Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

[Tsukasa Kadoya]

Five Nights at Fatty's, featuring Fatrick Fatbear.

The pizza is made with black kid pepperoni.

It's a testament to Patrick that after all these years that the "Enjoy Prison" copypasta still makes me burst into paralyzing laughter.

Whenever I find random Patposting in comments I always laugh like an idiot. I remember one video on Godzilla having a person "No stalker child"-ing someone and it threw me into hysterics.

 

[Troonos]

OnA guys found Patrick's Airbnb
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Please, God - let a KF member stay at the Airbnb and report back to us.

 

[Anti Snigger]

NO renter child, you may NOT watch the television past 10 PM, enjoy a low rating, renter child.

 

[Black Man Underwear]

Patrick is a Superfat
Superfats are experienced, highly rated piggies who are committed to providing great niggeroni for guests.

 

[Anonymus Fluhre]

Nobody should do this at least not from here but if one of the fancy lads felt like it, they should definitely get some Luminol along with the UV flashlight to see if there are any suspicious splatter patterns.

If they find some suspicious splatter I would recommend a phenolphthalein test due to the age of the splatter.

 

[Meat Target]

Patrick is literally a butler. And he thought a shift at Target was beneath him !

"You have never been the Caretaker, Mr. Tomlinson. This hovel has been a shithole since you moved in'".



"Your wife has been accepting flatulence from... a nigger. And needs to be....corrected."

 

['Ole Dente]

Somebody infiltrate the residence and leave a review like so:

"The place is lovely, I used it for a short vacation area. The beds were clean and the home was hospitable, however I can't help but mention the most oddest thing; There was a meat grinder in the far corner (pictured below.) I can't imagine why there would ever be a meat grinder in a basement Air BnB, perhaps the owner is an avid collector of old mechanical objects and thought it was aesthetically pleasing? Maybe he's a butcher by trade? Anyway, great stay, 5/5."

 

[JustSomeDong]

I didn't know you could turn an artisanal pepperoni mill into an airbnb. I would think there would be some kind of zoning issue.

 

[Sneak Deadly Gangster]

OnA guys found Patrick's Airbnb
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I would leave an upper decker on my last morning there.

 

[NoodleFucker3000]

This is legitimately the funniest thing.

 

[Sneak Deadly Gangster]

I didn't know you could turn an artisanal pepperoni mill into an airbnb. I would think there would be some kind of zoning issue.

The underground pepperoni market has been a time honored tradition in Milwaukee since 1990.

 

[Waifu Days]

Is this a new lolcow mecca?

 

[The REAL Hatsune Miku]

I am not a butcher and I do not own a meat grinder, lying child. Never stay at BnB again, stalker.

 

[Sneak Deadly Gangster]

Is this a new lolcow mecca?

I think so, we're unlikely to see a lolcow surpass Fatricia for the foreseeable future.

 

[Probably An Autist]

Considering how long this has been up without pests or anyone noticing just think how paranoid he must have been about it. Expecting that just like everything else in his life it too will get ruined.

His responses to guests are so on-brand too.

 

[Incel Death Note]

NO renter child, you may NOT watch the television past 10 PM, enjoy a low rating, renter child.

No little infant renter child, 11 AM is a perfectly fine time to arise for a working day, and you have awoken me with your niggernoise. YeT. Again. You shall maintain noise levels to below this many decibels until the morning. It states so in the craigslist contract. It is wriTTen. 11 AM counts as morning, little one. Wait for the knock.

 

[Waifu Days]

I think so, we're unlikely to see a lolcow surpass Fatricia for the foreseeable future.

Fatrick is dumb enough to invite the trolls to legally step foot on his property. At least Chris and Drackenlord didn't invite it.

Edit: I often forget just how retarded Drackenlord really is. He both invited and attempted to monetize his misery. Chris at the least only practiced bad Internet hygiene but attempted to get one over the trolls by making a Pokémon Go stop. Patrick needs to geocache something at his location to make the retarded circle complete.

 

[deepFriedBaka]

"No, child, I did not rent an Airbnb."

 

[Sneak Deadly Gangster]

Fatrick is dumb enough to invite the trolls to legally step foot on his property. At least Chris and Drackenlord didn't invite it.

My money says he waits in flying-dragon stance outside the door for the stalkers to violate the boundaries of their contract and seal their fates.

 

[Incel Death Note]

Fatrick is dumb enough to invite the trolls to legally step foot on his property. At least Chris and Drackenlord didn't invite it.

It's the dumbest thing, like aren't you the most swaTTed man in America? Don't you fear for your life daily and are currently suing the city you live in for that very reason? Why would you invite others into that situation? The only explanation would be if he knows the swats won't continue and the only way he'd know that is- ohhh.