearly punched an assholish grandma who bitched at me while I was talking to nicer random grandma)

 

[UnsufficentBoobage]

I was changing a tampon in my friend's toilet, and a clot managed to 1) launch itself
2) onto a resin carpet EXACTLY in a place I stepped onto very next second.

Carpet is washable, but hauling a bag with bloody socks home is An Experience.

 

[Premium Gonzo]

I was changing a tampon in my friend's toilet, and a clot managed to 1) launch itself
2) onto a resin carpet EXACTLY in a place I stepped onto very next second.

Carpet is washable, but hauling a bag with bloody socks home is An Experience.

Now that is almost perfect horror right there.

 

[UnsufficentBoobage]

Now that is almost perfect horror right there.

Her toilet room is tiny, so it is only possible if you squash yourself like a heron when getting the tampon out, then sit down and air comes out of your vag like a tuba

 

[Dolomite]

I normally restrain my mood swings, yet an unexpected pat from a younger relative moved me to tears a few days ago. It felt incredible to release months' worth of bottled-up tension...

 

[Kari Kamiya]

Just a thought (like a shower thought, but stuck on the toilet):

Every single crazy lady obsessed with their menstrual blood has huffed period dust too long. Thst residue is like pixie dust for cat ladies with Peter Pan Syndrome.

 

[isalaide]

I read the other day (thanks to a leaflet in the post) that Always have cottoned on to the postnatal/perimenopausal trick of using incontinence pants to deal with flooding and invented disposable period pants of a similar naturemarketing them as 'ZZZs' night pants. Supposedly they have added smell protection.
This is an excellent and helpful development.

 

[Equal Rights for Androids]

The nice thing about menstrual cups relative to tampons is that you're not risking TSS like you would for using too high an absorbancy. It's just the equivalent of putting one serving of leftovers in the biggest Tupperware.

you can in fact get TSS from the cup.

also don't use a cup if you sing opera. it does not stay in when you're belting

 

[Aunt Carol]

you can in fact get TSS from the cup.

Yes, but it's orders of magnitude more rare. There's no substitution for hygiene.

I meant that one risk for TSS is using a tampon that's too big for one's current flow, but the same risk doesn't exist in using a cup that's 10mL "too large."

 

[Hassou Tobi]

Isn’t TSS really rare today? Thought it was more in the 70’s with their weird old fashioned tampons.

 

[Premium Gonzo]

Isn’t TSS really rare today? Thought it was more in the 70’s with their weird old fashioned tampons.

probably third world it'd be more common, just with the lack of hygiene options or knowledge.

Funnily enough i've been put on medication for recently diagnosed diabetus (pre diabetus). Since i've been taking the metformin even before my dietary changes i've been having regular and less intense periods overall.

Looked it up apparently metform is used to treat endo in patients, just a happy side effect but i'm actually having regular periods. No more 6 month 5 week heavy bleed with debilitating cramps.

I bleed for a week get some mild discomfort and i'm good to go for the next month, i can even use light period undies now. It's a fucking miracle, the diabetus is the best thing that's happened to me.

 

[A serious hat]

I know this is a little OT but any of y’all struggling with your period, try acupuncture. It cured me completely after 10 YEARS of hell. Went on to have multiple kids and haven’t had an issue since. Please try it if you have these issues. I swear it’ll change your life.

 

[cactus]

probably third world it'd be more common, just with the lack of hygiene options or knowledge.

Funnily enough i've been put on medication for recently diagnosed diabetus (pre diabetus). Since i've been taking the metformin even before my dietary changes i've been having regular and less intense periods overall.

Looked it up apparently metform is used to treat endo in patients, just a happy side effect but i'm actually having regular periods. No more 6 month 5 week heavy bleed with debilitating cramps.

I bleed for a week get some mild discomfort and i'm good to go for the next month, i can even use light period undies now. It's a fucking miracle, the diabetus is the best thing that's happened to me.

This isn't funny, just informational.

 

[Premium Gonzo]

This isn't funny, just informational.

I wasn't referencing TSS or lack of appropriate hygiene for women as funny.

But my own experience with having a shit period for most of my life has been resolved by getting sick with something else.

Which is funny because the medical system is so inept it, i was on a wait list for 8 months just to get an initial gyno appointment that i'd have to pay for out of pocket. Yet with diabetus everything is subsidized or funded fully to keep me alive.

 

[Dysnomia]

I read the other day (thanks to a leaflet in the post) that Always have cottoned on to the postnatal/perimenopausal trick of using incontinence pants to deal with flooding and invented disposable period pants of a similar naturemarketing them as 'ZZZs' night pants. Supposedly they have added smell protection.
This is an excellent and helpful development.

I actually thought about buying them because if I'm heavy I have to wear shorts to bed and that sucks in summer unless we can all agree to turn the AC on.

Also, I can't take the heat at all anyway and it might be less uncomfortable on ungodly hot days since I can just shower and toss it. It just feels weird wearing something like that though. But looking at them they look more like regular underwear. I think I'd prefer boyshorts style. Just to be sure.